Shehadbegunbywatchingthewordsfromhislipswithamournfulregard,asthoughtheirpassagewerevisible;butashewentonshedroppedherglance。“Yes。”shesaid,“Ihavethoughtthat,too。And,becauseIhavethoughtit,Ibynomeansmeant,inspeakingoftheproprieties,tobereservedandcoldtoyouwholovedmesolongago,ortohurtyourheartasIusedtodoatthatthoughtlesstime。Oh,notatall,indeed!But——oughtItoallowyou?——oh,itistooquick——surely!”Hereyesfilledwithtearsofbewildered,alarmedemotion。
Winterbornewastoostraightforwardtoinfluenceherfurtheragainstherbetterjudgment。“Yes——Isupposeitis。”hesaid,repentantly。“I’llwaittillallissettled。Whatdidyourfathersayinthatlastletter?”
Hemeantabouthisprogresswiththepetition;butshe,mistakinghim,franklyspokeofthepersonalpart。“Hesaid——whatIhaveimplied。ShouldItellmoreplainly?”
“Ohno——don’t,ifitisasecret。”
“Notatall。Iwilltelleveryword,straightout,Giles,ifyouwish。HesaidIwastoencourageyou。There。ButIcannotobeyhimfurtherto-day。Come,letusgonow。”Shegentlyslidherhandfromhis,andwentinfrontofhimoutoftheAbbey。
“Iwasthinkingofgettingsomedinner。”saidWinterborne,changingtotheprosaic,astheywalked。“Andyou,too,mustrequiresomething。DoletmetakeyoutoaplaceIknow。”
Gracewasalmostwithoutafriendintheworldoutsideherfather’shouse;herlifewithFitzpiershadbroughthernosociety;hadsometimes,indeed,broughtherdeepersolitudeandinconsiderationthananyshehadeverknownbefore。Henceitwasatreattohertofindherselfagaintheobjectofthoughtfulcare。ButshequestionediftogopubliclytodinewithGilesWinterbornewerenotaproposal,duerathertohisunsophisticationthantohisdiscretion。Shesaidgentlythatshewouldmuchpreferhisorderingherlunchatsomeplaceandthencomingtotellheritwasready,whilesheremainedintheAbbeyporch。Gilessawhersecretreasoning,thoughthowhopelesslyblindtoproprietyhewasbesideher,andwenttodoasshewished。
Hewasnotabsentmorethantenminutes,andfoundGracewherehehadlefther。“Itwillbequitereadybythetimeyougetthere。”
hesaid,andtoldherthenameoftheinnatwhichthemealhadbeenordered,whichwasonethatshehadneverheardof。
“I’llfinditbyinquiry。”saidGrace,settingout。
“AndshallIseeyouagain?”
“Ohyes——cometomethere。Itwillnotbelikegoingtogether。I
shallwantyoutofindmyfather’smanandthegigforme。”
Hewaitedonsometenminutesoraquarterofanhour,tillhethoughtherlunchended,andthathemightfairlytakeadvantageofherinvitationtostartheronherwayhome。HewentstraighttoTheThreeTuns——alittletaverninasidestreet,scrupulouslyclean,buthumbleandinexpensive。Onhiswayhehadanoccasionalmisgivingastowhethertheplacehadbeenelegantenoughforher;andassoonasheenteredit,andsawherensconcedthere,heperceivedthathehadblundered。
Gracewasseatedintheonlydining-roomthatthesimpleoldhostelrycouldboastof,whichwasalsoageneralparloronmarket-days;along,lowapartment,withasandedfloorherring-
bonedwithabroom;awide,red-curtainedwindowtothestreet,andanothertothegarden。Gracehadretreatedtotheendoftheroomlookingoutuponthelatter,thefrontpartbeingfullofamixedcompanywhichhaddroppedinsincehewasthere。
Shewasinamoodofthegreatestdepression。Onarriving,andseeingwhatthetavernwaslike,shehadbeentakenbysurprise;
buthavinggonetoofartoretreat,shehadheroicallyenteredandsatdownonthewell-scrubbedsettle,oppositethenarrowtablewithitsknivesandsteelforks,tinpepper-boxes,bluesalt-
cellars,andpostersadvertisingthesaleofbullocksagainstthewall。ThelasttimethatshehadtakenanymealinapublicplaceithadbeenwithFitzpiersatthegrandnewEarlofWessexHotelinthattown,afteratwomonths’roamingandsojourningatthegigantichotelsoftheContinent。HowcouldshehaveexpectedanyotherkindofaccommodationinpresentcircumstancesthansuchasGileshadprovided?Andyethowunpreparedshewasforthischange!ThetastesthatshehadacquiredfromFitzpiershadbeenimbibedsosubtlythatshehardlyknewshepossessedthemtillconfrontedbythiscontrast。TheelegantFitzpiers,infact,atthatverymomentowedalongbillattheabove-mentionedhotelfortheluxuriousstyleinwhichheusedtoputheruptherewhenevertheydrovetoSherton。Butsuchissocialsentiment,thatshehadbeenquitecomfortableunderthosedebt-impendingconditions,whileshefelthumiliatedbyherpresentsituation,whichWinterbornehadpaidforhonestlyonthenail。
Hehadnoticedinamomentthatsheshrunkfromherposition,andallhispleasurewasgone。ItwasthesamesusceptibilityoveragainwhichhadspoiledhisChristmaspartylongago。
ButhedidnotknowthatthisrecrudescencewasonlythecasualresultofGrace’sapprenticeshiptowhatshewasdeterminedtolearninspiteofit——aconsequenceofoneofthosesuddensurpriseswhichconfronteverybodybentuponturningoveranewleaf。Shehadfinishedherlunch,whichhesawhadbeenaverymincingperformance;andhebroughtheroutofthehouseassoonashecould。
“Now。”hesaid,withgreatsadeyes,“youhavenotfinishedatallwell,Iknow。ComeroundtotheEarlofWessex。I’llorderateathere。Ididnotrememberthatwhatwasgoodenoughformewasnotgoodenoughforyou。”
Herfacefadedintoanaspectofdeepdistresswhenshesawwhathadhappened。“Ohno,Giles。”shesaid,withextremepathos;
“certainlynot。Whydoyou——saythatwhenyouknowbetter?YouEVERwillmisunderstandme。”
“Indeed,that’snotso,Mrs。Fitzpiers。CanyoudenythatyoufeltoutofplaceatTheThreeTuns?”
“Idon’tknow。Well,sinceyoumakemespeak,Idonotdenyit。”
“AndyetIhavefeltathometherethesetwentyyears。YourhusbandusedalwaystotakeyoutotheEarlofWessex,didhenot?”
“Yes。”shereluctantlyadmitted。Howcouldsheexplaininthestreetofamarket-townthatitwashersuperficialandtransitorytastewhichhadbeenoffended,andnothernatureorheraffection?Fortunately,orunfortunately,atthatmomenttheysawMelbury’smandrivingvacantlyalongthestreetinsearchofher,thehourhavingpassedatwhichhehadbeentoldtotakeherup。
Winterbornehailedhim,andshewaspowerlessthentoprolongthediscourse。Sheenteredthevehiclesadly,andthehorsetrottedaway。
AllnightdidWinterbornethinkoverthatunsatisfactoryendingofapleasanttime,forgettingthepleasanttimeitself。Hefearedanewthattheycouldneverbehappytogether,evenshouldshebefreetochoosehim。Shewasaccomplished;hewasunrefined。Itwastheoriginaldifficulty,whichhewastoosensitivetorecklesslyignore,assomemenwouldhavedoneinhisplace。
Hewasoneofthosesilent,unobtrusivebeingswhowantlittlefromothersinthewayoffavororcondescension,andperhapsonthatveryaccountscrutinizethoseothers’behaviortooclosely。
Hewasnotversatile,butoneinwhomahopeorbeliefwhichhadoncehaditsrise,meridian,anddeclineseldomagainexactlyrecurred,asinthebreastsofmoresanguinemortals。Hehadonceworshippedher,laidouthislifetosuither,wooedher,andlosther。Thoughitwaswithalmostthesamezest,itwaswithnotquitethesamehope,thathehadbeguntotreadtheoldtracksagain,andallowedhimselftobesocharmedwithherthatday。
Moveanothersteptowardsherhewouldnot。Hewouldevenrepulseher——asatributetoconscience。Itwouldbesheersintoletherprepareapitfallforherhappinessnotmuchsmallerthanthefirstbyinveiglingherintoaunionwithsuchashe。Herpoorfatherwasnowblindtothesesubtleties,whichhehadformerlybeheldasinnoontidelight。Itwashisowndutytodeclarethem——
forherdearsake。
Grace,too,hadaveryuncomfortablenight,andhersolicitousembarrassmentwasnotlessenedthenextmorningwhenanotherletterfromherfatherwasputintoherhands。Itstenorwasanintenserstrainoftheonethathadprecededit。Afterstatinghowextremelygladhewastohearthatshewasbetter,andabletogetout-of-doors,hewenton:
“Thisisawearisomebusiness,thesolicitorwehavecometoseebeingoutoftown。IdonotknowwhenIshallgethome。MygreatanxietyinthisdelayisstilllestyoushouldloseGilesWinterborne。Icannotrestatnightforthinkingthatwhileourbusinessishangingfirehemaybecomeestranged,orgoawayfromtheneighborhood。Ihavesetmyheartuponseeinghimyourhusband,ifyoueverhaveanother。Do,then,Grace,givehimsometemporaryencouragement,eventhoughitisover-early。ForwhenI
considerthepastIdothinkGodwillforgivemeandyouforbeingalittleforward。Ihaveanotherreasonforthis,mydear。I
feelmyselfgoingrapidlydownhill,andlateaffairshavestillfurtherhelpedmethatway。AnduntilthisthingisdoneIcannotrestinpeace。”
Headdedapostscript:
“Ihavejustheardthatthesolicitoristobeseento-morrow。
Possibly,therefore,Ishallreturnintheeveningafteryougetthis。”
Thepaternallongingranonallfourswithherowndesire;andyetinforwardingityesterdayshehadbeenonthebrinkofgivingoffence。Whilecravingtobeacountrygirlagainjustasherfatherrequested;toputofftheoldEve,thefastidiousmiss——orrathermadam——completely,herfirstattempthadbeenbeatenbytheunexpectedvitalityofthatfastidiousness。HerfatheronreturningandseeingthetriflingcoolnessofGileswouldbesuretosaythatthesameperversitywhichhadledhertomakedifficultiesaboutmarryingFitzpierswasnowpromptinghertoblowhotandcoldwithpoorWinterborne。
Ifthelatterhadbeenthemostsubtlehandattouchingthestopsofherdelicatesoulinsteadofonewhohadjustboundhimselftoletherdriftawayfromhimagainifshewouldonthewindofherestrangingeducation,hecouldnothaveactedmoreseductivelythanhedidthatday。Hechancedtobesuperintendingsometemporaryworkinafieldoppositeherwindows。Shecouldnotdiscoverwhathewasdoing,butshereadhismoodkeenlyandtruly:shecouldseeinhiscomingandgoinganairofdeterminedabandonmentofthewholelandscapethatlayinherdirection。
Oh,howshelongedtomakeitupwithhim!Herfathercomingintheevening——whichmeant,shesupposed,thatallformalitieswouldbeintrain,hermarriagevirtuallyannulled,andshebefreetobewonagain——howcouldshelookhiminthefaceifheshouldseethemestrangedthus?
ItwasafairgreeneveninginJune。Shewasseatedinthegarden,intherusticchairwhichstoodunderthelaurel-bushes——
madeofpeeledoak-branchesthatcametoMelbury’spremisesasrefuseafterbarking-time。Themassoffull-juicedleafageontheheightsaroundherwasjustswayedintofaintgesturesbyanearlyspentwindwhich,eveninitsenfeebledstate,didnotreachhershelter。AlldayshehadexpectedGilestocall——toinquirehowshehadgothome,orsomethingorother;buthehadnotcome。Andhestilltantalizedherbygoingathwartandacrossthatorchardopposite。Shecouldseehimasshesat。
AslightdiversionwaspresentlycreatedbyCreedlebringinghimaletter。SheknewfromthisthatCreedlehadjustcomefromSherton,andhadcalledasusualatthepost-officeforanythingthathadarrivedbytheafternoonpost,ofwhichtherewasnodeliveryatHintock。Sheponderedonwhatthelettermightcontain——particularlywhetheritwereasecondrefresherforWinterbornefromherfather,likeherownofthemorning。
Butitappearedtohavenobearinguponherselfwhatever。Gilesreaditscontents;andalmostimmediatelyturnedawaytoagapinthehedgeoftheorchard——ifthatcouldbecalledahedgewhich,owingtothedrippingsofthetrees,waslittlemorethanabankwithabushuponithereandthere。Heenteredtheplantation,andwasnodoubtgoingthatwayhomewardtothemysterioushutheoccupiedontheothersideofthewoodland。
ThesadsandswererunningswiftlythroughTime’sglass;shehadoftenfeltitintheselatterdays;and,likeGiles,shefeltitdoublynowafterthesolemnandpatheticreminderinherfather’scommunication。Herfreshnesswouldpass,thelong-sufferingdevotionofGilesmightsuddenlyend——mightendthatveryhour。
第53章