“Theology。”saysDr。Starbuck,“takestheadolescenttendenciesandbuildsuponthem;itseesthattheessentialthinginadolescentgrowthisbringingthepersonoutofchildhoodintothenewlifeofmaturityandpersonalinsight。Itaccordinglybringsthosemeanstobearwhichwillintensifythenormaltendencies。Itshortensuptheperiodofdurationofstormandstress。”Theconversionphenomenaof“convictionofsin“last,bythisinvestigator’sstatistics,aboutonefifthaslongastheperiodsofadolescentstormandstressphenomenaofwhichhealsogotstatistics,buttheyareverymuchmoreintense。Bodilyaccompaniments,lossofsleepandappetite,forexample,aremuchmorefrequentinthem。“Theessentialdistinctionappearstobethatconversionintensifiesbutshortenstheperiodbybringingthepersontoadefinitecrisis。”[101]
[101]E。D。Starbuck:ThePsychologyofReligion,pp。224,262。
TheconversionswhichDr。Starbuckherehasinmindareofcoursemainlythoseofverycommonplacepersons,kepttruetoapre-appointedtypebyinstruction,appeal,andexample。Theparticularformwhichtheyaffectistheresultofsuggestionandimitation。[102]Iftheywentthroughtheirgrowth-crisisinotherfaithsandothercountries,althoughtheessenceofthechangewouldbethesamesinceitisoneinthemainsoinevitable,itsaccidentswouldbedifferent。InCatholiclands,forexample,andinourownEpiscopaliansects,nosuchanxietyandconvictionofsinisusualasinsectsthatencouragerevivals。Thesacramentsbeingmorereliedoninthesemorestrictlyecclesiasticalbodies,theindividual’spersonalacceptanceofsalvationneedslesstobeaccentuatedandledupto。
[102]NooneunderstandsthisbetterthanJonathanEdwardsunderstooditalready。Conversionnarrativesofthemorecommonplacesortmustalwaysbetakenwiththeallowanceswhichhesuggests:
“Arulereceivedandestablishedbycommonconsenthasaverygreat,thoughtomanypersonsaninsensibleinfluenceinformingtheirnotionsoftheprocessoftheirownexperience。Iknowverywellhowtheyproceedastothismatter,forIhavehadfrequentopportunitiesofobservingtheirconduct。Veryoftentheirexperienceatfirstappearslikeaconfusedchaos,butthenthosepartsareselectedwhichbearthenearestresemblancetosuchparticularstepsasareinsistedon;andthesearedweltuponintheirthoughts,andspokenoffromtimetotime,tilltheygrowmoreandmoreconspicuousintheirview,andotherpartswhichareneglectedgrowmoreandmoreobscure。Thuswhattheyhaveexperiencedisinsensiblystrained,soastobringittoanexactconformitytotheschemealreadyestablishedintheirminds。Anditbecomesnaturalalsoforministers,whohavetodealwiththosewhoinsistupondistinctnessandclearnessofmethod,todosotoo。”TreatiseonReligiousAffections。
Buteveryimitativephenomenonmustoncehavehaditsoriginal,andIproposethatforthefuturewekeepascloseasmaybetothemorefirst-handandoriginalformsofexperience。Thesearemorelikelytobefoundinsporadicadultcases。
ProfessorLeuba,inavaluablearticleonthepsychologyofconversion,[103]subordinatesthetheologicalaspectofthereligiouslifealmostentirelytoitsmoralaspect。Thereligioussensehedefinesas“thefeelingofunwholeness,ofmoralimperfection,ofsin,tousethetechnicalword,accompaniedbytheyearningafterthepeaceofunity。”“Theword’religion,’“hesays,“isgettingmoreandmoretosignifytheconglomerateofdesiresandemotionsspringingfromthesenseofsinanditsrelease“;andhegivesalargenumberofexamples,inwhichthesinrangesfromdrunkennesstospiritualpride,toshowthatthesenseofitmaybesetoneandcravereliefasurgentlyasdoestheanguishofthesickenedfleshoranyformofphysicalmisery。
[103]StudiesinthePsychologyofReligiousPhenomena,AmericanJournalofPsychology,vii。3091896。
Undoubtedlythisconceptioncoversanimmensenumberofcases。A
goodonetouseasanexampleisthatofMr。S。H。Hadley,whoafterhisconversionbecameanactiveandusefulrescuerofdrunkardsinNewYork。Hisexperiencerunsasfollows:——
“OneTuesdayeveningIsatinasalooninHarlem,ahomeless,friendless,dyingdrunkard。Ihadpawnedorsoldeverythingthatwouldbringadrink。IcouldnotsleepunlessIwasdeaddrunk。
Ihadnoteatenfordays,andforfournightsprecedingIhadsufferedwithdeliriumtremens,orthehorrors,frommidnighttillmorning。Ihadoftensaid,’Iwillneverbeatramp。I
willneverbecornered,forwhenthattimecomes,ifeveritcomes,Iwillfindahomeinthebottomoftheriver。’ButtheLordsoordereditthatwhenthattimedidcomeIwasnotabletowalkonequarterofthewaytotheriver。AsIsattherethinking,Iseemedtofeelsomegreatandmightypresence。Ididnotknowthenwhatitwas。IdidlearnafterwardsthatitwasJesus,thesinner’sfriend。IwalkeduptothebarandpoundeditwithmyfisttillImadetheglassesrattle。Thosewhostoodbydrinkinglookedonwithscornfulcuriosity。IsaidIwouldnevertakeanotherdrink,ifIdiedonthestreet,andreallyI
feltasthoughthatwouldhappenbeforemorning。Somethingsaid,’Ifyouwanttokeepthispromise,goandhaveyourselflockedup。’Iwenttotheneareststation-houseandhadmyselflockedup。
“Iwasplacedinanarrowcell,anditseemedasthoughallthedemonsthatcouldfindroomcameinthatplacewithme。ThiswasnotallthecompanyIhad,either。No,praisetheLord:thatdearSpiritthatcametomeinthesaloonwaspresent,andsaid,Pray。Ididpray,andthoughIdidnotfeelanygreathelp,Ikeptonpraying。AssoonasIwasabletoleavemycellIwastakentothepolicecourtandremandedbacktothecell。I
wasfinallyreleased,andfoundmywaytomybrother’shouse,whereeverycarewasgivenme。WhilelyinginbedtheadmonishingSpiritneverleftme,andwhenIarosethefollowingSabbathmorningIfeltthatdaywoulddecidemyfate,andtowardeveningitcameintomyheadtogotoJerryM’Auley’sMission。I
went。Thehousewaspacked,andwithgreatdifficultyImademywaytothespaceneartheplatform。ThereIsawtheapostletothedrunkardandtheoutcast——thatmanofGod,JerryM’Auley。Herose,andamiddeepsilencetoldhisexperience。Therewasasincerityaboutthismanthatcarriedconvictionwithit,andI
foundmyselfsaying,’IwonderifGodcansaveme?’Ilistenedtothetestimonyoftwenty-fiveorthirtypersons,everyoneofwhomhadbeensavedfromrum,andImadeupmymindthatIwouldbesavedordierightthere。Whentheinvitationwasgiven,I
kneltdownwithacrowdofdrunkards。Jerrymadethefirstprayer。ThenMrs。M’Auleyprayedferventlyforus。Oh,whataconflictwasgoingonformypoorsoul!Ablessedwhispersaid,’Come’;thedevilsaid,’Becareful。’Ihaltedbutamoment,andthen,withabreakingheart,Isaid,’DearJesus,canyouhelpme?’NeverwithmortaltonguecanIdescribethatmoment。
Althoughuptothatmomentmysoulhadbeenfilledwithindescribablegloom,Ifeltthegloriousbrightnessofthenoondaysunshineintomyheart。IfeltIwasafreeman。Oh,thepreciousfeelingofsafety,offreedom,ofrestingonJesus!
IfeltthatChristwithallhisbrightnessandpowerhadcomeintomylife;that,indeed,oldthingshadpassedawayandallthingshadbecomenew。
“FromthatmomenttillnowIhaveneverwantedadrinkofwhiskey,andIhaveneverseenmoneyenoughtomakemetakeone。
IpromisedGodthatnightthatifhewouldtakeawaytheappetiteforstrongdrink,Iwouldworkforhimallmylife。Hehasdonehispart,andIhavebeentryingtodomine。”[104]
[104]IhaveabridgedMr。Hadley’saccount。Forotherconversionsofdrunkards,seehispamphlet,RescueMissionWork,publishedattheOldJerryM’AuleyWaterStreetMission,NewYorkCity。AstrikingcollectionofcasesalsoappearsintheappendixtoProfessorLeuba’sarticle。
Dr。Leubarightlyremarksthatthereislittledoctrinaltheologyinsuchanexperience,whichstartswiththeabsoluteneedofahigherhelper,andendswiththesensethathehashelpedus。Hegivesothercasesofdrunkards’conversionswhicharepurelyethical,containing,asrecorded,notheologicalbeliefswhatever。JohnB。Gough’scase,forinstance,ispractically,saysDr。Leuba,theconversionofanatheist——neitherGodnorJesusbeingmentioned。[105]Butinspiteoftheimportanceofthistypeofregeneration,withlittleornointellectualreadjustment,thiswritersurelymakesittooexclusive。Itcorrespondstothesubjectivelycenteredformofmorbidmelancholy,ofwhichBunyanandAllinewereexamples。Butwesawinourseventhlecturethatthereareobjectiveformsofmelancholyalso,inwhichthelackofrationalmeaningoftheuniverse,andoflifeanyhow,istheburdenthatweighsuponone——yourememberTolstoy’scase。[106]Sotherearedistinctelementsinconversion,andtheirrelationstoindividuallivesdeservetobediscriminated。[107]
[105]ArestaurantwaiterservedprovisionallyasGough’s’Saviour。’GeneralBooth,thefounderoftheSalvationArmy,considersthatthefirstvitalstepinsavingoutcastsconsistsinmakingthemfeelthatsomedecenthumanbeingcaresenoughforthemtotakeaninterestinthequestionwhethertheyaretoriseorsink。
[106]Thecrisisofapatheticmelancholy——nouseinlife——intowhichJ。S。Millrecordsthathefell,fromwhichheemergedbythereadingofMarmontel’sMemoirsHeavensavethemark!andWordsworth’spoetry,isanotherintellectualandgeneralmetaphysicalcase。SeeMill’sAutobiography,NewYork,
Starbuck,inadditionto“escapefromsin。”discriminates“spiritualillumination“asadistincttypeofconversionexperience。PsychologyofReligion,p。
Somepersons,forinstance,neverare,andpossiblyneverunderanycircumstancescouldbe,converted。Religiousideascannotbecomethecentreoftheirspiritualenergy。Theymaybeexcellentpersons,servantsofGodinpracticalways,buttheyarenotchildrenofhiskingdom。Theyareeitherincapableofimaginingtheinvisible;orelse,inthelanguageofdevotion,theyarelife-longsubjectsof“barrenness“and“dryness。”
Suchinaptitudeforreligiousfaithmayinsomecasesbeintellectualinitsorigin。Theirreligiousfacultiesmaybecheckedintheirnaturaltendencytoexpand,bybeliefsabouttheworldthatareinhibitive,thepessimisticandmaterialisticbeliefs,forexample,withinwhichsomanygoodsouls,whoinformertimeswouldhavefreelyindulgedtheirreligiouspropensities,findthemselvesnowadays,asitwere,frozen;ortheagnosticvetoesuponfaithassomethingweakandshameful,underwhichsomanyofustodayliecowering,afraidtouseourinstincts。Inmanypersonssuchinhibitionsareneverovercome。
Totheendoftheirdaystheyrefusetobelieve,theirpersonalenergynevergetstoitsreligiouscentre,andthelatterremainsinactiveinperpetuity。
Inotherpersonsthetroubleisprofounder。Therearemenanaestheticonthereligiousside,deficientinthatcategoryofsensibility。Justasabloodlessorganismcannever,inspiteofallitsgoodwill,attaintothereckless“animalspirits“enjoyedbythoseofsanguinetemperament;sothenaturewhichisspirituallybarrenmayadmireandenvyfaithinothers,butcannevercompasstheenthusiasmandpeacewhichthosewhoaretemperamentallyqualifiedforfaithenjoy。Allthismay,however,turnouteventuallytohavebeenamatteroftemporaryinhibition。Evenlateinlifesomethaw,somereleasemaytakeplace,someboltbeshotbackinthebarrenestbreast,andtheman’shardheartmaysoftenandbreakintoreligiousfeeling。
Suchcasesmorethananyotherssuggesttheideathatsuddenconversionisbymiracle。Solongastheyexist,wemustnotimagineourselvestodealwithirretrievablyfixedclasses。
Nowtherearetwoformsofmentaloccurrenceinhumanbeings,whichleadtoastrikingdifferenceintheconversionprocess,adifferencetowhichProfessorStarbuckhascalledattention。Youknowhowitiswhenyoutrytorecollectaforgottenname。
Usuallyyouhelptherecallbyworkingforit,bymentallyrunningovertheplaces,persons,andthingswithwhichthewordwasconnected。Butsometimesthiseffortfails:youfeelthenasiftheharderyoutriedthelesshopetherewouldbe,asthoughthenamewereJAMMED,andpressureinitsdirectiononlykeptitallthemorefromrising。Andthentheoppositeexpedientoftensucceeds。Giveuptheeffortentirely;thinkofsomethingaltogetherdifferent,andinhalfanhourthelostnamecomessaunteringintoyourmind,asEmersonsays,ascarelesslyasifithadneverbeeninvited。Somehiddenprocesswasstartedinyoubytheeffort,whichwentonaftertheeffortceased,andmadetheresultcomeasifitcamespontaneously。Acertainmusicteacher,saysDr。Starbuck,saystoherpupilsafterthethingtobedonehasbeenclearlypointedout,andunsuccessfullyattempted:“Stoptryinganditwilldoitself!”[108]