Thislineofthoughtheabandonedquickly,however;itcoulddonogood.Butwhatcoulddogood,heaskedhimself.Whatcouldhedo?
Withblindingforcecametheanswer:hecoulddonothing.Billycaredforhim.Billyhadsaid"yes."Billyexpectedtobehiswife.Asifhecouldsaytohernow:"Ibegyourpardon,but’twasallamistake._I_didnotaskyoutomarryme."
VeryvaliantlythenWilliamsummonedhiswitsandtriedtoacthispart.Hetoldhimself,too,thatitwouldnotbeahardone;thathelovedBillydearly,andthathewouldtrytomakeherhappy.Hewincedalittleatthisthought,forherememberedsuddenlyhowoldhewas——asifhe,athisage,wereafitmatchforagirloftwenty—one!
AndthenhelookedatBilly.Thegirlwasplainlynervous.Therewasadeepflushonhercheeksandabrilliantsparkleinhereyes.
Shewastalkingrapidly——almostincoherentlyattimes——andhervoicewastremulous.Frequentlittleembarrassedlaughspunctuatedhersentences,andherfingerstoyedwitheverythingthatcamewithinreach.Sometimebeforeshehadsprungtoherfeetandhadturnedontheelectriclights;andwhenshecamebackshehadnottakenheroldpositionatWilliam’sside,buthadseatedherselfinachairnearby.Allofwhich,accordingtoWilliam’seyes,meantthemaidenlyshynessofagirlwhohasjustsaid"yes"tothemansheloves.
Williamwenthomethatnightinadaze.Tohimselfhesaidthathehadgoneoutinsearchofadaughter,andhadcomebackwithawife.
CHAPTERXXXVII
"WILLIAM’SBROTHER"
Itwasdecidedthatforthepresent,theengagementshouldnotbeknownoutsidethefamily.Theweddingwouldnottakeplaceimmediately,Williamsaid,anditwasjustaswelltokeepthemattertothemselvesuntilplanswerealittlemoredefinite.
Themembersofthefamilyweretoldatonce.AuntHannahsaid"Oh,mygriefandconscience!"threetimes,andmademattersscarcelybetterbyaddingapologetically:"Oh,ofcourseit’sallright,it’sallright,only——"Shedidnotfinishhersentence,andWilliam,whohadtoldherthenews,didnotknowwhetherhewouldhavebeenmoreorlesspleasedifshehadfinishedit.
Cyrilreceivedtheinformationmoodily,andlapsedatonceintoafitofabstractionfromwhichherousedhimselfhardlyenoughtoofferperfunctorycongratulationsandbestwishes.
BillywasalittlepuzzledatCyril’sbehavior.ShehadbeensureforsometimethatCyrilhadceasedtocarespeciallyforher,evenifheeverdidfancythathelovedher.Shehadhopedtokeephimforafriend,butoflateshehadbeenforcedtoquestionevenhisfriendliness.Hehad,infact,gonebackalmosttohisoldreserveandtaciturnaloofness.
FromtheWest,inresponsetoWilliam’snewsoftheengagement,cameacordiallypleasednoteinKate’sscrawlinghandwriting.
Kate,indeed,seemedtobetheonlymemberofthefamilywhowasgenuinelydelightedwiththecomingmarriage.AstoBertram——
Bertramappearedtohaveagedyearsinasinglenight,sodrawnandwhitewashisfacethemorningafterWilliamhadtoldhimhisplans.
WilliamhaddreadedmostofalltotellBertram.HewasverysurethatBertramhimselfcaredforBilly;anditwasdoublyhardbecauseinWilliam’sownmindwasastrongconvictionthattheyoungermanwasdecidedlytheoneforher.Realizing,however,thatBertrammustbetold,WilliamchoseatimeforthetellingwhenBertramwassmokinginhisdeninthetwilight,withhisfacehalfhiddenfromsight.
Bertramsaidlittle——verylittle,thatnight;butinthemorninghewentstraighttoBilly.
Billywasshocked.Shehadneverseenthesmiling,self—reliant,debonairBertramlikethis.
"Billy,isthistrue?"hedemanded.ThedullmiseryinhisvoicetoldBillythatheknewtheanswerbeforeheaskedthequestion.
"Yes,yes;but,Bertram,please——pleasedon’ttakeitlikethis!"
sheimplored.
"Howwouldyouhavemetakeit?"
"Why,just——justsensibly.YouknowItoldyouthat——thattheothernevercouldbe——never."
"IknowYOUsaidso;butI——believedotherwise."
"ButItoldyou——Ididnotloveyou——thatway."
Bertramwinced.Herosetohisfeetabruptly.
"Iknowyoudid,Billy.I’mafool,ofcourse,tothinkthatI
couldever——changeit.Ishouldn’thavecomehere,either,thismorning.ButI——hadto.Good—by!"Hisface,asheheldouthishand,wastragicwithrenunciation.
"Why,Bertram,youaren’tgoing——now——likethis!"criedthegirl.
"You’vejustcome!"
Themanturnedalmostimpatiently.
"AnddoyouthinkIcanstay——likethis?Billy,won’tyousaygood—by?"heaskedinasoftervoice,againwithoutstretchedhand.
Billyshookherhead.Sheignoredthehand,andresolutelybackedaway.
"No,notlikethat.Youareangrywithme,"shegrieved.
"Besides,youmakeitsoundasif——ifyouweregoingaway."
"Iamgoingaway."
"Bertram!"TherewasterroraswellasdismayinBilly’svoice.
Againthemanturnedsharply.
"Billy,whyareyoumakingthisthingsohardforme?"heaskedindespair."Can’tyouseethatImustgo?"
"Indeed,Ican’t.Andyoumustn’tgo,either.Thereisn’tanyreasonwhyyoushould,"urgedBilly,talkingveryfast,andworkingherfingersnervously."Thingsarejustthesameastheywerebefore——foryou.I’mjustgoingtomarryWilliam,butIwasn’tevergoingtomarryyou,sothatdoesn’tchangethingsanyforyou.
Don’tyousee?Why,Bertram,youmustn’tgoaway!Therewon’tbeanybodyleft.Cyril’sgoingnextweek,youknow;andifyougotherewon’tbeanybodyleftbutWilliamandme.Bertram,youmustn’tgo;don’tyousee?Ishouldfeellostwithout——you!"
Billywasalmostcryingnow.
Bertramlookedupquickly.Anoddchangehadcometohisface.
ForamomenthegazedsilentlyintoBilly’sagitatedcountenance;
thenheaskedinalowvoice:
"Billy,didyouthinkthatafteryouandWilliamweremarriedI
shouldstillcontinuetoliveat——theStrata?"
"Why,ofcourseyouwill!"criedthegirl,indignantly."Why,Bertram,you’llbemybrotherthen——myrealbrother;andoneoftheverychiefestthingsI’manticipatingwhenIgotheretoliveisthegoodtimesyouandIwillhavetogetherwhenI’mWilliam’swife!"
Bertramdrewinhisbreathaudibly,andcaughthislowerlipbetweenhisteeth.Withanabruptmovementheturnedhisbackandwalkedtothewindow.Forafullminutehestayedthere,watchedbytheamazed,displeasedeyesofthegirl.WhenhecamebackhesatdownquietlyinthechairfacingBilly.Hiscountenancewasgraveandhiseyeswerealittletroubled;butthehaggardlookofmiserywasquitegone.
"Billy,"hebegangently,"youmustforgivemysayingthis,but——
areyouquitesureyou——loveWilliam?"
Billyflushedwithanger.
"Youhavenorighttoasksuchaquestion.OfcourseIloveWilliam."
"Ofcourseyoudo——weallloveWilliam.Williamis,infact,amostlovableman.ButWilliam’swifeshould,perhaps,lovehimalittledifferentlyfrom——allofus."
"Andshewill,certainly,"retortedthegirl,withaquickliftingofherchin."Bertram,Idon’tthinkyouhaveanyrightto——tomakesuchinsinuations."
"AndIwon’tmakethemanymore,"repliedBertram,gravely."I
justwantedyoutomakesurethatyou——knew."
"Ishallmakesure,andIshallknow,"saidBilly,firmly——sofirmlythatitsoundedalmostasifsheweretryingtoconvinceherselfaswellasothers.
Therewasalongpause,thenthemanaskeddiffidently:
"Andsoyouareverysurethat——thatyouwantmeto——stay?"
"IndeedIdo!Besides,——don’tyouremember?——thereareallmypeopletobeentertained.Theymustbetakentoplaces,andgivenmotorridesandpicnics.Youtoldmelastweekthatyou’dlovetohelpme;but,ofcourse,ifyoudon’twantto——"
"ButIdowantto,"criedBertram,heartily,agleamoftheoldcheerfulnessspringingtohiseyes."I’mdyingto!"
Thegirllookedupwithquickdistrust.Foramomentsheeyedhimwithbentbrows.Tohermindhehadgonebacktohisoldairy,hopefullight—heartedness.Hewasoncemore"onlyBertram."Shehesitated,thensaidwithsterndecision:
"Bertram,youknowIwantyou,andyoumustknowthatI’mdelightedtohaveyoudropthissillynotionofgoingaway.Butifthisquickchangemeansthatyouarestayingwithanyideathat——that_I_shallchange,then——thenyoumustgo.ButifyouwillstayasWILLIAM’SBROTHERthen——I’llbemorethangladtohaveyou."
"I’llstay——asWilliam’sbrother,"agreedBertram;andBillydidnotnoticethequickindrawingofhisbreathnorthecloseshuttingofhislipsafterthewordswerespoken.
CHAPTERXXXVIII
THEENGAGEMENTOFTWO
BythemiddleofJulytheroutineofBilly’sdayswaswellestablished.Mariehadbeenforaweekawelcomeadditiontothefamily,andshewasprovingtobeofinvaluableaidinentertainingBilly’sguests.Theoverworkedwidowandthelittlelodging—housekeeperfromtheWestEndwereenjoyingBilly’shospitalitynow;andjusttolookattheirbeamingcountenanceswasaninspiration,Billysaid.
Cyrilhadgoneabroad.AuntHannahwasspendingaweekattheNorthShorewithfriends.Bertram,truetohispromise,wasplayingthegallanttoBilly’sguests;andsoassiduouswasheinhisattentionsthatBillyatlastremonstratedwithhim.
"ButIdidn’tmeanthemtotakeALLyourtime,"sheprotested.
"Don’ttheylikeit?Dotheyseetoomuchofme?"hedemanded.
"No,no!Theyloveit,ofcourse.Youmustknowthat.Nobodyelsecouldgivesuchbeautifultimesasyou’vegivenus.Butit’syourselfI’mthinkingof.You’regivingupallyourtime.
Besides,Ididn’tmeantokeepyouhereallsummer,ofcourse.Youalwaysgoawaysome,youknow,foravacation."
"ButI’mhavingavacationhere,doingthis,"laughedBertram.
"I’msureI’mgettingseaairdowntothebeachesandmountainairouttotheBlueHills.Andasforexcitement——ifyoucanfindanythingmorewildlyexcitingthanitwasyesterdaywhenMissMarieandItookthewidowandthespinsterladyontheRoller—coaster——
justshowittome;that’sall!"
Billylaughed.
"Theytoldmeaboutit——Marieinparticular.Shesaidyouwerelovelytothem,andletthemdoeverysinglethingtheywantedto;
andthathalfanhouraftertheygottheretheywereliketwochildrenletoutofschool.Dearme,IwishI’dgone.IneverstayathomethatIdon’tmisssomething,"shefinishedregretfully.
Bertramshruggedhisshoulders.
"Ifit’sRoller—coastersandChute—the—chutesthatyouwant,I
fancyyou’llgetenoughbeforetheweekisout,"hesighedlaughingly."Theysaidthey’dliketogothereto—morrow,please,whenIaskedthemwhatweshoulddonext.Whatsurprisesmeisthattheylikesuchthings——suchhair—raisingthings.WhenIfirstsawthem,black—gownedandstiff—backed,sittinginyourlittleroomhere,IthoughtIshouldneverdareofferthemanythingmorewildlyexcitingthanachurchserviceoralectureonpsychology,withperhapsabandconcerthintedat,providedthebandcouldbeproperlyinstructedbeforehandastotempoandselections.Butnow——really,Billy,whydoyousupposetheyhavetakensuchafancytothesekiddishstunts——thosetwostaidwomen?"
Billylaughed,buthereyessoftened.
"Idon’tknowunlessit’sbecausealltheirlivesthey’vebeentiedtosuchdeadmonotonythatjusttheexhilarationofmotionisblisstothem.Butyouwon’talwayshavetoriskyourneckandyourtemperinthisfashion,Bertram.NextweekmylittlecouplefromSouthBostoncomes.Sheadorespicturesandstuffedanimals.
You’llhavetodothemuseumswithher.Thenthere’slittlecrippledTommy——he’llbeperfectlycontentedifyou’llputhimdownwherehecanhearthebandplay.Andallyou’llhavetodowhenthatonestopsistopilothimtothenextone.ThisISgoodofyou,Bertram,andIdothankyouforit,"finishedBilly,fervently,justasMarie,thewidow,andthe"spinsterlady"enteredtheroom.
Billytoldherselfthesedaysthatshewasveryhappy——veryhappyindeed.Wasshenotengagedtoagoodman,anddidshenotalsohaveitinherpowertomakethelongsummerdaysapleasuretomanypeople?Thefactthatshehadtotellherselfthatshewashappyinordertoconvinceherselfthatshewasso,didnotoccurtoBilly——yet.
NotlongafterMariearrived,Billytoldheroftheengagement.
Williamwasatthehouseveryfrequently,andowingtotheintimacyofMarie’srelationshipwiththefamilyBillydecidedtotellherhowmattersstood.Marie’sreceptionofthenewswassomewhatsurprising.Firstshelookedfrightened.
"ToWilliam?——youareengagedtoWilliam?"
"Why——yes."
"ButIthought——surelyitwas——don’tyoumean——Mr.Cyril?"
"No,Idon’t,"laughedBilly."AndcertainlyIoughttoknow."
"Andyoudon’t——careforhim?"
"Ihopenot——ifI’mgoingtomarryWilliam."
SolightwasBilly’svoiceandmannerthatMariedaredonemorequestion.
"Andhe——doesn’tcare——foryou?"
"Ihopenot——ifWilliamisgoingtomarryme,"laughedBillyagain.
"Oh—h!"breathedMarie,withanoddintonationofrelief."ThenI’mglad——soglad!AndIhopeyou’llbevery,veryhappy,dear."
BillylookedintoMarie’sglowingfaceandwaspleased:thereseemedtobesofew,soveryfewfacesintowhichshehadlookedandfoundentireapprobationofherengagementtoWilliam.
BillysawagreatdealofWilliamnow.Hewasalwayskindandconsiderate,andhetriedtohelpherentertainherguests;butBilly,gratefulasshewastohimforhisefforts,wasrelievedwhenheresignedhisplacetoBertram.Bertramdid,indeed,knowsomuchbetterhowtodoit.Williamtriedtohelpher,too,abouttraininghervinesandrosebushes;butofcourse,eveninthis,hecouldnotbeexpectedtoshowquitetheinterestthatBertrammanifestedineverygreenshootandopeningbud,forhehadnothelpedherplantthem,asBertramhad.
Billywasalittletroubledsometimes,thatshedidnotfeelmoreateasewithWilliam.Shethoughtitnaturalthatsheshouldfeelalittlediffidentwithhim,inthefaceofhissuddenchangefroman"uncle"toanacceptedlover;butshedidnotseewhysheshouldbeafraidofhim——yetshewas.Sheownedthattoherselfunhappily.
Andhewassogood!——sheownedthat,too.Heseemednottohaveathoughtintheworldbutforhercomfortandhappiness;andtherewasnoendtothetactfullittlethingshewasalwaysdoingforherpleasure.Heseemed,also,tohavedivinedthatshedidnotliketobekissedandcaressed;andonlyoccasionallydidhekissher,andthenitwasmerelyasortoffatherlysaluteonherforehead——forwhichconsiderationBillywasgrateful:Billydecidedthatshewouldnotliketobekissedonthelips.
AftersomedaysofpuzzlingoverthematterBillyconcludedthatitwasself—consciousnessthatcausedallthetrouble.WithWilliamshewasself—conscious.IfshecouldonlyforgetthatshewassomedaytobeWilliam’swife,theolddelightfulcomradeshipwouldreturn,andshewouldbeateaseagainwithhim.Intime,aftershehadbecomeaccustomedtotheideaofmarriage,itwouldnotsoconfuseher,ofcourse.Shelovedhimdearly,andshewantedtomakehimhappy;butforthepresent——justwhileshewas"gettingusedtothings"——shewouldtrytoforget,sometimes,thatshewasgoingtobeWilliam’swife.
Billywashappiernow.Shewasalwayshappieraftershehadthoughtthingsouttoherownsatisfaction.Sheturnedwithnewzesttotheentertainmentofherguests;andwithBertramsheplannedmanydelightfultripsfortheirpleasure.Bertramwasagreatcomforttoherthesedays.Never,inwordorlook,couldsheseethatheoversteppedtherolewhichhehadpromisedtoplay——
William’sbrother.
Billywentbacktohermusic,too.Anewmelodywasrunningthroughherhead,andshelongedtoputitonpaper.Alreadyherfirstlittle"GroupofSongs"hadfoundfriends,andBilly,toaverymodestextent,wasbeginningtotastethesweetsoffame.
Thus,byalltheseinterests,didBillytry"togetusedtothings."
CHAPTERXXXIX
ALITTLEPIECEOFPAPER
OfallBilly’sguests,Mariewasveryplainlythehappiest.Shewasapermanentguest,itistrue,whiletheotherscameforonlyaweekortwoatatime;butitwasnotthis,Billydecided,thathadbroughtsobrilliantasparkletoMarie’seyes,sojoyousalaughtoherlips.Thejoyousnesswasallthemorenoticeable,becauseheretoforeMarie,whileverysweet,hadbeenalsosad.Herbigblueeyeshadalwayscarriedahauntingshadow,andherstephadlackedthespringbelongingtoyouthandhappiness.Certainly,Billyhadneverseenherlikethisbefore.
"Verily,Marie,"sheteasedoneday,"haveyoufoundanexhaustlesssupplyofstockingstomend,oranever—donepuddingtomake——
which?"
"Why?Whatdoyoumean?"
"Oh,nothing.Iwasonlywonderingjustwhathadbroughtthatnewlighttoyoureyes."
"Isthereanewlight?"
"Therecertainlyis."
"ItmustbebecauseI’msohappy,then,"sighedMarie;"becauseyou’resogoodtome."
"Isthatall?"
"Isn’tthatenough?"Marie’stonewasevasive.
"No."Billyshookherheadmischievously."Marie,whatisit?"
"It’snothing——really,it’snothing,"protestedMarie,hurryingoutoftheroomwithanervouslaugh.
Billyfrowned.Shewassuspiciousbefore;shewassurenow.Inlessthantwelvehours’timecameheropportunity.ShewasaloneagainwithMarie.
"Marie,whoishe?"sheaskedabruptly.
"He?Who?"
"Themanwhoistowearthestockingsandeatthepudding."
Thelittlemusicteacherflushedveryred,butshemanagedtodisplaysomethingthatmightpassforsurprise.
"BILLY!"
"Come,dear,"coaxedBilly,winningly."Tellmeaboutit.I’msointerested!"
"Butthereisn’tanythingtotell——reallythereisn’t."
"Whoishe?"
"Heisn’tanybody——thatis,hedoesn’tknowhe’sanybody,"amendedMarie.
Billylaughedsoftly.
"Oh,doesn’the!Hasn’theevershown——thathecared?"
"No;thatis——perhapshehas,onlyIthoughtthen——thatitwas——
anothergirl."
"Anothergirl!Sothere’sanothergirlinthecase?"
"Yes.Imean,no,"correctedMarie,suddenlybeginningtorealizewhatshewassaying."Really,itwasn’tanything——itisn’tanything!"sheprotested.
"Hm—m,"murmuredBilly,archly."Oh,I’mgettingonsome!Hedidshow,once,thathecared;butyouthoughtitwasanothergirl,andyoucoldlylookedtheotherway.Now,thereISN’Tanyothergirl,youfind,and——Marie,tellmetherest!"
Marieshookherheademphatically,andpulledherselfgentlyawayfromBilly’sgrasp.
"No,no,please!"shebegged."Itreallyisn’tanything.I’msureI’mimaginingitall!"shecried,assheranaway.
Duringthedaysthatfollowed,BillyspeculatednotalittleonMarie’shalf—toldstory,andwonderedinterestedlywhothemanmightbe.ShequestionedMarieonceagain,butthegirlwouldtellnothingmore;and,indeed,Billywassooccupiedwithherownperplexitiesthatshehadlittletimeforthoseofotherpeople.
ToherselfBillywasforcedtoownthatshewasnot"gettingusedtothings."Shewasstillself—consciouswithWilliam;shecouldnotforgetthatshewasonedaytobehiswife.Shecouldnotbringbackthedearoldfreedomofcomradeshipwithhim.
Billywasalarmednow.Shehadbeguntoaskherselfsearchingquestions.Whatshouldshedoifnever,nevershouldshegetusedtotheideaofmarryingWilliam?Howcouldshemarryhimifhewasstill"UncleWilliam,"andneverherdearloverinhereyes?Whyhadshenotbeenwiseenoughandbraveenoughtotellhiminthefirstplacethatshewasnotatallsurethatshelovedhim,butthatshewouldtrytodoso?Thenwhenshehadtried——asshehadnow——andfailed,shecouldhavetoldhimhonestlythetruth,anditwouldnothavebeensogreatashocktohimasitmustbenow,ifsheshouldtellhim.
Billyhadremorsefullycometotheconclusionthatshecouldneverloveanymanwellenoughtomarryhim,whenonedaysosmallathingasapieceofpaperflutteredintohervision,andshowedherthefallacyofthatidea.
Itwasahalf—sheetofnotepaper,anditblewfromMarie’sbalconytothelawnbelow.Billyfoundittherelater,andasshepickedituphereyesfellonasinglenameinMarie’shandwritinginscribedhalfadozentimesasifthewriterhadmusinglyaccompaniedherthoughtswithherpen;andthenamewas,"MarieHenshaw."
ForamomentBillystaredatthenameperplexedly——theninaflashcametheremembranceofMarie’swords;andBillybreathed:
"Henshaw!——theman——BERTRAM!"
Billydroppedthepaperthenandfled.Inherownroom,behindlockeddoors,shesatdowntothink.
Bertram!ItwasheforwhomMariecared——HERBertram!AndthenitcametoBillywithstaggeringforcethathewasnotHERBertramatall.HenevercouldbeherBertramnow.Hewas——Marie’s.
Billywasfrightenedthen,sofiercewasthisstrangenewsomethingthatrosewithinher——thisoverpoweringsomethingthatseemedtoblotoutalltheworld,andleaveonly——Bertram.Sheknewthen,thatithadalwaysbeenBertramtowhomshehadturned,thoughshehadbeenblindtothecauseofthatturning.Alwaysherplanshadincludedhim.Alwaysshehadbeenthehappiestinhispresence;
neverhadshepicturedhimanywhereelsebutatherside.
Certainlyneverhadshepicturedhimasthedevotedloverofanotherwoman!Andshehadnotknownwhatitallmeant——
poorblindchildthatshewas!
VeryresolutelynowBillysetherselftolookingmatterssquarelyintheface.Sheunderstooditquitewell.AllsummerMarieandBertramhadbeenthrowntogether.NowonderMariehadfalleninlovewithBertram,andthathe——BillythoughtshecomprehendednowwhyBertramhadfounditsoeasyforthelastfewweekstobeWilliam’sbrother.She,ofcourse,hadbeenthe"othergirl"whomMariehadoncefearedthatthemanloved.Itwasallsoclear——sowoefullyclear!
WithanachingheartBillyaskedherselfwhatnowwastobedone.
Forherself,turnwhicheverwayshecould,shecouldseenothingbutunhappiness.Shedetermined,therefore,withSpartanfortitude,thattonooneelsewouldshebringequalunhappiness.
Shewouldbesilent.BertramandMarielovedeachother.Thatmatterwassettled.AstoWilliam——BillythoughtofthestoryWilliamhadtoldherofhislonelylife,——ofthepleahehadmadetoher;andherheartached.Whateverhappened,Williammustbemadehappy.Williammustnotbetold.HerpromisetoWilliammustbekept.
CHAPTERXL
WILLIAMPAYSAVISIT
BeforeSeptemberpassedallBilly’sfriendssaidthathersummer’sself—appointedtaskhadbeentoohardforher.Innootherwaycouldtheyaccountforthesadchangethathadcometoher.
UndeniablyBillylookedreallyill.Alwaysslender,shewasshadow—likenow.Hereyeshadfoundagainthewistfulappealofhergirlhood,onlynowtheycarriedsomethingthatwasalmostfear,aswell.Therose—flushhadgonefromhercheeks,andpatheticlittlehollowshadappeared,makingtheroundyoungchinbelowlookalmostpointed.CertainlyBillydidseemtobeill.
LateinSeptemberWilliamwentWestonbusiness.Incidentallyhecalledtoseehissister,Kate.
"Well,andhowiseverybody?"askedKate,cheerily,afterthegreetingswereover.
Williamsighed.
"Well,’everybody,’tome,Kate,isprettybadlyoff.We’reworriedaboutBilly."
"Billy!Youdon’tmeanshe’ssick?Why,she’salwaysbeenthepictureofhealth!"
"Iknowshehas;butsheisn’tnow."
"What’sthetrouble?"
"That’swhatwedon’tknow."
"You’vehadthedoctor?"
"Ofcourse;twoorthreeofthem——thoughmuchagainstBilly’swill.
But——theydidn’thelpus."
"Whatdidtheysay?"
"Theycouldfindnothingexceptperhapsalittletemporarystomachtrouble,orsomethingofthatkind,whichtheyallagreedwasnojustcauseforherpresentcondition."
"Butwhatdidtheysayitwas?"
"Why,theysaiditseemedlikenervousness,orasifsomethingwastroublingher.Theyaskedifsheweren’tundersomesortofstrain."
"Well,isshe?Doesanythingtroubleher?"
"NotthatIknowof.Anyhow,ifthereisanything,noneofuscanfindoutwhatitis."
Katefrowned.Shethrewaquicklookintoherbrother’sface.
"William,"shebeganhesitatingly,"forgiveme,but——Billyisquitehappyin——herengagement,Isuppose."
Themanflushedpainfully,andsighed.
"I’vethoughtofthat,ofcourse.Infact,itwasthefirstthingIdidthinkof.Ievenbegantowatchherratherclosely,andonceI——questionedheralittle."
"Whatdidshesay?"
"SheseemedsofrightenedanddistressedthatIdidn’tsaymuchmyself.Icouldn’t.Ihadbutjustbegunwhenhereyesfilledwithtears,andsheaskedmeinafrightenedlittlevoiceifshehaddoneanythingtodispleaseme,anythingtomakemeunhappy;andsheseemedsoanxiousandgrievedanddismayedthatIshouldevenquestionher,thatIhadtostop."
"Whathasshedonethissummer?Wherehasshebeen?"
"Shehasn’tbeenanywhere.Didn’tIwriteyou?She’skeptopenhouseforalotofherlessfortunatefriends——asortofvacationhome,youknow;and——andImustsayshe’sgiventhemaworldofhappiness,too."
"Butwasn’tthathardforher?"
"Itdidn’tseemtobe.Sheappearedtoenjoyitimmensely,particularlyatfirst.Ofcourseshehadplentyofhelp,andthatwonderfullittleMissHawthornhasbeenahostinherself.They’reallgonenow,anyway,exceptMissHawthorn."
"ButBillymusthavehadthecareandtheexcitement."
"Perhaps——toacertainextent.Thoughnotmuch,afterall.YouseeBertram,too,hasgivenuphissummertothem,andhasbeenplayingthedevotedescorttothewholebunch.Indeed,forthelastfewweeksofit,sinceBillybegantoseemsoill,heandMissHawthornhaveschemedtotakeallthecarefromBilly,andtheyhavedonethewholethingtogether."
"ButwhatHASBillydonetomakeherlikethis?"
"Idon’tknow.She’sdonelotsforme,inallsortsofways——
cataloguingmycurios,youknow,andgoingwithmetohuntupthings.Infact,sheseemsthehappiestwhensheISdoingsomethingforme.It’scometobeasortofmaniawithher,I’mafraid——todosomethingforme.Kate,I’mreallyworried.Whatdoyousupposeisthematter?"
Kateshookherhead.Thepuzzledfrownhadcomebacktoherface.
"Ican’timagine,"shebeganslowly."Ofcourse,whenItoldheryoulovedherand——"
"Whenyoutoldherwha—at?"explodedtheusuallylow—voicedWilliam,withsuddensharpness.
"WhenItoldherthatyoulovedher,William.Yousee,I——"
Williamsprangtohisfeet.
"ToldherthatIlovedher!"hecried,aghast."Goodheavens,Kate,doyoumeantosaythatYOUtoldherTHAT."
"Why,y—yes."
"AndmayIaskwhereyougotyourinformation?"
"Why,WilliamHenshaw,whataquestion!Igotitfromyourself,ofcourse,"defendedKate.
"FromME!"William’sfaceexpressedsheeramazement.
"Certainly;onthatdrivewhenIwasEastinJune,"returnedKate,withdignity."YOUevidentlyhaveforgottenit,butIhavenot.
Youtoldmeveryfranklyhowmuchyouthoughtofher,andhowyoulongedtohaveherbacktherewithyou,butthatshedidn’tseemtobereadytocome.Iwassorryforyou,andIwantedtodosomethingtohelp,particularlyasitmighthavebeenmyfault,partly,thatshewentaway,inthefirstplace."
Williamliftedhishead.
"Whatdoyoumean?"
"Why,nothing,onlythatI——Itoldheralittleofhow——howupsettingherarrivalhadbeentoeverything,andofhowmuchyouhaddoneforher,andputyourselfout.Isaiditsoshe’dappreciatethings,ofcourse,butshetookitquitedifferentlyfromwhatIhadintendedsheshouldtakeit,andseemedquitecutupaboutit.Thenshewentawayinthatwily,impulsivefashion."
Williambithislip,buthedidnotspeak.Katewasplungingonfeverishly,andinthefaceofthegreaterrevelationheletthelesseronedrop.
"Andsothat’swhyIwasparticularlyanxioustobringthingsaroundrightagain,"continuedKate."Andthat’swhyIspoke.I
thoughtI’dseenhowthingswere,andonthedriveIsaidso.TheniswhenIadvisedyoutospeaktoBilly;butyoudeclaredthatBillywasn’tready,andthatyoucouldn’tmakeagirlmarryagainstherwill.NOWdon’tyourecollectit?"
AgreatlightofunderstandingbrokeoverWilliam’sface.Hestartedtospeak,butsomethingevidentlystayedthewordsonhislips.Withcontrolleddeliberationheturnedandsatdown.Thenhesaid:
"Kate,willyoukindlytellmejustwhatyouDIDdo?"
"Why,Ididn’tdosoverymuch.Ijusttriedtohelp,that’sall.
AfterItalkedwithyou,andadvisedyoutoaskBillyrightawaytomarryyou,Iwenttoher.Ithoughtshecaredforyoualready,anyway;butIjustwantedtotellherhowverymuchitwastoyou,andsosortofpavetheway.AndnowcomesthepartthatIstartedtotellyoualittlewhileagowhenyoucaughtmeupsosharply.I
wasgoingtosaythatwhenItoldBillythis,sheappearedtobesurprised,andalmostfrightened.Yousee,shehadn’tknownyoucaredforher,afterall,andsoIhadachancetohelpandmakeitplaintoherhowyoudidloveher,sothatwhenyouspokeeverythingwouldbeallright.There,that’sall.YouseeIdidn’tdosoverymuch."
"’Soverymuch’!"groanedWilliam,startingtohisfeet."GreatScott!"
"Why,William,whatdoyoumean?Whereareyougoing?"
"I’mgoing——to——Billy,"retortedWilliamwithslowdistinctness.
"AndI’mgoingtotrytogetthere——before——you——CAN!"Andwiththisextraordinaryshot——forWilliam——heleftthehouse.
WilliamwenttoBillyasfastassteamcouldcarryhim.Hefoundherinherlittledrawing—roomlistlesslywatchingwithAuntHannahthegameofchessthatBertramandMariewereplaying.
"Billy,youpoor,dearchild,comehere,"hesaidabruptly,assoonastheexcitementofhisunexpectedarrivalhadpassed."Iwanttotalktoyou."Andheledthewaytotheverandawhichheknewwouldbesilentanddeserted.
"Totalkto——me?"murmuredBilly,asshewonderinglycametohisside,astartledquestioninginherwidedarkeyes.
CHAPTERXLI
THECROOKEDMADESTRAIGHT
Williamdidnotre—enterthehouseafterhistalkwithBillyontheveranda.
"Iwillgodownthestepsandaroundbytherosegardentothestreet,dear,"hesaid."I’drathernotgoinnow.Justmakemyadieus,please,andsaythatIcouldn’tstayanylonger.Andnow——
good—by."Hiseyesastheylookeddownather,weremoistandverytender.Hislipstrembledalittle,buttheysmiled,andtherewasalookofnew—bornpeaceandjoyonhisface.
Billy,too,wassmiling,thoughwistfully.Thefrightenedquestioninghadgonefromhereyes,leavingonlyinfinitetenderness.
"Youaresureit——itisallright——now?"shestammered.
"Verysure,littlegirl;andit’sthefirsttimeithasbeenrightforweeks.Billy,thatwasverydearofyou,andIloveyouforit;butthinkhownear——howperilouslynearyoucametolifelongmisery!"
"ButIthought——youwantedme——somuch,"shesmiledshyly.
"AndIdid,andIdo——foradaughter.Youdon’tdoubtthatNOW?"
"No,oh,no,"laughedBilly,softly;andtoherfacecameahappylookofreliefasshefinished:"AndI’llbesogladtobe——thedaughter!"
Forsomeminutesafterthemanhadgone,Billystoodbythestepswherehehadlefther.ShewasstilltherewhenBertramcametotheverandadoorandspoketoher.
"Billy,IsawWilliamgobythewindow,soIknewyouwerealone.
MayIspeaktoyou?"
Thegirlturnedwithastart.
"Why,ofcourse!Whatisit?——butIthoughtyouwereplaying.
WhereisMarie?"
"Thegameisfinished;besides——Billy,whyareyoualwaysaskingmelatelywhereMarieis,asifIwereherkeeper,orshemine?"hedemanded,withatouchofnervousirritation.
"Why,nothing,Bertram,"smiledBilly,alittlewearily;"onlythatyouwereplayingtogetherafewminutesago,andIwonderedwhereshehadgone."
"’Afewminutesago’!"echoedBertramwithsuddenbitterness.
"Evidentlythetimepassedswiftlywithyou,Billy.WilliamwasouthereMOREthananhour."
"Why——Bertram!"
"Yes,Iknow.I’venobusinesstosaythat,ofcourse,"sighedtheman;"but,Billy,that’swhyIcameout——becauseImustspeaktoyouthisonce.Won’tyoucomeandsitdown,please?"heimploreddespairingly.
"Why,Bertram,"murmuredBillyagain,faintly,assheturnedtowardthevine—shadedcornerandsatdown.Hereyeswerestartled.A
swiftcolorhadcometohercheeks.
"Billy,"begantheman,inasternlycontrolledvoice,"pleaseletmespeakthisonce,anddon’ttrytostopme.Youmaythink,foramoment,thatit’sdisloyaltoWilliamifyoulisten;butitisn’t.
There’sthismuchduetome——thatyouletmespeaknow.Billy,I
can’tstandit.I’vetried,butit’snouse.I’vegottogoaway,andit’srightthatIshould.I’mnottheonlyonethatthinksso,either.Mariedoes,too."
"MARIE!"
"Yes.Italkeditalloverwithher.She’sknownforalongtimehowit’sbeenwithme;howIcared——foryou."
"Marie!You’vetoldMariethat?"gaspedBilly.
"Yes.Surelyyoudon’tmindMarie’sknowing,"wentonBertram,dejectedly."Andshe’sbeensogoodtome,andtriedto——helpme."
BertramwasnotlookingatBillynow.Ifhehadbeenhewouldhaveseentheincredulousjoycomeintoherface.Hiseyesweremoodilyfixedonthefloor.
"Andso,Billy,I’vecometotellyou.I’mgoingaway,"hecontinued,afteramoment."I’vegottogo.Ithoughtonce,whenIfirsttalkedwithyouofWilliam,thatyoudidn’tknowyourownheart;thatyoudidn’treallycareforhim.Iwasevenfoolenoughtothinkthat——thatitwouldbeItowhomyou’dturn——someday.
AndsoIstayed.ButIstayedhonorably,Billy!YOUknowthat!
YouknowthatIhaven’tonceforgotten——notonce,thatIwasonlyWilliam’sbrother.IpromisedyouI’dbethat——andIhavebeen;
haven’tI?"
Billynoddedsilently.Herfacewasturnedaway.
"But,Billy,Ican’tdoitanylonger.I’vegottoaskformypromiseback,andthen,ofcourse,Ican’tstay."
"Butyou——youdon’thavetogo——away,"murmuredthegirl,faintly.
Bertramsprangtohisfeet.Hisfacewaswhite.
"Billy,"hecried,standingtallandstraightbeforeher,"Billy,I
loveeverytouchofyourhand,everyglanceofyoureye,everywordthatfallsfromyourlips.DoyouthinkIcanstay——now?Iwantmypromiseback!WhenI’mnolongerWilliam’sbrother——thenI’llgo!"
"Butyoudon’thavetohaveitback——thatis,youdon’thavetohaveitatall,"stammeredBilly,flushingadorably.She,too,wasonherfeetnow.
"Billy,whatdoyoumean?"
"Don’tyousee?I——IHAVEturned,"shefalteredbreathlessly,holdingoutbothherhands.
Eventhen,inspiteofthegreatlightthatleapedtohiseyes,Bertramadvancedonlyasinglestep.
"But——William?"hequestioned,unbelievingly.
"ItWASamistake,justasyouthought.Weknownow——bothofus.
Wedon’teitherofuscarefortheother——thatway.And——Bertram,IthinkitHASbeenyou——allthetime,onlyIdidn’tknow!"
"Billy,Billy!"chokedBertraminavoiceshakenwithemotion.Heopenedhisarmsthen,wide——andBillywalkedstraightintothem.
CHAPTERXLII
THE"ENDOFTHESTORY"
ItwastwodaysafterBilly’snewhappinesshadcometoherthatCyrilcamehome.HewentverysoontoseeBilly.
Thegirlwassurprisedatthechangeinhisappearance.Hehadgrownthinandhaggardlooking,andhiseyesweresomber.Hemovedrestlesslyabouttheroomforatime,finallyseatinghimselfatthepianoandlettinghisfingersslipfromonemournfullittlemelodytoanother.Then,withadiscordantcrash,heturned.
"Billy,doyouthinkanygirlwouldmarry——me?"hedemanded.
"Why,Cyril!"
"There,now,pleasedon’tbeginthat,"hebeggedfretfully."I
realize,ofcourse,thatI’maveryunlikelysubjectformatrimony.
Youmademeunderstandthatclearlyenoughlastwinter!"
"Last——winter?"
Cyrilraisedhiseyebrows.
"Oh,Icametoyouforalittleencouragement,andtomakeaconfession,"hesaid."Imadetheconfession——butIdidn’tgettheencouragement."
Billychangedcolor.Shethoughtsheknewwhathemeant,butatthesametimeshecouldn’tunderstandwhyheshouldwishtorefertothatconversationnow.
"A——confession?"sherepeated,hesitatingly.
"Yes.ItoldyouthatI’dbeguntodoubtmybeingsuchawoman—
hater,afterall.IintimatedthatYOU’Dbegunthesofteningprocess,andthatthenI’dfoundacertainotheryoungwomanwhohad——well,whohadkeptupthegoodwork."
"Oh!"criedBillysuddenly,withapeculiarintonation."Oh—h!"
Thenshelaughedsoftly.
"Well,thatwastheconfession,"resumedCyril."ThenIcameoutflat—footedandsaidthatIwantedtomarryher——butthereiswhereIdidn’tgettheencouragement!"
"Indeed!I’mafraidIwasn’tveryconsiderate,"stammeredBilly.
"No,youweren’t,"agreedCyril,moodily."Ididn’tknowbutnow——"
hisvoicesoftenedalittle——"withthisnewhappinessofyoursandBertram’sthat——youmightfindalittleencouragementforme."
"AndIwill,"criedBilly,promptly."Tellmeabouther."
"Idid——lastwinter,"reproachedtheman,"andyouweresureIwasdeceivingmyself.YoudrewthegloomiestsortofpictureofthemiseryIwouldtakewithawife."
"Idid?"Billywaslaughingverymerrilynow.
"Yes.Yousaidshe’dalwaysbetalkingandlaughingwhenIwantedtobequiet,andthatshe’dwanttodragmeouttopartiesandplayswhenIwantedtostayathome;and——oh,lotsofthings.I
triedtomakeitcleartoyouthat——thatthislittlewomanwasn’tthatsort.ButIcouldn’t,"finishedCyril,gloomily.
"Butofcoursesheisn’t,"declaredBilly,withquicksympathy.
"I——Ididn’tknow——WHAT——Iwas——talkingabout,"sheaddedwithemphaticdistinctness.ThenshesmiledtothinkhowlittleCyrilknewhowverytruethosewordswere."Tellmeabouther,"shebeggedagain."Iknowshemustbeverylovelyandbrilliant,andofcourseawonderfulmusician.YOUcouldn’tchooseanyoneelse!"
TohersurpriseCyrilturnedabruptlyandbegantoplayagain.A
nervouslittlestaccatoscherzofellfromhisfingers,butitdroppedalmostatonceintoaquietermelody,andendedwithsomethingthatsoundedverymuchlikethelaststrainof"Home,SweetHome."Thenhewheeledaboutonthepianostool.
"Billy,that’sexactlywhereyou’rewrong——IDON’Twantthatkindofwife.Idon’twantabrilliantone,and——now,Billy,thissoundslikehorribleheresy,Iknow,butit’strue——Idon’tcarewhethershecanplay,ornot;butIshouldpreferthatsheshouldn’tplay——much!"
"Why,CyrilHenshaw!——andyou,withyourmusic!Asifyoucouldbecontentedwithawomanlikethat!"
"Oh,Iwanthertolikemusic,ofcourse,"modifiedCyril;"butI
don’tcaretohaveherMAKEit.Billy,doyouknow?You’lllaugh,ofcourse,butmypictureofawifeisalwaysonething:aroomwithatableandashadedlamp,andalittlewomanbesideitwiththelightonherhair,andagreat,basketofsewingbesideher.
YouseeIAMdomestic!"hefinishedalittledefiantly.
"Ishouldsayyouwere,"laughedBilly."Andhaveyoufoundher?——
thislittlewomanwhoistodonothingbutsitandsewinthecircleoftheshadedlamp?"
"Yes,I’vefoundher,butI’mnotatallsureshe’sfoundme.
That’swhereIwantyourhelp.Oh,Idon’tmean,ofcourse,"headded,"thatshe’sgottositunderthatlampallthetime.It’sonlythat——thatIhopeshelikesthatsortofthing."
"And——doesshe?"
"Yes;thatis,Ithinkshedoes,"smiledCyril."Anyhow,shetoldmeoncethat——thatthethingsshelikedbesttodoinalltheworldweretomendstockingsandtomakepuddings."
Billysprangtoherfeetwithalittlecry.Now,indeed,hadCyrilkepthispromiseandmade"manythingsclear"toher.
"Cyril,comehere,"shecriedtremulously,leadingthewaytotheopenverandadoor.ThenextmomentCyrilwaslookingacrossthelawntothelittlesummerhouseinthemidstofBilly’srosegarden.
InfullviewwithinthesummerhousesatMarie——sewing.
"Go,Cyril;she’swaitingforyou,"smiledBilly,mistily."Thelight’sonlythesun,tobesure,andmaybethereisn’tawholebasketofsewingthere.But——SHE’Sthere!"
"You’ve——guessed,then!"breathedCyril.
"I’venotguessed——Iknow.And——it’sallright."
"Youmean——?"OnlyCyril’spleadingeyesfinishedthequestion.
"Yes,I’msureshedoes,"noddedBilly.Andthensheaddedunderherbreathasthemanpassedswiftlydownthesteps:"’MarieHenshaw’indeed!So’twasCyrilallthetime——andneverBertram——
whowastheinspirationofthatbitofpapergive—away!"
WhensheturnedbackintotheroomshecamefacetofacewithBertram.
"Ispoke,dear,butyoudidn’thear,"hesaid,ashehurriedforwardwithoutstretchedhands.
"Bertram,"greetedBilly,withsurprisingirrelevance,"’andtheyalllivedhappilyeverafter’——theyDID!Isn’tthatalwaystheendingtothestory——alovestory?"
"Ofcourse,"saidBertramwithemphasis;——"OURlovestory!"
"Andtheirs,"supplementedBilly,softly;butBertramdidnothearthat.
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