Atoneperiodofitsreverses，theHousefellintotheoccupationofaShowman。Hewasfoundregisteredasitsoccupier，ontheparishbooksofthetimewhenherentedtheHouse，andtherewasthereforenoneedofanycluetohisname。But，hehimselfwaslesseasytobefound;for，hehadledawanderinglife，andsettledpeoplehadlostsightofhim，andpeoplewhoplumedthemselvesonbeingrespectablewereshyofadmittingthattheyhadeverknownanythingofhim。Atlast，amongthemarshlandsneartheriver’slevel，thatlieaboutDeptfordandtheneighbouringmarket—gardens，aGrizzledPersonageinvelveteen，withafacesocutupbyvarietiesofweatherthathelookedasifhehadbeentattooed，wasfoundsmokingapipeatthedoorofawoodenhouseonwheels。Thewoodenhousewaslaidupinordinaryforthewinter，nearthemouthofamuddycreek;andeverythingnearit，thefoggyriver，themistymarshes，andthesteamingmarket—gardens，smokedincompanywiththegrizzledman。Inthemidstofthissmokingparty，thefunnel—chimneyofthewoodenhouseonwheelswasnotremiss，buttookitspipewiththerestinacompanionablemanner。
　　OnbeingaskedifitwerehewhohadoncerentedtheHousetoLet，GrizzledVelveteenlookedsurprised，andsaidyes。ThenhisnamewasMagsman？Thatwasit，TobyMagsman——whichlawfullychristenedRobert;butcalledintheline，fromainfant，Toby。TherewasnothingaginTobyMagsman，hebelieved？Iftherewassuspicionofsuch——mentionit！
　　Therewasnosuspicionofsuch，hemightrestassured。But，someinquiriesweremakingaboutthatHouse，andwouldheobjecttosaywhyheleftit？
　　Notatall;whyshouldhe？Heleftit，alongofaDwarf。
　　AlongofaDwarf？
　　Mr。Magsmanrepeated，deliberatelyandemphatically，AlongofaDwarf。
　　MightitbecompatiblewithMr。Magsman’sinclinationandconveniencetoenter，asafavour，intoafewparticulars？
　　Mr。Magsmanenteredintothefollowingparticulars。
　　Itwasalongtimeago，tobeginwith;——aforelotteriesandadealmorewasdoneawaywith。Mr。Magsmanwaslookingaboutforagoodpitch，andheseethathouse，andhesaystohimself，"I’llhaveyou，ifyou’retobehad。Ifmoney’llgetyou，I’llhaveyou。"
　　Theneighbourscutuprough，andmadecomplaints;butMr。Magsmandon’tknowwhattheyWOULDhavehad。Itwasalovelything。Firstofall，therewasthecanvass，representinthepicteroftheGiant，inSpanishtrunksandaruff，whowashimselfhalftheheighthofthehouse，andwasrunupwithalineandpulleytoapoleontheroof，sothathisEdwascoevalwiththeparapet。Then，therewasthecanvass，representinthepicteroftheAlbinalady，showingherwhiteairtotheArmyandNavyincorrectuniform。Then，therewasthecanvass，representinthepicteroftheWildIndianascalpinamemberofsomeforeignnation。Then，therewasthecanvass，representinthepicterofachildofaBritishPlanter，seizedbytwoBoaConstrictors——notthatWEneverhadnochild，nornoConstrictorsneither。Similarly，therewasthecanvass，representinthepicteroftheWildAssofthePrairies——notthatWEneverhadnowildasses，norwouldn’thavehad’ematagift。Last，therewasthecanvass，representinthepicteroftheDwarf，andlikehimtoo（considerin），withGeorgetheFourthinsuchastateofastonishmentathimasHisMajestycouldn’twithhisutmostpolitenessandstoutnessexpress。ThefrontoftheHousewassocoveredwithcanvasses，thattherewasn’tasparkofdaylightevervisibleonthatside。"MAGSMAN’SAMUSEMENTS，"fifteenfootlongbytwofoothigh，ranoverthefrontdoorandparlourwinders。ThepassagewasaArbourofgreenbaizeandgardenstuff。Abarrel—organperformedthereunceasing。Andastorespectability，——ifthreepenceain’trespectable，whatis？
　　But，theDwarfistheprincipalarticleatpresent，andhewasworththemoney。HewaswroteupasMAJORTPSCHOFFKI，OFTHEIMPERIAL
　　BULGRADERIANBRIGADE。Nobodycouldn’tpronouncethename，anditneverwasintendedanybodyshould。Thepublicalwaysturnedit，asaregularrule，intoChopski。InthelinehewascalledChops;
　　partlyonthataccount，andpartlybecausehisrealname，ifheeverhadanyrealname（whichwasverydubious），wasStakes。
　　Hewasaun—commonsmallman，hereallywas。Certainlynotsosmallashewasmadeouttobe，butwhereISyourDwarfasis？Hewasamostuncommonsmallman，withamostuncommonlargeEd;andwhathehadinsidethatEd，nobodyeverknowedbuthimself:evensupposinhimselftohaveevertookstockofit，whichitwouldhavebeenastiffjobforevenhimtodo。
　　Thekindestlittlemanasnevergrowed！Spirited，butnotproud。
　　WhenhetravelledwiththeSpottedBaby——thoughheknowedhimselftobeanat’ralDwarf，andknowedtheBaby’sspotstobeputuponhimartificial，henursedthatBabylikeamother。Youneverheerdhimgiveaill—nametoaGiant。HeDIDallowhimselftobreakoutintostronglanguagerespectintheFatLadyfromNorfolk;butthatwasanaffairofthe’art;andwhenaman’s’arthasbeentrifledwithbyalady，andthepreferencegivtoaIndian，heain’tmasterofhisactions。
　　Hewasalwaysinlove，ofcourse;everyhumannat’ralphenomenonis。
　　Andhewasalwaysinlovewithalargewoman;IneverknowedtheDwarfascouldbegottoloveasmallone。Whichhelpstokeep’emtheCuriositiestheyare。
　　Onesing’lerideahehadinthatEdofhis，whichmusthavemeantsomething，oritwouldn’thavebeenthere。Itwasalwayshisopinionthathewasentitledtoproperty。Heneverwouldputhisnametoanything。Hehadbeentaughttowrite，bytheyoungmanwithoutarms，whogothislivingwithhistoes（quiteawritingmasterHEwas，andtaughtscoresintheline），butChopswouldhavestarvedtodeath，aforehe’dhavegainedabitofbreadbyputtinghishandtoapaper。Thisisthemorecurioustobearinmind，becauseHEhadnoproperty，norhopeofproperty，excepthishouseandasarser。WhenIsayhishouse，Imeanthebox，paintedandgotupoutsidelikeareg’larsix—roomer，thatheusedtocreepinto，withadiamondring（orquiteasgoodtolookat）onhisforefinger，andringalittlebelloutofwhatthePublicbelievedtobetheDrawing—roomwinder。AndwhenIsayasarser，ImeanaChaneysarserinwhichhemadeacollectionforhimselfattheendofeveryEntertainment。Hiscueforthat，hetookfromme:"Ladiesandgentlemen，thelittlemanwillnowwalkthreetimesroundtheCairawan，andretirebehindthecurtain。"Whenhesaidanythingimportant，inprivatelife，hemostlywounditupwiththisformofwords，andtheywasgenerallythelastthinghesaidtomeatnightaforehewenttobed。
　　HehadwhatIconsiderafinemind——apoeticmind。Hisideasrespectinhispropertynevercomeuponhimsostrongaswhenhesatuponabarrel—organandhadthehandleturned。Arterthewibrationhadrunthroughhimalittletime，hewouldscreechout，"Toby，I
　　feelmypropertycoming——grindaway！I’mcountingmyguineasbythousands，Toby——grindaway！Toby，Ishallbeamanoffortun！I
　　feeltheMintajinglinginme，Toby，andI’mswellingoutintotheBankofEngland！"Suchistheinfluenceofmusiconapoeticmind。
　　Notthathewaspartialtoanyothermusicbutabarrel—organ;onthecontrary，hatedit。
　　HehadakindofaeverlastinggrudgeaginthePublic:whichisathingyoumaynoticeinmanyphenomenonsthatgettheirlivingoutofit。Whatriledhimmostinthenaterofhisoccupationwas，thatitkephimoutofSociety。Hewascontiniwallysaying，"Toby，myambitionis，togointoSociety。ThecurseofmypositiontowardsthePublicis，thatitkeepsmehoutofSociety。Thisdon’tsignifytoalowbeastofaIndian;hean’tformedforSociety。Thisdon’tsignifytoaSpottedBaby;HEan’tformedforSociety。——Iam。"
　　NobodynevercouldmakeoutwhatChopsdonewithhismoney。Hehadagoodsalary，downonthedrumeverySaturdayasthedaycameround，besideshavingtherunofhisteeth——andhewasaWoodpeckertoeat——butallDwarfsare。Thesarserwasalittleincome，bringinghiminsomanyhalfpencethathe’dcarry’emforaweektogether，tiedupinapocket—handkercher。Andyetheneverhadmoney。Anditcouldn’tbetheFatLadyfromNorfolk，aswasoncesupposed;becauseitstandstoreasonthatwhenyouhaveaanimositytowardsaIndian，whichmakesyougrindyourteethathimtohisface，andwhichcanhardlyholdyoufromGoosinghimaudiblewhenhe’sgoingthroughhisWar—Dance——itstandstoreasonyouwouldn’tunderthemcircumstancesdepriveyourself，tosupportthatIndianinthelapofluxury。
　　Mostunexpected，themysterycomeoutonedayatEghamRaces。ThePublicwasshyofbeinpulledin，andChopswasringinhislittlebelloutofhisdrawing—roomwinder，andwassnarlintomeoverhisshoulderashekneeleddownwithhislegsoutattheback—door——forhecouldn’tbeshovedintohishousewithoutkneelingdown，andthepremiseswouldn’taccommodatehislegs——wassnarlin，"Here’sapreciousPublicforyou;whytheDevildon’ttheytumbleup？"whenamaninthecrowdholdsupacarrier—pigeon，andcriesout，"Ifthere’sanypersonhereashasgotaticket，theLottery’sjustdrawed，andthenumberashascomeupforthegreatprizeisthree，seven，forty—two！Three，seven，forty—two！"IwasgivinthemantotheFuriesmyself，forcallingoffthePublic’sattention——forthePublicwillturnaway，atanytime，tolookatanythinginpreferencetothethingshowed’em;andifyoudoubtit，get’emtogetherforanyindiwidualpurposeonthefaceoftheearth，andsendonlytwopeopleinlate，andseeifthewholecompanyan’tfarmoreinterestedintakinparticularnoticeofthemtwothanofyou——
　　Isay，Iwasn’tbestpleasedwiththemanforcallinout，andwasn’tblessinhiminmyownmind，whenIseeChops’slittlebellflyoutofwinderataoldlady，andhegetsupandkickshisboxover，exposinthewholesecret，andhecatchesholdofthecalvesofmylegsandhesaystome，"Carrymeintothewan，Toby，andthrowapailofwaterovermeorI’madeadman，forI’vecomeintomyproperty！"
　　Twelvethousandoddhundredpound，wasChops’swinnins。Hehadboughtahalf—ticketforthetwenty—fivethousandprize，andithadcomeup。Thefirstusehemadeofhisproperty，was，tooffertofighttheWildIndianforfivehundredpoundaside，himwithapoisoneddarnin—needleandtheIndianwithaclub;buttheIndianbeinginwantofbackerstothatamount，itwentnofurther。
　　Arterhehadbeenmadforaweek——inastateofmind，inshort，inwhich，ifIhadlethimsitontheorganforonlytwominutes，I
　　believehewouldhavebust——butwekeptheorganfromhim——Mr。Chopscomeround，andbehavedliberalandbeautifultoall。Hethensentforayoungmanheknowed，ashadawerygenteelappearanceandwasaBonnetatagaming—booth（mostrespectablebroughtup，fatherhavinbeenimminentintheliverystablelinebutunfort’nateinacommercialcrisis，throughpaintinaoldgray，ginger—bay，andsellinhimwithaPedigree），andMr。ChopssaidtothisBonnet，whosaidhisnamewasNormandy，whichitwasn’t:
　　"Normandy，I’magoinintoSociety。Willyougowithme？"
　　SaysNormandy:"DoIunderstandyou，Mr。Chops，tohintimatethatthe’oleoftheexpensesofthatmovewillbebornebyyourself？"
　　"Correct，"saysMr。Chops。"AndyoushallhaveaPrincelyallowancetoo。"
　　TheBonnetliftedMr。Chopsuponachair，toshakehandswithhim，andrepliedinpoetry，withhiseyesseeminglyfulloftears:
　　"Myboatisontheshore，Andmybarkisonthesea，AndIdonotaskformore，ButI’llGo:—alongwiththee。"
　　TheywentintoSociety，inachayandfourgrayswithsilkjackets。
　　TheytooklodgingsinPallMall，London，andtheyblazedaway。
　　InconsequenceofanotethatwasbroughttoBartlemyFairintheautumnofnextyearbyaservant，mostwonderfulgotupinmilk—
　　whitecordsandtops，IcleanedmyselfandwenttoPallMall，oneeveningappinted。Thegentlemenwasattheirwinearterdinner，andMr。Chops’seyeswasmorefixedinthatEdofhisthanIthoughtgoodforhim。Therewasthreeof’em（incompany，Imean），andI
　　knowedthethirdwell。Whenlastmet，hehadonawhiteRomanshirt，andabishop’smitrecoveredwithleopard—skin，andplayedtheclarionetallwrong，inabandataWildBeastShow。
　　Thisgenttookonnottoknowme，andMr。Chopssaid:"Gentlemen，thisisaoldfriendofformerdays:"andNormandylookedatmethroughaeye—glass，andsaid，"Magsman，gladtoseeyou！"——whichI’lltakemyoathhewasn’t。Mr。Chops，togithimconvenienttothetable，hadhischaironathrone（muchoftheformofGeorgetheFourth’sinthecanvass），buthehardlyappearedtometobeKingthereinanyotherpintofview，forhistwogentlemenorderedaboutlikeEmperors。TheywasalldressedlikeMay—Day——gorgeous！——AndastoWine，theyswaminallsorts。
　　Imadetheroundofthebottles，firstseparate（tosayIhaddoneit），andthenmixed’emalltogether（tosayIhaddoneit），andthentriedtwoof’emashalf—and—half，andthent’othertwo。
　　Altogether，Ipassedapleasinevenin，butwithatendencytofeelmuddled，untilIconsidereditgoodmannerstogetupandsay，"Mr。
　　Chops，thebestoffriendsmustpart，Ithankyouforthewarietyofforeigndrainsyouhavestoodso’ansome，Ilookstowardsyouinredwine，andItakesmyleave。"Mr。Chopsreplied，"Ifyou’lljusthitchmeoutofthisoveryourrightarm，Magsman，andcarrymedown—stairs，I’llseeyouout。"IsaidIcouldn’tthinkofsuchathing，buthewouldhaveit，soIliftedhimoffhisthrone。HesmeltstrongofMaideary，andIcouldn’thelpthinkingasIcarriedhimdownthatitwaslikecarryingalargebottlefullofwine，witharaytheruglystopper，agooddealoutofproportion。
　　WhenIsethimonthedoor—matinthehall，hekepmeclosetohimbyholdingontomycoat—collar，andhewhispers:
　　"Iain’t’appy，Magsman。"