首页 >出版文学> The Longest Journey>第5章
  Tilliardfledintoahansom,cursinghimselfforhavingtriedtodothethingcheaply。Hornbloweralsosweptpastyellingderisively,withhisluggageneatlypiledabovehishead。"Let’sgetoutandwalk,"mutteredAnsell。ButRickiewassuccouringadistressedfemale——Mrs。Aberdeen。
  "Oh,Mrs。Aberdeen,Ineversawyou:Iamsogladtoseeyou——I
  amsoveryglad。"Mrs。Aberdeenwascold。Shedidnotlikebeingspokentooutsidethecollege,andwasalsodistraitaboutherbasket。Hithertonogenteeleyehadevenseeninsideit,butinthecollisionitslittlecalicoveilfelloff,andtherevasrevealed——nothing。Thebasketwasempty,andneverwouldholdanythingillegal。Allthesameshewasdistrait,and"Weshallmeetlater,sir,Idessy,"wasallthegreetingRickiegotfromher。
  "NowwhatkindofalifehasMrs。Aberdeen?"heexclaimed,asheandAnsellpursuedtheStationRoad。"Herethesebedderscomeandmakeuscomfortable。Weoweanenormousamounttothem,theirwagesareabsurd,andweknownothingaboutthem。OfftheygotoBarnwell,andthentheirlivesarehidden。IjustknowthatMrs。
  Aberdeenhasahusband,butthat’sall。Sheneverwilltalkabouthim。NowIdosowanttofillinherlife。Iseeone—halfofit。
  What’stheotherhalf?Shemayhavearealjollyhouse,ingoodtaste,withalittlegardenandbooks,andpictures。Or,again,shemayn’t。Butinanycaseoneoughttoknow。Iknowshe’ddislikeit,butsheoughtn’ttodislike。Afterall,beddersaretoblameforthepresentlamentablestateofthings,justasmuchasgentlefolk。Sheoughttowantmetocome。Sheoughttointroducemetoherhusband。"
  TheyhadreachedthecornerofHillsRoad。Ansellspokeforthefirsttime。Hesaid,"Ugh!"
  "Drains?"
  "Yes。Aspiritualcesspool。"
  Rickielaughed。
  "Iexpecteditfromyourletter。"
  "Theoneyouneveranswered?"
  "Ianswernoneofyourletters。Youarequitehopelessbynow。
  Youcangotothebad。ButIrefusetoaccompanyyou。Irefusetobelievethateveryhumanbeingisamovingwonderofsupremeinterestandtragedyandbeauty——whichwaswhattheletterinquestionamountedto。You’llfindplentywhowillbelieveit。
  It’saverypopularviewamongpeoplewhoaretooidletothink;
  itsavesthemthetroubleofdetectingthebeautifulfromtheugly,theinterestingfromthedull,thetragicfromthemelodramatic。YouhadjustcomefromSawston,andwereapparentlycarriedawaybythefactthatMissPembrokehadtheusualamountofarmsandlegs。"
  Rickiewassilent。Hehadtoldhisfriendhowhefelt,butnotwhathadhappened。Ansellcoulddiscussloveanddeathadmirably,butsomehowhewouldnotunderstandloversoradyingman,andinthelettertherehadbeenscantallusiontotheseconcretefacts。
  WouldCambridgeunderstandthemeither?Hewatchedsomedonswhowerepeepingintoanexcavation,andthrowinguptheirhandswithhumorousgesturesofdespair。ThesemenwouldlecturenextweekonCatiline’sconspiracy,onLuther,onEvolution,onCatullus。
  Theydealtwithsomuchandtheyhadexperiencedsolittle。WasitpossiblehewouldevercometothinkCambridgenarrow?InhisshortlifeRickiehadknowntwosuddendeaths,andthatisenoughtodisarrangeanyplacidoutlookontheworld。Heknewonceforallthatweareallofusbubblesonanextremelyroughsea。Intothisseahumanityhasbuilt,asitwere,somelittlebreakwaters——scientificknowledge,civilizedrestraint——sothatthebubblesdonotbreaksofrequentlvorsosoon。Buttheseahasnotaltered,anditwasonlyachancethathe,Ansell,Tilliard,andMrs。Aberdeenhadnotallbeenkilledinthetram。
  TheywaitedfortheothertrambytheRomanCatholicChurch,whosefloridbulkwasalreadyrecedingintotwilight。Itisthefirstbigbuildingthattheincomingvisitorsees。"Oh,herecomethecolleges!"criestheProtestantparent,andthenlearnsthatitwasbuiltbyaPapistwhomadeafortuneoutofmovableeyesfordolls。"Builtoutofdoll’seyestocontainidols"——that,atallevents,isthelegendandthejoke。Itwatchesovertheapostatecity,tallerbymanyayardthananythingwithin,andasserting,howeverwildly,thathereiseternity,stability,andbubblesunbreakableuponawindlesssea。
  Acostlyhymntuneannouncedfiveo’clock,andinthedistancethemorelovablenoteofSt。Mary’scouldbeheard,speakingfromtheheartofthetown。Thenthetramarrived——theslowstuffytramthatplieseverytwentyminutesbetweentheunknownandthemarketplace——andtookthempastthedesecratedgroundsofDowning,pastAddenbrookesHospital,girtlikeaVenetianpalacewithamantlingcanal,pasttheFitzWilliam,toweringuponimmensesubstructionslikeanyRomantemple,rightuptothegatesofone’sowncollege,whichlookedlikenothingelseintheworld。
  Theportersweregladtoseethem,butwishedithadbeenahansom。"Ourluggage,"explainedRickie,"comesinthehotelomnibus,ifyouwouldkindlypayashillingformine。"Ansellturnedasidetosomelargelightedwindows,theabodeofahospitabledon,andfromotherwindowstherefloatedfamiliarvoicesandthefamiliarmistakesinaBeethovensonata。Thecollege,thoughsmall,wascivilized,andproudofitscivilization。ItwasnotsufficientglorytobeaBluethere,noranadditionalglorytogetdrunk。ManyamaidenladywhohadreadthatCambridgemenweresaddogs,wassurprisedandperhapsalittledisappointedatthereasonablelifewhichgreetedher。
  MissAppleblossominparticularhadhadatremendousshock。ThesightofyoungfellowsmakingteaanddrinkingwaterhadmadeherwonderwhetherthiswasCambridgeCollegeatall。"Itisso,"sheexclaimedafterwards。"ItisjustasIsay;andwhat’smore,I
  wouldn’thaveitotherwise;Stewartsaysit’saseasyaseasytogetintotheswim,andnotatallexpensive。"Thedirectionoftheswimwasdeterminedalittlebythegeniusoftheplace——forplaceshaveagenius,thoughthelesswetalkaboutitthebetter——andagooddealbythetutorsandresidentfellows,whotreatedwithraredexteritytheproductsthatcameupyearlyfromthepublicschools。Theytaughttheperkyboythathewasnoteverything,andthelimpboythathemightbesomething。Theyevenwelcomedthoseboyswhowereneitherlimpnorperky,butodd——thoseboyswhohadneverbeenatapublicschoolatall,andsuchdonotfindawelcomeeverywhere。Andtheydideverythingwithease——onemightalmostsaywithnonchalance,sothattheboysnoticednothing,andreceivededucation,oftenforthefirsttimeintheirlives。
  ButRickieturnedtononeofthesefriends,forjustthenhelovedhisroomsbetterthananyperson。Theywereallhereallypossessedintheworld,theonlyplacehecouldcallhisown。
  Overthedoorwashisname,andthroughthepaint,likeagreyghost,hecouldstillreadthenameofhispredecessor。Withasighofjoyheenteredtheperishablehomethatwashisforacoupleofyears。Therewasabeautifulfire,andthekettleboiledatonce。Hemadeteaonthehearth—rugandatethebiscuitswhichMrs。AberdeenhadbroughtforhimupfromAnderson’s。"Gentlemen,"shesaid,"mustlearntogiveandtake。"
  Hesighedagainandagain,likeonewhohadescapedfromdanger。
  Withhisheadonthefenderandallhislimbsrelaxed,hefeltalmostassafeashefeltoncewhenhismotherkilledaghostinthepassagebycarryinghimthroughitinherarms。Therewasnoghostnow;hewasfrightenedatreality;hewasfrightenedatthesplendoursandhorrorsoftheworld。
  AletterfromMissPembrokewasonthetable。Hedidnothurrytoopenit,forshe,andallthatshedid,wasoverwhelming。ShewroteliketheSibyl;hersorrowfulfacemovedoverthestarsandshatteredtheirharmonies;lastnighthesawherwiththeeyesofBlake,avirginwidow,tall,veiled,consecrated,withherhandsstretchedoutagainstaneverlastingwind。Whvshouldshewrite?
  Herletterswerenotforthelikesofhim,nortobereadinroomslikehis。
  "WearenotleavingSawston,"shewrote。"IsawhowselfishitwasofmetoriskspoilingHerbert’scareer。Ishallgetusedtoanyplace。Nowthatheisgone,nothingofthatsortcanmatter。
  Everyonehasbeenmostkind,butyouhavecomfortedmemost,thoughyoudidnotmeanto。Icannotthinkhowyoudidit,orunderstoodsomuch。Istillthinkofyouasalittleboywithalameleg,——Iknowyouwillletmesaythis,——andyetwhenitcametothepointyouknewmorethanpeoplewhohavebeenalltheirliveswithsorrowanddeath。"
  Rickieburntthisletter,whichheoughtnottohavedone,foritwasoneofthefewtributesMissPembrokeeverpaidtoimagination。Buthefeltthatitdidnotbelongtohim:wordssosincereshouldbeforGeraldalone。Thesmokerushedupthechimney,andheindulgedinavision。Hesawitreachtheouterairandbeatagainstthelowceilingofclouds。Thecloudsweretoostrongforit;butinthemwasonechink,revealingonestar,andthroughthisthesmokeescapedintothelightofstarsinnumerable。Then——butthenthevisionfailed,andthevoiceofsciencewhisperedthatallsmokeremainsonearthintheformofsmuts,andistroublesometoMrs。Aberdeen。
  "Iamjollyunpractical,"hemused。"Andwhatisthepointofitwhenrealthingsaresowonderful?WhowantsvisionsinaworldthathasAgnesandGerald?"Heturnedontheelectriclightandpulledopenthetable—drawer。There,amongspoonsandcorksandstring,hefoundafragmentofalittlestorythathehadtriedtowritelastterm。Itwascalled"TheBayoftheFifteenIslets,"andtheactiontookplaceonSt。John’sEveoffthecoastofSicily。Apartyoftouristslandononeoftheislands。
  Suddenlytheboatmenbecomeuneasy,andsaythattheislandisnotgenerallythere。Itisanextraone,andtheyhadbetterhaveteaononeoftheordinaries。"Pooh,volcanic!"saystheleadingtourist,andtheladiessayhowinteresting。Theislandbeginstorock,andsodothemindsofitsvisitors。Theystartandquarrelandjabber。Fingersburstupthroughthesand—blackfingersofseadevils。Theislandtilts。Thetouristsgomad。Butjustbeforethecatastropheoneman,integervitcescelerisquepurus,seesthetruth。Herearenodevils。Othermuscles,otherminds,arepullingtheislandtoitssubterraneanhome。Throughtheadvancingwallofwatersheseesnogrislyfaces,noghastlymedievallimbs,but——Butwhatnonsense!Whenrealthingsaresowonderful,whatisthepointofpretending?
  AndsoRickiedeflectedhisenthusiasms。Hithertotheyhadplayedongodsandheroes,ontheinfiniteandtheimpossible,onvirtueandbeautyandstrength。Now,withasteadierradiance,theytransfiguredamanwhowasdeadandawomanwhowasstillalive。
  VII
  Love,sayorderlypeople,canbefallenintobytwomethods:(1)
  throughthedesires,(2)throughtheimagination。AndiftheorderlypeopleareEnglish,theyaddthat(1)istheinferiormethod,andcharacteristicoftheSouth。Itisinferior。Yetthosewhopursueitatalleventsknowwhattheywant;theyarenotpuzzlingtothemselvesorludicroustoothers;theydonottakethewingsofthemorningandflyintotheuttermostpartsoftheseabeforewalkingtotheregistryoffice;theycannotbreedatragedyquitelikeRickie’s。
  Heis,ofcourse,absurdlyyoung——nottwenty—oneandhewillbeengagedtobemarriedattwenty—three。Hehasnoknowledgeoftheworld;forexample,hethinksthatifyoudonotwantmoneyyoucangiveittofriendswhodo。Hebelievesinhumanitybecauseheknowsadozendecentpeople。Hebelievesinwomenbecausehehaslovedhismother。Andhisfriendsareasyoungandasignorantashimself。Theyarefullofthewineoflife。Buttheyhavenottastedthecup——letuscallittheteacup——ofexperience,whichhasmademenofMr。Pembroke’stypewhattheyare。Oh,thatteacup!Tobetakenatprayers,atfriendship,atlove,tillwearequitesane,efficient,quiteexperienced,andquiteuselesstoGodorman。Wemustdrinkit,orweshalldie。Butweneednotdrinkitalways。Hereisourproblemandoursalvation。Therecomesamoment——Godknowswhen——atwhichwecansay,"Iwillexperiencenolonger。Iwillcreate。Iwillbeanexperience。"
  Buttodothiswemustbebothacuteandheroic。Foritisnoteasy,afteracceptingsixcupsoftea,tothrowtheseventhinthefaceofthehostess。AndtoRickiethismomenthasnot,asyet,beenoffered。
  Ansell,attheendofhisthirdyear,gotafirstintheMoralScienceTripos。Beingascholar,hekepthisroomsincollege,andatoncebegantoworkforaFellowship。RickiegotacreditablesecondintheClassicalTripos,PartI。,andretiredtosallowlodgingsinMillbane,carryingwithhimthedegreeofB。A。andasmallexhibition,whichwasquiteasmuchashedeserved。ForPartII。hereadGreekArchaeology,andgotasecond。AllthismeansthatAnsellwasmuchclevererthanRickie。
  Asforthecow,shewasstillgoingstrong,thoughturningalittleacademicastheyearspassedoverher。
  "Weareboundtogetnarrow,"sighedRickie。Heandhisfriendwerelyinginameadowduringtheirlastsummerterm。Inhisincurableloveforflowershehadplaitedtwogarlandsofbuttercupsandcow—parsley,andAnsell’sleanJewishfacewasframedinoneofthem。"Cambridgeiswonderful,but——butit’ssotiny。Youhavenoidea——atleast,Ithinkyouhavenoidea——howthegreatworldlooksdownonit。"
  "Ireadthelettersinthepapers。"
  "It’sabadlook—out。"
  "How?"
  "Cambridgehaslosttouchwiththetimes。"
  "Wassheeverintendedtotouchthem?"
  "Shesatisfies,"saidRickiemysteriously,"neithertheprofessions,northepublicschools,northegreatthinkingmassofmenandwomen。Thereisageneralfeelingthatherdayisover,andnaturallyonefeelsprettysick。"
  "Doyoustillwriteshortstories?"
  "BecauseyourEnglishhasgonetothedevil。YouthinkandtalkinJournalese。Defineagreatthinkingmass。"
  Rickiesatupandadjustedhisfloralcrown。
  "Estimatetheworthofageneralfeeling。"
  Silence。
  "Andthirdly,whereisthegreatworld?"
  "Ohthat——!"
  "Yes。That,"exclaimedAnsell,risingfromhiscouchinviolentexcitement。"Whereisit?Howdoyousetaboutfindingit?Howlongdoesittaketogetthere?Whatdoesitthink?Whatdoesitdo?Whatdoesitwant?Obligemewithspecimensofitsartandliterature。"Silence。"Tillyoudo,myopinionswillbeasfollows:Thereisnogreatworldatall,onlyalittleearth,foreverisolatedfromtherestofthelittlesolarsystem。Theearthisfulloftinysocieties,andCambridgeisoneofthem。Allthesocietiesarenarrow,butsomearegoodandsomearebad——justasonehouseisbeautifulinsideandanotherugly。Observethemetaphorofthehouses:Iamcomingbacktoit。Thegoodsocietiessay,`ItellyoutodothisbecauseIamCambridge。’
  Thebadonessay,`ItellyoutodothatbecauseIamthegreatworld,notbecauseIam’Peckham,’or`Billingsgate,’or`ParkLane,’but`becauseIamthegreatworld。’Theylie。Andfoolslikeyoulistentothem,andbelievethattheyareathingwhichdoesnotexistandneverhasexisted,andconfuse’great,’whichhasnomeaningwhatever,with’good,’whichmeanssalvation。Lookatthisgreatwreath:it’llbedeadtomorrow。Lookatthatgoodflower:it’llcomeupagainnextyear。Nowfortheothermetaphor。TocomparetheworldtoCambridgeislikecomparingtheoutsidesofhouseswiththeinsideofahouse。Nointellectualeffortisneeded,nomoralresultisattained。Youonlyhavetosay,’Oh,whatadifference!’andthencomeindoorsagainandexhibityourbroadenedmind。"
  "Inevershallcomeindoorsagain,"saidRickie。"That’sthewholepoint。"Andhisvoicebegantoquiver。"It’swellenoughforthosewho’llgetaFellowship,butinafewweeksIshallgodown。Inafewyearsit’llbeasifI’veneverbeenup。Itmattersverymuchtomewhattheworldislike。Ican’tansweryourquestionsaboutit;andthat’snolosstoyou,butsomuchtheworseforme。Andthenyou’vegotahouse——notametaphoricalone,butahousewithfatherandsisters。Ihaven’t,andnevershallhave。There’llneveragainbeahomeformelikeCambridge。
  Ishallonlylookattheoutsideofhomes。Accordingtoyourmetaphor,Ishallliveinthestreet,anditmattersverymuchtomewhatIfindthere。"
  "You’llliveinanotherhouserightenough,"saidAnsell,ratheruneasily。"Onlytakecareyoupickoutadecentone。Ican’tthinkwhyyouflopaboutsohelplessly,likeabitofseaweed。Infouryearsyou’vetakenasmuchrootasanyone。"
  "Where?"
  "Ishouldsayyou’vebeenfortunateinyourfriends。"
  "Oh——that!"Buthewasnotcynical——orcynicalinaverytenderway。Hewasthinkingoftheironyoffriendship——sostrongitis,andsofragile。Weflytogether,likestrawsinaneddy,topartintheopenstream。Naturehasnouseforus:shehascutherstuffdifferently。Dutifulsons,lovinghusbands,responsiblefathersthesearewhatshewants,andifwearefriendsitmustbeinoursparetime。AbramandSaraiweresorrowful,yettheirseedbecameassandofthesea,anddistractsthepoliticsofEuropeatthismoment。ButafewversesofpoetryisallthatsurvivesofDavidandJonathan。
  "Iwishwewerelabelled,"saidRickie。HewishedthatalltheconfidenceandmutualknowledgethatisborninsuchaplaceasCambridgecouldbeorganized。Peoplewentdownintotheworldsaying,"Weknowandlikeeachother;weshan’tforget。"Buttheydidforget,formanissomadethathecannotrememberlongwithoutasymbol;hewishedtherewasasociety,akindoffriendshipoffice,wherethemarriageoftruemindscouldberegistered。
  "Whylabels?"
  "Toknoweachotheragain。"
  "Ihavetaughtyoupessimismsplendidly。"Helookedathiswatch。
  "Whattime?"
  "Nottwelve。"
  Rickiegotup。
  "Whygo?"HestretchedouthishandandcaughtholdofRickie’sankle。
  "I’vegotthatMissPembroketolunch——thatgirlwhomyousaynever’sthere。"
  "Thenwhygo?AllthisweekyouhavepretendedMissPembrokeawaitedyou。Wednesday——MissPembroketolunch。Thursday——MissPembroketotea。Nowagain——andyoudidn’teveninviteher。"
  "ToCambridge,no。ButtheHallmanthey’restoppingwithhassomanyengagementsthatsheandherfriendcanoftencometome,I’mgladtosay。Idon’tthinkIevertoldyoumuch,butovertwoyearsagothemanshewasgoingtomarrywaskilledatfootball。
  Shenearlydiedofgrief。ThisvisittoCambridgeisalmostthefirstamusementshehasfeltuptotaking。Oh,theygobacktomorrow!Givemebreakfasttomorrow。"
  "Allright。"
  "ButIshallseeyouthisevening。IshallberoundatyourpaperonSchopenhauer。Lemmego。"
  "Don’tgo,"hesaididly。"It’smuchbetterforyoutotalktome。"
  "Lemmego,Stewart。"
  "It’samusingthatyou’resofeeble。You——simply——can’t——get——
  away。
  IwishIwantedtobullyyou。"
  Rickielaughed,andsuddenlyoverbalancedintothegrass。
  Ansell,withunusualplayfulness,heldhimprisoner。Theylaythereforfewminutes,talkingandraggingaimlessly。ThenRickieseizedhisopportunityandjerkedaway。
  "Go,go!"yawnedtheother。Buthewasalittlevexed,forhewasayoungmanwithgreatcapacityforpleasure,anditpleasedhimthatmorningtobewithhisfriend。Thethoughtoftwoladieswaitinglunchdidnotdeterhim;stupidwomen,whyshouldn’ttheywait?Whyshouldtheyinterferewiththeirbetters?WithhisearonthegroundhelistenedtoRickie’sdepartingsteps,andthought,"Hewastesalotoftimekeepingengagements。Whywillhebepleasanttofools?"Andthenhethought,"Whyhasheturnedsounhappy?Itisn’tasithe’saphilosopher,ortriestosolvetheriddleofexistence。Andhe’sgotmoneyofhisown:"Thusthinking,hefellasleep。
  MeanwhileRickiehurriedawayfromhim,andslackenedandstopped,andhurriedagain。HewasdueattheUnionintenminutes,buthecouldnotbringhimselfthere。HedarednotmeetMissPembroke:helovedher。
  Thedevilmusthaveplannedit。Theyhadstartedsogloriously;
  shehadbeenagoddessbothinjoyandsorrow。Shewasagoddessstill。Buthehaddethronedthegodwhomoncehehadglorifiedequally。Slowly,slowly,theimageofGeraldhadfaded。Thatwasthefirststep。Rickiehadthought,"Nomatter。Hewillbebrightagain。Justnowalltheradiancechancestobeinher。"Andonherhehadfixedhiseyes。Hethoughtofherawake。Heentertainedherwillinglyindreams。Hefoundherinpoetryandmusicandinthesunset。Shemadehimkindandstrong。Shemadehimclever。ThroughherhekeptCambridgeinitsproperplace,andlivedasacitizenofthegreatworld。Butonenighthedreamtthatshelayinhisarms。Thisdispleasedhim。HedeterminedtothinkalittleaboutGeraldinstead。Thenthefabriccollapsed。
  ItwashardonRickiethustomeetthedevil。Hedidnotdeserveit,forhewascomparativelycivilized,andknewthattherewasnothingshamefulinlove。Buttolovethiswoman!Ifonlyithadbeenanyoneelse!Loveinreturn——thathecouldexpectfromnoone,beingtoouglyandtoounattractive。Buttheloveheofferedwouldnotthenhavebeenvile。TheinsulttoMissPembroke,whowasconsecrated,andwhomhehadconsecrated,whocouldstillseeGerald,andalwayswouldseehim,shiningonhiseverlastingthronethiswasthecrimefromthedevil,thecrimethatnopenancewouldeverpurge。Sheknewnothing。Sheneverwouldknow。
  Butthecrimewasregisteredinheaven。
  HehadbeentemptedtoconfideinAnsell。Buttowhatpurpose?Hewouldsay,"IloveMissPembroke。"andStewartwouldreply,"Youass。"Andthen。"I’mnevergoingtotellher。""Youass,"again。
  Afterall,itwasnotapracticalquestion;Agneswouldneverhearofhisfall。Ifhisfriendhadbeen,asheexpressedit,"labelled";ifhehadbeenafather,orstillbetterabrother,onemighttellhimofthediscreditablepassion。Butwhyirritatehimfornoreason?Thinking"Iamalwaysanglingforsympathy;I
  muststopmyself,"hehurriedonwardtotheUnion。
  Hefoundhisguestshalfwayupthestairs,readingtheadvertisementsofcoachesfortheLongVacation。HeheardMrs。
  Lewinsay,"Iwonderwhathe’llendbydoing。"Alittleoveractinghispart,heapologizednonchalantlyforhislateness。
  "It’salwaysthesame,"criedAgnes。"LasttimeheforgotIwascomingaltogether。"Sheworeafloweredmuslin——somethingindescribablyliquidandcool。Itremindedhimalittleofthoseswiftpiercingstreams,neitherbluenorgreen,thatgushoutofthedolomites。Herfacewasclearandbrown,likethefaceofamountaineer;herhairwassoplentifulthatitseemedbankedupaboveit;andherlittletoque,thoughitansweredthenoteofthedress,wasalmostludicrous,poisedonsomuchnaturalglory。
  Whenshemoved,thesunlightflashedonherear—rings。
  Heledthemuptotheluncheon—room。Bynowhewasconsciousofhislimitationsasahost,andneverattemptedtoentertainladiesinhislodgings。Moreover,theUnionseemedlessintimate。
  IthadafaintflavourofaLondonclub;itmarkedtheundergraduate’snearestapproachtothegreatworld。Amiditswaitersandserviettesonefeltimpersonal,andabletoconcealtheprivateemotions。RickiefeltthatifMissPembrokeknewonethingabouthim,shekneweverything。Duringthisvisithetookhertonoplacethathegreatlyloved。
  "Sitdown,ladies。Fallto。I’msorry。IwasouttowardsCotonwithadreadfulfriend。"
  Mrs。Lewinpushedupherveil。ShewasatypicalMay—termchaperon,alwayspleasant,alwayshungry,andalwaystired。YearafteryearshecameuptoCambridgeinatightsilkdress,andyearafteryearshenearlydiedofit。Herfeethurt,herlimbswerecrampedinacanoe,blackspotsdancedbeforehereyesfromeatingtoomuchmayonnaise。Butstillshecame,ifnotasamotherasanaunt,ifnotasanauntasafriend。StillsheascendedtheroofofKing’s,stillshecountedtheballsofClare,stillshewasonthepointofgraspingtheorganizationoftheMayraces。"Andwhoisyourfriend?"sheasked。
  "HisnameisAnsell。"
  "Well,now,didIseehimtwoyearsago——asabedmakerinsomethingtheydidattheFootLights?Oh,howIroared。"
  "Youdidn’tseeMr。AnsellattheFootLights,"saidAgnes,smiling。
  "Howdoyouknow?"askedRickie。
  "He’dscarcelybesofrivolous。"
  "Doyourememberseeinghim?"
  "Foramoment。"
  Whatamemoryshehad!Andhowsplendidlyduringthatmomentshehadbehaved!
  "Isn’themarvellouslyclever?"
  "Ibelieveso。"
  "Oh,givemecleverpeople!"criedMrs。Lewin。"TheyarekindnessitselfattheHall,butIassureyouIamdepressedattimes。Onecannottalkbump—rowingforever。"
  "Ineverhearabouthim,Rickie;butisn’thereallyyourgreatestfriend?"
  "Idon’tgoinforgreatestfriends。"
  "Doyoumeanyoulikeusallequally?"
  "Alldifferently,thoseofyouIlike。"
  "Ah,you’vecaughtit!"criedMrs。Lewin。"Mr。Elliotgaveityoutherewell。"
  Agneslaughed,and,herelbowsonthetable,regardedthemboththroughherfingers——ahabitofhers。Thenshesaid,"Can’tweseethegreatMr。Ansell?"
  "Oh,let’s。Orwouldhefrightenme?"
  "Hewouldfrightenyou,"saidRickie。"He’satrifleweird。"
  "MygoodRickie,ifyouknewthedeathlydullnessofSawston——
  everyonesayingtheproperthingatthepropertime,Isoproper,Herbertsoproper!Why,weirdnessistheonethingIlongfor!Doarrangesomething。"
  "I’mafraidthere’snoopportunity。Ansellgoessomevastbicycleridethisafternoon;thiseveningyou’retiedupattheHall;andtomorrowyougo。"
  "Butthere’sbreakfasttomorrow,"saidAgnes。"Lookhere,Rickie,bringMr。AnselltobreakfastwithusatBuoys。"
  Mrs。Lewinsecondedtheinvitation。
  "Badluckagain,"saidRickieboldly;"I’malreadyfixedupforbreakfast。I’lltellhimofyourverykindintention。"
  "Let’shavehimalone,"murmuredAgnes。
  "Mydeargirl,Ishoulddiethroughthefloor!Oh,it’llbeallrightaboutbreakfast。IratherthinkweshallgetaskedthiseveningbythatshymanwhohastheprettyroomsinTrinity。"
  "Oh,verywell。Whereisityoubreakfast,Rickie?"