“Nonsense。”saidGeoffreyangrily,butneverthelesshefeltthatLadyHonoria’swordswerewordsoftruth。Itstruckhim,moreover,thatshemustfeelthisstrongly,orshewouldnothavespokeninthattone。
Honoriadidnotposeasahouseholdphilosopher。Stillhewouldnotdrawbacknow。HisheartwassetonseeingBeatrice。
“AmItounderstand。”wentonhiswife,“thatyoustillobjecttomystayingwiththeGarsingtons?IthinkitisalittlehardifIdonotmakeafussaboutyourgoingtoseeyourvillageparagon,thatyoushouldrefusetoallowmetovisitmyownbrother。”
Geoffreyfeltthathewasbeingbargainedwith。Itwasdegrading,butintheextremityofhisfollyheyielded。
“Goifyoulike。”hesaidshortly,“butifyoutakeEffie,mindsheisproperlylookedafter,thatisall。”andheabruptlylefttheroom。
LadyHonorialookedafterhim,slowlynoddingherhandsomehead。“Ah。”
shesaidtoherself,“Ihavefoundouthowtomanageyounow。Youhaveyourweakpointlikeotherpeople,MasterGeoffrey——anditspellsBeatrice。Onlyyoumustnotgotoofar。Iamnotjealous,butIamnotgoingtohaveascandalforfiftyBeatrices。Iwillnotallowyoutoloseyourreputationandposition。Justimagineamanlikethatpiningforavillagegirl——sheisnothingmore!Andtheytalkabouthisbeingsoclever。Well,healwayslikedladies’society;thatishisfailing,andnowhehasburnthisfingers。Theyalldosoonerorlater,especiallytheseclevermen。Thewomenflatterthem,that’sit。Ofcoursethegirlistryingtogetholdofhim,andshemightdoworse,butsosurelyasmynameisHonoriaBinghamIwillputaspokeinherwheelbeforeshehasdone。Bah!andtheylaughatthepowerofwomenwhenamanlikeGeoffrey,withalltheworldtolose,growslove-sickforaprettyface;itisa/very/prettyfacebytheway。IdobelievethatifIwereoutofthewayhewouldmarryher。ButIamintheway,andmeantostaythere。Well,itistimetodressfordinner。Ionlyhopethatoldclownofaclergymanwon’tdosomethingridiculous。I
shallhavetoapologiseforhim。”
Dinner-timehadcome;itwasaquarterpasteight,andtheroomwasfilledwithhighlybredpeopleallmoreorlessdistinguished。Mr。
Grangerhaddulyappeared,arrayedinhisthreadbareblackcoat,relieved,however,byapairofGeoffrey’sdressshoes。Asmighthavebeenexpected,thegreatfolkdidnotseemsurprisedathispresence,ortotakeanyparticularnoticeofhisattire,thefactbeingthatsuchpeopleneveraresurprised。AZuluchiefinfullwardresswouldonlyexciteafriendlyinterestintheirbreasts。Onthecontrarytheyrecognisedvaguelythattheoldgentlemanwassomethingoutofthecommonrun,andassuchworthcultivating。IndeedthePrimeMinister,hearingcasuallythathewasaclergymanfromWales,askedtobeintroducedtohim,andatoncefellintoconversationabouttithes,asubjectofwhichMr。Grangerwasthoroughlymaster。
Presentlytheywentdowntodinner,Mr。GrangerescortingthewifeoftheBishop,afatandsomewhatapoplecticlady,blessedwithanexcellentappetite。OnhisothersidewasthePrimeMinister,andbetweenthetwohegotonverywell,especiallyafterafewglassesofwine。Indeed,boththeapoplecticwifeoftheBishopandtheheadofHerMajesty’sGovernmentweresubsequentlyheardtodeclarethatMr。
Grangerwasaveryentertainingperson。Totheformerherelatedwithmuchdetailhowhisdaughterhadsavedtheirhost’slife,andtothelatterhediscourseduponthesubjectoftithes,favouringhimwithhisideasofwhatlegislationwasnecessarytomeetthequestion。
Somewhattohisownsurprise,hefoundthathisviewswerereceivedwithattentionandevenwithrespect。Inthemain,too,theyreceivedthesupportoftheBishop,wholikewisefeltkeenlyonthesubjectoftithes。NeverbeforehadMr。Grangerhadsuchagooddinnernormingledwithcompanysodistinguished。Herememberedbothtillhisdyingday。
NextmorningGeoffreyandMr。GrangerstartedbeforeLadyHonoriawasup。IntothedetailsoftheirlongjourneytoWalesinacrowdedthird-classcarriageweneednotenter。Geoffreyhadplentytothinkof,buthisfearshadvanished,asfearssometimesdowhenwedrawneartotheobjectofthem,andhadbeenreplacedbyacuriousexpectancy。Hesawnow,orthoughthesaw,thathehadbeenmakingamountainoutofamolehill。Probablyitmeantnothingatall。Therewasnorealdanger。Beatricelikedhim,nodoubt;possiblyshehadevenexperiencedafitoftendernesstowardshim。Suchthingscomeandsuchthingsgo。Timeisawonderfulhealerofmoraldistempers,andfewyoungladiesendurethechainsofanundesirableattachmentforaperiodofsevenwholemonths。Itmadehimalmostblushtothinkthatthismightbeso,andthatthegratuitousextensionofhismisfortunetoBeatricemightbenothingmorethantheworkingofhisownunconsciousvanity——avanitywhich,didsheknowofit,wouldmovehertoangrylaughter。
Herememberedhowonce,whenhewasquiteayoungfellow,hehadbeensomewhatsmittenwithacertainlady,whocertainly,ifhemightjudgefromherwordsandacts,reciprocatedthesentiment。Andherememberedalso,howwhenhemetthatladysomemonthsafterwardsshetreatedhimwithacoldindifference,indeedalmostwithaninsolence,thatquitebewilderedhim,makinghimwonderhowthesamepersoncouldshowinsuchdifferentlights,tillatlength,mortifiedandashamedbyhismistake,hehadgoneawayinarageandseenherfacenomore。Ofcoursehehadsetitdowntofemaleinfidelity;hehadservedherturn,shehadmadeafoolofhim,andthatwasallshewanted。Nowhemightenjoyhishumiliation。Itdidnotoccurtohimthatitmightbesimple“cussedness。”toborrowanenergeticAmericanterm,orthatshehadnotreallychanged,butwasangrywithhimforsomereasonwhichshedidnotchoosetoshow。Itisdifficulttoweighthemotivesofwomeninthescalesofmaleexperience,andmanyothermenbesidesGeoffreyhavebeenforcedtogiveuptheattemptandtoconsolethemselveswiththereflectionthattheinexplicableisgenerallynotworthunderstanding。
Yes,probablyitwouldbethesamecaseoveragain。Andyet,andyet——
wasBeatriceofthatclass?Hadshenottoomuchofaman’sstraightforwardnessofaimtopermithertoplaysuchtricks?Inthebottomofhissoulhethoughtthatshehad,buthewouldnotadmitittohimself。Thefactofthematterwasthat,halfunknowingly,hewastryingtodrughisconscience。Heknewthatinhislongingtoseeherdearfaceoncemorehehadundertakenadangerousthing。Hewasabouttowalkwithheroveranabyssonabridgewhichmightbearthem,or——
mightbreak。Solongashewalkedtherealoneitwouldbewell,butwoulditbearthem/both?/Alasforthefrailtyofhumannature,thiswasthetruth;buthewouldnotanddidnotacknowledgeit。HewasnotgoingtomakelovetoBeatrice,hewasgoingtoenjoythepleasureofhersociety。Infriendshiptherecouldbenoharm。
Itisnotdifficultthustostillthequalmsofanuneasymind,moreespeciallywhenthethinginquestionatitsworstisratheranoffenceagainstlocalcustomthanagainstnaturallaw。Inmanycountriesoftheworld——innearlyallcountries,indeed,atdifferentepochsoftheirhistory——itwouldhavebeennowrongthatGeoffreyandBeatriceshouldloveeachother,andhumannatureinstrongtemptationisveryapttooverrideartificialbarrierserectedtosuittheconvenienceorpromotetheprosperityofparticularsectionsofmankind。But,aswehaveheard,eventhoughallthingsmaybelawful,yetallthingsarenotexpedient。Tocommitoreventocondoneanactbecausetheprinciplethatstampsitaswrongwilladmitofargumentonitsmeritsismeresophistry,bytheaidofwhichwemightproveourselvesentitledtodefythemajorityoflawsofallcalibres。Lawsvarytosuitthegenerations,buteachgenerationmustobeyitsown,orconfusionwillensue。Adeedshouldbejudgedbyitsfruits;itmayevenbeinnocentinitself,yetifitsfruitsareevilthedoerinasenseisguilty。
Thusinsomecountriestomentionthenameofyourmother-in-lawentailsthemostunpleasantconsequencesonthatintimaterelation。
Nobodycansaythattonametheladyisathingwickedinitself;yetthemanwho,knowingthepenaltieswhichwillensue,allowshimself,eveninafitofpassionagainstthatrelative,toviolatethecustomandmentionherbynameisdoubtlessanoffender。Thus,too,theresultofanentanglementbetweenawomanandamanalreadymarriedgenerallymeansunhappinessandhurttoallconcerned,moreespeciallytothewomen,whoseprospectsareperhapsirretrievablyinjuredthereby。Itisuselesstopointtotheexampleofthepatriarchs,someforeignroyalfamilies,andmanyrespectableTurks;itisuselesstopleadthattheloveisdeepandholylove,forwhichamanorwomanmightwellliveanddie,ortoshowextenuatingcircumstancesinthefactofloneliness,needofsympathy,andthattheexistingmarriageisahollowsham。Theruleisclear。Amanmaydomostthingsexceptcheatatcardsorrunawayinaction;awomanmaybreakhalf-a-dozenhearts,ortrytobreakthem,andfinallyputherselfupatauctionandtakenoharmatall——butneitherofthemmayinanyeventdo/this/。
NotthatGeoffrey,todohimjustice,hadanysuchintentions。Mostmenareincapableofplotsofthatnature。Iftheyfall,itiswhenthevoiceofconscienceislostinthewhirlwindofpassion,andcounselisdarkenedbythetumultuouspleadingsoftheheart。Theirsinisthattheywill,mostofthem,allowthemselvestobeputinpositionsfavourabletothedevelopmentofthesedisagreeableinfluences。Itisnotsafetolightcigarettesinapowderfactory。IfGeoffreyhaddonewhatheoughttohavedone,hewouldneverhavegonetoBryngelly,andtherewouldhavebeennostorytotell,ornomorethanthereusuallyis。
AtlengthMr。GrangerandhisguestreachedBryngelly;therewasnobodytomeetthem,fornobodyknewthattheywerecoming,sotheywalkeduptotheVicarage。ItwasstrangetoGeoffreyoncemoretopassbythelittlechurchthroughthosewell-remembered,wind-tornpinesandseethatlowlonghouse。Itseemedwonderfulthatallshouldstillbejustasitwas,thatthereshouldbenochangeatall,whenhehimselfhadseensomuch。TherewasBeatrice’shome;wherewasBeatrice?
Hepassedintothehouselikeamaninadream。Inanothermomenthewasinthelongparlourwherehehadspentsomanyhappyhours,andElizabethwasgreetinghim。Heshookhandswithher,andashedidso,noticedvaguelythatshetoowasutterlyunchanged。Herstraw-colouredhairwaspushedbackfromthetemplesinthesameway,themouthworethesamehardsmile,herlighteyesshonewiththesamecoldlook;sheevenworethesamebrowndress。Butsheappearedtobeverypleasedtoseehim,asindeedshewas,forthegamelookedwellforElizabeth。
Herfatherkissedherhurriedly,andbustledfromtheroomtolockuphisborrowedcash,leavingthemtogether。
SomehowGeoffrey’sconversationalpowersfailedhim。WherewasBeatrice?sheoughttobebackfromschool。Itwasholidaytimeindeed。Couldshebeaway?
Hemadeaneffort,andremarkedabsentlythatthingsseemedveryunchangedatBryngelly。
“YouarelookingforBeatrice。”saidElizabeth,answeringhisthoughtandnothiswords。“Shehasgoneoutwalking,butIthinkshewillbebacksoon。Excuseme,butImustgoandseeaboutyourroom。”
Geoffreyhungaboutalittle,thenhelithispipeandstrolleddowntothebeach,withavagueunexpressedideaofmeetingBeatrice。HedidnotmeetBeatrice,buthemetoldEdward,whoknewhimatonce。
“Lord,sir。”hesaid,“it’squeertoseeyouhereagain,speciallywhenIthinksashowIsawyoufirst,andyouadead’untoallpurposes,withyourmouthopen,andMissBeatricea-hangingontoyourhairfittopullyourscalpoff。YouneverwasneareroldDavythanyouwasthatnight,sir,norwon’tbe。Andnowyou’vebeensparedtobecomeaParliamentman,Ihears,andmuchgoodmayyoudothere——itwilltakeallyourtime,sir——andIthink,sir,thatIshouldliketodrinkyourhealth。”
Geoffreyputhishandinhispocketandgavetheoldmanasovereign。
Hecouldaffordtodosonow。
“DoesMissBeatricegooutcanoeingnow?”heaskedwhileEdwardmumbledhisastonishedthanks。
“Attimes,sir——thankingyoukindly;itain’tmanysuvringsascomesmyway——thoughIhatethesightonit,Ido。I’dliketostaveaholeinthebottomofthattherecrankyconcern;itain’tsafe,andthat’sthefact。There’llbeanotheraccentoutofitoneofthesefinedaysandnocomingtonexttime。But,Lordblessyou,it’sherwayofpleasuringherself。She’saqueerunisMissBeatrice,andshegetsqueererandqueerer,whatwiththeirbeingsotightscrewedupattheVicarage,notithesandthat,andonethingandanother。NotbutwhatI’mthinking,sir。”headdedinaportentouswhisper,“asthesquirehasgotsummuttodowithit。He’sacourtingofher,heis;he’sashardafterherasadogfishafterastrayherring,andwhyshecan’tjustsayyesandmarryhimI’msureIdon’tknow。”
“Perhapsshedoesn’tlikehim。”saidGeoffreycoldly。
“Maybe,sir,maybe;maidsallhavetheirfancies,inwhatsseverwalko’lifeithaspleasedGodtostick’em,butit’sawonderfulpity,itis。Heain’tnogreatshakes,heain’t,buthe’sasoundman——nogirlcan’twantasounder——livedquietallhisdaysyousee,sir,andwhat’smorehe’sgotthemoney,andmoney’stightupattheVicarage,sir。Galsmustgiveuptheirfanciessometimes,sir。Lord!abraceofbratsandshe’dforgetallabout’em。I’mseventyyearsoldandI’veseentheirways,sir,thoughinahumblecalling。Youshouldsayawordtoher,sir;she’dthankyoukindlyfiveyearsafter。You’ddoheragoodturn,sir,youwould,andnotabadunasthesayinggoes,andgiveitthelie——no,begyourpardon,thatistheotherwayround——she’sboundtodoyouthebadturnhavingsavedyourlife,thoughI
don’tseehowshecoulddothatunless,beggingyourpardon,shemadeyoufallinlovewithher,beingmarried,whichthoughstrangewouldn’tbewunnerfulseeingwhatsheisandseeinghowIhasbeeninlovewithhermyselfsinceshewasseven,oldmissusandall,whodiedeightyearsgoneandwellridoftherheumatics。”
BeatricewasoneofthefewsubjectsthatcouldunlockoldEdward’sbreast,andGeoffreyretiredbeforehisconfusingbutsuggestiveeloquence。Hurriedlybiddingtheoldmangood-nighthereturnedtothehouse,andleaningonthegatewatchedthetwilightdyingonthebosomofthewest。
Suddenly,abunchofwildrosesinhergirdle,Beatriceemergedfromthegatheringgloomandstoodbeforehimfacetoface。
CHAPTERXXI
THETHIRDAPPEAL
Facetofacetheystood,whileatthevisionofhersweetnesshisheartgrewstill。Facetoface,andthefaintlightfelluponhertenderlovelinessanddiedinherdeepeyes,andthefaintbreezefragrantwiththebreathofpinesgentlystirredherhair。Oh,itwasworthlivingtoseeherthus!
“Ibegyourpardon。”shesaidinapuzzledtone,steppingforwardtopassthegate。
“/Beatrice!/“
Shegavealittlecry,andclutchedtherailing,elseshewouldhavefallen。Onemomentshestayedso,lookinguptowardshisfacethatwashidinthedeepeningshadow——lookingwithwildeyesofhopeandfearandlove。
“Isityou。”shesaidatlength,“oranotherdream?”
“ItisI,Beatrice!“heanswered,amazed。
Sherecoveredherselfwithaneffort。
“Thenwhydidyoufrightenmeso?”sheasked。“Itwasunkind——oh,I
didnotmeantosayanythingcross。WhatdidIsay?Iforget。Iamsogladthatyouhavecome!“andsheputherhandtoherforeheadandlookedathimagainasonemightgazeataghostfromthegrave。
“Didyounotexpectme?”Geoffreyasked。
“Expectyou?no。NomorethanIexpected——“andshestoppedsuddenly。
“Itisveryodd。”hesaid;“Ithoughtyouknewthatyourfatherwasgoingtoaskmedown。IreturnedfromLondonwithhim。”
“FromLondon。”shemurmured。“Ididnotknow;Elizabethdidnottellmeanythingaboutit。Isupposethatsheforgot。”
“HereIamatanyrate,andhowareyou?”
“Oh,wellnow,quitewell。There,Iamallrightagain。Itisverywrongtofrightenpeopleinthatway,Mr。Bingham。”sheaddedinherusualvoice。“LetmepassthroughthegateandIwillshakehandswithyou——if。”sheadded,inatoneofgentlemockery,“onemayshakehandswithsogreataman。ButItoldyouhowitwouldbe,didInot,justbeforeweweredrownedtogether,youknow?HowisEffie?”
“Effieflourishes。”heanswered。“Doyouknow,youdonotlookverygrand。Yourfathertoldmethatyouhadacoldinthewinter。”andGeoffreyshiveredashethoughtofthecause。
“Oh,thankyou,Ihavenothingtocomplainof。Iamstrongandwell。
Howlongdoyoustayhere?”
“Notlong。PerhapstillTuesdaymorning,perhapstillMonday。”
Beatricesighed。Happinessisshort。Shehadnotbroughthimhere,shewouldnothaveliftedafingertobringhimhere,butsincehehadcomeshewishedthathewasgoingtostaylonger。
“Itissuppertime。”shesaid;“letusgoin。”
Sotheywentinandatetheirsupper。Itwasahappymeal。Mr。Grangerwasinalmostboisterousspirits。Itiswonderfulwhatadifferencethepossessionofthattwohundredpoundsmadeinhisdemeanour;heseemedanotherman。Itwastruethatahundredofitmustgoinpayingdebts,butahundredwouldbeleft,whichmeantatleastayear’srespiteforhim。Elizabeth,too,relaxedherhabitualgrimness;thetwohundredpoundshaditsinfluenceonheralso,andtherewereothergenialinfluencesatworkinherdarksecretheart。Beatriceknewnothingofthemoneyandsatsomewhatsilent,butshetoowashappywiththewildunrealhappinessthatsometimesvisitsusindreams。
AsforGeoffrey,ifLadyHonoriacouldhaveseenhimshewouldhavestaredinastonishment。Oflatehehadbeenaverysilentman,manypeopleindeedhadfoundhimadullcompanion。ButundertheinfluenceofBeatrice’spresencehetalkedandtalkedbrilliantly。Perhapshewasunconsciouslystrivingtoshowathisverybestbeforeher,asamannaturallydoesinthepresenceofawomanwhomheloves。Sobrilliantlydidhetalkthatatlasttheyallsatstillandlistenedtohim,andtheymighthavebeenworseemployed。
Atlengthsupperwasdone,andElizabethretiredtoherroom。
Presently,too,Mr。Grangerwascalledouttochristenasickbabyandwentgrumbling,andtheywereleftalone。Theysatinthewindow-placeandlookedoutatthequietnight。
“Tellmeaboutyourself。”saidBeatrice。
Sohetoldher。Henarratedallthestepsbywhichhehadreachedhispresentposition,andshowedherhowfromithemightrisetothetopmostheightsofall。Shedidnotlookathim,anddidnotanswerhim,butoncewhenhepaused,thinkingthathehadtalkedenoughabouthimself,shesaid,“Goon;tellmesomemore。”
Atlasthehadtoldherall。
“Yes。”shesaid,“youhavethepowerandtheopportunity,andyouwillonedaybeamongtheforemostmenofyourgeneration。”
“Idoubtit。”hesaidwithasigh。“Iamnotambitious。Ionlyworkforthesakeofwork,notforwhatitwillbring。OnedayIdaresaythatIshallwearyofitallandleaveit。ButwhileIdowork,Iliketobeamongthefirstinmydegree。”
“Oh,no。”sheanswered,“youmustnotgiveitup;youmustgoonandon。Promiseme。”shecontinued,lookingathimforthefirsttime——
“promisemethatwhileyouhavehealthandstrengthyouwillperseveretillyoustandaloneandquitepre-eminent。Thenyoucangiveitup。”
“WhyshouldIpromiseyouthis,Beatrice?”
“BecauseIaskitofyou。OnceIsavedyourlife,Mr。Bingham,anditgivesmesomelittlerighttodirectitscourse。IwishthatthemanwhomIsavedtotheworldshouldbeamongthefirstmenintheworld,notinwealth,whichisanaccident,butinintellectandforce。
PromisemethisandIshallbehappy。”
“Ipromiseyou。”hesaid,“IpromisethatIwilltrytorisebecauseyouaskit,notbecausetheprospectattractsme;butashespokehisheartwaswrung。Itwasbittertohearherspeakthusofafutureinwhichshewouldhavenoshare,which,asherwordsimplied,wouldbeathingutterlyapartfromher,asmuchapartasthoughsheweredead。
“Yes。”hesaidagain,“yougavememylife,anditmakesmeveryunhappytothinkthatIcangiveyounothinginreturn。Oh,Beatrice,IwilltellyouwhatIhavenevertoldtoanyone。Iamlonelyandwretched。Withtheexceptionofyourself,Idonotthinkthatthereisanybodywhoreallycaresfor——Imeanwhoreallysympathiseswithmeintheworld。Idaresaythatitismyownfaultanditsoundsahumiliatingthingtosay,and,inafashion,aselfishthing。Inevershouldhavesaidittoanylivingsoulbutyou。Whatistheuseofbeinggreatwhenthereisnobodytoworkfor?Thingsmighthavebeendifferent,buttheworldisahardplace。Ifyou——ifyou——“
Atthismomenthishandtouchedhers;itwasaccidental,butinthetendernessofhisheartheyieldedtothetemptationandtookit。Thentherewasamoment’spause,andverygentlyshedrewherhandawayandthrustitinherbosom。
“Youhaveyourwifetoshareyourfortune。”shesaid;“youhaveEffietoinheritit,andyoucanleaveyournametoyourcountry。”
Thencameaheavypause。
“Andyou。”hesaid,breakingit,“whatfutureisthereforyou?”
Shelaughedsoftly。“Womenhavenofutureandtheyasknone。AtleastIdonotnow,thoughonceIdid。Itisenoughforthemiftheycaneversolittlehelpthelivesofothers。Thatistheirhappiness,andtheirrewardis——rest。”
JustthenMr。Grangercamebackfromhischristening,andBeatriceroseandwenttobed。
“Looksalittlepale,doesn’tshe,Mr。Bingham?”saidherfather。“I
thinkshemustbetroubledinhermind。Thefactis——well,thereisnoreasonwhyIshouldnottellyou;shethinkssomuchofyou,andyoumightsayawordtobrightenherup——well,it’saboutMr。Davies。I
fancy,youknow,thatshelikeshimandisvexedbecausehedoesnotcomeforward。Well,yousee——ofcourseImaybemistaken,butIhavesometimesthoughtthathemay。Ihaveseenhimlookasifhewasthinkingofit,thoughofcourseitismorethanBeatricehasgotanyrighttoexpect。She’sonlygotherselfandhergoodlookstogivehim,andhe’sarichman。Thinkofit,Mr。Bingham。”andtheoldgentlemanturneduphiseyespiously,“justthinkwhatathingitwouldbeforher,andindeedforallofus,ifitshouldpleaseGodtosendachancelikethatinherway;shewouldberichforlife,andsuchaposition!Butitispossible;oneneverknows;hemighttakeafancytoher。Atanyrate,Mr。Bingham,Ithinkyoucouldcheerherupalittle;thereisnoneedforhertogiveuphopeyet。”
Geoffreyburstintoashortgrimlaugh。TheideaofBeatricelanguishingforOwenDavies,indeedtheironyofthewholeposition,wastoomuchforhissenseofhumour。
“Yes。”hesaid,“Idaresaythatitmightbeagoodmatchforher,butIdonotknowhowshewouldgetonwithMr。Davies。”
“Geton!why,wellenough,ofcourse。Womenaresoft,andcansqueezeintomostholes,especiallyiftheyarewelllined。Besides,hemaybeabitheavy,butIthinksheispiningforhim,andit’sapitythatsheshouldwasteherlifelikethat。What,areyougoingtobed?Well,good-night——good-night。”
Geoffreydidgotobed,butnottosleep。Foralongwhilehelayawake,thinking。Hethoughtofthelastnightwhichhehadspentinthislittleroom,ofitsstrangeexperiences,ofallthathadhappenedsince,andofthemeetingofto-day。Couldhe,afterthatmeeting,anylongerdoubtwhatwerethefeelingswithwhichBeatriceregardedhim?
Itwasdifficulttoso,andyettherewasstillroomforerror。ThenhethoughtofwhatoldEdwardhadsaidtohim,andofwhatMr。GrangerhadsaidwithreferencetoBeatriceandOwenDavies。Theviewsofbothwerecrudelyandevenvulgarlyexpressed,buttheycoincided,and,whatwasmore,therewastruthinthem,andheknewit。TheideaofBeatricemarryingMr。Davies,toputitmildly,wasrepulsivetohim;
buthadheanyclaimtostandbetweenherandsodesirableasettlementinlife?Clearly,hehadnot,hisconsciencetoldhimso。
Coulditberight,moreover,thatthiskindoftiewhichexistedbetweenthemshouldbeknittedmoreclosely?Whatwoulditmean?
Trouble,andnothingbuttrouble,moreespeciallytoBeatrice,whowouldfretherdaysawaytonoend。Hehaddonewrongincominghereatall,hehaddonewrongintakingherhand。HewouldmaketheonlyreparationinhispowerasthoughinsuchacaseasthatofBeatricereparationwerenowpossible!Hewouldeffacehimselffromherlifeandseehernomore。Thenshemightlearntoforgethim,or,attheworst,torememberhimwithbutavagueregret。Yes,costwhatitmight,hewouldforcehimselftodoitbeforeanyactualmischiefensued。Theonlyquestionwas,shouldhenotgofurther?ShouldhenottellherthatshewoulddowelltomarryMr。Davies?
Ponderingoverthismostpainfulquestion,atlasthewenttosleep。
WhenmeninGeoffrey’sunhappypositionturnpenitentandseetheerroroftheirways,theprudentresolvesthatensueareapttoovershootthemarkandtopartakeofanaggressivenature。Notsatisfiedwithleavingthingsalone,theymustneedshastentoproclaimtheirnew-foundvirtuetothepartneroftheirfault,andadvertisetheirinfalliblespecifictobetakenbythepartnerforrestoringthe/statusquoante/。Sometimesasaconsequenceofthispiouszealtheyfindthemselvesmisunderstood,orevensucceedinprecipitatingthecatastrophewhichtheylaudablydesiretoprevent。
ThemorrowwasWhit-Sunday,andadaythatGeoffreyhadoccasiontorememberfortherestofhislife。Theyallmetatbreakfastandshortlyafterwardswenttochurch,theservicebeingathalf-pastten。
Bywayofputtingintoeffectthegoodresolutionswithwhichhewassobusypavinganinfernoofhisown,GeoffreydidnotsitbyBeatrice,buttookaseatattheendofthelittlechurch,closetothedoor,andtriedtoconsolehimselfbylookingather。
Itwasacurioussullen-naturedday,andalthoughtherewasnotverymuchsuntheairwasashotasthoughtheywereinmidsummer。Hadtheybeeninavolcanicregion,Geoffreywouldhavethoughtthatsuchweatherprecededashockofearthquake。AsitwasheknewthattheEnglishclimatewassimplyindulgingitselfattheexpenseofthepopulation。Butasuptothepresent,theseasonhadbeencold,thisknowledgedidnotconsolehim。Indeedhefeltsochokedinthestuffylittlechurchthatjustbeforethesermonwhichhehappenedtobeawarewas/not/writtenbyBeatricehetookanopportunitytoslipoutunobserved。Notknowingwheretogo,hestrolleddowntothebeach,onwhichtherewasnobodytobeseen,for,ashasbeenobserved,BryngellysleptonSundays。Presently,however,amanapproachedwalkingrapidly,andtoallappearanceaimlessly,inwhomherecognisedOwenDavies。Hewastalkingtohimselfwhilehewalked,andswinginghisarms。Geoffreysteppedasidetolethimpass,andashedidsowassurprisedandevenshockedtoseethechangeintheman。
Hisplumphealthy-lookingfacehadgrownthin,andworeahalfsullen,halfpitifulexpression;thereweredarkcirclesroundhisblueeyes,oncesoplacid,andhishairwouldhavebeenthebetterforcutting。
Geoffreywonderedifhehadhadanillness。AtthatmomentOwenchancedtolookroundandsawhim。
“Howdoyoudo,Mr。Bingham?”hesaid。“Iheardthatyouwerehere。
Theytoldmeatthestationlastnight。Youseethisisasmallplaceandonelikestoknowwhocomesandgoes。”headdedasthoughinexcuse。
HewalkedonandGeoffreywalkedwithhim。
“Youdonotlookwell,Mr。Davies。”hesaid。“Haveyoubeenlaidup?”
“No,no。”heanswered,“Iamquiteright;itisonlymymindthatisill。”
“Indeed。”saidGeoffrey,thinkingthathecertainlydidlookstrange。
“Perhapsyoulivetoomuchaloneanditdepressesyou。”
“Yes,Ilivealone,becauseIcan’thelpmyself。Whatisamantodo,Mr。Bingham,whenthewomanheloveswillnotmarryhim,won’tlookathim,treatshimlikedirt?”
“Marrysomebodyelse。”suggestedGeoffrey。
“Oh,itiseasyforyoutosaythat——youhaveneverlovedanybody,andyoudon’tunderstand。Icannotmarryanybodyelse,Iwantheronly。”
“Her?Whom?”
“Who!why,Beatrice——whomelsecouldamanwanttomarry,ifoncehehadseenher。Butshewillnothaveme;shehatesme。”
“Really。”saidGeoffrey。
“Yes,really,anddoyouknowwhy?ShallItellyouwhy?Iwilltellyou。”andhegraspedhimbythearmandwhisperedhoarselyinhisear:
“Becausesheloves/you/,Mr。Bingham。”
“Itellyouwhatitis,Mr。Davies。”saidGeoffreyshakinghisarmfree,“Iamnotgoingtostandthiskindofthing。Youmustbeoffyourhead。”
“Don’tbeangrywithme。”heanswered。“Itistrue。IhavewatchedherandIknowthatitistrue。Whydoesshewritetoyoueveryweek,whydoesshealwaysstartandlistenwhenanybodymentionsyourname?Oh,Mr。Bingham。”Owenwentonpiteously,“bemerciful——youhaveyourwifeandlotsofwomentomakelovetoifyouwish——leavemeBeatrice。Ifyoudon’tIthinkthatIshallgocrazed。Ihavealwayslovedher,eversinceshewasachild,andnowmylovetravelsfasterandgrowsstrongereveryday,andcarriesmeawaywithitlikearockrollingdownahill。YoucanonlybringBeatricetoshame,butIcangivehereverything,asmuchmoneyasshewants,allthatshewants,andIwillmakeheragoodhusband;Iwillneverleaveherside。”
“Ihavenodoubtthatwouldbedelightfulforher。”answeredGeoffrey;
“butdoesitnotstrikeyouthatallthisisjustalittleundignified?Theseremarks,interestingastheyare,shouldbemadetoMissGranger,nottome,Mr。Davies。”
“Iknow。”hesaid,“butIdon’tcare;itismyonlychance,andwhatdoImindaboutbeingundignified?Oh,Mr。Bingham,Ihaveneverlovedanyotherwoman,Ihavebeenlonelyallmydays。Donotstandinmypathnow。IfyouonlyknewwhatIhavesuffered,howIhaveprayedGodnightafternighttogivemeBeatrice,youwouldhelpme。Saythatyouwillhelpme!Youareoneofthosemenwhocandoanything;shewilllistentoyou。Ifyoutellhertomarrymeshewilldoso,andIshallblessyoumywholelife。”
Geoffreylookeduponthisabjectsuppliantwiththemostunmitigatedscorn。Thereisalwayssomethingcontemptibleinthesightofonemanpleadingtoanotherforassistanceinhisloveaffairs——thatisabusinesswhichheshoulddoforhimself。Howmuchgreater,then,isthehumiliationinvolvedwhentheamorouspersonaskstheaidofonewhomhebelievestobehisrival——hissuccessfulrival——inthelady’saffection?
“Doyouknow,Mr。Davies。”Geoffreysaid,“IthinkthatIhavehadenoughofthis。IamnotinapositiontoforceMissGrangertoacceptadvanceswhichappeartobeunwelcomeaccordingtoyouraccount。ButifIgetanopportunityIwilldothis:Iwilltellherwhatyousay。
Youreallymustmanagetherestforyourself。Goodmorningtoyou,Mr。
Davies。”
HeturnedsharplyandwentwhileOwenwatchedhimgo。
“Idon’tbelievehim。”hegroanedtohimself。“Hewilltrytomakeherhislover。Oh,Godhelpme——Icannotbeartothinkofit。Butifhedoes,andIfindhimout,lethimbecareful。Iwillruinhim,yes,I
willruinhim!IhavethemoneyandIcandoit。Ah,hethinksmeafool,theyallthinkmeafool,butIhaven’tbeenquietalltheseyearsfornothing。Icanmakeanoiseifnecessary。Andifheisavillain,Godwillhelpmetodestroyhim。IhaveprayedtoGod,andGodwillhelpme。”
ThenhewentbacktotheCastle。OwenDavieswasatypeoftheclassofreligiousmenwhobelievethattheycanenlisttheAlmightyonthesideoftheirdesires,providedonlythatthosedesiresreceivethesanctionofhumanlaworcustom。
Thuswithintwenty-fourhoursGeoffreyreceivednolessthanthreeappealstohelpthewomanwhomhelovedtothearmsofadistastefulhusband。Nowonderthenthathegrewalmostsuperstitiousaboutthematter。
CHAPTERXXII
ANIGHTOFSTORM
ThatafternoonthewholeVicaragepartywalkeduptothefarmtoinspectanotherlitterofyoungpigs。ItstruckGeoffrey,rememberingformereditions,thatthereproductivepowersofMr。Granger’soldsowweresomethinglittleshortofmarvellous,andhedreamilyworkedoutacalculationofhowlongitwouldtakeherandherprogenytoproduceapigtoeverysquareyardoftheareaofpluckylittleWales。Itseemedthatthethingcouldbedoneinsixyears,whichwasabsurd,sohegaveupcalculating。
HehadnowordsalonewithBeatricethatafternoon。Indeed,acertaincoldnessseemedtohavesprungupbetweenthem。Withthealmostsupernaturalquicknessofalovingwoman’sintuition,shehaddivinedthatsomethingwaspassinginhismind,inimicaltohermostvitalinterests,sosheshunnedhiscompany,andreceivedhisconventionaladvanceswithapolitenesswhichwasascoldasitwascrushing。ThisdidnotpleaseGeoffrey;itisonethinginherowninterests,ofcoursetomakeupyourmindheroicallytoabandonaladywhomyoudonotwishtocompromise,andquiteanothertobesnubbedbythatladybeforethemomentoffinalseparation。Thoughheneverputtheideaintowordsorevendefineditinhismind——forGeoffreywasfartooanxiousandunhappytobeflippant,atanyrateinthought——hewouldathearthavewishedhertoremainthesame,indeedtowaxevertenderer,tillthefataltimeofpartingarrived,andeventoshowappreciationofhisvirtuousconduct。
ButtotheutterdestructionofmostsuchhandsasGeoffreyheld,lovingwomenneverwillplayaccordingtothebook。Theirconductimperilseverything,foritisobviousthatittakestwotobringanaffairofthisnaturetoadignifiedconclusion,evenwhenthestakesarehighest,andthematterisoneoflifeanddeath。Beatriceafterallwasverymuchofawoman,andshedidnotbehavemuchbetterthananyotherwomanwouldhavedone。Shewasangryandsuspicious,andsheshowedit,withtheresultthatGeoffreygrewangryalso。Itwascruelofher,hethought,consideringallthings。Heforgotthatshecouldknownothingofwhatwasinhismind,howevermuchshemightguess;
alsoasyethedidnotknowtheboundlessdepthandmightofherpassionforhim,andallthatitmeanttoher。Hadherealisedthishewouldhaveactedverydifferently。
Theycamehomeandtooktea,thenMr。GrangerandElizabethmadereadytogotoeveningservice。ToGeoffrey’sdismayBeatricedidthesame。
Hehadlookedforwardtoaquietwalkwithher——reallythiswasnottobeborne。Fortunately,orratherunfortunately,shewasreadythefirst,andhegotawordwithher。
“Ididnotknowthatyouweregoingtochurch。”hesaid;“Ithoughtthatwemighthavehadawalktogether。VerylikelyIshallhavetogoawayearlyto-morrowmorning。”
“Indeed。”answeredBeatricecoldly。“Butofcourseyouhaveyourworktoattendto。ItoldElizabeththatIwascomingtochurch,andImustgo;itistoosultrytowalk;therewillbeastormsoon。”
AtthismomentElizabethcamein。
“Well,Beatrice。”shesaid,“areyoucomingtochurch?Fatherhasgoneon。”
Beatricepretendednottohear,andreflectedamoment。Hewouldgoawayandshewouldseehimnomore。Couldsheletslipthislasthour?
Oh,shecouldnotdoit!
Inthatmomentofreflectionherfatewassealed。
“No。”sheansweredslowly,“Idon’tthinkthatIamcoming;itistoosultrytogotochurch。IdaresaythatMr。Binghamwillaccompanyyou。”
Geoffreyhastilydisclaimedanysuchintention,andElizabethstartedalone。“Ah!“shesaidtoherself,“Ithoughtthatyouwouldnotcome,mydear。”
“Well。”saidGeoffrey,whenshehadwellgone,“shallwegoout?”
“Ithinkitispleasanterhere。”answeredBeatrice。
“Oh,Beatrice,don’tbesounkind。”hesaidfeebly。
“Asyoulike。”shereplied。“Thereisafinesunset——butIthinkthatweshallhaveastorm。”
Theywentout,andturnedupthelonelybeach。Theplacewasutterlydeserted,andtheywalkedalittlewayapart,almostwithoutspeaking。
Thesunsetwasmagnificent;greatflakesofgoldencloudweredrivencontinuallyfromahomeofsplendourinthewesttowardsthecoldlinedhorizonoftheland。Theseawasstillquiet,butitmoanedlikeathinginpain。Thestormwasgatheringfast。
“Whatalovelysunset。”saidGeoffreyatlength。
“Itisafatalsortofloveliness。”sheanswered;“itwillbeabadnight,andawetmorrow。Thewindisrising;shallweturn?”
“No,Beatrice,nevermindthewind。Iwanttospeaktoyou,ifyouwillallowmetodoso。”
“Yes。”saidBeatrice,“whatabout,Mr。Bingham。”
Tomakegoodresolutionsinamatterofthissortiscomparativelyeasy,butthecarryingofthemoutpresentssomedifficulties。
Geoffrey,conscience-strickenintopriggishness,wishedtotellherthatshewoulddowelltomarryOwenDavies,andfoundthematterhard。MeanwhileBeatricepreservedsilence。
“Thefactis。”hesaidatlength,“Imostsincerelyhopeyouwillforgiveme,butIhavebeenthinkingagreatdealaboutyouandyourfuturewelfare。”
“Thatisverykindofyou。”saidBeatrice,withanominoushumility。
Thiswasdisconcerting,butGeoffreywasdetermined,andhewentoninasomewhatflippanttonebornofthemostintensenervousnessandhatredofhistask。Neverhadhelovedhersowellasnowinthismomentwhenhewasabouttocounselhertomarryanotherman。Andyetheperseveredinhisfolly。For,assooftenhappens,theshrewdinsightandknowledgeoftheworldwhichdistinguishedGeoffreyasalawyer,whendealingwiththeaffairsofothers,quitedesertedhiminthiscrisisofhisownlifeandthatofthewomanwhoworshippedhim。
“SinceIhavebeenhere。”hesaid,“Ihavehadmadetomenolessthanthreeappealsonyourbehalfandbyseparatepeople——byyourfather,whofanciesthatyouarepiningforOwenDavies;byOwenDavies,whoiscertainlypiningforyou;andbyoldEdward,interveningasakindofdomestic/amicuscuri?/。”
“Indeed。”saidBeatrice,inavoiceofice。
“Allthesethreeurgedthesamething——thedesirabilityofyourmarryingOwenDavies。”
Beatrice’sfacegrewquitepale,herlipstwitchedandhergreyeyesflashedangrily。
“Really。”shesaid,“andhave/you/anyadvicetogiveonthesubject,Mr。Bingham?”
“Yes,Beatrice,Ihave。Ihavethoughtitover,andIthinkthat——
forgivemeagain——thatifyoucanbringyourselftoit,perhapsyouhadbettermarryhim。Heisnotsuchabadsortofman,andheiswelloff。”
Theyhadbeenwalkingrapidly,andnowtheywerereachingthespotknownasthe“Amphitheatre。”thatsamespotwhereOwenDavieshadproposedtoBeatricesomesevenmonthsbefore。
Beatricepassedroundtheprojectingedgeofrock,andwalkedsomewaytowardstheflatslabofstoneinthecentrebeforesheanswered。
Whileshedidsoagreatandbitterangerfilledherheart。Shesaw,orthoughtshesaw,itall。Geoffreywishedtoberidofher。Hehaddiscernedanelementofdangerintheirintimacy,andwasanxioustomakethatintimacyimpossiblebypushingherintoahatefulmarriage。
Suddenlysheturnedandfacedhim——turnedlikeathingatbay。Thelastredraysofthesunsetstruckuponherlovelyfacemademorelovelystillbyitsstampofhaughtyanger:theylayuponherheavingbreast。Fullintheeyesshelookedhimwiththosewideangryeyesofhers——neverbeforehadheseenhersoimperialamien。Herdignityandthepowerofherpresenceliterallyawedhim,forattimesBeatrice’sbeautywasofthatroyalstampwhichwhenithidesaheart,isacompellingforce,conqueringandborntoconquer。
“Doesitnotstrikeyou,Mr。Bingham。”shesaidquietly,“thatyouaretakingaverygreatliberty?Doesitnotstrikeyouthatnomanwhoisnotarelationhasanyrighttospeaktoawomanasyouhavespokentome?——that,inshort,youhavebeenguiltyofwhatinmostpeoplewouldbeanimpertinence?WhatrighthaveyoutodictatetomeastowhomI
shouldorshouldnotmarry?Surelyofallthingsintheworldthatismyownaffair。”
Geoffreycolouredtotheeyes。Aswouldhavebeenthecasewithmostmenofhisclass,hefeltheraccusationofhavingtakenaliberty,ofhavingpresumeduponanintimacy,morekeenlythananywhichshecouldhavebroughtagainsthim。
“Forgiveme。”hesaidhumbly。“IcanonlyassureyouthatIhadnosuchintention。Ionlyspoke——ill-judgedly,Ifear——because——becauseI
feltdriventoit。”
Beatricetooknonoticeofhiswords,butwentoninthesamecoldvoice。
“WhatrighthaveyoutospeakofmyaffairswithMr。Davies,withanoldboatman,orevenwithmyfather?HadIwishedyoutodosoI
shouldhaveaskedyou。Bywhatauthoritydoyouconstituteyourselfanintermediaryforthepurposeofbringingaboutamarriagewhichyouaresogoodastoconsiderwouldbetomypecuniaryinterest?Doyounotknowthatsuchamatterisonewhichthewomanconcerned,thewomanwhosehappinessandself-respectareatstake,alonecanjudgeof?Ihavenothingmoretosayexceptthis。Isaidjustnowthatyouhadbeenguiltyofwhatwouldinmostpeoplebeanimpertinence。Well,Iwilladdsomething。Inthiscase,Mr。Bingham,therearecircumstanceswhichmakeit——acruelinsult!“
Shestoppedspeaking,thensuddenly,withouttheslightestwarning,burstintopassionateweeping。Asshedidso,thefirstrushofthestormpassedoverthem,winnowingtheairaswithathousandeagles’
wings,andwaslostonthemoaningdepthsbeyond。
Thelightwentoutofthesky。NowGeoffreycouldonlyseethefaintoutlinesofherweepingface。Onemomenthehesitatedandoneonly;
thenNatureprevailedagainsthim,forthenextshewasinhisarms。
Beatricescarcelyresistedhim。Herenergiesseemedtofailher,orperhapsshehadspenttheminherbitterwords。Herheadfelluponhisshoulder,andthereshesobbedherfill。Presentlyshelifteditandtheirlipsmetinafirstlongkiss。Itwasfinished;thiswastheendofit——andthusdidGeoffreyprosperOwenDavies’ssuit。
“Oh,youarecruel,cruel!“hewhisperedinherear。“YoumusthaveknownIlovedyou,Beatrice,thatIspokeagainstmyselfbecauseI
thoughtittobemyduty。Youmusthaveknownthat,tomysinandsorrow,Ihavealwayslovedyou,thatyouhaveneverbeenanhourfrommymind,thatIhavelongedtoseeyourfacelikeasickmanforthelight。Tellme,didyounotknowit,Beatrice?”
“HowshouldIknow?”sheansweredverysoftly;“Icouldonlyguess,andifindeedyoulovemehowcouldyouwishmetomarryanotherman?
Ithoughtthatyouhadlearnedmyweaknessandtookthiswaytoreproachme。Oh,Geoffrey,whathavewedone?Whatistherebetweenyouandme——exceptourlove?”
“Itwouldhavebeenbetterifwehadbeendrownedtogetheratthefirst。”hesaidheavily。
“No,no。”sheanswered,“forthenwenevershouldhavelovedoneanother。Betterfirsttolove,andthentodie!“
“Donotspeakso。”hesaid;“letussithereandbehappyforalittlewhileto-night,andleavetroubletillto-morrow。”
And,whereonabygonedayBeatricehadtarriedwithanotherwooer,sidebysidetheysatuponthegreatstoneandtalkedsuchtalkasloversuse。
Abovethemmoanedtherisinggale,thoughshelteredastheywerebycliffsitsbreathscarcelystirredtheirhair。Infrontofthemthelongwavesboomeduponthebeach,whilefarouttoseathecrescentmoon,drapedinangrylight,seemedtoridethewaterslikeaboat。
Andweretheyalonewiththeirgreatbliss,ordidtheyonlydream?
Nay,theywerealonewithloveandlovers’joys,andallthetruthwastold,andalltheirdoubtsweredone。Nowtherewasanendofhopesandfears;nowreasonfellandLoveusurpedhisthrone,andatthatroyalcomingHeaventhrewwidehergates。Oh,Sweetestandmostdear!
Oh,Dearestandmostsweet!Oh,tohavelivedtofindthishappyhour——oh,inthishourtodie!
Seeheavinessisbehindus,seenowweareone。Blow,youwinds,blowoutyourstormyheart;weknowthesecretofyourstrength,yourushtoyourdesire。Fall,deepwatersofthesea,fallinthunderatthefeetofearth;wehearthemusicofyourpleading。
Earth,andSeas,andWinds,singyourgreatchantoflove!HeavenandSpaceandTime,echobackthemelody!ForLifehascalledtoustheanswerofhisriddle!Hearttoheartwesit,andlipstolips,andwearemorewisethanSolomon,andricherthanbarbariankings,forHappinessisours。
Tothisendwereweborn,Dearestandmostsweet,andfromalltimepredestinate!Tothisend,Sweetestandmostdear,doweliveanddie,indeathtofindcompleterunity。Forhereisthatsecretoftheworldwhichwisemensearchandcannotfind,andheretooisthegateofHeaven。
Lookintomyeyes,andletmegazeonyours,andlistenhowthesethingsshallbe。Theworldisbutamockery,andashadowisourflesh,forwhereoncetheywerethereshallbenaught。OnlyLoveisreal;Loveshallenduretillallthesunsaredead,andyetbeyoung。
Kissme,thouConqueror,forDestinyisovercome,Sorrowisgoneby;
andtheflamethatwehavehalloweduponthisearthlyaltarshallstillburnbrightly,andyetmorebright,whenyonderstarshavelosttheirfire。
Butalas!wordscannotgiveafittingformtosuchasongasthis。Letmusictry!Butmusicalsofoldsherwings。Forinsosupremeanhour“Aboltisshotbacksomewhereinourbreast。”
andthroughthatopeneddoorcomesightsandsoundssuchascannotbewritten。
Theytellusitismadness,thatthisunearthlygloryisbutthefrenzyofapassiongrossinitsveryessence。Letthosethinkitwhowill,buttodreamersletthemleavetheirdreams。Whythen,atsuchatime,dovisionscometochildrenoftheworldlikeBeatriceandGeoffrey?Whydotheirdoubtsvanish,andwhatisthatbreathfromheavenwhichtheyseemtofeelupontheirbrow?Theintoxicationofearthlylovebornofthemeetingofyouthandbeauty。Sobeit!Slave,bringmoresuchwineandletusdrink——toImmortalityandtothosedeareyesthatmirrorforthaspirit’sface!
Suchlovesindeedarefew。Fortheymustberealanddeep,andnaturesthusshapedarerare,nordotheyoftencrosseachother’slineoflife。Yes,therearefewwhocanbebornesohigh,andnonecanbreathethatetherlong。SoonthewingswhichLovelenttheminhishourofrevelationwillshrinkandvanish,andtheborrowerswillfallbacktothelevelofthisworld,happyiftheyescapeuncrushed。
Perchanceevenintheirlife-days,theymayfindthesespiritwingsagain,overshadowingthealtaroftheirvowsinthehourofearthlymarriage,ifbysomehappyfate,marriageshouldbewithintheirreach,orliketheholypinionsofthegoddessNout,foldedaboutacoffin,inthetimeofearthlydeath。Butscantaretheoccasions,andfewtherearewhoknowthem。
ThussoaredBeatriceandGeoffreywhilethewildnightbeataroundthem,makingafitaccompanimenttotheirstormyloves。Andthustheytoofellfromheaventoearth。
“Wemustbegoing,Geoffrey;itgrowslate。”saidBeatrice。“Oh,Geoffrey,Geoffrey,whathavewedone?Whatcanbetheendofallthis?Itwillbringtroubleonyou,Iknowthatitmust。Theoldsayingwillcometrue。Isavedyourlife,andIshallbringruinonyou!“
ItischaracteristicofBeatricethatalreadyshewasthinkingoftheconsequencestoGeoffrey,notofthosetoherself。
“Beatrice。”saidGeoffrey,“weareinadesperateposition。Doyouwishtofaceitandcomeawaywithme,farawaytotheothersideoftheworld?”
“No,no。”sheansweredvehemently,“itwouldbeyourruintoabandonthecareerthatisbeforeyou。Whatpartoftheworldcouldyougotowhereyouwouldnotbeknown?Besidesthereisyourwifetothinkof。
Ah,God,yourwife——whatwouldshesayofme?Youbelongtoher,youhavenorighttodeserther。AndthereisEffietoo。No,Geoffrey,no,Ihavebeenwickedenoughtolearntoloveyou——oh,asyouwereneverlovedbefore,ifitiswickedtodowhatonecannothelp——butIamnotbadenoughforthis。Walkquicker,Geoffrey;weshallbelate,andtheywillsuspectsomething。”
PoorBeatrice,thepangsofconsciencewerefindingherout!
“Weareinadreadfulposition。”hesaidagain。“Oh,dearest,Ihavebeentoblame。Ishouldneverhavecomebackhere。Itismyfault;andthoughIneverthoughtofthis,Ididmybesttopleaseyou。”
“AndIthankyouforit。”sheanswered。“Donotdeceiveyourself,Geoffrey。Whateverhappens,promisemeneverforonemomenttobelievethatIreproachedorblamedyou。WhyshouldIblameyoubecauseyouwonmyheart?Letmesoonerblametheseaonwhichwefloated,thebeachwherewewalked,thehouseinwhichwelived,andtheDestinythatbroughtustogether。Iamproudandgladtoloveyou,dear,butI
amnotsoselfishastowishtoruinyou:Geoffrey——Ihadratherdie。”
“Don’ttalkso。”hesaid,“Icannotbearit。Whatarewetodo?AmI
togoawayandseeyounomore?Howcanweliveso,Beatrice?”
“Yes,Geoffrey。”sheansweredheavily,takinghimbythehandandgazingupintohisface,“youaretogoawayandseemenomore,notforyearsandyears。Thisiswhatwehavebroughtuponourselves,itisthepricethatwemustpayforthishourwhichhasgone。Youaretogoawayto-morrow,thatwemaybeputoutoftemptation,andyoumustcomebacknomore。SometimesIshallwritetoyou,andsometimesperhapsyouwillwritetome,tillthethingbecomesaburden,thenyoucanstop。Andwhetheryouforgetmeornot——and,Geoffrey,Idonotthinkyouwill——youwillknowthatIshallneverforgetyou,whomIsavedfromthesea——toloveme。”
Therewassomethingsosweetandinfinitelytenderaboutherwords,instinctastheywerewithnaturalwomanlypassion,thatGeoffreybentatheartbeneaththeirweightasafirbendsbeneaththegentle,gatheringsnow。Whatwashetodo,howcouldheleaveher?Andyetshewasright。Hemustgo,andgoquickly,lesthisstrengthmightfailhim,andhandinhandtheyshouldpassabournefromwhichthereisnoreturn。
“Heavenhelpus,Beatrice。”hesaid。“Iwillgoto-morrowmorningand,ifIcan,Iwillkeepaway。”
“You/must/keepaway。Iwillnotseeyouanymore。Iwillnotbringtroubleonyou,Geoffrey。”
“Youtalkofbringingtroubleonme。”hesaid;“yousaynothingofyourself,andyetaman,evenamanwitheyesonhimlikemyself,isbetterfittedtoweathersuchastorm。Ifitruinedme,howmuchmorewoulditruinyou?”
TheywereatthegateoftheVicaragenow,andthewindrushedsostronglythroughthefirsthatsheneededtoputherlipsquiteclosetohiseartomakeherwordsheard。
“Stop,oneminute。”shesaid,“perhapsyoudonotquiteunderstand。
WhenawomandoeswhatIhavedone,itisbecausesheloveswithallherlifeandheartandsoul,becausealltheseareapartofherlove。
Formyself,Inolongercareanything——Ihave/no/selfawayfromyou;
Ihaveceasedtobeofmyselforinmyownkeeping。Iamofyouandinyours。FormyselfandmyownfateornameIthinknomore;withmyeyesopenandofmyownfreewillIhavegiveneverythingtoyou,andamgladandhappytogiveit。ButforyouIstilldocare,andifI
tookanystep,orallowedyoutotakeanythatcouldbringsorrowonyou,Ishouldneverforgivemyself。Thatiswhywemustpart,Geoffrey。Andnowletusgoin;thereisnothingmoretosay,exceptthis:ifyouwishtobidmegood-bye,alastgood-bye,dearGeoffrey,Iwillmeetyouto-morrowmorningonthebeach。”
“Ishallleaveathalf-pasteight。”hesaidhoarsely。
“Thenwewillmeetatseven。”Beatricesaid,andledthewayintothehouse。
ElizabethandMr。Grangerwerealreadyseatedatsupper。TheysuppedatnineonSundaynights;itwasjusthalf-past。
“Dearme。”saidtheoldgentleman,“webegantothinkthatyoutwomusthavebeenoutcanoeingandgotyourselvesdrownedingoodearnestthistime。Whathaveyoubeendoing?”
“Wehavehadalongwalk。”answeredGeoffrey;“Ididnotknowthatitwassolate。”
“Onewantstobepleasedwithone’scompanytowalkfaronsuchanightasthis。”putinElizabethmaliciously。
“Andsowewere——atleastIwas。”Geoffreyansweredwithperfecttruth,“andthenightisnotsobadasyoumightthink,atleastundertheleeofthecliffs。Itwillbeworsebyandby!“
Thentheysatdownandmadeadesperateshowofeatingsupper。
Elizabeth,thekeen-eyed,noticedthatGeoffrey’shandwasshaking。
Nowwhat,shewondered,wouldmakethehandofastrongmanshakelikealeaf?Deepemotionmightdoit,andElizabeththoughtthatshedetectedothersignsofemotioninthemboth,besidesthatofGeoffrey’sshakinghand。Theplotwasworkingwell,butcoulditbebroughttoaclimax?Oh,ifhewouldonlythrowprudencetothewindsandrunawaywithBeatrice,sothatshemightberidofher,andfreetofightforherownhand。
ShortlyaftersupperbothElizabethandBeatricewenttobed,leavingtheirfatherwithGeoffrey。
“Well。”saidMr。Granger,“didyougetawordwithBeatrice?Itwasverykindofyoutogothatlongtramponpurpose。Gracious,howitblows!weshallhavethehousedownpresently。Lightning,too,I
declare。”
“Yes。”answeredGeoffrey,“Idid。”
“Ah,Ihopeyoutoldherthattherewasnoneedforhertogiveuphopeofhimyet,ofMr。Davies,Imean?”
“Yes,Itoldherthat——thatisifthegreaterincludestheless。”headdedtohimself。
“Andhowdidshetakeit?”
“Verybadly。”saidGeoffrey;“sheseemedtothinkthatIhadnorighttointerfere。”
“Indeed,thatisstrange。Butitdoesn’tmeananything。She’sgratefulenoughtoyouatheart,dependuponitsheis,onlyshedidnotliketosayso。Dearme,howitblows;weshallhaveanightofit,aregulargale,Ideclare。Soyouaregoingawayto-morrowmorning。
Well,thebestoffriendsmustpart。Ihopethatyouwilloftencomeandseeus。Good-bye。”
OncemoreasenseoftheironyofthepositionovercameGeoffrey,andhesmiledgrimlyashelithiscandleandwenttobed。Atthebackofthehousewasalongpassage,whichterminatedatoneendintheroomwhereheslept,andattheotherinthatoccupiedbyElizabethandBeatrice。Thispassagewaslitbytwowindows,andbuiltoutofitweretwomorerooms——thatofMr。Granger,andanotherwhichhadbeenEffie’s。Thewindowsofthepassage,likemostoftheothersintheVicarage,wereinnocentofshutters,andGeoffreystoodforamomentatoneofthem,watchingthelightningilluminethebroadbreastofthemountainbehind。ThenlookingtowardsthedoorofBeatrice’sroom,hegazedatitwiththepeculiarreverencethatsometimesafflictspeoplewhoareverymuchinlove,and,withasigh,turnedandsoughthisown。
Hecouldnotsleep,itwasimpossible。Fornearlytwohourshelayturningfromsidetoside,andthinkingtillhisbrainseemedliketoburst。To-morrowhemustleaveher,leaveherforever,andgobacktohiscoarseunprofitablestrugglewiththeworld,wheretherewouldbenoBeatricetomakehimhappythroughitall。Andshe,whatofher?
Thestormhadlulledalittle,nowitcamebackinstrength,heraldedbythelightning。Herose,threwonadressing-gown,andsatbyawindowwatchingit。Itstumultandfuryseemedtoeasehisheartofsomelittleofitspain;inthatdarkhouraquietnightwouldhavemaddenedhim。
Ineighthours——eightshorthours——thismatterwouldbeendedsofarasconcernedtheiractualintercourse。Itwouldbeasecretlockedforeverintheirtwobreasts,asecreteatingattheirhearts,cruelasthewormthatdiethnot。Geoffreylookedupandthrewouthisheart’sthoughttowardshissleepinglove。Thenoncemore,asinabygonenight,therebrokeuponhisbrainandbeingthatmysteriousspiritualsense。Strongerandmorestrongitgrew,beatingonhiminheavyunnaturalwaves,tillhisreasonseemedtoreelandsink,andherememberednaughtbutBeatrice,knewnaughtsavethatherverylifewaswithhimnow。
Hestretchedouthisarmstowardstheplacewheresheshouldbe。
“Beatrice。”hewhisperedtotheemptyair,“Beatrice!Oh,mylove!mysweet!mysoul!Hearme,Beatrice!“
Therecameapause,andevertheunearthlysympathygrewandgatheredinhisheart,tillitseemedtohimasthoughseparationhadlostitspowerandacrossdividingspacetheyweremingledinonebeing。
Agreatgustshookthehouseandpassedawayalongtheroaringdepths。
Oh!whatwasthis?Silentlythedooropened,andawhitedrapedformpasseditsthreshold。Herose,gasping;aterriblefear,aterriblejoy,tookpossessionofhim。Thelightningflaredoutwildlyintheeasternsky。Thereinthefiercelightshestoodbeforehim——she,Beatrice,asightofbeautyandofdread。Shestoodwithwhitearmsoutstretched,withwhiteuncoveredfeet,herbosomheavingsoftlybeneathhernight-dress,herstreaminghairunbound,herlipsapart,herfaceupturned,andastampofterrifyingcalm。
“Inthewide,blindeyesupliftThro’thedarknessandthedrift。”
GreatHeaven,shewasasleep!
Hush!shespoke。
“Youcalledme,Geoffrey。”shesaid,inastill,unnaturalvoice。“Youcalledme,mybeloved,andI——have——come。”
Heroseaghast,tremblinglikeanaspenwithdoubtandfear,tremblingatthesightoftheconqueringgloryofthewomanwhomheworshipped。
See!Shedrewontowardshim,andshewas/asleep/。Oh,whatcouldhedo?
Suddenlythedraughtofthegreatgalerushingthroughthehousecaughttheopeneddoorandcrasheditto。
Sheawokewithawildstareofterror。
“Oh,God,whereamI?”shecried。
“Hush,foryourlife’ssake!“heanswered,hisfacultiesreturning。
“Hush!oryouarelost。”
Buttherewasnoneedtocautionheretosilence,forBeatrice’ssensesfailedherattheshock,andshesankswooninginhisarms。
第7章