首页 >出版文学> The Varieties of Religious Experience>第18章
  Thereisthusaconsciousandvoluntarywayandaninvoluntaryandunconsciouswayinwhichmentalresultsmaygetaccomplished;
  andwefindbothwaysexemplifiedinthehistoryofconversion,givingustwotypes,whichStarbuckcallsthevolitionaltypeandthetypebyself-surrenderrespectively。
  Inthevolitionaltypetheregenerativechangeisusuallygradual,andconsistsinthebuildingup,piecebypiece,ofanewsetofmoralandspiritualhabits。Buttherearealwayscriticalpointshereatwhichthemovementforwardseemsmuchmorerapid。ThispsychologicalfactisabundantlyillustratedbyDr。Starbuck。Oureducationinanypracticalaccomplishmentproceedsapparentlybyjerksandstartsjustasthegrowthofourphysicalbodiesdoes。
  “Anathlete……sometimesawakenssuddenlytoanunderstandingofthefinepointsofthegameandtoarealenjoymentofit,justastheconvertawakenstoanappreciationofreligion。Ifhekeepsonengaginginthesport,theremaycomeadaywhenallatoncethegameplaysitselfthroughhim——whenheloseshimselfinsomegreatcontest。Inthesameway,amusicianmaysuddenlyreachapointatwhichpleasureinthetechniqueoftheartentirelyfallsaway,andinsomemomentofinspirationhebecomestheinstrumentthroughwhichmusicflows。Thewriterhaschancedtoheartwodifferentmarriedpersons,bothofwhoseweddedliveshadbeenbeautifulfromthebeginning,relatethatnotuntilayearormoreaftermarriagedidtheyawaketothefullblessednessofmarriedlife。Soitiswiththereligiousexperienceofthesepersonswearestudying。”[109]
  [109]PsychologyofReligion,p。385。Compare,also,pp。137-144
  and262。
  Weshallerelonghearstillmoreremarkableillustrationsofsubconsciouslymaturingprocesseseventuatinginresultsofwhichwesuddenlygrowconscious。SirWilliamHamiltonandProfessorLaycockofEdinburghwereamongthefirsttocallattentiontothisclassofeffects;butDr。Carpenterfirst,unlessIammistaken,introducedtheterm“unconsciouscerebration。”whichhassincethenbeenapopularphraseofexplanation。Thefactsarenowknowntousfarmoreextensivelythanhecouldknowthem,andtheadjective“unconscious。”beingformanyofthemalmostcertainlyamisnomer,isbetterreplacedbythevaguerterm“subconscious“or“subliminal。”
  Ofthevolitionaltypeofconversionitwouldbeeasytogiveexamples,[110]buttheyareasarulelessinterestingthanthoseoftheself-surrendertype,inwhichthesubconsciouseffectsaremoreabundantandoftenstartling。Iwillthereforehurrytothelatter,themoresobecausethedifferencebetweenthetwotypesisafterallnotradical。Eveninthemostvoluntarilybuilt-upsortofregenerationtherearepassagesofpartialself-surrenderinterposed;andinthegreatmajorityofallcases,whenthewillhaddoneitsuttermosttowardsbringingoneclosetothecompleteunificationaspiredafter,itseemsthattheverylaststepmustbelefttootherforcesandperformedwithoutthehelpofitsactivity。Inotherwords,self-surrenderbecomesthenindispensable。“Thepersonalwill。”
  saysDr。Starbuck,“mustbegivenup。Inmanycasesreliefpersistentlyrefusestocomeuntilthepersonceasestoresist,ortomakeaneffortinthedirectionhedesirestogo。”
  [110]Forinstance,C。G。Finneyitalicizesthevolitionalelement:“JustatthispointthewholequestionofGospelsalvationopenedtomymindinamannermostmarveloustomeatthetime。IthinkIthensaw,asclearlyasIeverhaveinmylife,therealityandfullnessoftheatonementofChrist。
  Gospelsalvationseemedtometobeanofferofsomethingtobeaccepted,andallthatwasnecessaryonmyparttogetmyownconsenttogiveupmysinsandacceptChrist。Afterthisdistinctrevelationhadstoodforsomelittletimebeforemymind,thequestionseemedtobeput,’willyouacceptitnow,to-day?’Ireplied,’Yes;Iwillacceptitto-day,orIwilldieintheattempt!’“Hethenwentintothewoods,wherehedescribeshisstruggles。Hecouldnotpray,hisheartwashardenedinitspride。“IthenreproachedmyselfforhavingpromisedtogivemyhearttoGodbeforeIleftthewoods。WhenI
  cametotry,IfoundIcouldnot……Myinwardsoulhungback,andtherewasnogoingoutofmyhearttoGod。Thethoughtwaspressingme,oftherashnessofmypromisethatIwouldgivemyhearttoGodthatday,ordieintheattempt。Itseemedtomeasifthatwasbindingonmysoul;andyetIwasgoingtobreakmyvow。Agreatsinkinganddiscouragementcameoverme,andI
  feltalmosttooweaktostanduponmyknees。JustatthismomentIagainthoughtIheardsomeoneapproachme,andIopenedmyeyestoseewhetheritwereso。Butrighttheretherevelationofmyprideofheart,asthegreatdifficultythatstoodintheway,wasdistinctlyshowntome。AnoverwhelmingsenseofmywickednessinbeingashamedtohaveahumanbeingseemeonmykneesbeforeGodtooksuchpowerfulpossessionofme,thatI
  criedatthetopofmyvoice,andexclaimedthatIwouldnotleavethatplaceifallthemenonearthandallthedevilsinhellsurroundedme。’What!’Isaid,’suchadegradedsinnerasI
  am,onmykneesconfessingmysinstothegreatandholyGod;andashamedtohaveanyhumanbeing,andasinnerlikemyself,findmeonmykneesendeavoringtomakemypeacewithmyoffendedGod!’Thesinappearedawful,infinite。ItbrokemedownbeforetheLord。”Memoirs,pp。14-16,abridged。
  “IhadsaidIwouldnotgiveup;butwhenmywillwasbroken,itwasallover。”writesoneofStarbuck’scorrespondents——Anothersays:“Isimplysaid:’Lord,IhavedoneallIcan;IleavethewholematterwithThee,’andimmediatelytherecametomeagreatpeace。”——Another:“AllatonceitoccurredtomethatImightbesaved,too,ifIwouldstoptryingtodoitallmyself,andfollowJesus:somehowIlostmyload。”——Another:“Ifinallyceasedtoresist,andgavemyselfup,thoughitwasahardstruggle。GraduallythefeelingcameovermethatIhaddonemypart,andGodwaswillingtodohis。”[111]——“LordThywillbedone;damnorsave!”criesJohnNelson,[112]exhaustedwiththeanxiousstruggletoescapedamnation;andatthatmomenthissoulwasfilledwithpeace。
  [111]Starbuck:Op。cit。,pp。91,114。
  [112]ExtractsfromtheJournalofMr。JohnNelson,London,nodate,p。24。
  Dr。Starbuckgivesaninteresting,anditseemstomeatrue,account——sofarasconceptionssoschematiccanclaimtruthatall——ofthereasonswhyself-surrenderatthelastmomentshouldbesoindispensable。Tobeginwith,therearetwothingsinthemindofthecandidateforconversion:first,thepresentincompletenessorwrongness,the“sin“whichheiseagertoescapefrom;and,second,thepositiveidealwhichhelongstocompass。Nowwithmostofusthesenseofourpresentwrongnessisafarmoredistinctpieceofourconsciousnessthanistheimaginationofanypositiveidealwecanaimat。Inamajorityofcases,indeed,the“sin“almostexclusivelyengrossestheattention,sothatconversionis“aprocessofstrugglingawayfromsinratherthanofstrivingtowardsrighteousness。”[113]A
  man’sconsciouswitandwill,sofarastheystraintowardstheideal,areaimingatsomethingonlydimlyandinaccuratelyimagined。Yetallthewhiletheforcesofmereorganicripeningwithinhimaregoingontowardstheirownprefiguredresult,andhisconsciousstrainingsarelettingloosesubconsciousalliesbehindthescenes,whichintheirwayworktowardsrearrangement;
  andtherearrangementtowardswhichallthesedeeperforcestendisprettysurelydefinite,anddefinitelydifferentfromwhatheconsciouslyconceivesanddetermines。ItmayconsequentlybeactuallyinterferedwithJAMMED,asitwere,likethelostwordwhenweseektooenergeticallytorecallit,byhisvoluntaryeffortsslantingfromthetruedirection。
  [113]Starbuck,p。64。
  Starbuckseemstoputhisfingerontherootofthematterwhenhesaysthattoexercisethepersonalwillisstilltoliveintheregionwheretheimperfectselfisthethingmostemphasized。
  Where,onthecontrary,thesubconsciousforcestakethelead,itismoreprobablythebetterselfinpossewhichdirectstheoperation。Insteadofbeingclumsilyandvaguelyaimedatfromwithout,itisthenitselftheorganizingcentre。Whatthenmustthepersondo?“Hemustrelax。”saysDr。Starbuck——“thatis,hemustfallbackonthelargerPowerthatmakesforrighteousness,whichhasbeenwellingupinhisownbeing,andletitfinishinitsownwaytheworkithasbegun……Theactofyielding,inthispointofview,isgivingone’sselfovertothenewlife,makingitthecentreofanewpersonality,andliving,fromwithin,thetruthofitwhichhadbeforebeenviewedobjectively。”[114]
  [114]Starbuck,p。115。
  “Man’sextremityisGod’sopportunity“isthetheologicalwayofputtingthisfactoftheneedofself-surrender;whilstthephysiologicalwayofstatingitwouldbe,“Letonedoallinone’spower,andone’snervoussystemwilldotherest。”Bothstatementsacknowledgethesamefact。[115]
  [115]Starbuck,p。113。
  Tostateitintermsofourownsymbolism:Whenthenewcentreofpersonalenergyhasbeensubconsciouslyincubatedsolongastobejustreadytoopenintoflower,“handsoff“istheonlywordforus,itmustburstforthunaided!
  Wehaveusedthevagueandabstractlanguageofpsychology。Butsince,inanyterms,thecrisisdescribedisthethrowingofourconsciousselvesuponthemercyofpowerswhich,whatevertheymaybe,aremoreidealthanweareactually,andmakeforourredemption,youseewhyself-surrenderhasbeenandalwaysmustberegardedasthevitalturning-pointofthereligiouslife,sofarasthereligiouslifeisspiritualandnoaffairofouterworksandritualandsacraments。OnemaysaythatthewholedevelopmentofChristianityininwardnesshasconsistedinlittlemorethanthegreaterandgreateremphasisattachedtothiscrisisofself-surrender。FromCatholicismtoLutheranism,andthentoCalvinism;fromthattoWesleyanism;andfromthis,outsideoftechnicalChristianityaltogether,topure“liberalism“ortranscendentalidealism,whetherornotofthemind-curetype,takinginthemediaevalmystics,thequietists,thepietists,andquakersbytheway,wecantracethestagesofprogresstowardstheideaofanimmediatespiritualhelp,experiencedbytheindividualinhisforlornnessandstandinginnoessentialneedofdoctrinalapparatusorpropitiatorymachinery。
  Psychologyandreligionarethusinperfectharmonyuptothispoint,sincebothadmitthatthereareforcesseeminglyoutsideoftheconsciousindividualthatbringredemptiontohislife。
  Neverthelesspsychology,definingtheseforcesas“subconscious。”
  andspeakingoftheireffects,asdueto“incubation。”or“cerebration。”impliesthattheydonottranscendtheindividual’spersonality;andhereinshedivergesfromChristiantheology,whichinsiststhattheyaredirectsupernaturaloperationsoftheDeity。Iproposetoyouthatwedonotyetconsiderthisdivergencefinal,butleavethequestionforawhileinabeyance——continuedinquirymayenableustogetridofsomeoftheapparentdiscord。
  Revert,then,foramomentmoretothepsychologyofself-surrender。
  Whenyoufindamanlivingontheraggededgeofhisconsciousness,pentintohissinandwantandincompleteness,andconsequentlyinconsolable,andthensimplytellhimthatalliswellwithhim,thathemuststophisworry,breakwithhisdiscontent,andgiveuphisanxiety,youseemtohimtocomewithpureabsurdities。TheonlypositiveconsciousnesshehastellshimthatallisNOTwell,andthebetterwayyouoffersoundssimplyasifyouproposedtohimtoassertcold-bloodedfalsehoods。“Thewilltobelieve“cannotbestretchedasfarasthat。Wecanmakeourselvesmorefaithfultoabeliefofwhichwehavetherudiments,butwecannotcreateabeliefoutofwholeclothwhenourperceptionactivelyassuresusofitsopposite。
  Thebettermindproposedtouscomesinthatcaseintheformofapurenegationoftheonlymindwehave,andwecannotactivelywillapurenegation。
  Thereareonlytwowaysinwhichitispossibletogetridofanger,worry,fear,despair,orotherundesirableaffections。
  Oneisthatanoppositeaffectionshouldoverpoweringlybreakoverus,andtheotherisbygettingsoexhaustedwiththestrugglethatwehavetostop——sowedropdown,giveup,andDON’TCAREanylonger。Ouremotionalbrain-centresstrikework,andwelapseintoatemporaryapathy。Nowthereisdocumentaryproofthatthisstateoftemporaryexhaustionnotinfrequentlyformspartoftheconversioncrisis。Solongastheegoisticworryofthesicksoulguardsthedoor,theexpansiveconfidenceofthesouloffaithgainsnopresence。Butlettheformerfaintaway,evenbutforamoment,andthelattercanprofitbytheopportunity,and,havingonceacquiredpossession,mayretainit。
  Carlyle’sTeufelsdrockhpassesfromtheeverlastingNototheeverlastingYesthrougha“CentreofIndifference。”
  Letmegiveyouagoodillustrationofthisfeatureintheconversionprocess。Thatgenuinesaint,DavidBrainerd,describeshisowncrisisinthefollowingwords: