MAGISTRATE。Now，supposingwhatyousayandwhatyourhusbandsaysistrue，whatIhavetoconsideris——howdidheobtainaccesstothishouse，andwereyouinanywayapartytohisobtainingaccess？
　　Youarethecharwomanemployedatthehouse？
　　MRS。JONES。Yes，yourWorship，andofcourseifIhadlethimintothehouseitwouldhavebeenverywrongofme;andIhaveneverdonesuchathinginanyofthehouseswhereIhavebeenemployed。
　　MAGISTRATE。Well——soyousay。Nowletushearwhatstorythemaleprisonermakesofit。
　　JONES。[Wholeanswithhisarmsonthedockbehind，speaksinaslow，sullenvoice。]WotIsayiswotmywifesays。I’veneverbeen’adupinapolicecourtbefore，an’IcanproveItookitwheninliquor。Itoldher，andshecantellyouthesame，thatIwasgoin’tothrowthethingintothewatersoonerthen’aveitonmymind。
　　MAGISTRATE。ButhowdidyougetintotheHOUSE？
　　JONES。Iwaspassin’。Iwasgoin’’omefromthe"GoatandBells。"
　　MAGISTRATE。The"GoatandBells，"——whatisthat？Apublic—house？
　　JONES。Yes，atthecorner。ItwasBank’oliday，an’I’d’adadroptodrink。IseethisyoungMr。BARTHWICKtryin’tofindthekeyholeonthewrongsideofthedoor。
　　MAGISTRATE。Well？
　　JONES。[Slowlyandwithmanypauses。]Well———I’elped’imtofindit——drunkasalord’ewas。Hegoeson，an’comesbackagain，andsays，I’vegotnothin’foryou，’esays，butcomeinan’’aveadrink。SoIwentinjustasyoumight’avedoneyourself。We’adadrinko’whiskyjustasyoumighthave’ad，’ndyoungMr。BARTHWICK
　　saystome，"Takeadrink’ndasmoke。Takeanythingyoulike，’esays。"Andthenhewenttosleeponthesofa。I’adsomemorewhisky——an’I’adasmoke——andI’adsomemorewhisky——an’Icarn’ttellyerwhat’appenedafterthat。
　　MAGISTRATE。Doyoumeantosaythatyouweresodrunkthatyoucanremembernothing？
　　JACK。[Softlytohisfather。]Isay，that’sexactlywhat。
　　BARTHWICK。TSSh！
　　JONES。That’swhatIdomean。
　　MAGISTRATE。Andyetyousayyoustolethebox？
　　JONES。Ineverstolethebox。Itookit。
　　MAGISTRATE。[Hissingwithprotrudedneck。]Youdidnotstealit——
　　youtookit。Diditbelongtoyou——whatisthatbutstealing？
　　JONES。Itookit。
　　MAGISTRATE。Youtookit——youtookitawayfromtheirhouseandyoutookittoyourhouse。
　　JONES。[Sullenlybreakingin。]Iain’tgotahouse。
　　MAGISTRATE。Verywell，letushearwhatthisyoungmanMr。——Mr。
　　BARTHWICKhastosaytoyourstory。
　　[SNOWleavesthewitness—box。TheBALDCONSTABLEbeckonsJACK，who，clutchinghishat，goesintothewitness—box。ROPERmovestothetablesetapartforhisprofession。]
　　SWEARINGCLERK。Theevidenceyougivetothecourtshallbethetruth，thewholetruth，andnothingbutthetruth，sohelpyouGod。
　　Kissthebook。
　　[Thebookiskissed。]
　　ROPER。[Examining。]Whatisyourname？
　　JACK。[Inalowvoice。]JohnBARTHWICK，Junior。
　　[TheCLERKwritesitdown。]
　　ROPER。Wheredoyoulive？
　　JACK。At6，RockinghamGate。
　　[AllhisanswersarerecordedbytheClerk。]
　　ROPER。Youarethesonoftheowner？
　　JACK。[Inaverylowvoice。]Yes。
　　ROPER。Speakup，please。Doyouknowtheprisoners？
　　JACK。[LookingattheJONESES，inalowvoice。]I’veseenMrs。
　　Jones。I[inaloudvoice]don’tknowtheman。
　　JONES。Well，Iknowyou！
　　BALDCONSTABLE。HSSh！
　　ROPER。Now，didyoucomeinlateonthenightofEasterMonday？
　　JACK。Yes。
　　ROPER。Anddidyoubymistakeleaveyourlatchkeyinthedoor？
　　JACK。Yes。
　　MAGISTRATE。Oh！Youleftyourlatch—keyinthedoor？
　　ROPER。Andisthatallyoucanrememberaboutyourcomingin？
　　JACK。[Inaloudvoice。]Yes，itis。
　　MAGISTRATE。Now，youhaveheardthemaleprisoner’sstory，whatdoyousaytothat？
　　JACK。[TurningtotheMAGISTRATE，speakssuddenlyinaconfident，straight—forwardvoice。]Thefactofthematteris，sir，thatI’dbeenouttothetheatrethatnight，andhadsupperafterwards，andI
　　cameinlate。
　　MAGISTRATE。Doyourememberthismanbeingoutsidewhenyoucamein？
　　JACK。No，Sir。[Hehesitates。]Idon’tthinkIdo。
　　MAGISTRATE。[Somewhatpuzzled。]Well，didhehelpyoutoopenthedoor，ashesays？Didanyonehelpyoutoopenthedoor？
　　JACK。No，sir——Idon’tthinkso，sir——Idon’tknow。
　　MAGISTRATE。Youdon’tknow？Butyoumustknow。Itisn’tausualthingforyoutohavethedooropenedforyou，isit？
　　JACK。[Withashamefacedsmile。]No。
　　MAGISTRATE。Verywell，then。
　　JACK。[Desperately。]Thefactofthematteris，sir，I’mafraidI’dhadtoomuchchampagnethatnight。
　　MAGISTRATE。[Smiling。]Oh！you’dhadtoomuchchampagne？
　　JONES。MayIaskthegentlemanaquestion？
　　MAGISTRATE。Yes——yes——youmayaskhimwhatquestionsyoulike。
　　JONES。Don’tyourememberyousaidyouwasaLiberal，sameasyourfather，andyouaskedmewotIwas？
　　JACK。[Withhishandagainsthisbrow。]Iseemtoremember。
　　JONES。AndIsaidtoyou，"I’mabloomin’Conservative，"Isaid;
　　an’yousaidtome，"Youlookmorelikeoneofthese’ereSocialists。Takewoteveryoulike，"yousaid。
　　JACK。[Withsuddenresolution。]No，Idon’t。Idon’trememberanythingofthesort。
　　JONES。Well，Ido，an’myword’sasgoodasyours。I’veneverbeenhadupinapolicecourtbefore。Look’ere，don’tyourememberyouhadasky—bluebaginyour’and[BARTHWICKjumps。]
　　ROPER。Isubmittoyourworshipthatthesequestionsarehardlytothepoint，theprisonerhavingadmittedthathehimselfdoesnotrememberanything。[ThereisasmileonthefaceofJustice。]Itisacaseoftheblindleadingtheblind。
　　JONES。[Violently。]I’vedonenomorethanwothe’as。I’mapoorman;I’vegotnomoneyan’nofriends——he’satoff——hecandowotI
　　can’t。
　　MAGISTRATE:Now，now？Allthiswon’thelpyou——youmustbequiet。
　　Yousayyoutookthisbox？Now，whatmadeyoutakeit？Wereyoupressedformoney？
　　JONES。I’malwayspressedformoney。
　　MAGISTRATE。Wasthatthereasonyoutookit？
　　JONES。No。
　　MAGISTRATE。[ToSNOW。]Wasanythingfoundonhim？
　　SNOW。Yes，yourworship。Therewassixpoundstwelveshillin’sfoundonhim，andthispurse。
　　[TheredsilkpurseishandedtotheMAGISTRATE。BARTHWICK
　　riseshisseat，buthastilysitsdownagain。]
　　MAGISTRATE。[Staringatthepurse。]Yes，yes——letmesee[Thereisasilence。]No，no，I’venothingbeforemeastothepurse。Howdidyoucomebyallthatmoney？
　　JONES。[Afteralongpause，suddenly。]Ideclinestosay。
　　MAGISTRATE。Butifyouhadallthatmoney，whatmadeyoutakethisbox？
　　JONES。Itookitoutofspite。
　　MAGISTRATE。[Hissing，withprotrudedneck。]Youtookitoutofspite？Wellnow，that’ssomething！Butdoyouimagineyoucangoaboutthetowntakingthingsoutofspite？
　　JONES。Ifyouhadmylife，ifyou’dbeenoutofwork。
　　MAGISTRATE。Yes，yes;Iknow——becauseyou’reoutofworkyouthinkit’sanexcuseforeverything。
　　JONES。[PointingatJACK。]Youask’imwotmade’imtakethe。
　　ROPER。[Quietly。]DoesyourWorshiprequirethiswitnessintheboxanylonger？
　　MAGISTRATE。[Ironically。]Ithinknot;heishardlyprofitable。
　　[JACKleavesthewitness—box，andhanginghishead，resumeshisseat。]
　　JONES。Youask’imwotmade’imtakethelady’s。
　　[ButtheBALDCONSTABLEcatcheshimbythesleeve。]
　　BALDCONSTABLE。SSSh！
　　MAGISTRATE。[Emphatically。]Nowlistentome。
　　I’venothingtodowithwhathemayormaynothavetaken。Whydidyouresistthepoliceintheexecutionoftheirduty？
　　JONES。Itwarn’ttheirdutytotakemywife，arespectablewoman，that’adn’tdonenothing。
　　MAGISTRATE。ButIsayitwas。Whatmadeyoustriketheofficerablow？
　　JONES。Anymanwouldastruck’imablow。I’dstrike’imagain，I
　　would。
　　MAGISTRATE。Youarenotmakingyourcaseanybetterbyviolence。
　　Howdoyousupposewecouldgetonifeverybodybehavedlikeyou？
　　JONES。[Leaningforward，earnestly。]Well，wot，about’er;who’stomakeupto’erforthis？Who’stogive’erback’ergoodname？
　　MRS。JONES。YourWorship，it’sthechildrenthat’spreyingonhismind，becauseofcourseI’velostmywork。AndI’vehadtofindanotherroomowingtothescandal。
　　MAGISTRATE。Yes，yes，Iknow——butifhehadn’tactedlikethisnobodywouldhavesuffered。
　　JONES。[GlaringroundatJACK。]I’vedonenoworsethanwot’e’as。WotIwanttoknowiswot’sgoin’tobedoneto’im。
　　[TheBALDCONSTABLEagainsays"HSSh"]
　　ROPER。Mr。BARTHWICKwishesitknown，yourWorship，thatconsideringthepovertyoftheprisoners，hedoesnotpressthechargeastothebox。PerhapsyourWorshipwoulddealwiththecaseasoneofdisorder。
　　JONES。Idon’twantitsmotheredup，Iwantitalldealtwithfair—
　　—Iwantmyrights。
　　MAGISTRATE。[Rappinghisdesk。]Nowyouhavesaidallyouhavetosay，andyouwillbequiet。
　　[Thereisasilence;theMAGISTRATEbendsoverandparleyswithhisCLERK。]
　　Yes，IthinkImaydischargethewoman。[InakindlyvoiceheaddressesMRS。JONES，whostandsunmovingwithherhandscrossedontherail。]Itisveryunfortunateforyouthatthismanhasbehavedashehas。Itisnottheconsequencestohimbuttheconsequencestoyou。Youhavebeenbroughtheretwice，youhavelostyourwork——
　　[HeglaresatJONES]——andthisiswhatalwayshappens。Nowyoumaygoaway，andIamverysorryitwasnecessarytobringyouhereatall。
　　MRS。JONES。[Softly。]Thankyouverymuch，yourWorship。
　　[Sheleavesthedock，andlookingbackatJONES，twistsherfingersandisstill。]
　　MAGISTRATE。Yes，yes，butIcan’tpassitover。Goaway，there’sagoodwoman。
　　[MRS。JONESstandsback。TheMAGISTRATEleanshisheadonhishand;thenraisingithespeakstoJONES。]
　　Now，listentome。Doyouwishthecasetobesettledhere，ordoyouwishittogobeforeajury？
　　JONES。[Muttering。]Idon’twantnojury。
　　MAGISTRATE。Verywellthen，Iwilldealwithithere。[Afterapause。]Youhavepleadedguiltytostealingthisbox。
　　JONES。Nottostealin’。
　　BALDCONSTABLE。HSSShh！
　　MAGISTRATE。Andtoassaultingthepolice。
　　JONES。Anymanaswasaman。
　　MAGISTRATE。Yourconductherehasbeenmostimproper。Yougivetheexcusethatyouweredrunkwhenyoustolethebox。Itellyouthatisnoexcuse。Ifyouchoosetogetdrunkandbreakthelawafterwardsyoumusttaketheconsequences。Andletmetellyouthatmenlikeyou，whogetdrunkandgivewaytoyourspiteorwhateveritisthat’sinyou，are——are——anuisancetothecommunity。
　　JACK。[Leaningfromhisseat。Dad！that’swhatyousaidtome！
　　BARTHWICK。TSSt！
　　[Thereisasilence，whiletheMAGISTRATEconsultshisCLERK;
　　JONESleansforwardwaiting。]
　　MAGISTRATE。Thisisyourfirstoffence，andIamgoingtogiveyoualightsentence。[Speakingsharply，butwithoutexpression。]Onemonthwithhardlabour。
　　[Hebends，andparleyswithhisCLERK。TheBALDCONSTABLEandanotherhelpJONESfromthedock。]
　　JONES。[Stoppingandtwistinground。]Callthisjustice？Whatabout’im？’Egotdrunk！’Etookthepurse——’etookthepursebut[inamuffledshout]it’s’ismoneygot’imoff——JUSTICE！
　　[Theprisoner’sdoorisshutonJONES，andfromtheseedy—
　　lookingmenandwomencomesahoarseandwhisperinggroan。]
　　MAGISTRATE。Wewillnowadjournforlunch！[Herisesfromhisseat。]
　　[TheCourtisinastir。ROPERgetsupandspeakstothereporter。JACK，throwinguphishead，walkswithaswaggertothecorridor;BARTHWICKfollows。]
　　MRS。JONES。[Turningtohimzenithahumblegesture。]Oh！sir！
　　[BARTHWICKhesitates，thenyieldingtohisnerves，hemakesashame—facedgestureofrefusal，andhurriesoutofcourt。MRS。
　　JONESstandslookingafterhim。]
　　Thecurtainfalls。