首页 >出版文学> Miss Billy>第5章

第5章

  Billywasrelieved.Sheconcludedthat,afterall,Bertramwasgoingtobesensible.Shedecidedthatshe,too,wouldbesensible.Shewouldaccepthimonthis,hischosenplane,andshewouldthinknomoreofhis"nonsense."
  Billythrewherselfthenevenmoreenthusiasticallyintoherbelovedwork.ShetoldMariethatafterallwassaidanddone,therecouldnotbeanymanthatwouldtipthescalesoneinchwithmusicontheotherside.Shewasalittlehurt,itistrue,whenMarieonlylaughedandanswered:
  "Butwhatifthemanandthemusicbothhappentobeonthesameside,mydear;whatthen?"
  Marie’svoicewaswistful,inspiteofthelaugh——sowistfulthatitremindedBillyoftheirconversationafewweeksbefore.
  "Butitisyou,Marie,whowantthestockingstodarnandthepuddingstomake,"sheretortedplayfully."NotI!And,doyouknow?IbelieveIshallturnmatchmakeryet,andfindyouaman;
  andthechiefestofhisqualificationsshallbethathe’swretchedlyhardonhishose,andthatheadorespuddings."
  "No,no,MissBilly,don’t,please!"beggedtheother,inquickterror."ForgetallIsaidtheotherday;pleasedo!Don’ttell——
  anybody!"
  ShewassoobviouslydistressedandfrightenedthatBillywaspuzzled.
  "There,there,’twasonlyajest,ofcourse,"shesoothedher.
  "But,reallyMarie,itisthedear,domesticlittlemouselikeyourselfthatoughttobesomebody’swife——andthat’sthekindmenarelookingfor,too."
  Mariegaveaslowshakeofherhead.
  "Notthekindofmanthatissomebody,thatdoessomething,"sheobjected;"andthat’stheonlykindIcould——love.HEwantsawifethatisbeautifulandclever,thatcandothingslikehimself——LIKE
  HIMSELF!"sheiteratedfeverishly.
  Billyopenedwidehereyes.
  "Why,Marie,onewouldthink——youalreadyknew——suchaman,"shecried.
  Thelittlemusicteacherchangedherposition,andturnedhereyesaway.
  "Ido,ofcourse,"sheretortedinamerryvoice,"lotsofthem.
  Don’tyou?Come,we’vediscussedmymatrimonialprospectsquitelongenough,"shewentonlightly."Youknowwestartedwithyours.Supposewegobacktothose."
  "ButIhaven’tany,"demurredBilly,assheturnedwithasmiletogreetAuntHannah,whohadjustenteredtheroom."I’mnotgoingtomarry;amI,AuntHannah?"
  "Er——what?Marry?Mygriefandconscience,whataquestion,Billy!Ofcourseyou’regoingtomarry——whenthetimecomes!"
  exclaimedAuntHannah.
  Billylaughedandshookherheadvigorously.Butevenassheopenedherlipstoreply,RosaappearedandannouncedthatMr.
  Calderwellwaswaitingdown—stairs.Billywasangrythen,forafterthemaidwasgone,themerrimentinAuntHannah’slaughonlymatchedthatinMarie’s——andtheintonationwasunmistakable.
  "Well,I’mnot!"declaredBillywithpinkcheeksandmuchindignation,asshelefttheroom.Andasiftoconvinceherself,Marie,AuntHannah,andalltheworldthatsuchwasthecase,sherefusedCalderwellsodecidedlythatnightwhenhe,forthehalf—
  dozenthtime,laidhishandandheartatherfeet,thatevenCalderwellhimselfwasconvinced——sofarashisowncasewasconcerned——andlefttownthenextday.
  BertramtoldAuntHannahafterwardthatheunderstoodMr.Calderwellhadgonetopartsunknown.TohimselfBertramshamelesslyownedthatthemore"unknown"theywere,thebetterhehimselfwouldbepleased.
  CHAPTERXXX
  MARIEFINDSAFRIEND
  ItwasonaverycoldJanuaryafternoon,andCyrilwashurryingupthehilltowardBilly’shouse,whenhewasstartledtoseeaslenderyoungwomansittingonacurbstonewithherheadagainstanelectric—lightpost.Hestoppedabruptly.
  "Ibegyourpardon,but——why,MissHawthorn!ItisMissHawthorn;
  isn’tit?"
  Underhisquestioningeyesthegirl’spalefacebecamesopainfullyscarletthatinsheerpitythemanturnedhiseyesaway.Hethoughthehadseenwomenblushbefore,buthedecidednowthathehadnot.
  "I’msure——haven’tImetyouatMissNeilson’s?Areyouill?
  Can’tIdosomethingforyou?"hebegged.
  "Yes——no——thatis,IAMMissHawthorn,andI’vemetyouatMissNeilson’s,"stammeredthegirl,faintly."Butthereisn’tanything,thankyou,thatyoucando——Mr.Henshaw.Istoppedto——
  rest."
  Themanfrowned.
  "But,surely——pardonme,MissHawthorn,butIcan’tthinkityourusualcustomtochooseanicycurbstoneforarestingplace,withthethermometerdowntozero.Youmustbeill.LetmetakeyoutoMissNeilson’s."
  "No,no,thankyou,"criedthegirl,strugglingtoherfeet,thevividredagainfloodingherface."Ihavealesson——togive."
  "Nonsense!You’renotfittogivealesson.Besides,theyareallfolderol,anyway,halfofthem.Adozenlessons,moreorless,won’tmakeanydifference;they’llplayjustaswell——andjustasatrociously.Come,IinsistupontakingyoutoMissNeilson’s."
  "No,no,thankyou!Ireallymustn’t.I——"Shecouldsaynomore.Astrong,yetverygentlehandhadtakenfirmholdofherarminsuchawayashalftosupporther.Aforcequiteoutsideofherselfwascarryingherforwardstepbystep——andMissHawthornwasnotusedtostrong,gentlehands,noryettoaforcequiteoutsideofherself.NeitherwassheaccustomedtowalkarminarmwithMr.CyrilHenshawtoMissBilly’sdoor.Whenshereachedtherehercheekswerelikeredrosesforcolor,andhereyeswerelikethestarsforbrightness.Yetaminutelater,confrontedbyMissBilly’sastonishedeyes,thestarsandtherosesfled,andaverywhite—facedgirlfelloverinadeathlikefaintinCyrilHenshaw’sarms.
  MariewasputtobedinthelittleroomnexttoBilly’s,andwasperemptorilyhushedwhenfaintremonstrancewasmade.Thenextmorning,white—facedandwide—eyed,sheresolutelypulledherselfhalfupright,andannouncedthatshewasallwellandmustgohome——
  hometoMariewasasix—by—ninehallbed—roominaSouthEndlodginghouse.
  VerygentlyBillypushedherbackonthepillowandlaidadetaininghandonherarm.
  "No,dear.Now,pleasebesensibleandlistentoreason.Youaremyguest.Youdidnotknowit,perhaps,forI’mafraidtheinvitationgotalittledelayed.Butyou’retostay——oh,lotsofweeks."
  "I——stayhere?Why,Ican’t——indeed,Ican’t,"protestedMarie.
  "Butthatisn’tabitofanicewaytoacceptaninvitation,"
  disapprovedBilly."Youshouldsay,’Thankyou,I’dbedelighted,I’msure,andI’llstay.’"
  Inspiteofherselfthelittlemusicteacherlaughed,andinthelaughhertensemusclesrelaxed.
  "MissBilly,MissBilly,whatisonetodowithyou?Surelyyouknow——youmustknowthatIcan’tdowhatyouask!"
  "I’msureIdon’tseewhynot,"arguedBilly."I’mmerelygivingyouaninvitationandallyouhavetodoistoacceptit."
  "Buttheinvitationisonlythekindwayyourhearthasofcoveringanotherofyourmanycharities,"objectedMarie;"besides,Ihavetoteach.Ihavemylivingtoearn."
  "Butyoucan’t,"demurredtheother."That’sjustthetrouble.
  Don’tyousee?Thedoctorsaidlastnightthatyoumustnotteachagainthiswinter."
  "Notteach——again——thiswinter!No,no,hecouldnotbesocruelasthat!"
  "Itwasn’tcruel,dear;itwaskind.Youwouldbeillifyouattemptedit.Nowyou’llgetbetter.Hesaysallyouneedisrestandcare——andthat’sexactlywhatImeanmyguestshallhave."
  Quicktearscametothesickgirl’seyes.
  "Therecouldn’tbeakinderheartthanyours,MissBilly,"shemurmured,"butIcouldn’t——Ireallycouldn’tbeaburdentoyoulikethis.Ishallgotosomehospital."
  "Butyouaren’tgoingtobeaburden.Youaregoingtobemyfriendandcompanion."
  "Acompanion——andinbedlikethis?"
  "Well,THATwouldn’tbeimpossible,"smiledBilly;"but,asithappensyouwon’thavetoputthattothetest,foryou’llsoonbeupanddressed.Thedoctorsaysso.Nowsurelyyouwillstay."
  Therewasalongpause.Thelittlemusicteacher’seyeshadleftBilly’sfaceandwerecirclingtheroom,wistfullylingeringonthehangingsoffilmylace,thedaintywallcovering,andtheexquisitewatercolorsintheirwhite—and—goldframes.Atlastshedrewadeepsigh.
  "Yes,I’llstay,"shebreathedrapturously;"but——youmustletmehelp."
  "Help?Helpwhat?"
  "Helpyou;yourletters,yourmusic—copying,youraccounts——
  anything,everything.Andifyoudon’tletmehelp,"——themusicteacher’svoicewasverysternnow——"ifyoudon’tletmehelp,I
  shallgohomejust——as——soon——as——I——can——walk!"
  "Dearme!"dimpledBilly."Andisthatall?Well,youshallhelp,andtoyourheart’scontent,too.Infact,I’mnotatallsurethatIsha’n’tkeepyoudarningstockingsandmakingpuddingsallthetime,"sheaddedmischievously,asshelefttheroom.
  MissHawthornsatupthenextday.Thedayfollowing,inoneofBilly’s"flutterywrappers,"asshecalledthem,shewalkedallabouttheroom.Verysoonshewasabletogodown—stairs,andinanastonishinglyshorttimeshefittedintothedailylifeasifshehadalwaysbeenthere.Shewas,moreover,ofsuchassistancetoBillythatevensheherselfcouldseethevalueofherwork;andsoshestayed,content.
  ThelittlemusicteachersawagooddealofBilly’sfriendsthen,particularlyoftheHenshawbrothers;andverygladwasBillytoseethecomradeshipgrowingbetweenthem.ShehadknownthatWilliamwouldbekindtotheorphangirl,butshehadfearedthatMariewouldnotunderstandBertram’snonsenseorCyril’sreserve.
  ButverysoonBertramhadbegged,andobtained,permissiontotrytoreproduceoncanvasthesheenofthefine,fairhair,andtheveiledbloomoftherose—leafskinthatwereMarie’sgreatestcharms;andalreadyCyrilhadunbentfromhisusualstiffnessenoughtoplaytohertwice.SoBilly’sfearsonthatscorewereatanend.
  CHAPTERXXXI
  THEENGAGEMENTOFONE
  ManytimesduringthosewinterdaysBillythoughtofMarie’swords:
  "Butwhatifthemanandthemusicbothhappentobeonthesameside?"Theyworriedher,tosomeextent,and,curiously,theypleasedanddispleasedheratthesametime.
  Shetoldherselfthatsheknewverywell,ofcourse,whatMariemeant:itwasCyril;hewastheman,andthemusic.ButwasCyrilbeginningtocareforher;anddidshewanthimto?VeryseriouslyonedayBillyaskedherselfthesequestions;verycalmlyshearguedthematterinhermind——aswasBilly’sway.
  Shewasproud,certainly,ofwhatherinfluencehadapparentlydoneforCyril.Shewasgratifiedthattoherhewasshowingtherealdepthandbeautyofhisnature.ItWASflatteringtofeelthatshe,andonlyshe,hadthuswontheregardofaprofessionalwoman—
  hater.Then,besidesallthis,therewashismusic——hisgloriousmusic.Thinkoftheblissoflivingeverwiththat!Imaginelifewithamanwhosesoulwouldbesoperfectlyattunedtohersthatexistencewouldbeonegrandharmony!Ah,that,truly,wouldbetheidealmarriage!Butshehadplannednottomarry.Billyfrownednow,andtappedherfootnervously.Itwas,indeed,mostpuzzling——thisquestion,andshedidnotwanttomakeamistake.
  Then,too,shedidnotwishtowoundCyril.IfthedearmanHAD
  comeoutofhisicyprison,andwerereachingouttimidhandstoherforherhelp,herinterest,herlove——thetragedyofit,ifhemetwithnoresponse!ThisvisionofCyrilwithoutstretchedhands,andofherselfwithcold,avertedeyeswasthelaststrawinthebalancewithBilly.ShedecidedsuddenlythatshedidcareforCyril——alittle;andthatsheprobablycouldcareforhimagreatdeal.Withthisthought,Billyblushed——alreadyinherownmindshewasasgoodaspledgedtoCyril.
  ItwasagreatchangeforBilly——thissuddenleapfromgirlhoodandirresponsibilitytowomanhoodandcare;butshetookitfearlessly,resolutely.IfshewastobeCyril’swifeshemustmakeherselffitforit——andinpursuanceofthishighidealshefollowedMarieintothekitchentheverynexttimethelittlemusicteacherwentouttomakeoneofherdaintydessertsthatthefamilylikedsowell.
  "I’lljustwatch,ifyoudon’tmind,"announcedBilly.
  "Why,ofcoursenot,"smiledMarie,"butIthoughtyoudidn’tliketomakepuddings."
  "Idon’t,"ownedBilly,cheerfully.
  "Thenwhythis——watchfulness?"
  "Nothing,onlyIthoughtitmightbejustaswellifIknewhowtomakethem.YouknowhowCyril——thatis,ALLtheHenshawboyslikeeverykindyoumake."
  TheegginMarie’shandslippedfromherfingersandcrasheduntidilyontheshelf.WithagleefullaughBillywelcomedthediversion.Shehadnotmeanttospeaksoplainly.ItwasonethingtotrytofitherselftobeCyril’swife,andquiteanothertodisplaythoseeffortssoopenlybeforetheworld.
  Thepuddingwasmadeatlast,butMarieprovedtobeanervousteacher.Herhandshook,andhermemoryalmostfailedheratoneortwocriticalpoints.Billylaughinglysaidthatitmustbestagefright,owingtothepresenceofherselfasspectator;andwiththisMariepromptly,andsomewhateffusively,agreed.
  SoverybusywasBillyduringthenextfewdays,acquiringhernewdomesticity,thatshedidnotnoticehowlittleshewasseeingofCyril.Thenshesuddenlyrealizedit,andaskedherselfthereasonforit.Cyrilwasatthehousecertainly,justasfrequentlyashehadbeen;butshesawthatanewshynessinherselfhaddevelopedwhichwascausinghertoberestlessinhispresence,andwasleadinghertolikebettertohaveMarieorAuntHannahintheroomwhenhecalled.Shediscovered,too,thatshewelcomedWilliam,andevenBertram,withpeculiarenthusiasm——iftheyhappenedtointerruptatete—a—tetewithCyril.
  Billywasdisturbedatthis.Shetoldherselfthatthisshynesswasnotstrange,perhaps,inasmuchasherideasinregardtoloveandmarriagehadundergonesoabruptachange;butitmustbeovercome.IfshewastobeCyril’swife,shemustliketobewithhim——andofcourseshereallydidliketobewithhim,forshehadenjoyedhiscompanionshipverymuchduringallthesepastweeks.
  Shesetherselftherefore,now,determinedlytocultivatingCyril.
  ItwasthenthatBillymadeastrangeandfearsomediscovery:thereweresomethingsaboutCyrilthatshedid——not——like!
  Billywasinexpressiblyshocked.Heretoforehehadbeensohigh,soirreproachable,sogod—like!——butheretoforehehadbeenafriend.Nowhewasappearinginanewrole——thoughunconsciously,sheknew.Heretoforeshehadlookedathimwitheyesthatsawonlythedelightfulandmarvelousunfoldingofacoldlyreservednatureunderthewarmthofherownencouragingsmile.Nowshelookedathimwitheyesthatsawonlythepossibilitiesofthatsamenaturewhenitshouldhavebeenunfoldedinalifelongcompanionship.Andwhatshesawfrightenedher.Therewasstillthemusic——sheacknowledgedthat;butithadcometoBillywithoverwhelmingforcethatmusic,afterall,wasnoteverything.Themancounted,aswell.VeryfranklythenBillystatedthecasetoherself.
  "Whatpassesfor’fascinatingmystery’inhimnowwillbeplainmoroseness——sometime.Heis’taciturn’now;he’llbe——cross,then.
  Itis’erratic’whenhewon’tplaythepianoto—day;butafewyearsfromnow,whenherefusessomesimplerequestofmine,itwillbe——stubbornness.Allthisitwillbe——ifIdon’tlovehim;
  andIdon’t.IknowIdon’t.Besides,wearen’treallycongenial.
  Ilikepeoplearound;hedoesn’t.Iliketogotoplays;hedoesn’t.Helikesrainydays;Iabhorthem.Thereisnodoubtofit——lifewithhimwouldnotbeonegrandharmony;itwouldbeonejanglingdiscord.Isimplycannotmarryhim.Ishallhavetobreaktheengagement!
  Billyspokewithregretfulsorrow.ItwasevidentthatshegrievedtobringpaintoCyril.Thensuddenlythegloomleftherface:shehadrememberedthatthe"engagement"wasjustthreeweeksold——andwasaprofoundsecret,notonlytothebridegroomelect,buttoalltheworldaswell——saveherself!
  Billywasveryhappyafterthat.Shesangaboutthehouseallday,andshedancedsometimesfromroomtoroom,solightwereherfeetandherheart.ShemadenomorepuddingswithMarie’ssupervision,butshewasparticularlycarefultohavethelittlemusicteacherorAuntHannahwithherwhenCyrilcalled.Shemadeuphermind,itistrue,thatshehadbeenmistaken,andthatCyrildidnotloveher;stillshewishedtobeonthesafeside,andshebecamemoreandmoreaversetobeingleftalonewithhimforanylengthoftime.
  CHAPTERXXXII
  CYRILHASSOMETHINGTOSAY
  LongbeforespringBillywasforcedtoowntoherselfthatherfanciedsecurityfromlovemakingonthepartofCyrilnolongerexisted.Shebegantosuspectthattherewasreasonforherfears.
  Cyrilcertainlywas"different."Hewasmoreapproachable,lessreserved,evenwithMarieandAuntHannah.Hewasnotnearlysotaciturn,either,andhewasmuchmoregraciousabouthisplaying.
  EvenMariedaredtoaskhimfrequentlyformusic,andheneverrefusedherrequest.ThreetimeshehadtakenBillytosomeplaythatshewantedtosee,andhehadinvitedMarie,too,besidesAuntHannah,whichhadpleasedBillyverymuch.HehadbeenatthesametimesogenialandsogallantthatBillyhaddeclaredtoMarieafterwardthathedidnotseemlikehimselfatall,butlikesomeoneelse.
  Mariehaddisagreedwithher,itistrue,andhadsaidstiffly:
  "I’msureIthoughtheseemedverymuchlikehimself."ButthathadnotchangedBilly’sopinionatall.
  ToBilly’smind,nothingbutlovecouldsohavesoftenedthesternCyrilshehadknown.Shewas,therefore,allthemorecarefulthesedaystoavoidatete—a—tetewithhim,thoughshewasnotalwayssuccessful,particularlyowingtoMarie’sunaccountableperversenessinsooftenhavingletterstowriteorworktodo,justwhenBillymostwantedhertomakeasafethirdwithherselfandCyril.Itwasuponsuchanoccasion,afterMariehadabruptlyleftthemalonetogether,thatCyrilhadobserved,alittlesharply:
  "Billy,Iwishyouwouldn’tsayagainwhatyousaidtenminutesagowhenMissMariewashere."
  "Whatwasthat?"
  AverysillyreferencetothatoldnotionthatyouandeveryoneelseseemtohavethatIama’woman—hater.’"
  Billy’sheartskippedabeat.Onethought,poundedthroughherbrainanddinneditselfintoherears——atallcostsCyrilmustnotbeallowedtosaythatwhichshesofeared;hemustbesavedfromhimself.
  "Woman—hater?Why,ofcourseyou’reawoman—hater,"shecriedmerrily."I’msure,I——Ithinkit’slovelytobeawoman—hater."
  Themanopenedwidehiseyes;thenhefrownedangrily.
  "Nonsense,Billy,Iknowbetter.Besides,I’minearnest,andI’mnotawoman—hater."
  "Oh,buteveryonesaysyouare,"chatteredBilly."And,afterall,youknowitISdistinguishing!"
  Withadisdainfulexclamationthemansprangtohisfeet.Foratimehepacedtheroominsilence,watchedbyBilly’sfearfuleyes;
  thenhecamebackanddroppedintothelowchairatBilly’sside.
  Hiswholemannerhadundergoneacompletechange.Hewasalmostshamefacedashesaid:
  "Billy,IsupposeImightaswellownup.Idon’tthinkIdidthinkmuchofwomenuntilIsaw——you."
  Billyswallowedandwetherlips.Shetriedtospeak;butbeforeshecouldformthewordsthemanwentonwithhisremarks;andBillydidnotknowwhethertobethemorerelievedorfrightenedthereat.
  "Butyouseenowit’sdifferent.That’swhyIdon’tliketosailanylongerunderfalsecolors.There’sbeenachange——agreatandwonderfulchangethatIhardlyunderstandmyself."
  "That’sit!Youdon’tunderstandit,I’msure,"interposedBilly,feverishly."Itmaynotbesuchachange,afterall.Youmaybedeceivingyourself,"shefinishedhopefully.
  Themansighed.
  "Ican’twonderyouthinkso,ofcourse,"healmostgroaned."I
  wasafraiditwouldbelikethat.Whenone’sbeenpaintedblackallone’slife,it’snoteasytochangeone’scolor,ofcourse."
  "Oh,butIdidn’tsaythatblackwasn’taverynicecolor,"
  stammeredBilly,alittlewildly.
  "Thankyou."Cyril’sheavybrowsroseandfellthefractionofaninch."Still,ImustconfessthatjustnowIshouldpreferanothershade."
  Hepaused,andBillycastdistractedlyaboutinhermindforasimple,naturalchangeofsubject.ShehadjustdecidedtoaskhimwhathethoughtoftheconditionoftheBrittanypeasants,whenhequestionedabruptly,andinavoicethatwasnotquitesteady:
  "Billy,whatshouldyousayifIshouldtellyouthattheavowedwoman—haterhadstrayedsofarfromtheprescribedpathasto——tolikeonewomanwellenoughastowantto——marryher?"
  ThewordwaslikeamatchtothegunpowderofBilly’sfears.Herself—controlwasshatteredinstantlyintobits.
  "Marry?No,no,youwouldn’t——youcouldn’treallybethinkingofthat,"shebabbled,growingredandwhitebyturns."Onlythinkhowawifewould——wouldb—botheryou!"
  "Botherme?WhenIlovedher?"
  "Butjustthink——remember!She’dwantcushionsandrugsandcurtains,andyoudon’tlikethem;andshe’dalwaysbetalkingandlaughingwhenyouwantedquiet;andshe——she’dwanttodragyououttoplaysandpartiesand——andeverywhere.Indeed,Cyril,I’msureyou’dneverlikeawife——long!"Billystoppedonlybecauseshehadnobreathwithwhichtocontinue.
  Cyrillaughedalittlegrimly.
  "Youdon’tdrawaveryattractivepicture,Billy.Still,I’mnotafraid.Idon’tthinkthisparticular——wifewoulddoanyofthosethings——totroubleme."
  "Oh,butyoudon’tknow,youcan’ttell,"arguedthegirl.
  "Besides,youhavehadsolittleexperiencewithwomenthatyou’djustbesuretomakeamistakeatfirst.Youwanttolookaroundverycarefully——verycarefully,beforeyoudecide."
  "Ihavelookedaround,andverycarefully,Billy.Iknowthatinalltheworldthereisjustonewomanforme."
  Billystruggledtoherfeet.Mingledpainandterrorlookedfromhereyes.Shebegantospeakwildly,incoherently.ShewonderedafterwardjustwhatshewouldhavesaidifAuntHannahhadnotcomeintotheroomatthatmomentandannouncedthatBertramwasatthedoortotakeherforasleigh—rideifshecaredtogo.
  "Ofcourseshe’llgo,"declaredCyril,promptly,answeringforher.
  "ItistimeIwasoffanyhow."ToBilly,hesaidinalowvoice:
  "Youhaven’tbeenveryencouraging,littlegirl——infact,you’vebeenmightydiscouraging.Butsomeday——someotherday,I’lltrytomakecleartoyou——manythings."
  BillygreetedBertramverycordially.Itwassucharelief——hischeery,genialcompanionship!Theair,too,wasbracing,andalltheworldlayunderasnow—whiteblanketofsparklingpurity.
  Everythingwassobeautiful,sorestful!
  Itwasnotsurprising,perhaps,thattheveryfranknessofBilly’sjoymisledBertramalittle.Hisbloodtingledathernearness,andhiseyesgrewdeepandtenderashelookeddownatherhappyface.Butofalltheeagerwordsthatweresonearhislips,notonereachedthegirl’searsuntilthegood—byesweresaid;thenwistfullyBertramhazarded:
  "Billy,don’tyouthink,sometimes,thatI’mgaining——justalittleonthatrivalofmine——thatmusic?"
  Billy’sfaceclouded.Sheshookherheadgently.
  "Bertram,pleasedon’t——whenwe’vehadsuchabeautifulhourtogether,"shebegged."Ittroublesme.Ifyoudo,Ican’tgo——
  again."
  "Butyoushallgoagain,"criedBertram,bravelysmilingstraightintohereyes."Andtheresha’n’teveranythingintheworldtroubleyou,either——thatIcanhelp!"
  CHAPTERXXXIII
  WILLIAMISWORRIED
  Billy’ssleigh—ridehadbeenduetothekindnessofabelatedwinterstormthathadsurprisedeveryonethelastofMarch.Afterthat,March,asifashamedofheruntowardbehavior,donnedhersweetestsmilesand"wentout"liketheproverbiallamb.WiththecomingofApril,andthestirringoflifeinthetrees,Billy,too,begantoberestless;andattheearliestpossiblemomentshemadeherplansforherlonganticipated"digginginthedirt."
  Justhere,muchtohersurprise,shemetwithwonderfulassistancefromBertram.Heseemedtoknowjustwhenandwhereandhowtodig,andhedisplayedsuddenlyaremarkableknowledgeoflandscapegardening.(Thatthisknowledgewasasrecentinitsacquirementasitwassuddeninitsdisplay,Billydidnotknow.)Verylearnedlyhetalkedofperennialsandannuals;andwithouthesitationhemadeoutalistoffloweringshrubsandplantsthatwouldgivehera"successionofbloomthroughouttheseason."Hiswordsandphrasessmackedloudlyoftheverynewestflorists’
  catalogues,butBillydidnotnoticethat.Sheonlywonderedattheseeminglyexhaustlesssourceofhiswisdom.
  "Isuspect’twouldhavebeenbetterifwe’dbegunthingslastfall,"hetoldherfrowninglyoneday."Butthere’splentywecandonowanyway;andwe’llputinsomequick—growingthings,justforthisseason,untilwecangetthemorepermanentthingsestablished."
  Andsotheyworkedtogether,studying,scheming,orderingplantsandseeds,theirtwoheadsclosetogetherabovethegailycoloredcatalogues.Latertherewastheworkitselftobedone,andthoughstrongmendidtheheavierpart,therewasyetplentyleftforBilly’seagerfingers——andforBertram’s.Andifsometimesintheintimacyofseed—sowingandplant—setting,thetouchoftheslendererfingerssentathrillthroughthebrownerones,Bertrammadenosign.Hewascarefulalwaystobethecheerful,helpfulassistant——andthatwasall.
  Billy,itistrue,wasalittledisturbedatbeingquitesomuchwithBertram.Shedreadedarepetitionofsomesuchwordsashadbeenutteredattheendofthesleigh—ride.ShetoldherselfthatshehadnorighttogrieveBertram,tomakeithardforhimbybeingwithhim;butattheverynextbreath,shecouldbutquestion;didshegrievehim?Wasithardforhimtohaveherwithhim?Thenshewouldglanceathiseagerfaceandmeethisbuoyantsmile——andanswer"no."Afterthat,foratime,atleast,herfearswouldbeless.
  SystematicallyBillyavoidedCyrilthesedays.Shecouldnotforgethispromisetomakemanythingscleartohersomeday.Shethoughtsheknewwhathemeant——thathewouldtrytoconvinceher(asshehadtriedtoconvinceherself)thatshewouldmakeagoodwifeforhim.
  BillywasverysurethatifCyrilcouldbepreventedfromspeakinghismindjustnow,hismindwouldchangeintime;henceherdeterminationtogivehismindthatopportunity.
  Billy’savoidanceofCyrilwasthemoreeasilyaccomplishedbecauseshewasforatimetakingacompleterestfromhermusic.Thenewsongshadbeenfinishedandsenttothepublishers.Therewasnoexcuse,therefore,forCyril’scomingtothehouseonthatscore;
  and,indeed,heseemedofhisownaccordtobemakingonlyinfrequentvisitsnow.Billywaspleased,particularlyasMariewasnottheretoplaythirdparty.Mariehadtakenupherteachingagain,muchtoBilly’sdistress.
  "ButIcan’tstayherealways,likethis,"Mariehadprotested.
  "ButIshouldliketokeepyou!"Billyhadresponded,withnolessdecision.
  Mariehadbeenfirm,however,andhadgone,leavingthelittlehouselonelywithouther.
  AsidefromherworkinthegardenBillyasresolutelyavoidedBertramasshedidCyril.Itwasnatural,therefore,thatatthiscrisissheshouldturntoWilliamwithapeculiarfeelingofrestfulness.He,atleast,wouldbesafe,shetoldherself.Soshefranklywelcomedhiseveryappearance,sungtohim,playedtohim,andtooklongwalkswithhimtoseesomewonderfulbraceletornecklacethathehaddiscoveredinadingylittlecurio—shop.
  Williamwasdelighted.Hewasveryfondofhisnamesake,andhehadsecretlychafedalittleatthewayhisyoungerbrothershadmonopolizedherattention.Hewasrejoicednowthatsheseemedtobeturningtohimforcompanionship;andveryeagerlyheacceptedallthetimeshecouldgivehim.
  Williamhad,intruth,beengrowingmoreandmorelonelyeversinceBilly’sbriefstaybeneathhisroofyearsbefore.Thosefewshortweeksofhermerrypresencehadshownhimhowveryforlornthehousewaswithoutit.Moreandmoresorrowfullyduringpastyears,histhoughtshadgonebacktothelittlewhiteflannelbundleandtothedearhopesithadcarriedsolongago.Iftheboyhadonlylived,thoughtWilliam,mournfully,therewouldnotnowhavebeenthatdrearysilenceinhishome,andthatsoreacheinhisheart.
  VerysoonafterWilliamhadfirstseenBilly,hebegantolaywonderfulplans,andineveryplanwasBilly.Shewasnothischildbyfleshandblood,heacknowledged,butshewashisbyrightofloveandneededcare.Infancyhelookedstraightdowntheyearsahead,andeverywherehesawBilly,aloving,much—loveddaughter,thejoyofhislife,thesolaceofhisdecliningyears.
  TonoonehadWilliamtalkedofthis——andtonoonedidheshowthebitternessofhisgriefwhenhesawhisvisionfadeintonothingnessthroughBilly’sunchangingrefusaltoliveinhishome.
  Onlyhehimselfknewtheheartache,theloneliness,thealmostunbearablelongingofthepastwintermonthswhileBillyhadlivedatHillside;andonlyhehimselfknewnowthealmostoverwhelmingjoythatwashisbecauseofwhathethoughthesawinBilly’schangedattitudetowardhimself.
  GreataswasWilliam’sjoy,however,hiscautionwasgreater.HesaidnothingtoBillyofhisnewhopes,thoughhedidtrytopavethewaybydroppinganoccasionalwordaboutthelonelinessoftheBeaconStreethousesinceshewentaway.Therewassomethingelse,too,thatcausedWilliamtobesilent——whathethoughthesawbetweenBillyandBertram.ThatBertramwasinlovewithBilly,heguessed;butthatBillywasnotinlovewithBertramheverymuchfeared.Hehesitatedalmosttospeakormovelestsomethingheshouldsayordoshould,justatthecriticalmoment,turnmattersthewrongway.ToWilliamthismarriageofBertramandBillywasanidealmethodofsolvingtheproblem,asofcourseBillywouldcometheretothehousetolive,andhewouldhavehis"daughter"
  afterall.Butasthedayspassed,andhecouldseenoprogressonBertram’spart,nochangeinBilly,hebegantobeseriouslyworried——andtoshowit.
  CHAPTERXXXIV
  CLASSDAY
  EarlyinJuneBillyannouncedherintentionofnotgoingawayatallthatsummer.
  "Idon’tneedit,"shedeclared."Ihavethiscool,beautifulhouse,thisair,thissunshine,thisadorableview.Besides,I’vegotaschemeImeantocarryout."
  TherewassomeconsternationamongBilly’sfriendswhentheyfoundoutwhatthis"scheme"was:sundryofBilly’shumbleracquaintancesweretosharethehouse,theair,thesunshine,andtheadorableviewwithher.
  "But,mydearBilly,"Bertramcried,aghast,"youdon’tmeantosaythatyouaregoingtoturnyourbeautifullittlehouseintoafresh—airplaceforBoston’sslumchildren!"
  "Notabitofit,"smiledthegirl,"thoughI’dliketo,really,ifIcould,"sheadded,perversely."Butthisisquiteanotherthing.
  It’snoslumwork,nocharity.Inthefirstplacemyguestsaren’tquitesopoorasthat,andthey’remuchtooproudtobereachedbytheavowedcharityworker.Buttheyneeditjustthesame."
  "Butyouhaven’tmuchspareroom;haveyou?"questionedBertram.
  "No,unfortunately;soIshallhavetotakeonlytwoorthreeatatime,andkeepthemmaybeaweekortendays.It’sjustasugarplum,Bertram.Trulyitis,"sheaddedwhimsically,butwithatenderlightinhereyes.
  "Butwhoarethesepeople?"Bertram’sfacehadlostitslookofshockedsurprise,andhisvoiceexpressedgenuineinterest.
  "Well,tobeginwith,there’sMarie.She’llstayallsummerandhelpmeentertainmyguests;atthesametimeherdutieswon’tbearduous,andshe’llgetalittleplaytimeherself.OneweekI’mgoingtohavealittleoldmaidwhokeepsalodginghouseintheWestEnd.Foruncountedyearsshe’sbeenpracticallytiedtoadoorbell,withneverawholedaytobreathefree.I’vemadearrangementsthereforasistertokeephouseawholeweek,andI’mgoingtoshowthislittleoldmaidthingsshehasn’tseenforyears:theocean,thegreenfields,andasummerplayortwo,perhaps.
  "Thenthere’salittlecouplethatliveinathird—storyflatinSouthBoston.They’reyoungandlikegoodtimes;butthemanisonasmallsalary,andtheyhavehadlotsofsickness.He’sbeenoutsomuchhecan’ttakeanyvacation,andtheywouldn’thaveanymoneytogoanywhereifhecould.Well,I’mgoingtohavethemaweek.She’llbehereallthetime,andhe’llcomeoutatnight,ofcourse.
  "Anotheroneisawidowwithsixchildren.Thechildrenarealreadyprovidedforbyafresh—airsociety,butthewomanI’mgoingtotake,and——andgiveherawholeweekoffoodthatshedidn’thavetocookherself.Anotheroneisawomanwhoisnotsoverypoor,butwhohaslostherbaby,andisblueanddiscouraged.
  Therearesomechildren,too,onecrippled,andaboywhosayshe’s’justlonesome.’Andthereare——really,Bertram,thereisnoendtothem."
  "Icanwellbelievethat,"declaredBertram,withemphasis,"sofarasyourgenerousheartisconcerned."
  Billycoloredandlookeddistressed.
  "Butitisn’tgenerosityorcharityatall,Bertram,"sheprotested.
  "Youaremistakenwhenyouthinkitis——really!Why,Ishallenjoyeverybitofitjustaswellastheydo——andbetter,perhaps."
  "Butyoustayhere——inthecity——allsummerfortheirsakes."
  "WhatifIdo?Besides,thisisn’ttherealcity,"arguedBilly,"withallthesetreesandlawnsaboutone.Andanotherthing,"sheadded,leaningforwardconfidentially,"Imightaswellconfess,Bertram,youcouldn’thiremetoleavetheplacethissummer——notwhileallthesethingsIplantedarecomingup!"
  Bertramlaughed;butforsomereasonhelookedwonderfullyhappyasheturnedaway.
  OnthefifteenthofJuneKateandherhusbandarrivedfromtheWest.AyoungbrotherofMr.Hartwell’swastobegraduatedfromHarvard,andKatesaidtheyhadcomeontorepresentthefamily,astheelderMr.andMrs.Hartwellwerenotstrongenoughtoundertakethejourney.Katewaslookingwellandhappy.ShegreetedBillywitheffusivecordiality,andopenlyexpressedheradmirationofHillside.Shelookedverykeenlyintoherbrothers’face,andseemedwellpleasedwiththeappearanceofCyrilandBertram,butnotsomuchsowithWilliam’scountenance.
  "WilliamdoesNOTlookwell,"shedeclaredonedaywhensheandBillywerealonetogether.
  "Sick?UncleWilliamsick?Oh,Ihopenot!"criedthegirl.
  "Idon’tknowwhetherit’s’sick’ornot,"returnedMrs.Hartwell.
  "Butit’ssomething.He’stroubled.I’mgoingtospeaktohim.
  He’sworriedoversomething;andhe’sgrownterriblythin."
  "Buthe’salwaysthin,"reasonedBilly.
  "Iknow,butnotlikethis——ever.Youdon’tnoticeit,perhaps,orrealizeit,seeinghimeverydayasyoudo.ButIknowsomethingtroubleshim."
  "Oh,Ihopenot,"murmuredBilly,withanxiouseyes."Wedon’twantUncleWilliamtroubled:wealllovehimtoowell."
  Mrs.Hartwelldidnotatoncereply;butforalongminuteshethoughtfullystudiedBilly’sfaceasitwasbentabovethesewinginBilly’shand.Whenshedidspeakshehadchangedthesubject.
  YoungHartwellwastodelivertheIvyOrationintheStadiumonClassDay,andalltheHenshawswerelookingeagerlyforwardtotheoccasion.
  "YouhaveseentheStadium,ofcourse,"saidBertramtoBilly,afewdaysbeforetheanticipatedFriday.
  "Onlyfromacrosstheriver."
  "Isthatso?Andyou’veneverbeenhereClassDay,either.Good!
  Thenyou’vegotatreatinstore.Justwaitandsee!"
  AndBillywaited——andshesaw.Billybegantosee,infact,beforeClassDay.YoungHartwellwasapopularfellow,andhewaseagertohavehisfriendsmeetBillyandtheHenshaws.HewasamemberoftheInstituteof1770,D.K.E.,Stylus,Signet,RoundTable,andHastyPuddingClubs,andnearlyeveryoneofthesehadsomesortoffunctionplannedforClass—Dayweek.BythetimethedayitselfarrivedBillywasalmostasexcitedaswasyoungHartwellhimself.
  ItrainedClass—Daymorning,butatnineo’clockthesuncameoutanddrovethecloudsaway,muchtoeveryone’sdelight.Billy’sdaybeganatnoonwiththespreadgivenbytheHastyPuddingClub.
  Billywonderedafterwardhowmanytimesthatdayremarksliketheseweremadetoher:
  "You’vebeenhereClassDaybefore,ofcourse.You’veseentheconfetti—throwing!No?Well,youjustwait!"
  AttenminutesoffourBillyandMrs.Hartwell,withMr.HartwellandBertramasescorts,enteredthecool,echoingshadowsundertheStadium,andthenoutinthesunlighttheybegantoclimbthebroadstepstotheirseats.
  "Iwantedthemhighup,yousee,"explainedBertram,"becauseyoucangettheeffectsomuchbetter.There,hereweare!"
  ForthefirsttimeBillyturnedandlookedabouther.Shegavealowcryofdelight.
  "Oh,oh,howbeautiful——howwonderfullybeautiful!"
  "Youjustwait!"crowedBertram."Ifyouthinkthisisbeautiful,youjustwait!"
  Billydidnotseemtohearhim.Hereyesweresweepingthewonderfulscenebeforeher,andherfacewasaglowwithdelight.
  Firsttherewasthegreatamphitheateritself.Onlythewidecurveofthehorseshoewasropedoffforto—day’saudience.Beyondlaythetwosideswiththeirtierabovetierofemptyseats,almostdazzlinginthesunshine.Withintheroped—offcurvethescenewasofkaleidoscopicbeauty.Charminglygownedyoungwomenandcarefullygroomedyoungmenwereeverywhere,stirring,chatting,laughing.Gay—coloredparasolsandflower—gardenhatsmadehereandtherebrilliantsplashesofrainbowtints.Abovewasanalmostcloudlesscanopyofblue,andatthefarhorizon,earthandskymetandmadeapicturethatwaslikeawondrouspaintedcurtainhungfromheavenitself.
  Atthefirstsoundofthedistantbandthattoldofthegraduates’
  coming,Bertramsaidalmostwistfully:
  "ClassDayistheonlytimewhenIfeel’outofit.’YouseeI’mthefirstmaleHenshawforagesthathasn’tbeenthroughHarvard;
  andto—day,youknow,isthetimewhentheoldgradscomebackanddostuntslikethekids——iftheycan(andsomeofthemcanallright!).Theymarchinbyclassesaheadoftheseniors,andviewitheachotheringivingtheiryells.You’llseeCyrilandWilliam,ifyoureyesaresharpenough——andyou’llseethemasyouneversawthembefore."
  FardownthegreenfieldBillyspiednowthelongblacklineofmovingfigureswithabandinthelead.Nearerandneareritcameuntil,greetedbyamightyroarfromthousandsofthroats,theleaderssweptintothegreatbowlofthehorseshoecurve.
  Andhowtheyyelledandcheered——thosemenwhosefirstClassDaylayfive,ten,fifteen,eventwentyormoreyearsbehindthem,astoldbythebannerswhichtheysoproudlycarried.Howtheygottheirheadstogetherandgavethe"Rah!Rah!Rah!"withunswervingeyesontheirleader!Howtheybeattheairwiththeirhatsintimetotheirlustyshouts!Andhowthethrongsabovecheeredandclappedinanswer,untiltheyalmostsplittheirthroats——anddidsplittheirgloves——especiallywhentheblack—gownedseniorssweptintoview.
  Andwhenthecurvinglineofblackhadbecomeonesolidmassofhumanitythatfilledthebowlfromsidetoside,thevastthrongseatedthemselves,andagreathushfellwhiletheGleeClubsang.
  YoungHartwellprovedtobeagoodspeaker,andhisringingvoicereachedeventhetopmosttierofseats.Billywascharmedandinterested.Everythingshesawandheardwasbutanewsourceofenjoyment,andshehadquiteforgottenthethingforwhichshewasto"wait,"whenshesawtheusherspassingthroughtheaisleswiththeirbasketsofmany—huedpackagesofconfettiandcountlessrollsofpaperribbon.
  Itbeganthen,themerrywarbetweenthestudentsbelowandthethrongabove.Inatricetheairwasfilledwithshimmeringbitsofred,blue,white,green,purple,pink,andyellow.Fromalldirectionsflutteringstreamersthatshowedeverycoloroftherainbow,wereflungtothebreezeuntil,upheldbythesupportingwires,theymadeafairylaceworkofmarvelousbeauty.
  "Oh,oh,oh!"criedBilly,hereyesmistywithemotion."IthinkI
  neversawanythinginmylifesolovely!
  "Ithoughtyou’dlikeit,"gloriedBertram."YouknowIsaidtowait!"
  Butevenwiththis,ClassDayforBillywasnotfinished.TherewasstillHartwell’sownspreadfromsixtoeight,andafterthattherewerethePresident’sreception,anddancingintheMemorialHallandintheGymnasium.TherewastheFairylandoftheyard,too,softlyaglowwithmovingthrongsofbeautifulwomenandgallantmen.ButwhatBillyrememberedbestofallwastheexquisiteharmonythatcametoherthroughthehushednightairwhentheGleeClubsangFairHarvardonthestepsofHolworthyHall.
  CHAPTERXXXV
  SISTERKATEAGAIN
  ItwasontheSundayfollowingClassDaythatMrs.Hartwellcarriedoutherdeterminationto"speaktoWilliam."TheWesthadnottakenfromKateherloveofmanaging,andshethoughtshesawnowamatterthatsorelyneededherguidinghand.
  William’sthinface,anxiouslooks,andnervousmannerhadtroubledhereversinceshecame.Thenoneday,verysuddenly,hadcomeenlightenment:Williamwasinlove——andwithBilly.
  Mrs.HartwellwatchedWilliamverycloselyafterthat.ShesawhiseyesfollowBillyfondly,yetanxiously.Shesawhisopenjoyatbeingwithher,andatanylittleattention,word,orlookthatthegirlgavehim.Sheremembered,too,somethingthatBertramhadsaidaboutWilliam’sgriefbecauseBillywouldnotliveattheStrata.Shethoughtshesawsomethingelse,also:thatBillywasfondofWilliam,butthatWilliamdidnotknowit;hencehisfrequenttroubledscrutinyofherface.WhythesetwoshouldplayatcrosspurposesSisterKatecouldnotunderstand.Shesmiled,however,confidently:theyshouldnotplayatcrosspurposesmuchlonger,shedeclared.
  OnSundayafternoonKateaskedhereldestbrothertotakeherdriving.
  "Notamotorcar;Iwantahorse——thatwillletmetalk,"shesaid.
  "Certainly,"agreedWilliam,withasmile;butBertram,whochancedtohearher,putintheslycomment:"AsifANYhorsecouldprevent——that!"
  OnthedriveKatebegantotalkatonce,butshedidnotplungeintothesubjectnearestherheartuntilshehadadroitlyledWilliamintoaglowingenumerationofBilly’smanycharmingcharacteristics;thenshesaid:
  "William,whydon’tyoutakeBillyhomewithyou?"
  Williamstirreduneasilyashealwaysdidwhenanythingannoyedhim.
  "MydearKate,thereisnothingIshouldlikebettertodo,"hereplied.
  "Thenwhydon’tyoudoit?"
  "I——hopeto,sometime."
  "Butwhynotnow?"
  "I’mafraidBillyisnotquite——ready."
  "Nonsense!Ayounggirllikethatdoesnotknowherownmindlotsoftimes.Justpressthematteralittle.Lovewillworkwonders——
  sometimes."
  Williamblushedlikeagirl.Tohimherwordshadbutonemeaning——
  Bertram’sloveforBilly.Williamhadneverspokenofthissuspectedloveaffairtoanyone.Hehadeventhoughtthathewastheonlyonethathaddiscoveredit.Tohearhissisterreferthuslightlytoitcamethereforeinthenatureofashocktohim.
  "Thenyouhave——seenit——too?"hestammered"’Seenit,too,’"laughedKate,withherconfidenteyesonWilliam’sflushedface,"IshouldsayIhadseenit!Anyonecouldseeit."
  Williamblushedagain.Lovetohimhadalwaysbeensomethingsacred;somethingthatcalledforhushedvoicesandtwilight.
  Thismerrydiscussioninthesunlightofevenanother’slovewasdisconcerting.
  "Nowcome,William,"resumedKate,afteramoment;"speaktoBilly,andhavethemattersettledonceforall.It’sworryingyou.I
  canseeitis."
  AgainWilliamstirreduneasily.
  "But,Kate,Ican’tdoanything.Itoldyoubefore;Idon’tbelieveBillyis——ready."
  "Nonsense!Askher."
  "ButKate,agirlwon’tmarryagainstherwill!"
  "Idon’tbelieveitisagainstherwill."
  "Kate!Honestly?"
  "Honestly!I’vewatchedher."
  "ThenIWILLspeak,"criedtheman,hisfacealight,"if——ifyouthinkanythingIcansaywould——help.Thereisnothing——nothinginallthisworldthatIsodesire,Kate,astohavethatlittlegirlbackhome.Andofcoursethatwoulddoit.She’dlivethere,youknow."
  "Why,of——course,"murmuredKate,withapuzzledfrown.TherewassomethinginthislastremarkofWilliam’sthatshedidnotquiteunderstand.SurelyhecouldnotsupposethatshehadanyideathatafterhehadmarriedBillytheywouldgotoliveanywhereelse;——
  shethought.Foramomentsheconsideredthemattervaguely;thensheturnedherattentiontosomethingelse.Shewasthemorereadytodothisbecauseshebelievedthatshehadsaidenoughforthepresent:itwaswelltosowseeds,butitwasalsowelltoletthemhaveachancetogrow,shetoldherself.
  Mrs.Hartwell’snextmovewastospeaktoBilly,andshewascarefultodothisatonce,sothatshemightpavethewayforWilliam.
  Shebeganherconversationwithaningratiatingsmileandthewords:
  "Well,Billy,I’vebeendoingalittledetectiveworkonmyownaccount."
  "Detectivework?"
  "Yes;aboutWilliam.YouknowItoldyoutheotherdayhowtroubledandanxioushelookedtome.Well,I’vefoundoutwhat’sthematter."
  "Whatisit?"
  "Yourself."
  "Myself!Why,Mrs.Hartwell,whatcanyoumean?"
  Theelderladysmiledsignificantly.
  "Oh,it’smerelyanothercase,mydear,of’faintheartneverwonfairlady.’I’vebeenhelpingonthefaintheart;that’sall."
  "ButIdon’tunderstand."
  "No?Ican’tbelieveyouquitemeanthat,mydear.SurelyyoumustknowhowearnestlymybrotherWilliamislongingforyoutogobackandlivewithhim."
  LikeWilliam,Billyflushedscarlet.
  "Mrs.Hartwell,certainlynoonecouldknowbetterthanYOURSELF
  whythatisquiteimpossible,"shefrowned.
  Theothercoloredconfusedly.
  "Iunderstand,ofcourse,whatyoumean.And,Billy,I’llconfessthatI’vebeensorrylotsoftimes,since,thatIspokeasIdidtoyou,particularlywhenIsawhowitgrievedmybrotherWilliamtohaveyougoaway.IfIblunderedthen,I’msorry;andperhapsI
  didblunder.Atallevents,thatisonlythemorereasonnowwhyI
  amsoanxioustodowhatIcantorectifythatoldmistake,andpleadWilliam’ssuit."
  ToMrs.Hartwell’sblankamazement,Billylaughedoutright.
  "’William’ssuit’!"shequotedmerrily."Why,Mrs.Hartwell,thereisn’tany’suit’toit.UncleWilliamdoesn’twantmetomarryhim!"
  "Indeedhedoes."
  Billystoppedlaughing,andsatsuddenlyerect.
  "MRS.HARTWELL!"
  "Billy,isitpossiblethatyoudidnotknowthis?"
  "IndeedIdon’tknowit,and——excuseme,butIdon’tthinkyoudo,either."
  "ButIdo.I’vetalkedwithhim,andhe’sverymuchinearnest,"
  urgedMrs.Hartwell,speakingveryrapidly."Hesaysthere’snothinginalltheworldthathesodesires.And,Billy,youdocareforhim——Iknowyoudo!"
  "Why,ofcourseIcareforhim——butnot——thatway."
  "But,Billy,think!"Mrs.Hartwellwasveryearnestnow,andalittlefrightened.ShefeltthatshemustbringBillytotermsinsomewaynowthatWilliamhadbeenencouragedtoputhisfatetothetest."JustrememberhowgoodWilliamhasalwaysbeentoyou,andthinkwhatyouhavebeen,andmayBE——ifyouonlywill——inhislonelylife.Thinkofhisgreatsorrowyearsago.Thinkofthisdrearywasteofyearsbetween.Thinkhownowhishearthasturnedtoyouforloveandcomfortandrest.Billy,youcan’tturnaway!——
  youcan’tfinditinyourhearttoturnawayfromthatdear,goodmanwholovesyouso!"Mrs.Hartwell’svoiceshookeffectively,andevenhereyeslookedthroughtears.Mentallyshewascongratulatingherself:shehadnotsupposedshecouldmakesotouchinganappeal.
  Inthechairoppositethegirlsatverystill.Shewaspale,andhereyesshowedafrightenedquestioningintheirdepths.Foralongminuteshesaidnothing,thensherosedazedlytoherfeet.
  "Mrs.Hartwell,pleasedonotspeakofthistoanyone,"shebeggedinalowvoice."I——Iamtakenquitebysurprise.Ishallhavetothinkitout——alone."
  Billydidnotsleepwellthatnight.AlwaysbeforehereyeswasthevisionofWilliam’sface;andalwaysinherearswastheechoofMrs.Hartwell’swords:"RememberhowgoodWilliamhasalwaysbeentoyou.Thinkofhisgreatsorrowyearsago.Thinkofthisdrearywasteofyearsbetween.Thinkhownowhishearthasturnedtoyouforloveandcomfortandrest."
  ForatimeBillytossedaboutonherbedtryingtoclosehereyestothevisionandherearstotheecho.Then,findingthatneitherwaspossible,shesetherselfearnestlytothinkingthematterout.
  Williamlovedher.Extraordinaryasitseemed,suchwasthefact;
  Mrs.Hartwellsaidso.Andnow——whatmustshedo;whatcouldshedo?Shelovednoone——ofthatshewasverysure.Shewasevenbeginningtothinkthatshewouldneverloveanyone.TherewereCalderwell,Cyril,Bertram,tosaynothingofsundryothers,whohadlovedher,apparently,butwhomshecouldnotlove.Suchbeingthecase,ifshewere,indeed,incapableofloveherself,whyshouldshenotmakethesacrificeofgivinguphercareer,herindependence,andinthatwaybringthisgreatjoytoUncleWilliam’sheart?Evenasshesaidthe"UncleWilliam"toherself,Billybitherlipandrealizedthatshemustnolongersay"Uncle"William——ifshemarriedhim.
  "Ifshemarriedhim."Thewordsstartledher."Ifshemarriedhim."Well,whatofit?ShewouldgotoliveattheStrata,ofcourse;andtherewouldbeCyrilandBertram.Itmightbeawkward,andyet——shedidnotbelieveCyrilwasinlovewithanythingbuthismusic;andastoBertram——itwasthesamewithBertramandhispainting,andhewouldsoonforgetthathehadeverfanciedhelovedher.Afterthathewouldbesimplyacongenialfriendandcompanion——agoodcomrade.AsBillythoughtofit,indeed,oneofthepleasantestfeaturesofthismarriagewithWilliamwouldbethedelightfulcomradeshipofher"brother,"
  Bertram.
  BillydweltthenatsomelengthonWilliam’sloveforher,hislongingforherpresence,andhisdrearyyearsofloneliness
  Andhewassogoodtoher,sherecollected;hehadalwaysbeengoodtoher.Hewasolder,tobesure——mucholderthanshe;but,afterall,itwouldnotbesodifficult,soverydifficult,tolearntolovehim.Atallevents,whateverhappened,shewouldhavethesupremesatisfactionofknowingthatatleastshehadbroughtintodearUncle——thatis,intoWilliam’slifethegreatpeaceandjoythatonlyshecouldgive.
  ItwasalmostdawnwhenBillyarrivedatthisnotuncheerfulstateofprospectivemartyrdom.Sheturnedoverthenwithasigh,andsettledherselftosleep.Shewasrelievedthatshehaddecidedthequestion.ShewasgladthatsheknewjustwhattosaywhenWilliamshouldspeak.Hewasadear,dearman,andshewouldnotmakeithardforhim,shepromisedherself.ShewouldbeWilliam’swife.
  CHAPTERXXXVI
  WILLIAMMEETSWITHASURPRISE
  Inspiteofhissister’sconfidentassurancethatthetimewasripeforhimtospeaktoBilly,Williamdelayedsomedaysbeforebroachingthemattertoher.HiscouragewasnotsogoodasithadbeenwhenhewastalkingwithKate.Itseemednow,asitalwayshad,afearsomethingtotrytohastenonthisloveaffairbetweenBillyandBertram.Hecouldnotsee,inspiteofKate’swords,thatBillyshowedunmistakableevidenceatallofbeinginlovewithhisbrother.Themorehethoughtofit,infact,themorehedreadedthecarryingoutofhispromisetospeaktohisnamesake.
  Whatshouldhesay,heaskedhimself.Howcouldhewordit?Hecouldnotverywellaccostherwith:"Oh,Billy,Iwishyou’dpleasehurryupandmarryBertram,becausethenyou’dcomeandlivewithme."NeithercouldhepleadBertram’scausedirectly.QuiteprobablyBertramwouldprefertopleadhisown.Then,too,ifBillyreallywasnotinlovewithBertram——whatthen?Mightnothisownuntimelyhasteinthematterforeverputanendtothechanceofhercaringforhim?
  Itwas,indeed,adelicatematter,andasWilliamponderedithewishedhimselfwelloutofit,andthatKatehadnotspoken.Butevenasheformedthewish,WilliamrememberedwithathrillKate’spositiveassertionthatawordfromhimwoulddowonders,andthatnowwasthetimetoutterit.Hedecidedthenthathewouldspeak;
  thathemustspeak;butthatatthesametimehewouldproceedwithacautionthatwouldpermitahastyretreatifhesawthathiswordswerenothavingthedesiredeffect.Hewouldbeginwithafrankconfessionofhisgriefatherleavinghim,andofhislongingforherreturn;thenverygradually,ifwisdomcounseledit,hewouldgoontospeakofBertram’sloveforher,andofhisownhopethatshewouldmakeBertramandalltheStratagladbylovinghiminreturn.
  Mrs.HartwellhadreturnedtoherWesternhomebeforeWilliamfoundjusttheopportunityforhistalkwithBilly.Truetohisbeliefthatonlyhushedvoicesandtwilightwerefittingforsuchasubject,hewaiteduntilhefoundthegirlearlyoneeveningaloneonhervine—shadedveranda.Henoticedthatasheseatedhimselfathersidesheflushedalittleandhalfstartedtorise,withanervousflutteringofherhands,andamurmured"I’llcallAuntHannah."Itwasthenthatwithsuddencourage,heresolvedtospeak.
  "Billy,don’tgo,"hesaidgently,withatouchofhishandonherarm."ThereissomethingIwanttosaytoyou.I——Ihavewantedtosayitforsometime."
  "Why,of——ofcourse,"stammeredthegirl,fallingbackinherseat.
  AndagainWilliamnoticedthatoddflutteringoftheslimlittlehands.
  Foratimenoonespoke,thenWilliambegansoftly,hiseyesonthedistantsky—linestillfaintlyaglowwiththesunset’sreflection.
  "Billy,Iwanttotellyouastory.Longyearsagotherewasamanwhohadahappyhomewithayoungwifeandatinybabyboyinit.
  Icouldnotbegintotellyoualltheplansthatmanmadeforthatbabyboy.Suchagreatandgoodandwonderfulbeingthattinybabywasonedaytobecome.Butthebaby——wentaway,afteratime,andcarriedwithhimalltheplans——andhenevercameback.Behindhimheleftemptyheartsthatached,andgreatbareroomsthatseemedalwaystobeechoingsighsandsobs.Andthen,oneday,suchafewyearsafter,theyoungwifewenttofindherbaby,andleftthemanallalonewiththeheartthatachedandthegreatbareroomsthatechoedsighsandsobs.
  "Perhapsitwasthis——thebarenessoftherooms——thatmadethemanturntohisboyishpassionforcollectingthings.Hewantedtofillthoseroomsfull,full!——sothatthesighsandsobscouldnotbeheard;andhewantedtofillhisheart,too,withsomethingthatwouldstilltheache.Andhetried.Alreadyhehadhisboyishtreasures,andthesehelinedupinbravearray,buthisroomsstillechoed,andhisheartstillached;sohebuiltmoreshelvesandboughtmorecabinets,andsethimselftofillingthem,hopingatthesametimethathemightfillallthatdrearywasteofhoursoutsideofbusiness——hourswhichoncehadbeenalltooshorttodevotetotheyoungwifeandthebabyboy.
  "Onebyonetheyearspassed,andonebyonetheshelvesandthecabinetswerefilled.Themanfancied,sometimes,thathehadsucceeded;butinhisheartofheartsheknewthattheachewasmerelydulled,andthatdarknesshadonlytocometosettheroomsoncemoretoechoingthesighsandsobs.Andthen——butperhapsyouaretiredofthestory,Billy."Williamturnedwithquestioningeyes.
  "No,oh,no,"falteredBilly."Itisbeautiful,butso——sad!"
  "Butthesaddestpartisdone——Ihope,"saidWilliam,softly."Letmetellyou.Awonderfulthinghappenedthen.Suddenly,rightoutofadullgrayskyofhopelessness,droppedalittlebrown—eyedgirlandalittlegraycat.Alloverthehousetheyfrolicked,fillingeverynookandcrannywithlaughterandlightandhappiness.Andthen,likemagic,themanlosttheacheinhisheart,andtheroomslosttheirechoingsighsandsobs.Themanknew,then,thatneveragaincouldhehopetofillhisheartandlifewithsenselessthingsofclayandmetal.Heknewthattheonethinghewantedalwaysnearhimwasthelittlebrown—eyedgirl;andhehopedthathecouldkeepher.Butjustashewasbeginningtobaskinthisnewlight——itwentout.Assuddenlyastheyhadcome,thelittlebrown—eyedgirlandthegraycatwentaway.Why,themandidnotknow.Heknewonlythattheachehadcomeback,doublyintense,andthattheroomsweremoregloomythanever.Andnow,Billy,"——William’svoiceshookalittle——"itisforyoutofinishthestory.Itisforyoutosaywhetherthatman’sheartshallacheonandondowntoalonelyoldage,andwhetherthoseroomsshallalwaysechothesighsandsobsofthepast."
  "AndIwillfinishit,"chokedBilly,holdingoutbothherhands.
  "Itsha’n’tache——theysha’n’techo!"
  Themanleanedforwardeagerly,unbelievingly,andcaughtthehandsinhisown.
  "Billy,doyoumeanit?Thenyouwill——come?"
  "Yes,yes!Ididn’tknow——Ididn’tthink.Ineversupposeditwaslikethat!OfcourseI’llcome!"Andinamomentshewassobbinginhisarms.
  "Billy!"breathedWilliamrapturously,ashetouchedhislipstoherforehead."MyownlittleBilly!"
  Itwasafewminuteslater,whenBillywasmorecalm,thatWilliamstartedtospeakofBertram.Foramomenthehadbeentemptednottomentionhisbrother,nowthathisownpointhadbeenwonsosurprisinglyquick;butthenewsoftnessinBilly’sfacehadencouragedhim,andhedidnotliketolettheoccasionpasswhenawordfromhimmightdosomuchforBertram.Hislipsparted,butnowordscame——Billyherselfhadbeguntospeak.
  "I’msureIdon’tknowwhyI’mcrying,"shestammered,dabbinghereyeswithherroundmoistballofahanderchief."IhopewhenI’myourwifeI’lllearntobemoreself—controlled.ButyouknowIamyoung,andyou’llhavetobepatient."
  AsoncebeforeatsomethingBillysaid,theworldtoWilliamwentsuddenlymad.Hisheadswamdizzily,andhisthroattightenedsothathecouldscarcelybreathe.BysheerforceofwillhekepthisarmaboutBilly’sshoulder,andheprayedthatshemightnotknowhownumbandcoldithadgrown.Eventhenhethoughthecouldnothaveheardaright.
  "Er——yousaid——"hequestionedfaintly.
  "IsaywhenI’myourwifeIhopeI’lllearntobemoreself—
  controlled,"laughedBilly,nervously."YouseeIjustthoughtI
  oughttoremindyouthatIamyoung,andthatyou’llhavetobepatient."
  Williamstammeredsomething——ahurriedsomething;hewonderedafterwardwhatitwas.ThatitmusthavebeensatisfactorytoBillywasevident,forshebeganlaughinglytotalkagain.Whatshesaid,Williamscarcelyknew,thoughhewasconsciousofmakinganoccasionalvaguereply.Hewasstillflounderinginahopelessseaofconfusionanddismay.Hisowndesirewastogetupandsaygoodnightatonce.Hewantedtobealonetothink.Herealized,however,withsickeningforce,thatmendonotproposeandrunaway——iftheyareaccepted.Andhewasaccepted;herealizedthat,too,overwhelmingly.Thenhetriedtothinkhowithadhappened,whathehadsaid;howshecouldsohavemisunderstoodhismeaning.