'WhenyouwerewithHewby,ofcourse,ofcourse。Well,Ican'tunderstandit。'Histonesrose。'Idon'tknowwhattosay,yourhoodwinkingmelikethisforsolong!'
'Idon'tseethatIhavehoodwinkedyouatall。'
'Yes,yes,but'——
Knightarosefromhisseat,andbeganpacingupanddowntheroom。
Hisfacewasmarkedlypale,andhisvoiceperturbed,ashesaid——
'YoudidnotactasIshouldhaveactedtowardsyouunderthosecircumstances。Ifeelitdeeply;andItellyouplainly,Ishallneverforgetit!'
'What?'
'Yourbehaviouratthatmeetinginthefamilyvault,whenItoldyouweweregoingtobemarried。Deception,dishonesty,everywhere;alltheworld'sofapiece!'
Stephendidnotmuchlikethismisconstructionofhismotives,eventhoughitwasbutthehastyconclusionofafrienddisturbedbyemotion。
'IcoulddonootherwisethanIdid,withdueregardtoher,'hesaidstiffly。
'Indeed!'saidKnight,inthebitteresttoneofreproach。'Norcouldyouwithdueregardtoherhavemarriedher,Isuppose!I
havehoped——longed——thatHE,whoturnsouttobeYOU,wouldultimatelyhavedonethat。'
'Iammuchobligedtoyouforthathope。Butyoutalkverymysteriously。IthinkIhadaboutthebestreasonanybodycouldhavehadfornotdoingthat。'
'Oh,whatreasonwasit?'
'ThatIcouldnot。'
'Yououghttohavemadeanopportunity;yououghttodosonow,inbarejusticetoher,Stephen!'criedKnight,carriedbeyondhimself。'Thatyouknowverywell,andithurtsandwoundsmemorethanyoudreamtofindyouneverhavetriedtomakeanyreparationtoawomanofthatkind——sotrusting,soapttoberunawaywithbyherfeelings——poorlittlefool,somuchtheworseforher!'
'Why,youtalklikeamadman!Youtookherawayfromme,didyounot?'
'Pickingupwhatanotherthrowsdowncanscarcelybecalled"takingaway。”However,weshallnotagreetoowelluponthatsubject,sowehadbetterpart。'
'ButIamquitecertainyoumisapprehendsomethingmostgrievously,'saidStephen,shakentothebottomofhisheart。
'WhathaveIdone;tellme?IhavelostElfride,butisthatsuchasin?'
'Wasitherdoing,oryours?'
'Waswhat?'
'Thatyouparted。'
'Iwilltellyouhonestly。Itwashersentirely,entirely。'
'Whatwasherreason?'
'Icanhardlysay。ButI'lltellthestorywithoutreserve。'
Stephenuntilto-dayhadunhesitatinglyheldthatshegrewtiredofhimandturnedtoKnight;buthedidnotliketoadvancethestatementnow,oreventothinkthethought。TofancyotherwiseaccordedbetterwiththehopetowhichKnight'sestrangementhadgivenbirth:thatloveforhisfriendwasnotthedirectcause,butaresultofhersuspensionofloveforhimself。
'Suchamattermustnotbeallowedtobreeddiscordbetweenus,'
Knightreturned,relapsingintoamannerwhichconcealedallhistruefeeling,asifconfidencenowwasintolerable。'Idoseethatyourreticencetowardsmeinthevaultmayhavebeendictatedbyprudentialconsiderations。'Heconcludedartificially,'Itwasastrangethingaltogether;butnotofmuchimportance,Isuppose,atthisdistanceoftime;anditdoesnotconcernmenow,thoughI
don'tmindhearingyourstory。'
ThesewordsfromKnight,utteredwithsuchanairofrenunciationandapparentindifference,promptedSmithtospeakon——perhapswithalittlecomplacency——ofhisoldsecretengagementtoElfride。Hetoldthedetailsofitsorigin,andtheperemptorywordsandactionsofherfathertoextinguishtheirlove。
Knightperseveredinthetoneandmannerofadisinterestedoutsider。IthadbecomemorethaneverimperativetoscreenhisemotionsfromStephen'seye;theyoungmanwouldotherwisebelessfrank,andtheirmeetingwouldbeagainembittered。Whatwastheuseofuntowardcandour?
Stephenhadnowarrivedatthepointinhisingenuousnarrativewhereheleftthevicaragebecauseofherfather'smanner。
Knight'sinterestincreased。Theirloveseemedsoinnocentandchildlikethusfar。
'Itisanicepointincasuistry,'heobserved,'todecidewhetheryouwereculpableornotinnottellingSwancourtthatyourfriendswereparishionersofhis。Itwasonlyhumannaturetoholdyourtongueunderthecircumstances。Well,whatwastheresultofyourdismissalbyhim?'
'Thatweagreedtobesecretlyfaithful。Andtoinsurethiswethoughtwewouldmarry。'
Knight'ssuspenseandagitationrosehigherwhenStephenentereduponthisphaseofthesubject。
'Doyoumindtellingon?'hesaid,steadyinghismannerofspeech。
'Oh,notatall。'
ThenStephengaveinfulltheparticularsofthemeetingwithElfrideattherailwaystation;thenecessitytheywereunderofgoingtoLondon,unlesstheceremonyweretobepostponed。Thelongjourneyoftheafternoonandevening;hertimidityandrevulsionoffeeling;itsculminationonreachingLondon;thecrossingovertothedown-platformandtheirimmediatedepartureagain,solelyinobediencetoherwish;thejourneyallnight;
theiranxiouswatchingforthedawn;theirarrivalatSt。Launce'satlast——weredetailed。AndhetoldhowavillagewomannamedJethwaywastheonlypersonwhorecognizedthem,eithergoingorcoming;andhowdreadfullythisterrifiedElfride。Hetoldhowhewaitedinthefieldswhilstthisthenreproachfulsweetheartwentforherpony,andhowthelastkissheevergaveherwasgivenamileoutofthetown,onthewaytoEndelstow。
ThesethingsStephenrelatedwithawill。HebelievedthatindoingsoheestablishedwordbywordthereasonablenessofhisclaimtoElfride。
'Curseher!cursethatwoman!——thatmiserableletterthatpartedus!OGod!'
Knightbeganpacingtheroomagain,andutteredthisatfurtherend。
'Whatdidyousay?'saidStephen,turninground。
'Say?DidIsayanything?Oh,Iwasmerelythinkingaboutyourstory,andtheoddnessofmyhavingafancyforthesamewomanafterwards。AndthatnowI——Ihaveforgottenheralmost;andneitherofuscareabouther,exceptjustasafriend,youknow,eh?'
Knightstillcontinuedatthefurtherendoftheroom,somewhatinshadow。
'Exactly,'saidStephen,inwardlyexultant,forhewasreallydeceivedbyKnight'soff-handmanner。
YethewasdeceivedlessbythecompletenessofKnight'sdisguisethanbythepersuasivepowerwhichlayinthefactthatKnighthadneverbeforedeceivedhiminanything。SothissuppositionthathiscompanionhadceasedtoloveElfridewasanenormouslighteningoftheweightwhichhadturnedthescaleagainsthim。
'AdmittingthatElfrideCOULDloveanothermanafteryou,'saidtheelder,underthesamevarnishofcarelesscriticism,'shewasnonetheworseforthatexperience。'
'Theworse?Ofcourseshewasnonetheworse。'
'Didyoueverthinkitawildandthoughtlessthingforhertodo?'
'Indeed,Ineverdid,'saidStephen。'Ipersuadedher。Shesawnoharminituntilshedecidedtoreturn,nordidI;norwasthere,excepttotheextentofindiscretion。'
'Directlyshethoughtitwaswrongshewouldgonofurther?'
'Thatwasit。Ihadjustbeguntothinkitwrongtoo。'
'Suchachildishescapademighthavebeenmisrepresentedbyanyevil-disposedperson,mightitnot?'
'Itmight;butIneverheardthatitwas。Nobodywhoreallyknewallthecircumstanceswouldhavedoneotherwisethansmile。Ifalltheworldhadknownit,Elfridewouldstillhaveremainedtheonlyonewhothoughtheractionasin。Poorchild,shealwayspersistedinthinkingso,andwasfrightenedmorethanenough。'
'Stephen,doyoulovehernow?'
'Well,Ilikeher;Ialwaysshall,youknow,'hesaidevasively,andwithallthestrategylovesuggested。'ButIhavenotseenherforsolongthatIcanhardlybeexpectedtoloveher。Doyouloveherstill?'
'HowshallIanswerwithoutbeingashamed?Whatficklebeingswemenare,Stephen!Menmaylovestrongestforawhile,butwomenlovelongest。Iusedtoloveher——inmyway,youknow。'
'Yes,Iunderstand。Ah,andIusedtoloveherinmyway。Infact,Ilovedheragooddealatonetime;buttravelhasatendencytoobliterateearlyfancies。'
'Ithas——ithas,truly。'
Perhapsthemostextraordinaryfeatureinthisconversationwasthecircumstancethat,thougheachinterlocutorhadatfirsthissuspicionsoftheother'sabidingpassionawakenedbyseverallittleacts,neitherwouldallowhimselftoseethathisfriendmightnowbespeakingdeceitfullyaswellashe。
'Stephen。'resumedKnight,'nowthatmattersaresmoothbetweenus,IthinkImustleaveyou。Youwon'tmindmyhurryingofftomyquarters?'
'You'llstaytosomesortofsuppersurely?didn'tyoucometodinner!'
'Youmustreallyexcusemethisonce。'
'Thenyou'lldropintobreakfastto-morrow。'
'Ishallberatherpressedfortime。'
'Anearlybreakfast,whichshallinterferewithnothing?'
'I'llcome,'saidKnight,withasmuchreadinessasitwaspossibletograftuponahugestockofreluctance。'Yes,early;
eighto'clocksay,asweareunderthesameroof。'
'Anytimeyoulike。Eightitshallbe。'
AndKnightlefthim。Towearamask,todissemblehisfeelingsashehadintheirlatemiserableconversation,wassuchtorturethathecouldsupportitnolonger。ItwasthefirsttimeinKnight'slifethathehadeverbeensoentirelytheplayerofapart。AndthemanhehadthusdeceivedwasStephen,whohaddocilelylookeduptohimfromyouthasasuperiorofunblemishedintegrity。
Hewenttobed,andallowedthefeverofhisexcitementtorageuncontrolled。Stephen——itwasonlyhewhowastherival——onlyStephen!Therewasananti-climaxofabsurditywhichKnight,wretchedandconscience-strickenashewas,couldnothelprecognizing。Stephenwasbutaboytohim。WherethegreatgrieflaywasinperceivingthattheveryinnocenceofElfrideinreadingherlittlefaultasonesogravewaswhathadfatallymisledhim。HadElfride,withanydegreeofcoolness,assertedthatshehaddonenoharm,thepoisonousbreathofthedeadMrs。
Jethwaywouldhavebeeninoperative。Whydidhenotmakehislittledocilegirltellmore?Ifonthatsubjecthehadonlyexercisedtheimperativenesscustomarywithhimonothers,allmighthavebeenrevealed。Itsmotehisheartlikeaswitchwhenherememberedhowgentlyshehadbornehisscourgingspeeches,neveransweringhimwithasinglereproach,onlyassuringhimofherunboundedlove。
KnightblessedElfrideforhersweetness,andforgotherfault。
Hepicturedwithavividfancythosefairsummersceneswithher。
Heagainsawherasattheirfirstmeeting,timidatspeaking,yetinhereagernesstobeexplanatoryborneforwardalmostagainstherwill。Howshewouldwaitforhimingreenplaces,withoutshowinganyoftheordinarywomanlyaffectationsofindifference!
Howproudshewastobeseenwalkingwithhim,bearinglegiblyinhereyesthethoughtthathewasthegreatestgeniusintheworld!
Heformedaresolution;andafterthatcouldmakepretenceofslumbernolonger。Risinganddressinghimself,hesatdownandwaitedforday。
ThatnightStephenwasrestlesstoo。NotbecauseoftheunwontednessofareturntoEnglishscenery;notbecausehewasabouttomeethisparents,andsettledownforawhiletoEnglishcottagelife。Hewasindulgingindreams,andforthenoncethewarehousesofBombayandtheplainsandfortsofPoonahwerebutashadow'sshadow。Hisdreamwasbasedonthisoneatomoffact:
ElfrideandKnighthadbecomeseparated,andtheirengagementwasasifithadneverbeen。TheirrupturemusthaveoccurredsoonafterStephen'sdiscoveryofthefactoftheirunion;and,Stephenwentontothink,whatsoprobableasthatareturnofhererrantaffectiontohimselfwasthecause?
Stephen'sopinionsinthismatterwerethoseofalover,andnotthebalancedjudgmentofanunbiassedspectator。Hisnaturallysanguinespiritbuilthopeuponhope,tillscarcelyadoubtremainedinhismindthatherlingeringtendernessforhimhadinsomewaybeenperceivedbyKnight,andhadprovokedtheirparting。
TogoandseeElfridewasthesuggestionofimpulsesitwasimpossibletowithstand。Atanyrate,torundownfromSt。
Launce'stoCastlePoterel,adistanceoflessthantwentymiles,andglidelikeaghostabouttheiroldhaunts,makingstealthyinquiriesabouther,wouldbeafascinatingwayofpassingthefirstsparehoursafterreachinghomeonthedayafterthemorrow。
Hewasnowarichermanthanheretofore,standingonhisownbottom;andthedefinitepositioninwhichhehadrootedhimselfnullifiedoldlocaldistinctions。Hehadbecomeillustrious,evensanguineclarus,judgingfromthetoneoftheworthyMayorofSt。
Launce's。
ChapterXXXIX
'Eachtothelovedone'sside。'
Thefriendsandrivalsbreakfastedtogetherthenextmorning。Notawordwassaidoneithersideuponthematterdiscussedthepreviouseveningsogliblyandsohollowly。Stephenwasabsorbedthegreaterpartofthetimeinwishinghewerenotforcedtostayintownyetanotherday。
'Idon'tintendtoleaveforSt。Launce'stillto-morrow,asyouknow,'hesaidtoKnightattheendofthemeal。'Whatareyougoingtodowithyourselfto-day?'
'Ihaveanengagementjustbeforeten,'saidKnightdeliberately;
'andafterthattimeImustcallupontwoorthreepeople。'
'I'lllookforyouthisevening,'saidStephen。
'Yes,do。Youmayaswellcomeanddinewithme;thatis,ifwecanmeet。ImaynotsleepinLondonto-night;infact,Iamabsolutelyunsettledastomymovementsyet。However,thefirstthingIamgoingtodoistogetmybaggageshiftedfromthisplacetoBede'sInn。Good-byeforthepresent。I'llwrite,youknow,ifIcan'tmeetyou。'
Itnowwantedaquartertonineo'clock。WhenKnightwasgone,Stephenfeltyetmoreimpatientofthecircumstancethatanotherdaywouldhavetodragitselfawaywearilybeforehecouldsetoutforthatspotofearthwhereonasoftthoughtofhimmightperhapsbenourishedstill。Onasuddenheadmittedtohismindthepossibilitythattheengagementhewaswaitingintowntokeepmightbepostponedwithoutmuchharm。
Itwasnosoonerperceivedthanattempted。Lookingathiswatch,hefounditwantedfortyminutestothedepartureoftheteno'clocktrainfromPaddington,whichlefthimasurplusquarterofanhourbeforeitwouldbenecessarytostartforthestation。
Scribblingahastynoteortwo——oneputtingoffthebusinessmeeting,anothertoKnightapologizingfornotbeingabletoseehimintheevening——payinghisbill,andleavinghisheavierluggagetofollowhimbygoods-train,hejumpedintoacabandrattledofftotheGreatWesternStation。
Shortlyafterwardshetookhisseatintherailwaycarriage。
Theguardpausedonhiswhistle,toletintothenextcompartmenttoSmith'samanofwhomStephenhadcaughtbutahastyglimpseasheranacrosstheplatformatthelastmoment。
Smithsankbackintothecarriage,stilledbyperplexity。ThemanwaslikeKnight——astonishinglylikehim。Wasitpossibleitcouldbehe?TohavegottherehemusthavedrivenlikethewindtoBede'sInn,andhardlyhavealightedbeforestartingagain。No,itcouldnotbehe;thatwasnothiswayofdoingthings。
DuringtheearlypartofthejourneyStephenSmith'sthoughtsbusiedthemselvestillhisbrainseemedswollen。Onesubjectwasconcerninghisownapproachingactions。Hewasadayearlierthanhislettertohisparentshadstated,andhisarrangementwiththemhadbeenthattheyshouldmeethimatPlymouth;aplanwhichpleasedtheworthycouplebeyondexpression。Oncebeforethesameengagementhadbeenmade,whichhehadthenquashedbyante-datinghisarrival。ThistimehewouldgorightontoCastleBoterel;
rambleinthatwell-knownneighbourhoodduringtheeveningandnextmorning,makinginquiries;andreturntoPlymouthtomeetthemasarranged——acontrivancewhichwouldleavetheircherishedprojectundisturbed,relievinghisownimpatiencealso。
AtChippenhamtherewasalittlewaiting,andsomelooseningandattachingofcarriages。
Stephenlookedout。Atthesamemomentanotherman'sheademergedfromtheadjoiningwindow。Eachlookedintheother'sface。
KnightandStephenconfrontedoneanother。
'Youhere!'saidtheyoungerman。
'Yes。Itseemsthatyouaretoo,'saidKnight,strangely。
'Yes。'
Theselfishnessofloveandthecrueltyofjealousywerefairlyexemplifiedatthismoment。Eachofthetwomenlookedathisfriendashehadneverlookedathimbefore。EachwasTROUBLEDattheother'spresence。
'Ithoughtyousaidyouwerenotcomingtillto-morrow,'remarkedKnight。
'Idid。Itwasanafterthoughttocometo-day。Thisjourneywasyourengagement,then?'
'No,itwasnot。Thisisanafterthoughtofminetoo。Ileftanotetoexplainit,andaccountformynotbeingabletomeetyouthiseveningaswearranged。'
'SodidIforyou。'
'Youdon'tlookwell:youdidnotthismorning。'
'Ihaveaheadache。Youarepalerto-daythanyouwere。'
'I,too,havebeensufferingfromheadache。Wehavetowaithereafewminutes,Ithink。'
Theywalkedupanddowntheplatform,eachonemoreandmoreembarrassinglyconcernedwiththeawkwardnessofhisfriend'spresence。Theyreachedtheendofthefootway,andpausedinsheerabsent-mindedness。Stephen'svacanteyesrestedupontheoperationsofsomeporters,whowereshiftingadarkandcurious-
lookingvanfromtherearofthetrain,toshuntanotherwhichwasbetweenitandtheforepartofthetrain。Thisoperationhavingbeenconcluded,thetwofriendsreturnedtothesideoftheircarriage。
'Willyoucomeinhere?'saidKnight,notverywarmly。
'Ihavemyrugandportmanteauandumbrellawithme:itisratherbotheringtomovenow,'saidStephenreluctantly。'Whynotyoucomehere?'
'Ihavemytrapstoo。Itishardlyworthwhiletoshiftthem,forIshallseeyouagain,youknow。'
'Oh,yes。'
Andeachgotintohisownplace。Justatstarting,amanontheplatformhelduphishandsandstoppedthetrain。
Stephenlookedouttoseewhatwasthematter。
Oneoftheofficialswasexclaimingtoanother,'Thatcarriageshouldhavebeenattachedagain。Can'tyouseeitisforthemainline?Quick!Whatfoolsthereareintheworld!'
'Whataconfoundednuisancethesestoppagesare!'exclaimedKnightimpatiently,lookingoutfromhiscompartment。'Whatisit?'
'Thatsingularcarriagewesawhasbeenunfastenedfromourtrainbymistake,itseems,'saidStephen。
Hewaswatchingtheprocessofattachingit。Thevanorcarriage,whichhenowrecognizedashavingseenatPaddingtonbeforetheystarted,wasrichandsolemnratherthangloomyinaspect。Itseemedtobequitenew,andofmoderndesign,anditsimpressivepersonalityattractedthenoticeofothersbesidehimself。Hebehelditgraduallywheeledforwardbytwomenoneachside:
slowerandmoresadlyitseemedtoapproach:thenaslightconcussion,andtheywereconnectedwithit,andoffagain。
StephensatalltheafternoonponderinguponthereasonofKnight'sunexpectedreappearance。WashegoingasfarasCastleBoterel?Ifso,hecouldonlyhaveoneobjectinview——avisittoElfride。Andwhatanideaitseemed!
AtPlymouthSmithpartookofalittlerefreshment,andthenwentroundtothesidefromwhichthetrainstartedforCamelton,thenewstationnearCastleBoterelandEndelstow。
Knightwasalreadythere。
Stephenwalkedupandstoodbesidehimwithoutspeaking。Twomenatthismomentcreptoutfromamongthewheelsofthewaitingtrain。
'Thecarriageislightenough,'saidoneinagrimtone。'Lightasvanity;fullofnothing。'
'Nothinginsize,butagooddealinsignification,'saidtheother,amanofbrightermindandmanners。
SmiththenperceivedthattotheirtrainwasattachedthatsamecarriageofgrandanddarkaspectwhichhadhauntedthemallthewayfromLondon。
'Youaregoingon,Isuppose?'saidKnight,turningtoStephen,afteridlylookingatthesameobject。
'Yes。'
'Wemayaswelltraveltogetherfortheremainingdistance,maywenot?'
'Certainlywewill;'andtheybothenteredthesamedoor。
Eveningdrewonapace。ItchancedtobetheeveofSt。
Valentine's——thatbishopofblessedmemorytoyouthfullovers——andthesunshonelowundertherimofathickhardcloud,decoratingtheeminencesofthelandscapewithcrownsoforangefire。Asthetrainchangeditsdirectiononacurve,thesameraysstretchedinthroughthewindow,andcoaxedopenKnight'shalf-closedeyes。
'YouwillgetoutatSt。Launce's,Isuppose?'hemurmured。
'No,'saidStephen,'Iamnotexpectedtillto-morrow。'Knightwassilent。
'Andyou——areyougoingtoEndelstow?'saidtheyoungermanpointedly。
'Sinceyouask,IcandonolessthansayIam,Stephen,'
continuedKnightslowly,andwithmoreresolutionofmannerthanhehadshownalltheday。'IamgoingtoEndelstowtoseeifElfrideSwancourtisstillfree;andifso,toaskhertobemywife。'
'SoamI,'saidStephenSmith。
'Ithinkyou'llloseyourlabour,'Knightreturnedwithdecision。
'Naturallyyoudo。'TherewasastrongaccentofbitternessinStephen'svoice。'YoumighthavesaidHOPEinsteadofTHINK,'headded。
'Imighthavedonenosuchthing。Igaveyoumyopinion。ElfrideSwancourtmayhavelovedyouonce,nodoubt,butitwaswhenshewassoyoungthatshehardlyknewherownmind。'
'Thankyou,'saidStephenlaconically。'SheknewhermindaswellasIdid。Wearethesameage。Ifyouhadn'tinterfered——'
'Don'tsaythat——don'tsayit,Stephen!HowcanyoumakeoutthatIinterfered?Bejust,please!'
'Well,'saidhisfriend,'shewasminebeforeshewasyours——youknowthat!Anditseemedahardthingtofindyouhadgother,andthatifithadnotbeenforyou,allmighthaveturnedoutwellforme。'Stephenspokewithaswellingheart,andlookedoutofthewindowtohidetheemotionthatwouldmakeitselfvisibleuponhisface。
'Itisabsurd,'saidKnightinakindertone,'foryoutolookatthematterinthatlight。WhatItellyouisforyourgood。Younaturallydonotliketorealizethetruth——thatherlikingforyouwasonlyagirl'sfirstfancy,whichhasnorootever。'
'Itisnottrue!'saidStephenpassionately。'Itwasyouputmeout。Andnowyou'llbepushinginagainbetweenus,anddeprivingmeofmychanceagain!Myright,that'swhatitis!Howungenerousofyoutocomeanewandtrytotakeherawayfromme!Whenyouhadwonher,Ididnotinterfere;andyoumight,Ithink,Mr。Knight,dobymeasIdidbyyou!'
'Don't"Mr。”me;youareaswellintheworldasIamnow。'
'Firstloveisdeepest;andthatwasmine。'
'Whotoldyouthat?'saidKnightsuperciliously。
'Ihadherfirstlove。Anditwasthroughmethatyouandsheparted。Icanguessthatwellenough。'
'Itwas。AndifIweretoexplaintoyouinwhatwaythatoperatedinpartingus,Ishouldconvinceyouthatyoudoquitewronginintrudinguponher——that,asIsaidatfirst,yourlabourwillbelost。Idon'tchoosetoexplain,becausetheparticularsarepainful。Butifyouwon'tlistentome,goon,forHeaven'ssake。Idon'tcarewhatyoudo,myboy。'
'Youhavenorighttodomineerovermeasyoudo。Justbecause,whenIwasalad,Iwasaccustomedtolookuptoyouasamaster,andyouhelpedmealittle,forwhichIwasgratefultoyouandhavelovedyou,youassumetoomuchnow,andstepinbeforeme。
Itiscruel——itisunjust——ofyoutoinjuremeso!'
Knightshowedhimselfkeenlyhurtatthis。'Stephen,thosewordsareuntrueandunworthyofanyman,andtheyareunworthyofyou。
Youknowyouwrongme。Ifyouhaveeverprofitedbyanyinstructionofmine,Iamonlytoogladtoknowit。Youknowitwasgivenungrudgingly,andthatIhaveneveroncelookeduponitasmakingyouinanywayadebtortome。'
Stephen'snaturallygentlenaturewastouched,anditwasinatroubledvoicethathesaid,'Yes,yes。Iamunjustinthat——I
ownit。'
'ThisisSt。Launce'sStation,Ithink。Areyougoingtogetout?'
Knight'smannerofreturningtothematterinhanddrewStephenagainintohimself。'No;ItoldyouIwasgoingtoEndelstow,'heresolutelyreplied。
Knight'sfeaturesbecameimpassive,andhesaidnomore。Thetraincontinuedrattlingon,andStephenleantbackinhiscornerandclosedhiseyes。Theyellowsofeveninghadturnedtobrowns,theduskyshadesthickened,andaflyingcloudofdustoccasionallystrokedthewindow——borneuponachillingbreezewhichblewfromthenorth-east。Thepreviouslygildedbutnowdrearyhillsbegantolosetheirdaylightaspectsofrotundity,andtobecomeblackdiscsvandykedagainstthesky,allnaturewearingthecloakthatsixo'clockcastsoverthelandscapeatthistimeoftheyear。
Stephenstartedupinbewildermentafteralongstillness,anditwassometimebeforeherecollectedhimself。
'Well,howreal,howreal!'heexclaimed,brushinghishandacrosshiseyes。
'Whatis?'saidKnight。
'Thatdream。Ifellasleepforafewminutes,andhavehadadream——themostvividIeverremember。'
Hewearilylookedoutintothegloom。TheywerenowdrawingneartoCamelton。Thelightingofthelampswasperceptiblethroughtheveilofevening——eachflamestartingintoexistenceatintervals,andblinkingweaklyagainstthegustsofwind。
'Whatdidyoudream?'saidKnightmoodily。
'Oh,nothingtobetold。'Twasasortofincubus。Thereisneveranythingindreams。'
'Ihardlysupposedtherewas。'
'Iknowthat。However,whatIsovividlydreamtwasthis,sinceyouwouldliketohear。ItwasthebrightestofbrightmorningsatEastEndelstowChurch,andyouandIstoodbythefont。FarawayinthechancelLordLuxellianwasstandingalone,coldandimpassive,andutterlyunlikehisusualself:butIknewitwashe。Insidethealtarrailstoodastrangeclergymanwithhisbookopen。HelookedupandsaidtoLordLuxellian,"Where'sthebride?"LordLuxelliansaid,"There'snobride。”Atthatmomentsomebodycameinatthedoor,andIknewhertobeLadyLuxellianwhodied。Heturnedandsaidtoher,"Ithoughtyouwereinthevaultbelowus;butthatcouldhaveonlybeenadreamofmine。
Comeon。”Thenshecameon。AndinbrushingbetweenusshechilledmesowithcoldthatIexclaimed,"Thelifeisgoneoutofme!"and,inthewayofdreams,Iawoke。ButhereweareatCamelton。'
Theywereslowlyenteringthestation。
'Whatareyougoingtodo?'saidKnight。'DoyoureallyintendtocallontheSwancourts?'
'Bynomeans。Iamgoingtomakeinquiriesfirst。IshallstayattheLuxellianArmsto-night。YouwillgorightontoEndelstow,Isuppose,atonce?'
'Icanhardlydothatatthistimeoftheday。Perhapsyouarenotawarethatthefamily——herfather,atanyrate——isatvariancewithmeasmuchaswithyou。
'Ididn'tknowit。'
'AndthatIcannotrushintothehouseasanoldfriendanymorethanyoucan。CertainlyIhavetheprivilegesofadistantrelationship,whatevertheymaybe。'
Knightletdownthewindow,andlookedahead。'Thereareagreatmanypeopleatthestation,'hesaid。'Theyseemalltobeonthelook-outforus。'
Whenthetrainstopped,thehalf-estrangedfriendscouldperceivebythelamplightthattheassemblageofidlersenclosedasakernelagroupofmeninblackcloaks。Asidegateintheplatformrailingwasopen,andoutsidethisstoodadarkvehicle,whichtheycouldnotatfirstcharacterize。ThenKnightsawonitsupperpartformsagainsttheskylikecedarsbynight,andknewthevehicletobeahearse。Fewpeoplewereatthecarriagedoorstomeetthepassengers——themajorityhadcongregatedatthisupperend。KnightandStephenalighted,andturnedforamomentinthesamedirection。
Thesombrevan,whichhadaccompaniedthemalldayfromLondon,nowbegantorevealthattheirdestinationwasalsoitsown。Ithadbeendrawnupexactlyoppositetheopengate。Thebystandersallfellback,formingaclearlanefromthegatewaytothevan,andthemenincloaksenteredthelatterconveyance。
'Theyarelabourers,Ifancy,'saidStephen。'Ah,itisstrange;
butIrecognizethreeofthemasEndelstowmen。Ratherremarkablethis。'
Presentlytheybegantocomeout,twoandtwo;andundertheraysofthelamptheywereseentobearbetweenthemalight-colouredcoffinofsatin-wood,brightlypolished,andwithoutanail。Theeightmentooktheburdenupontheirshoulders,andslowlycrossedwithitovertothegate。
KnightandStephenwentoutside,andcameclosetotheprocessionasitmovedoff。Acarriagebelongingtothecortegeturnedroundclosetoalamp。TheraysshoneinuponthefaceofthevicarofEndelstow,Mr。Swancourt——lookingmanyyearsolderthanwhentheyhadlastseenhim。KnightandStepheninvoluntarilydrewback。
Knightspoketoabystander。'WhathasMr。Swancourttodowiththatfuneral?'
'Heisthelady'sfather,'saidthebystander。
'Whatlady'sfather?'saidKnight,inavoicesohollowthatthemanstaredathim。
'Thefatheroftheladyinthecoffin。ShediedinLondon,youknow,andhasbeenbroughtherebythistrain。Sheistobetakenhometo-night,andburiedto-morrow。'
Knightstoodstaringblindlyatwherethehearsehadbeen;asifhesawit,orsomeone,there。Thenheturned,andbeheldthelitheformofStephenboweddownlikethatofanoldman。Hetookhisyoungfriend'sarm,andledhimawayfromthelight。
ChapterXL
'Welcome,proudlady。'
Halfanhourhaspassed。TwomiserablemenarewanderinginthedarknessupthemilesofroadfromCameltontoEndelstow。
'Hasshebrokenherheart?'saidHenryKnight。'CanitbethatI
havekilledher?Iwasbitterwithher,Stephen,andshehasdied!
AndmayGodhaveNOmercyuponme!'
'HowcanyouhavekilledhermorethanI?'
'Why,Iwentawayfromher——stoleawayalmost——anddidn'ttellherIshouldnotcomeagain;andatthatlastmeetingIdidnotkissheronce,butlethermiserablygo。Ihavebeenafool——afool!I
wishthemostabjectconfessionofitbeforecrowdsofmycountrymencouldinanywaymakeamendstomydarlingfortheintensecrueltyIhaveshownher!'
'YOURdarling!'saidStephen,withasortoflaugh。'Anymancansaythat,Isuppose;anymancan。Iknowthis,shewasMYdarlingbeforeshewasyours;andaftertoo。Ifanybodyhasarighttocallherhisown,itisI。'
'Youtalklikeamaninthedark;whichiswhatyouare。Didsheeverdoanythingforyou?Riskhername,forinstance,foryou?'
Yes,shedid,'saidStephenemphatically。
'Notentirely。Didsheeverliveforyou——proveshecouldnotlivewithoutyou——laughandweepforyou?'
'Yes。'
'Never!Didsheeverriskherlifeforyou——no!Mydarlingdidforme。'
'Thenitwasinkindnessonly。Whendidsheriskherlifeforyou?'
'Tosavemineonthecliffyonder。ThepoorchildwaswithmelookingattheapproachofthePuffinsteamboat,andIslippeddown。Webothhadanarrowescape。Iwishwehaddiedthere!'
'Ah,butwait,'Stephenpleadedwithweteyes。'Shewentonthatclifftoseemearrivehome:shehadpromisedit。Shetoldmeshewouldmonthsbefore。Andwouldshehavegonethereifshehadnotcaredformeatall?'
'YouhaveanideathatElfridediedforyou,nodoubt,'saidKnight,withamournfulsarcasmtoonervelesstosupportitself。
'Nevermind。Ifwefindthat——thatshediedyours,I'llsaynomoreever。'
'Andifwefindshediedyours,I'llsaynomore。'
'Verywell——soitshallbe。'
Thedarkcloudsintowhichthesunhadsunkhadbeguntodropraininanincreasingvolume。
'Canwewaitsomewhereheretillthisshowerisover?'saidStephendesultorily。
'Asyouwill。Butitisnotworthwhile。We'llheartheparticulars,andreturn。Don'tletpeopleknowwhoweare。Iamnotmuchnow。'
Theyhadreachedapointatwhichtheroadbranchedintotwo——justoutsidethewestvillage,oneforkofthedivergingroutespassingintothelatterplace,theotherstretchingontoEastEndelstow。
Havingcomesomeofthedistancebythefootpath,theynowfoundthatthehearsewasonlyalittleinadvanceofthem。
'IfancyithasturnedofftoEastEndelstow。Canyousee?'
'Icannot。Youmustbemistaken。'
KnightandStephenenteredthevillage。Abaroffierylightlayacrosstheroad,proceedingfromthehalf-opendoorofasmithy,inwhichbellowswereheardblowingandahammerringing。Therainhadincreased,andtheymechanicallyturnedforsheltertowardsthewarmandcosyscene。
Closeattheirheelscameanotherman,withoutover-coatorumbrella,andwithaparcelunderhisarm。
'Awetevening,'hesaidtothetwofriends,andpassedbythem。
Theystoodintheouterpenthouse,butthemanwentintothefire。
Thesmithceasedhisblowing,andbegantalkingtothemanwhohadentered。
'IhavewalkedallthewayfromCamelton,'saidthelatter。'Wasobligedtocometo-night,youknow。'
Heheldtheparcel,whichwasaflatone,towardsthefirelight,tolearniftherainhadpenetratedit。Restingitedgewiseontheforge,hesupporteditperpendicularlywithonehand,wipinghisfacewiththehandkerchiefheheldintheother。
'IsupposeyouknowwhatI'vegothere?'heobservedtothesmith。
'No,Idon't,'saidthesmith,pausingagainonhisbellows。
'Astherain'snotover,I'llshowyou,'saidthebearer。
Helaidthethinandbroadpackage,whichhadacuteanglesindifferentdirections,flatupontheanvil,andthesmithblewupthefiretogivehimmorelight。First,afteruntyingthepackage,asheetofbrownpaperwasremoved:thiswaslaidflat。
Thenheunfoldedapieceofbaize:thisalsohespreadflatonthepaper。Thethirdcoveringwasawrapperoftissuepaper,whichwasspreadoutinitsturn。Theenclosurewasrevealed,andhehelditupforthesmith'sinspection。
'Oh——Isee!'saidthesmith,kindlingwithachastenedinterest,anddrawingclose。'Pooryounglady——ah,terriblemelancholything——sosoontoo!'
KnightandStephenturnedtheirheadsandlooked。
'Andwhat'sthat?'continuedthesmith。
'That'sthecoronet——beautifullyfinished,isn'tit?Ah,thatcostsomemoney!'
''TisasfineabitofmetalworkaseverIsee——that'tis。'
'Itcamefromthesamepeopleasthecoffin,youknow,butwasnotreadysoonenoughtobesentroundtothehouseinLondonyesterday。I'vegottofixitonthisverynight。'
Thecarefully-packedarticleswereacoffin-plateandcoronet。
KnightandStephencameforward。Theundertaker'sman,onseeingthemlookfortheinscription,civillyturneditroundtowardsthem,andeachread,almostatonemoment,bytheruddylightofthecoals:
ELFRIDE,WifeofSpenserHugoLuxellian,FifteenthBaronLuxellian:
DiedFebruary10,18。
Theyreadit,andreadit,andreaditagain——StephenandKnight——
asifanimatedbyonesoul。ThenStephenputhishanduponKnight'sarm,andtheyretiredfromtheyellowglow,further,further,tillthechilldarknessenclosedthemround,andthequietskyasserteditspresenceoverheadasadimgreysheetofblankmonotony。
'Whereshallwego?'saidStephen。
'Idon'tknow。'
Alongsilenceensued……'Elfridemarried!'saidStephentheninathinwhisper,asifhefearedtolettheassertionlooseontheworld。
'False,'whisperedKnight。
'Anddead。Deniedusboth。Ihate"false"——Ihateit!'
Knightmadenoanswer。
Nothingwasheardbythemnowsavetheslowmeasurementoftimebytheirbeatingpulses,thesofttouchofthedribblingrainupontheirclothes,andthelowpurroftheblacksmith'sbellowshardby。
'ShallwefollowElfieanyfurther?'Stephensaid。
'No:letusleaveheralone。Sheisbeyondourlove,andletherbebeyondourreproach。Sincewedon'tknowhalfthereasonsthatmadeherdoasshedid,Stephen,howcanwesay,evennow,thatshewasnotpureandtrueinheart?'Knight'svoicehadnowbecomemildandgentleasachild's。Hewenton:'Canwecallherambitious?No。Circumstancehas,asusual,overpoweredherpurposes——fragileanddelicateasshe——liabletobeoverthrowninamomentbythecoarseelementsofaccident。Iknowthat'sit,——
don'tyou?'
'Itmaybe——itmustbe。Letusgoon。'
TheybegantobendtheirstepstowardsCastleBoterel,whithertheyhadsenttheirbagsfromCamelton。Theywanderedoninsilenceformanyminutes。Stephenthenpaused,andlightlyputhishandwithinKnight'sarm。
'Iwonderhowshecametodie,'hesaidinabrokenwhisper。
'Shallwereturnandlearnalittlemore?'
Theyturnedbackagain,andenteringEndelstowasecondtime,cametoadoorwhichwasstandingopen。ItwasthatofaninncalledtheWelcomeHome,andthehouseappearedtohavebeenrecentlyrepairedandentirelymodernized。Thenametoowasnotthatofthesamelandlordasformerly,butMartinCannister's。
KnightandSmithentered。Theinnwasquitesilent,andtheyfollowedthepassagetilltheyreachedthekitchen,whereahugefirewasburning,whichroaredupthechimney,andsentoverthefloor,ceiling,andnewly-whitenedwallsaglaresointenseastomakethecandlequiteasecondarylight。Awomaninawhiteapronandblackgownwasstandingtherealonebehindacleanly-scrubbeddealtable。Stephenfirst,andKnightafterwards,recognizedherasUnity,whohadbeenparlour-maidatthevicarageandyounglady's-maidattheCrags。
'Unity,'saidStephensoftly,'don'tyouknowme?'
Shelookedinquiringlyamoment,andherfaceclearedup。
'Mr。Smith——ay,thatitis!'shesaid。'Andthat'sMr。Knight。I
begyoutositdown。PerhapsyouknowthatsinceIsawyoulastI
havemarriedMartinCannister。'
'Howlonghaveyoubeenmarried?'
'Aboutfivemonths。WeweremarriedthesamedaythatmydearMissElfiebecameLadyLuxellian。'TearsappearedinUnity'seyes,andfilledthem,andfelldownhercheek,inspiteofeffortstothecontrary。
Thepainofthetwomeninresolutelycontrollingthemselveswhenthusexampledtoadmitreliefofthesamekindwasdistressing。
Theybothturnedtheirbacksandwalkedafewstepsaway。
ThenUnitysaid,'Willyougointotheparlour,gentlemen?'
'Letusstayherewithher,'Knightwhispered,andturningsaid,'No;wewillsithere。Wewanttorestanddryourselveshereforatime,ifyouplease。'
Thateveningthesorrowingfriendssatwiththeirhostessbesidethelargefire,Knightintherecessformedbythechimneybreast,wherehewasinshade。Andbyshowingalittleconfidencetheywonhers,andshetoldthemwhattheyhadstayedtohear——thelatterhistoryofpoorElfride。
'Oneday——afteryou,Mr。Knight,leftusforthelasttime——shewasmissedfromtheCrags,andherfatherwentafterher,andbroughtherhomeill。Whereshewentto,Ineverknew——butshewasveryunwellforweeksafterwards。Andshesaidtomethatshedidn'tcarewhatbecameofher,andshewishedshecoulddie。
Whenshewasbetter,Isaidshewouldlivetobemarriedyet,andshesaidthen,"Yes;I'lldoanythingforthebenefitofmyfamily,soastoturnmyuselesslifetosomepracticalaccount。”
Well,itbeganlikethisaboutLordLuxelliancourtingher。ThefirstLadyLuxellianhaddied,andhewasingreattroublebecausethelittlegirlswereleftmotherless。Afterawhiletheyusedtocomeandseeherintheirlittleblackfrocks,fortheylikedheraswellorbetterthantheirownmother——that'strue。Theyusedtocallher"littlemamma。”Thesechildrenmadeherashadelivelier,butshewasnotthegirlshehadbeen——Icouldseethat——
andshegrewthinneragooddeal。Well,mylordgottoasktheSwancourtsoftenerandoftenertodinner——nobodyelseofhisacquaintance——andatlastthevicar'sfamilywerebackwardsandforwardsatallhoursoftheday。Well,peoplesaythatthelittlegirlsaskedtheirfathertoletMissElfridecomeandlivewiththem,andthathesaidperhapshewouldiftheyweregoodchildren。However,thetimewenton,andonedayIsaid,"MissElfride,youdon'tlooksowellasyouusedto;andthoughnobodyelseseemstonoticeitIdo。”Shelaughedalittle,andsaid,"I
shalllivetobemarriedyet,asyoutoldme。”
'"Shallyou,miss?Iamgladtohearthat,"Isaid。
'"WhomdoyouthinkIamgoingtobemarriedto?"shesaidagain。
'"Mr。Knight,Isuppose,"saidI。
'"Oh!"shecried,andturnedoffsowhite,andaforeIcouldgettohershehadsunkdownlikeaheapofclothes,andfaintedaway。
Well,then,shecametoherselfafteratime,andsaid,"Unity,nowwe'llgoonwithourconversation。”
'"Betternotto-day,miss,"Isaid。
'"Yes,wewill,"shesaid。"WhomdoyouthinkIamgoingtobemarriedto?"
'"Idon'tknow,"Isaidthistime。
'"Guess,"shesaid。
'"'Tisn'tmylord,isit?"saysI。
'"Yes,'tis,"saysshe,inasickwildway。
'"Buthedon'tcomecourtingmuch,"Isaid。
"'Ah!youdon'tknow,"shesaid,andtoldme'twasgoingtobeinOctober。Afterthatshefreshenedupabit——whether'twaswiththethoughtofgettingawayfromhomeornot,Idon'tknow。For,perhaps,Imayaswellspeakplainly,andtellyouthatherhomewasnohometohernow。Herfatherwasbittertoherandharshuponher;andthoughMrs。Swancourtwaswellenoughinherway,'twasasortofcoldpolitenessthatwasnotworthmuch,andthelittlethinghadaworryingtimeofitaltogether。Aboutamonthbeforethewedding,sheandmylordandthetwochildrenusedtorideabouttogetheruponhorseback,andaveryprettysighttheywere;andifyou'llbelieveme,Ineversawhimoncewithherunlessthechildrenwerewithhertoo——whichmadethecourtingsostrange-looking。Ay,andmylordissohandsome,youknow,sothatatlastIthinksheratherlikedhim;andIhaveseenhersmileandblushabitatthingshesaid。Hewantedherthemorebecausethechildrendid,foreverybodycouldseethatshewouldbeamosttendermothertothem,andfriendandplaymatetoo。Andmylordisnotonlyhandsome,butasplendidcourter,anduptoallthewayso't。Sohemadeherthebeautifullestpresents;ah,oneIcanmind——alovelybracelet,withdiamondsandemeralds。
Oh,howredherfacecamewhenshesawit!Theoldrosescamebacktohercheeksforaminuteortwothen。Ihelpeddressherthedaywebothweremarried——itwasthelastserviceIdidher,poorchild!Whenshewasready,Iranupstairsandslippedonmyownweddinggown,andawaytheywent,andawaywentMartinandI;andnosoonerhadmylordandmyladybeenmarriedthantheparsonmarriedus。Itwasaveryquietpairofweddings——hardlyanybodyknewit。Well,hopewillholditsowninayoungheart,ifsobeitcan;andmyladyfreshenedupabit,formylordwasSO
handsomeandkind。'
'Howcameshetodie——andawayfromhome?'murmuredKnight。
'Don'tyousee,sir,shefelloffagainaforethey'dbeenmarriedlong,andmylordtookherabroadforchangeofscene。Theywerecominghome,andhadgotasfarasLondon,whenshewastakenveryillandcouldn'tbemoved,andthereshedied。'
'Washeveryfondofher?'
'What,mylord?Oh,hewas!'
'VERYfondofher?'
'VERY,beyondeverything。Notsuddenly,butbyslowdegrees。
'Twashernaturetowinpeoplemorewhentheyknewherwell。He'dhavediedforher,Ibelieve。Poormylord,he'sheart-brokennow!'
'Thefuneralisto-morrow?'
'Yes;myhusbandisnowatthevaultwiththemasons,openingthestepsandcleaningdownthewalls。'
ThenextdaytwomenwalkedupthefamiliarvalleyfromCastleBotereltoEastEndelstowChurch。Andwhenthefuneralwasover,andeveryonehadleftthelawn-likechurchyard,thepairwentsoftlydownthestepsoftheLuxellianvault,andunderthelow-
groinedarchestheyhadbeheldoncebefore,litupthenasnow。
Inthenewnicheofthecryptlayarathernewcoffin,whichhadlostsomeofitslustre,andanewercoffinstill,brightanduntarnishedintheslightestdegree。
Besidethelatterwasthedarkformofaman,kneelingonthedampfloor,hisbodyflungacrossthecoffin,hishandsclasped,andhiswholeframeseeminglygivenupinutterabandonmenttogrief。
Hewasstillyoung——younger,perhaps,thanKnight——andevennowshowedhowgracefulwashisfigureandsymmetricalhisbuild。Hemurmuredaprayerhalfaloud,andwasquiteunconsciousthattwootherswerestandingwithinafewyardsofhim。
KnightandStephenhadadvancedtowheretheyoncestoodbesideElfrideonthedayallthreehadmetthere,beforeshehadherselfgonedownintosilencelikeherancestors,andshutherbrightblueeyesforever。Notuntilthendidtheyseethekneelingfigureinthedimlight。KnightinstantlyrecognizedthemournerasLordLuxellian,thebereavedhusbandofElfride。
Theyfeltthemselvestobeintruders。KnightpressedStephenback,andtheysilentlywithdrewastheyhadentered。
'Comeaway,'hesaid,inabrokenvoice。'Wehavenorighttobethere。Anotherstandsbeforeus——nearertoherthanwe!'
AndsidebysidetheybothretracedtheirstepsdownthegreystillvalleytoCastleBoterel。
第21章