Hehadnaturallyrepressedmuch,andsomerevulsionmighthavebeenexpectedinhimwhentheoccasionforrepressionwasgone.But,itwastheoldscaredlostlookthattroubledMr.Lorry;andthroughhisabsentmannerofclaspinghishead'anddrearilywanderingawayintohisownroomwhentheygotup-stairs,Mr.LorrywasremindedofDefargethewine-shopkeeper,andthestarlightride.
　　`Ithink,'hewhisperedtoMissPross,afteranxiousconsideration,`Ithinkwehadbestnotspeaktohimjustnow,oratalldisturbhim.ImustlookinatTellson's;soIwillgothereatonceandcomebackpresently.Then,wewilltakehimarideintothecountry,anddinethere,andallwillbewell.'
　　ItwaseasierforMr.LorrytolookinatTellson's,thantolookoutofTellson's.Hewasdetainedtwohours.Whenhecameback,heascendedtheoldstaircasealone,havingaskednoquestionoftheservant;goingthusintotheDoctorsrooms,hewasstoppedbyalowsoundofknocking.
　　`GoodGod!'hesaid,withastart.`What'sthat?'
　　MissPross,withaterrifiedface,wasathisear.`Ome,Ome!Allislost!'criedshe,wringingherhands.`WhatistobetoldtoLadybird?Hedoesn'tknowme,andismakingshoes!'
　　Mr.Lorrysaidwhathecouldtocalmher,andwenthimselfintotheDoctor'sroom.Thebenchwasturnedtowardsthelight,asithadbeenwhenhehadseentheshoemakerathisworkbefore,andhisheadwasbentdown,andhewasverybusy.
　　`DoctorManette.Mydearfriend,DoctorManette!'
　　TheDoctorlookedathimforamoment——halfinquiringly,halfasifhewereangryatbeingspokento——andbentoverhisworkagain.
　　Hehadlaidasidehiscoatandwaistcoat;hisshirtwasopenatthethroat,asitusedtobewhenhedidthatwork;andeventheoldhaggard,fadedsurfaceoffacehadcomebacktohim.Heworkedhard——impatiently——asifinsomesenseofhavingbeeninterrupted.
　　Mr.Lorryglancedattheworkinhishand,andobservedthatitwasashoeoftheoldsizeandshape.Hetookupanotherthatwaslyingbyhim,andaskedwhatitwas?
　　`Ayounglady'swalkingshoe,'hemuttered,withoutlookingup'`Itoughttohavebeenfinishedlongago.Letitbe.'
　　`But,DoctorManette.Lookatme'
　　Heobeyed,intheoldmechanicallysubmissivemanner,withoutpausinginhiswork.
　　`Youknowme,mydearfriend?Thinkagain.Thisisnotyourproperoccupation.Think,dearfriend!'
　　Nothingwouldinducehimtospeakmore.Helookedup,foraninstantatatime,whenhewasrequestedtodoso;but,nopersuasionwouldextractawordfromhim.Heworked,andworked,andworked,insilence,andwordsfellonhimastheywouldhavefallenonanecholesswall,orontheair.TheonlyrayofhopethatMr.Lorrycoulddiscover,was,thathesometimesfurtivelylookedupwithoutbeingasked.Inthat,thereseemedafaintexpressionofcuriosityorperplexity——asthoughheweretryingtoreconcilesomedoubtsinhismind.
　　TwothingsatonceimpressedthemselvesonMr.Lorry,asimportantaboveallothers;thefirst,thatthismustbekeptsecretfromLucie;thesecondthatitmustbekeptsecretfromallwhoknewhim.InconjunctionwithMissPross,hetookimmediatestepstowardsthelatterprecaution,bygivingoutthattheDoctorwasnotwell,andrequiredafewdaysofcompleterest.Inaidofthekinddeceptiontobepractisedonhisdaughter,MissProsswastowrite,describinghishavingbeencalledawayprofessionally,andreferringtoanimaginaryletteroftwoorthreehurriedlinesinhisownhand,representedtohavebeenaddressedtoherbythesamepost.
　　Thesemeasures,advisabletobetakeninanycase,Mr.Lorrytookinthehopeofhiscomingtohimself.Ifthatshouldhappensoon,hekeptanothercourseinreserve;whichwas,tohaveacertainopinionthathethoughtthebest,ontheDoctor'scase.
　　Inthehopeofhisrecovery,andofresorttothisthirdcoursebeingtherebyrenderedpracticable,Mr.Lorryresolvedtowatchhimattentively,withaslittleappearanceaspossibleofdoingso.HethereforemadearrangementstoabsenthimselffromTellson'sforthefirsttimeinhislife,andtookhispostbythewindowinthesameroom.
　　Hewasnotlongindiscoveringthatitwasworsethanuselesstospeaktohim,since,onbeingpressed,hebecameworried.Heabandonedthatattemptonthefirstday,andresolvedmerelytokeephimselfalwaysbeforehim,asasilentprotestagainstthedelusionintowhichhehadfallen,orwasfalling.Heremained,therefore,inhisseatnearthewindow,readingandwriting,andexpressinginasmanypleasantandnaturalwaysashecouldthinkofthatitwasafreeplace.
　　DoctorManettetookwhatwasgivenhimtoeatanddrink,andworkedon,thatfirstday,untilitwastoodarktosee——workedon,halfanhourafterMr.Lorrycouldnothaveseen,forhislife,toreadorwrite.Whenheputhistoolsasideasuseless,untilmorning,Mr.Lorryroseandsaidtohim:
　　`Willyougoout?'"
　　Helookeddownattheflooroneithersideofhimintheoldmanner,lookedupintheoldmanner,andrepeatedintheoldlowvoice:
　　`Out?'
　　`Yes;forawalkwithme.Whynot?'
　　Hemadenoefforttosaywhynot,andsaidnotawordmore.But,Mr.Lorrythoughthesaw,asheleanedforwardonhisbenchinthedusk,withhiselbowsonhiskneesandhisheadinhishands,thathewasinsomemistywayaskinghimself`Whynot?'Thesagacityofthemanofbusinessperceivedanadvantagehere,anddeterminedtoholdit.
　　MissProssandhedividedthenightintotwowatches,andobservedhimatintervalsfromtheadjoiningroom.Hepacedupanddownforalongtimebeforehelaydown;but,whenhedidfinallylayhimselfdown,hefellasleep.Inthemorning,hewasupbetimes,andwentstraighttohisbenchandtowork.
　　Onthissecondday,Mr.Lorrysalutedhimcheerfullybyhisname,andspoketohimontopicsthathadbeenoflatefamiliartothem.Hereturnednoreply,butitwasevidentthatheheardwhatwassaid,andthathethoughtaboutit,howeverconfusedly.ThisencouragedMr.LorrytohaveMissProssinwithherwork,severaltimesduringtheday;atthosetimes,theyquietlyspokeofLucie,andofherfatherthenpresent,preciselyintheusualmanner,andasiftherewerenothingamiss.Thiswasdonewithoutanydemonstrativeaccompaniment,notlongenough,oroftenenoughtoharasshim;anditlightenedMr.Lorry'sfriendlyhearttobelievethathelookedupoftener,andthatheappearedtobestirredbysomeperceptionofinconsistenciessurroundinghim.
　　Whenitfelldarkagain,Mr.Lorryaskedhimasbefore:
　　`DearDoctor,willyougoout?'
　　Asbefore,herepeated,`Out?'
　　`Yes;forawalkwithme.Whynot?'
　　Thistime,Mr.Lorryfeignedtogooutwhenhecouldextractnoanswerfromhim,and,afterremainingabsentforanhour,returned.Inthemeanwhile,theDoctorhadremovedtotheseatinthewindow,andhadsattherelookingdownattheplane-tree;but,onMr.Lorry'sreturn,heslippedawaytohisbench.
　　Thetimewentveryslowlyon,andMr.Lorry'shopedarkened,andhisheartgrewheavieragain,andgrewyetheavierandheaviereveryday.Thethirddaycameandwent,thefourth,thefifth.Fivedays,sixdays,sevendays,eightdays,ninedays.
　　Withahopeeverdarkening,andwithaheartalwaysgrowingheavierandheavier,Mr.Lorrypassedthroughthisanxioustime.Thesecretwaswellkept,andLuciewasunconsciousandhappy;buthecouldnotfailtoobservethattheshoemaker,whosehandhadbeenalittleoutatfirst,wasgrowingdreadfullyskilful,andthathehadneverbeensointentonhiswork,andthathishandshadneverbeensonimbleandexpert,asintheduskoftheninthevening.
　　CHAPTERXIX
　　AnOpinion
　　WORNoutbyanxiouswatching,Mr.Lorryfellasleepathispost.Onthetenthmorningofhissuspense,hewasstartledbytheshiningofthesunintotheroomwhereaheavyslumberhadovertakenhimwhenitwasdarknight.
　　Herubbedhiseyesandrousedhimself;buthedoubted,whenhehaddoneso,whetherhewasnotstillasleep.For,goingtothedooroftheDoctor'sroomandlookingin,heperceivedthattheshoemaker'sbenchandtoolswereputasideagain,andthattheDoctorhimselfsatreadingatthewindow.Hewasinhisusualmorningdress,andhisfacewhichMr.Lorrycoulddistinctlysee,thoughstillverypale,wascalmlystudiousandattentive.
　　Evenwhenhehadsatisfiedhimselfthathewasawake,Mr.Lorryfeltgiddilyuncertainforsomefewmomentswhetherthelateshoemakingmightnotbeadisturbeddreamofhisown;for,didnothiseyesshowhimhisfriendbeforehiminhisaccustomedclothingandaspect,andemployedasusual;andwasthereanysignwithintheirrange,thatthechangeofwhichhehadsostronganimpressionhadactuallyhappened?
　　Itwasbuttheinquiryofhisfirstconfusionandastonishment,theanswerbeingobvious.Iftheimpressionwerenotproducedbyarealcorrespondingandsufficientcause,howcamehe,JarvisLorry,there?Howcamehetohavefallenasleep,inhisclothes,onthesofainDr.Manette'sconsulting-room,andtobedebatingthesepointsoutsidetheDoctor'sbedroomdoorintheearlymorning?
　　Withinafewminutes,MissProssstoodwhisperingathisside.Ifhehadhadanyparticleofdoubtleft,hertalkwouldofnecessityhaveresolvedit;buthewasbythattimeclearheaded,andhadnone.Headvisedthattheyshouldletthetimegobyuntiltheregularbreakfast-hour,andshouldthenmeettheDoctorasifnothingunusualhadoccurred.Ifheappearedtobeinhiscustomarystateofmind,Mr.Lorrywouldthencautiouslyproceedtoseekdirectionandguidancefromtheopinionhehadbeen,inhisanxiety,soanxioustoobtain.
　　MissProsssubmittingherselftohisjudgment,theschemewasworkedoutwithcare.Havingabundanceoftimeforhisusualmethodicaltoilette,Mr.Lorrypresentedhimselfatthebreakfast-hourinhisusualwhitelinen,andwithhisusualneatleg.TheDoctorwassummonedintheusualway,andcametobreakfast.
　　SofarasitwaspossibletocomprehendhimwithoutoversteppingthosedelicateandgradualapproacheswhichMr.Lorryfelttobetheonlysafeadvance,heatfirstsupposedthathisdaughter'smarriagehadtakenplaceyesterday.Anincidentalallusion,purposelythrownout,tothedayoftheweek,andthedayofthemonth,sethimthinkingandcounting,andevidentlymadehimuneasy.Inallotherrespects,however,hewassocomposedlyhimself,thatMr.Lorrydeterminedtohavetheaidhesought.Andthataidwashisown.
　　Therefore,whenthebreakfastwasdoneandclearedaway,andheandtheDoctorwerelefttogether,Mr.Lorrysaid,feelingly:
　　`MydearManette,Iamanxioustohaveyouropinion,inconfidence,onaverycuriouscaseinwhichIamdeeplyinterested;thatistosay,itisverycurioustome;perhaps,toyourbetterinformationitmaybelessso.'
　　Glancingathishands,whichwerediscolouredbyhislatework,theDoctorlookedtroubled,andlistenedattentively.Hehadalreadyglancedathishandsmorethanonce.
　　`DoctorManette,'saidMr.Lorry,touchinghimaffectionatelyonthearm,`thecaseisthecaseofaparticularlydearfriendofmine.Praygiveyourmindtoit,andadvisemewellforhissake——andaboveall,forhisdaughter's——hisdaughter's,mydearManette.'
　　`IfIunderstand,'saidtheDoctor,inasubduedtone,`somementalshock——?'
　　`Yes!'
　　`Beexplicit,'saidtheDoctor.`Sparenodetail.'
　　Mr.Lorrysawthattheyunderstoodoneanother,andproceeded.
　　`MydearManette,itisthecaseofanoldandaprolongedshock,ofgreatacutenessandseveritytotheaffections,thefeelings,the——the——asyouexpressit——themind.Themind.Itisthecaseofashockunderwhichthesuffererwasbornedown,onecannotsayforhowlong,becauseIbelievehecannotcalculatethetimehimself,andtherearenoothermeansofgettingatit.Itisthecaseofashockfromwhichthesuffererrecovered,byaprocessthathecannottracehimself——asIonceheardhimpubliclyrelateinastrikingmanner.Itisthecaseofashockfromwhichhehasrecovered,socompletely,astobeahighlyintelligentman,capableofcloseapplicationofmind,andgreatexertionofbody,andofconstantlymakingfreshadditionstohisstockofknowledge,whichwasalreadyverylarge.But,unfortunately,therehasbeen'——hepausedaddtookadeepbreath——`aslightrelapse.'
　　TheDoctor,inalowvoice,asked,`Ofhowlongduration?'
　　`Ninedaysandnights.'
　　`Howdiditshowitself?Iinfer,'glancingathishandsagain,`intheresumptionofsomeoldpursuitconnectedwiththeshock?'
　　`Thatisthefact.'
　　`Now,didyoueverseehim,'askedtheDoctor,distinctlyandcollectedly,thoughinthesamelowvoice,`engagedinthatpursuitoriginally?'
　　`Once.'
　　`Andwhentherelapsefellonhim,washeinmostrespects——orinallrespects——ashewasthen?'
　　`Ithinkinallrespects.'
　　`Youspokeofhisdaughter.Doeshisdaughterknowoftherelapse?'
　　`No.Ithasbeenkeptfromher,andIhopewillalwaysbekeptfromher.Itisknownonlytomyself,andtooneotherwhomaybetrusted.'
　　TheDoctorgraspedhishand,andmurmured,`Thatwasverykind.Thatwasverythoughtful!'Mr.Lorrygraspedhishandinreturn,andneitherofthetwospokeforalittlewhile.
　　`Now,mydearManette,'saidMr.Lorry,atlength,inhismostconsiderateandmostaffectionateway,`Iamameremanofbusiness,andunfittocopewithsuchintricateanddifficultmatters.Idonotpossessthekindofinformationnecessary;Idonotpossessthekindofintelligence;Iwantguiding.ThereisnomaninthisworldonwhomIcouldsorelyforrightguidance,asonyou.Tellme,howdoesthisrelapsecomeabout?Istheredangerofanother?Couldarepetitionofitbeprevented?Howshouldarepetitionofitbetreated?Howdoesitcomeaboutatall?WhatcanIdoformyfriend?Nomanevercanhavebeenmoredesirousinhishearttoserveafriend,thanIamtoservemine,ifIknewhow.ButIdon'tknowhowtooriginate,insuchacase.Ifyoursagacity,knowledge,andexperience,couldputmeontherighttrack,Imightbeabletodosomuch;unenlightenedandundirected,Icandosolittle.Praydiscussitwithme;prayenablemetoseeitalittlemoreclearly,andteachmehowtobealittlemoreuseful.'
　　DoctorManettesatmeditatingaftertheseearnestwordswerespoken,andMr.Lorrydidnotpresshim.
　　`Ithinkso'itprobable,'saidtheDoctor,breakingsilencewithaneffort,`thattherelapseyouhavedescribed,mydearfriend,wasnotquiteunforeseenbyitssubject.'
　　`Wasitdreadedbyhim?'Mr.Lorryventuredtoask.
　　`Verymuch.'Hesaiditwithaninvoluntaryshudder.
　　`Youhavenoideahowsuchanapprehensionweighsonthesufferer'smind,andhowdifficult——howalmostimpossible——itis,forhimtoforcehimselftoutteraworduponthetopicthatoppresseshim.'
　　`Wouldhe,'askedMr.Lorry,`hesensiblyrelievedifhecouldprevailuponhimselftoimpartthatsecretbroodingtoanyone,whenitisonhim?'
　　`Ithinkso.Butitis,asIhavetoldyou,nexttoimpossible.Ievenbelieveit——insomecases——tobequiteimpossible.'
　　`Now,'saidMr.Lorry,gentlylayinghishandontheDoctor'sarmagain,afterashortsilenceonbothsides,`towhatwouldyoureferthisattack?'
　　`Ibelieve,'returnedDoctorManette,`thattherehadbeenastrongandextraordinaryrevivalofthetrainofthoughtandremembrancethatwasthefirstcauseofthemalady.Someintenseassociationsofamostdistressingnaturewerevividlyrecalled,Ithink.Itisprobablethattherehadlongbeenadreadlurkinginhismind,thatthoseassociationswouldberecalled——say,undercertaincircumstances——say,onaparticularoccasion.Hetriedtopreparehimselfinvain;perhapstheefforttopreparehimselfmadehimlessabletobearit.'
　　`Wouldherememberwhattookplaceintherelapse?'askedMr.Lorry,withnaturalhesitation.
　　TheDoctorlookeddesolatelyroundtheroom,shookhishead,andanswered,inalowvoice,`Notatall.'
　　`Now,astothefuture,'hintedMr.Lorry.
　　`Astothefuture,'saidtheDoctor,recoveringfirmness,`Ishouldhavegreathope.AsitpleasedHeaveninitsmercytorestorehimsosoon,Ishouldhavegreathope.He;yieldingunderthepressureofacomplicatedsomething,longdreadedandlongvaguelyforeseenandcontendedagainst,andrecoveringafterthecloudhadburstandpassed,Ishouldhopethattheworstwasover.'
　　`Well,well!That'sgoodcomfort.Iamthankful!'saidMr.Lorry.
　　`Iamthankful!'repeatedtheDoctor,bendinghisheadwithreverence.
　　`Therearetwootherpoints,'saidMr.Lorry,`onwhichIamanxioustobeinstructed.Imaygoon?
　　`Youcannotdoyourfriendabetterservice.'TheDoctorgavehimhishand.
　　`Tothefirst,then.Heisofastudioushabit,andunusuallyenergetic;heapplieshimselfwithgreatardourtotheacquisitionofprofessionalknowledge,totheconductingofexperiments,tomanythings.Now,doeshedotoomuch?'
　　`Ithinknot.Itmaybethecharacterofhismind,tobealwaysinsingularneedofoccupation.Thatmaybe,inpart,naturaltoit;inpart,theresultofaffliction.Thelessitwasoccupiedwithhealthythings,themoreitwouldbeindangerofturningintheunhealthydirection.Hemayhaveobservedhimself,andmadethediscovery.'
　　`Youaresurethatheisnotundertoogreatastrain?'
　　`IthinkIamquitesureofit.'
　　`MydearManette,ifhewereoverworkednow'
　　`MydearLorry,Idoubtifthatcouldeasilybe.Therehasbeenaviolentstressinonedirection,anditneedsacounter-weight.'
　　`Excuseme,asapersistentmanofbusiness.Assumingforamoment,thathewasoverworked;itwouldshowitselfinsomerenewalofthisdisorder?'
　　`Idonotthinkso.Idonotthink,'saidDoctorManettewiththefirmnessofself-conviction,`thatanythingbuttheonetrainofassociationwouldrenewit.Ithinkthat,hence-forth,nothingbutsomeextraordinaryjarringofthatchordcouldrenewit.Alterwhathashappened,andafterhisrecovery,Ifinditdifficulttoimagineanysuchviolentsoundingofthatstringagain.Itrust,andIalmostbelieve,thatthecircumstanceslikelytorenewitareexhausted.'
　　Hespokewiththediffidenceofamanwhoknewhowslightathingwouldoversetthedelicateorganisationofthemind,andyetwiththeconfidenceofamanwhohadslowlywonhisassuranceoutofpersonalenduranceanddistress.Itwasnotforhisfriendtoabatethatconfidence.Heprofessedhimselfmorerelievedandencouragedthanhereallywas,andapproachedhissecondandlastpoint.Hefeltittobethemostdifficultofall;but,rememberinghisoldSundaymorningconversationwithMissPross,andrememberingwhathehadseeninthelastninedays,heknewthathemustfaceit.
　　`Theoccupationresumedundertheinfluenceofthispassingafflictionsohappilyrecoveredfrom,'saidMr.Lorry,clearinghisthroat,`wewillcall-Blacksmith'swork,Blacksmith'swork.Wewillsay,toputacaseandforthesakeofillustration,thathehadbeenused,inhisbadtime,toworkatalittleforge.Wewillsaythathewasunexpectedlyfoundathisforgeagain.Isitnotapitythatheshouldkeepitbyhim?'
　　TheDoctorshadedhisforeheadwithhishand,andbeathisfootnervouslyontheground.
　　`Hehasalwayskeptitbyhim,'saidMr.Lorry,withananxiouslookathisfriend.`Now,woulditnotbebetterthatheshouldletitgo?'
　　Still,theDoctor,withshadedforehead,beathisfootnervouslyontheground.
　　`Youdonotfinditeasytoadviseme?'saidMr.Lorry.
　　`Iquiteunderstandittobeanicequestion.AndyetIthink——'Andthereheshookhishead,andstopped.
　　`Yousee,'saidDoctorManette,turningtohimafteranuneasypause,`itisveryhardtoexplain,consistently,theinnermostworkingsofthispoorman'smind.Heonceyearnedsofrightfullyforthatoccupation,anditwassowelcomewhenitcame;nodoubtitrelievedhispainsomuch,bysubstitutingtheperplexityofthefingersfortheperplexityofthebrain,andbysubstituting,ashebecamemorepractised,theingenuityofthehands,fortheingenuityofthementaltorture;thathehasneverbeenabletobearthethoughtofputtingitquiteoutofhisreach.Evennow,whenIbelieveheismorehopefulofhimselfthanhehaseverbeen,andevenspeaksofhimselfwithakindofconfidence,theideathathemightneedthatoldemployment,andnotfindit,giveshimasuddensenseofterror,likethatwhichonemayfancystrikestotheheartofalostchild.'
　　Helookedlikehisillustration,asheraisedhiseyestoMr.Lob'sface.`Butmaynot——mind!Iaskforinformation,asaploddingmanofbusinesswhoonlydealswithsuchmaterialobjectsasguineas,shillings,andbank-notes——maynottheretentionofthethinginvolvetheretentionoftheidea?Ifthethingweregone,mydearManette,mightnotthefeargowithit?Inshort,isitnotaconcessiontothemisgiving,tokeeptheforge?'
　　Therewasanothersilence.
　　`Yousee,too,'saidtheDoctor,tremulously,`itissuchanoldcompanion.'
　　`Iwouldnotkeepit,'saidMr.Lorry,shakinghishead;forhegainedinfirmnessashesawtheDoctordisquieted.`Iwouldrecommendhimtosacrificeit.Ionlywantyourauthority.Iamsureitdoesnogood.Come!Givemeyourauthority,likeadeargoodman.Forhisdaughter'ssake,mydearManette!'
　　Verystrangetoseewhatastruggletherewaswithinhim!`Inhername,then,letitbedone;Isanctionit.But,Iwouldnottakeitawaywhilehewaspresent.Letitberemovedwhenheisnotthere;lethimmisshisoldcompanionafteranabsence.'
　　Mr.Lorryreadilyengagedforthat,andtheconferencewasended.Theypassedthedayinthecountry,andtheDoctorwasquiterestored.Onthethreefollowingdaysheremainedperfectlywell,andonthefourteenthdayhewentawaytojoinLucieandherhusband.Theprecautionthathadbeentakentoaccountforhissilence,Mr.Lorryhadpreviouslyexplainedtohim,andhehadwrittentoLucieinaccordancewithit,andshehadnosuspicions.
　　Onthenightofthedayonwhichheleftthehouse,Mr.Lorrywentintohisroomwithachopper,saw,chisel,andhammer,attendedbyMissProsscarryingalight.There,withcloseddoors,andinamysteriousandguiltymanner,Mr.Lorryhackedtheshoemaker'sbenchtopieces,whileMissProssheldthecandleasifshewereassistingatamurder——orwhich,indeed,inhergrimness,shewasnounsuitablefigure.Theburningofthebodypreviouslyreducedtopiecesconvenientforthepurposewascommencedwithoutdelayinthekitchenfire;andthetools,shoes,andleather,wereburiedinthegarden.Sowickeddodestructionandsecrecyappeartohonestminds,thatMr.LorryandMissPross,whileenragedinthecommissionoftheirdeedandintheremovalofitstraces,almostfelt,andalmostlooked,likeaccomplicesinahorriblecrime.
　　CHAPTERXX
　　APlea
　　WHENthenewly-marriedpaircamehome,thefirstpersonwhoappeared,toofferhiscongratulations,wasSydneyCarton.Theyhadnotbeenathomemanyhours,whenhepresentedhimself.Hewasnotimprovedinhabits,orinlooks,orinmanner;buttherewasacertainruggedairoffidelityabouthim,whichwasnewtotheobservationofCharlesDarnay.
　　HewatchedhisopportunityoftakingDarnayasideintoawindow,andofspeakingtohimwhennooneoverheard.
　　`Mr.Darnay,'saidCarton,`Iwishwemightbefriends.'
　　`Wearealreadyfriends,Ihope.'
　　`Youaregoodenoughtosayso,asafashionofspeech;hut,Idon'tmeananyfashionofspeech.Indeed,whenIsayIwishwemightbefriends,Iscarcelymeanquitethat,either.'
　　CharlesDarnay——Aswasnatural——Askedhim,inallgood-humourandgood-fellowship,whathedidmean?
　　`Uponmylife,'saidCarton,smiling,`Ifindthateasiertocomprehendinmyownmind,thantoconveytoyours.However,letmetry.YourememberacertainfamousoccasionwhenIwasmoredrunkthan——thanusual?'
　　`Irememberacertainfamousoccasionwhenyouforcedmetoconfessthatyouhadbeendrinking.'
　　`Irememberittoo.Thecurseofthoseoccasionsisheavyuponme,forIalwaysrememberthem.Ihopeitmaybetakenintoaccountoneday,whenalldaysareatanendforme!Don'tbealarmed;Iamnotgoingtopreach.'
　　`Iamnotatallalarmed.Earnestnessinyouisanythingbutalarmingtome.'
　　`Ah!'saidCarton,withacarelesswaveofhishand,asifhewavedthataway.`Onthedrunkenoccasioninquestiononeofalargenumber,asyouknow,Iwasinsufferableaboutlikingyou,andnotlikingyou.Iwishyouwouldforgetit.'
　　`Iforgotitlongago.'
　　`Fashionofspeechagain!But,Mr.Darnay,oblivionisnotsoeasytome,asyourepresentittobetoyou.Ihavebynomeansforgottenit,andalightanswerdoesnothelpmetoforgetit.'
　　`Ifitwasalightanswer,'returnedDarnay,`Ibegyourforgivenessforit.Ihadnootherobjectthantoturnaslightthing,which,tomysurprise,seemstotroubleyoutoomuch,aside.Ideclaretoyouonthefaithofagentleman,thatIhavelongdismisseditfrommymind.GoodHeaven,whatwastheretodismiss!HaveIhadnothingmoreimportanttoremember,inthegreatserviceyourenderedmethatday?'
　　`Astothegreatservice,'saidCarton,`Iamboundtoavowtoyou,whenyouspeakofitinthatway,thatitwasmereprofessionalclaptrap.Idon'tknowthatIcaredwhatbecameofyou,whenIrenderedIt——Mind!IsaywhenIrenderedit;Iamspeakingofthepast.'
　　`Youmakelightoftheobligation,'returnedDarnay,`butIwillnotquarrelwithyourlightanswer.'
　　`Genuinetruth,Mr.Darnay,trustme!Ihavegoneasidefrommypurpose;Iwasspeakingaboutourbeingfriends.Now,youknowme;youknowIamincapableofallthehigherandbetterflightsofmen.Ifyoudoubtit,askStryver,andhe'lltellyouso.'
　　`Iprefertoformmyownopinion,withouttheaidofhis.'
　　`Well!Atanyrateyouknowmeasadissolutedogwhohasneverdoneanygood,andneverwill.'
　　`Idon'tknowthatyou"neverwill."'
　　`ButIdo,andyoumusttakemywordforit.Well!Ifyoucouldenduretohavesuchaworthlessfellow,andafellowofsuchindifferentreputation,comingandgoingatoddtimes,IshouldaskthatImightbepermittedtocomeandgoasaprivilegedpersonhere;thatImightberegardedasanuselessandIwouldadd,ifitwerenotfortheresemblanceIdetectedbetweenyouandme,anunornamental,pieceoffurniture,toleratedforitsoldservice,andtakennonoticeof.IdoubtifIshouldabusethepermission.ItisahundredtooneifIshouldavailmyselfofitfourtimesinayear.Itwouldsatisfyme,Idaresay,toknowthatIhadit.'
　　`Willyoutry?'
　　`ThatisanotherwayofsayingthatIamplacedonthefootingIhaveindicated.Ithankyou,Darnay.Imayusethatfreedomwithyourname?'
　　`Ithinkso,Carton,bythistime.'
　　Theyshookhandsuponit,andSydneyturnedaway.Withinaminuteafterwards,hewas,toalloutwardappearance,asunsubstantialasever.
　　Whenhehasgone,andinthecourseofaneveningpassedwithMissPross,theDoctor,andMr.Lorry,CharlesDarnaymadesomementionofthisconversationingeneralterms,andspokeofSydneyCartonasaproblemofcarelessnessandrecklessness.Hespokeofhim,inshort,notbitterlyormeaningtobearharduponhim,butasanybodymightwhosawhimasheshowedhimself.
　　Hehadnoideathatthiscoulddwellinthethoughtsofhisfairyoungwife;but,whenheafterwardsjoinedherintheirownrooms,hefoundherwaitingforhimwiththeoldprettyliftingoftheforeheadstronglymarked.
　　`Wearethoughtfulto-night!'saidDarnay,drawinghisarmabouther.
　　`Yes,dearestCharles,'withherhandsonhisbreast,andtheinquiringandattentiveexpressionfixeduponhim;`weareratherthoughtfulto-night,forwehavesomethingonourmindto-night.'
　　`Whatisit,myLucie?'
　　`Willyoupromisenottopressonequestiononme,ifIbegyounottoaskit?'
　　"WillIpromise?WhatwillInotpromisetomyLove?'
　　What,indeed,withhishandputtingasidethegoldenhairfromthecheek,andhisotherhandagainsttheheartthatbeatforhim!
　　`Ithink,Charles,poorMr.Cartondeservesmoreconsiderationandrespectthanyouexpressedforhimto-night.'
　　`Indeed,myown?Whyso?'
　　`Thatiswhatyouarenottoaskme?ButIthink——Iknow——hedoes.'
　　`Ifyouknowit,itisenough.Whatwouldyouhavemedo,myLife?'
　　`Iwouldaskyou,dearest,tobeverygenerouswithhimalways,andverylenientonhisfaultswhenheisnotby.Iwouldaskyoutobelievethathehasahearthevery,veryseldomreveals,andthattherearedeepwoundsinit.Mydear,Ihaveseenitbleeding.'
　　`Itisapainfulreflectiontome,saidCharlesDarnay,quiteastounded,`thatIshouldhavedonehimanywrong.Ineverthoughtthisofhim.'
　　`Myhusband,itisso.Ifearheisnottobereclaimed;thereisscarcelyahopethatanythinginhischaracterorfortunesisreparablenow.But,Iamsurethatheiscapableofgoodthings,gentlethings,evenmagnanimousthings.'
　　Shelookedsobeautifulinthepurityofherfaithinthislostman,thatherhusbandcouldhavelookedatherasshewasforhours.
　　`And,OmydearestLove!'sheurged,clingingnearertohim,layingherheaduponhisbreast,andraisinghereyestohis,`rememberhowstrongweareinourhappiness,andhowweakheisinhismisery!'
　　Thesupplicationtouchedhimhome.`Iwillalwaysrememberit,dearHeart!IwillrememberitaslongasIlive.'
　　Hebentoverthegoldenhead,andputtherosylipstohis,andfoldedherinhisarms.Ifoneforlornwandererthenpacingthedarkstreets,couldhaveheardherinnocentdisclosure,andcouldhaveseenthedropsofpitykissedawaybyherhusbandfromthesoftblueeyessolovingofthathusband,hemighthavecriedtothenight——andthewordswouldnothavepartedfromhislipsforthefirsttime——
　　`Godblessherforhersweetcompassion!'
　　CHAPTERXXI
　　EchoingFootsteps
　　AWONDERFULcornerforechoes,ithasbeenremarked,thatcornerwheretheDoctorlived.Everbusilywindingthegoldenthreadwhichboundherhusband,andherfather,andherself,andherolddirectressandcompanion,inalifeofquietbliss,Luciesatinthestillhouseinthetranquillyresoundingcorner,listeningtotheechoingfootstepsofyears.
　　Atfirst,thereweretimes,thoughshewasaperfectlyhappyyoungwife,whenherworkwouldslowlyfallfromherhands,andhereyeswouldbedimmed.For,therewassomethingcomingintheechoes,somethinglight,afaroff,andscarcelyaudibleyet,thatstirredherhearttoomuch.Flutteringhopesanddoubts——hope,ofaloveasyetunknowntoher:doubts,ofherremaininguponearth,toenjoythatnewdelight——dividedherbreast.Amongtheechoesthen,therewouldarisethesoundoffootstepsatherownearlygrave;andthoughtsofthehusbandwhowouldbeleftsodesolate,andwhowouldmournforhersomuch,swelledtohereyes,andbrokelikewaves.
　　Thattimepassed,andherlittleLucielayonherbosom.Then,amongtheadvancingechoes,therewasthetreadofhertinyfeetandthesoundofherprattlingwords.Letgreaterechoesresoundastheywould,theyoungmotheratthecradlesidecouldalwayshearthosecoming.Theycame,andtheshadyhousewassunnywithachild'slaugh,andtheDivinefriendofchildren,towhominhertroubleshehadconfidedhers,seemedtotakeherchildinHisarms,asHetookthechildofold,andmadeitasacredjoytoher.
　　Everbusilywindingthegoldenthreadthatboundthemalltogether,weavingtheserviceofherhappyinfluencethroughthetissueofalltheirlives,andmakingitpredominatenowhere,Lucieheardintheechoesofyearsnonebutfriendlyandsoothingsounds.Herhusband'sstepwasstrongandprosperousamongthem;herfather'sfirmandequal.Lo,MissPross,inharnessofstring,awakeningtheechoes,asanunrulycharger,whip-corrected,snortingandpawingtheearthundertheplane-treeinthegarden!
　　Evenwhenthereweresoundsofsorrowamongtherest,theywerenotharshnorcruel.Evenwhengoldenhair,likeherown,layinahaloonapillowroundthewornfaceofalittleboy,andhesaid,witharadiantsmile,`Dearpapaandmamma,Iamverysorrytoleaveyouboth,andtoleavemyprettysister;butIamcalled,andImustgo!'thosewerenottearsallofagonythatwettedhisyoungmother'scheek,asthespiritdepartedfromherembracethathadbeenentrustedtoit.Sufferthemandforbidthemnot.TheyseemyFather'sface.OFather,blessedwords!
　　Thus,therustlingofanAngel'swingsgotblendedwiththeotherechoes,andtheywerenotwhollyofearth,buthadinthemthatbreathofHeaven.Sighsofthewindsthatblewoveralittlegarden-tombweremingledwiththemalso,andbothwereaudibletoLucie,inahushedmurmur——likethebreathingofasummerseaasleepuponasandyshore——asthelittleLucie,comicallystudiousatthetaskofthemorning,ordressingadollathermother'sfootstool,chatteredinthetonguesoftheTwoCitiesthatwereblendedinherlife.
　　TheechoesrarelyansweredtotheactualtreadofSydneyCarton.Somehalf-dozentimesayear,atmost,heclaimedhisprivilegeofcominginuninvited,andwouldsitamongthemthroughtheevening,ashehadoncedoneoften.Henevercamethereheatedwithwine.Andoneotherthingregardinghimwaswhisperedintheechoes,whichhasbeenwhisperedbyalltrueechoesforagesandages.
　　Nomaneverreallylovedawoman,losther,andknewherwithablamelessthoughanunchangedmind,whenshewasawifeandamother,butherchildrenhadastrangesympathywithhim——aninstinctivedelicacyofpityforhim.Whatfinehiddensensibilitiesaretouchedinsuchacase,noechoestell;butitisso,anditwassohere.CartonwasthefirststrangertowhomlittleLucieheldoutherchubbyarms,andhekepthisplacewithherasshegrew.Thelittleboyhadspokenofhim,almostatthelast.`PoorCarton!Kisshimforme!'
　　Mr.Stryvershoulderedhiswaythroughthelaw,likesomegreatengineforcingitselfthroughturbidwater,anddraggedhisusefulfriendinhiswake,likeaboattowedastern.Astheboatsofavouredisusuallyinaroughplight,andmostlyunderwater,so,Sydneyhadaswampedlifeofit.But,easyandstrongcustom,unhappilysomucheasierandstrongerinhimthananystimulatingsenseofdesertordisgrace,madeitthelifehewastolead;andhenomorethoughtofemergingfromhisstateoflion'sjackal,thananyrealjackalmaybesupposedtothinkofrisingtobealion.Stryverwasrich;hadmarriedafloridwidowwithpropertyandthreeboys,whohadnothingparticularlyshiningaboutthembutthestraighthairoftheirdumplingheads.
　　Thesethreeyounggentleman,Mr.Stryver,exudingpatronageofthemostoffensivequalityfromeverypore,hadwalkedbeforehimlikethreesheeptothequietcornerinSoho,andhadofferedaspupilstoLucie'shusband:delicatelysaying,`Halloa!herearethreelumpsofbread-and-cheesetowardsyourmatrimonialpicnic,Darnay!'Thepoliterejectionofthethreelumpsofbread-and-cheesehadquitebloatedMr.Stryverwithindignation,whichheafterwardsturnedtoaccountinthetrainingoftheyounggentlemen,bydirectingthemtobewareoftheprideofBeggars,likethattutor-fellow.HewasalsointhehabitofdeclaimingtoMrs.Stryver,overhisfull-bodiedwine,ontheartsMrs.Darnayhadonceputinpracticeto`catch'him,andonthediamond-cut-diamondartsinhimself,madam,whichhadrenderedhim`nottobecaught.'SomeofhisKing'sBenchfamiliars,whowereoccasionallypartiestothefull-bodiedwineandthelie,excusedhimforthelatterbysayingthathehadtolditsooften,thathebelievedithimself——whichissurelysuchanincorrigibleaggravationofanoriginallybadoffence,astojustifyanysuchoffender'sbeingcarriedofftosomesuitablyretiredspot,andtherehangedoutoftheway.
　　ThesewereamongtheechoestowhichLucie,sometimespensive,sometimesamusedandlaughing,listenedintheechoingcorner,untilherlittledaughterwassixyearsold.Howneartoherhearttheechoesofherchild'streadcame,andthoseofherowndearfather's,alwaysactiveandself-possessed,andthoseofherdearhusband's,neednotbetold.Nor,howthelightestechooftheirunitedhome,directedbyherselfwithsuchawiseandelegantthriftthatitwasmoreabundantthananywaste,wasmusictoher.Nor,howtherewereechoesallabouther,sweetinherears,ofthemanytimesherfatherhadtoldherthathefoundhermoredevotedtohimmarriedifthatcouldbethansingle,andofthemanytimesherhusbandhadsaidtoherthatnocaresanddutiesseemedtodivideherloveforhimorherhelptohim,andaskedher`Whatisthemagicsecret,mydarling,ofyourbeingeverythingtoallofus,asiftherewereonlyoneofus,yetneverseemingtobehurried,ortohavetoomuchtodo?'
　　But,therewereotherechoes,fromadistance,thatrumbledmenacinglyinthecornerallthroughthisspaceoftime.Anditwasnow,aboutlittleLucie'ssixthbirthday,thattheybegantohaveanawfulsound,asofagreatstorminFrancewithadreadfulsearising.
　　Onanightinmid-July,onethousandsevenhundredandeighty-nine,Mr.Lorrycameinlate,fromTellson's,andsathimselfdownbyLucieandherhusbandinthedarkwindow.Itwasahot,wildnight,andtheywereallthreeremindedoftheoldSundaynightwhentheyhadlookedatthelightningfromthesameplace.
　　`Ibegantothink,'saidMr.Lorry,pushinghisbrownwigback,`thatIshouldhavetopassthenightatTellson's.Wehavebeensofullofbusinessallday,thatwehavenotknownwhattodofirst,orwhichwaytoturn.ThereissuchanuneasinessinParis,thatwehaveactuallyarunofconfidenceuponus!Ourcustomersoverthere,seemnottobeabletoconfidetheirpropertytousfastenough.ThereispositivelyamaniaamongsomeofthemforsendingittoEngland.'
　　`Thathasabadlook,'saidDarnay.
　　`Abadlook,yousay,mydearDarnay?Yes,butwedon'tknowwhatreasonthereisinit.Peoplearesounreasonable!SomeofusatTellson'saregettingold,andwereallycan'tbetroubledoutoftheordinarycoursewithoutdueoccasion.'
　　`Still,'saidDarnay,`youknowhowgloomyandthreateningtheskyis.'
　　`Iknowthat,tobesure,'assentedMr.Lorry,tryingtopersuadehimselfthathissweettemperwassoured,andthathegrumbled,`butIamdeterminedtobepeevishaftermylongday'sbotheration.WhereisManette?'