首页 >出版文学> A Hazard of New Fortunes>第17章
  "Yes,yousee,"Fulkersonadded,"nobodycangivein。"
  "Pardonme,"saidthecolonel,"thecaseisoneinwhichallcangivein。"
  "Idon'tknowwhich'llbegin,"saidFulkerson。
  Thecolonelrose。"Mr。Lindaumustbegin,sir。WemustbeginbyseeingMr。Lindau,andsecuringfromhimtheassurancethatintheexpressionofhispeculiarviewshehadnointentionofofferinganypersonaloffencetoMr。Dryfoos。IfIhaveformedacorrectestimateofMr。Lindau,thiswillbeperfectlysimple。"
  Fulkersonshookhishead。"Butitwouldn'thelp。Dryfoosdon'tcarearapwhetherLindaumeantanypersonaloffenceornot。Asfarasthatisconcerned,he'sgotahidelikeahippopotamus。ButwhathehatesisLindau'sopinions,andwhathesaysisthatnomanwhoholdssuchopinionsshallhaveanyworkfromhim。AndwhatMarchsaysisthatnomanshallbepunishedthroughhimforhisopinions,hedon'tcarewhattheyare。"
  Thecolonelstoodamomentinsilence。"Andwhatdoyouexpectmetodounderthecircumstances?"
  "Icametoyouforadvice——Ithoughtyoumightsuggest——?"
  "DoyouwishmetoseeMr。Dryfoos?"
  "Well,that'saboutthesizeofit,"Fulkersonadmitted。"Yousee,colonel,"hehastenedon,"Iknowthatyouhaveagreatdealofinfluencewithhim;thatarticleofyoursisabouttheonlythinghe'severreadin'EveryOtherWeek,'andhe'sproudofyouracquaintance。Well,youknow"——
  andhereFulkersonbroughtinthefigurethatstruckhimsomuchinBeaton'sphraseandhadbeenonhistongueeversince——"you'rethemanonhorsebacktohim;andhe'dbemoreapttodowhatyousaythanifanybodyelsesaidit。"
  "Youareverygood,sir,"saidthecolonel,tryingtobeproofagainsttheflattery,"butIamafraidyouoverratemyinfluence。"Fulkersonlethimponderitsilently,andhisdaughtergovernedherimpatiencebyholdingherfanagainstherlips。Whatevertheprocesswasinthecolonel'smind,hesaidatlast:"Iseenogoodreasonfordecliningtoactforyou,Mr。Fulkerson,andIshallbeveryhappyifIcanbeofservicetoyou。But"——hestoppedFulkersonfromcuttinginwithprecipitatethanks——"IthinkIhavearight,sir,toaskwhatyourcoursewillbeintheeventoffailure?"
  "Failure?"Fulkersonrepeated,indismay。
  "Yes,sir。Iwillnotconcealfromyouthatthismissionisonenotwhollyagreeabletomyfeelings。"
  "Oh,Iunderstandthat,colonel,andIassureyouthatIappreciate,I——"
  "Thereisnousetryingtoblinkthefact,sir,thattherearecertainaspectsofMr。Dryfoos'scharacterinwhichheisnotagentleman。
  Wehavealludedtothisfactbefore,andIneednotdwelluponitnow:I
  maysay,however,thatmymisgivingswerenotwhollyremovedlastnight。"
  "No,"Fulkersonassented;thoughinhishearthethoughttheoldmanhadbehavedverywell。
  "WhatIwishtosaynowisthatIcannotconsenttoactforyou,inthismatter,merelyasanintermediarywhosefailurewouldleavetheaffairinstatequo。"
  "Isee,"saidFulkerson。
  "AndIshouldlikesomeintimation,someassurance,astowhichpartyyourownfeelingsarewithinthedifference。"
  ThecolonelbenthiseyessharplyonFulkerson;MissWoodburnlethersfall;Fulkersonfeltthathewasbeingtested,andhesaid,togaintime,"AsbetweenLindauandDryfoos?"thoughheknewthiswasnotthepoint。
  "AsbetweenMr。DryfoosandMr。March,"saidthecolonel。
  Fulkersondrewalongbreathandtookhiscourageinbothhands。"Therecan'tbeanychoiceformeinsuchacase。I'mforMarch,everytime。"
  Thecolonelseizedhishand,andMissWoodburnsaid,"Iftherehadbeenanychoicefo'youinsuchacase,Ishouldneverhaveletpapastirastepwithyou。"
  "Why,inregardtothat,"saidthecolonel,witha,literalapplicationoftheidea,"wasityourintentionthatweshouldbothgo?"
  "Well,Idon'tknow;Isupposeitwas。"
  "Ithinkitwillbebetterformetogoalone,"saidthecolonel;and,withacolorfromhisexperienceinaffairsofhonor,headded:"Inthesemattersaprincipalcannotappearwithoutcompromisinghisdignity。
  IbelieveIhaveallthepointsclearlyinmind,andIthinkIshouldactmorefreelyinmeetingMr。Dryfoosalone。"
  Fulkersontriedtohidetheeagernesswithwhichhemettheseagreeableviews。Hefelthimselfexaltedinsomesorttothelevelofthecolonel'ssentiments,thoughitwouldnotbeeasytosaywhetherthiswasthroughthedesperationbredofhavingcommittedhimselftoMarch'sside,orthroughthebuoyanthopehehadthatthecolonelwouldsucceedinhismission。
  "I'mnotafraidtotalkwithDryfoosaboutit,"hesaid。
  "Thereisnoquestionofcourage,"saidthecolonel。"Itisaquestionofdignity——ofpersonaldignity。"
  "Well,don'tletthatdelayyou,papa,"saidhisdaughter,followinghimtothedoor,whereshefoundhimhishat,andFulkersonhelpedhimonwithhisovercoat。"Ahshallbejostwaldtoknowho'it'stonedoat。"
  "Won'tyouletmegouptothehousewithyou?"Fulkersonbegan。
  "Ineedn'tgoin——"
  "Iprefertogoalone,"saidthecolonel。"Iwishtoturnthepointsoverinmymind,andIamafraidyouwouldfindmeratherdullcompany。"
  Hewentout,andFulkersonreturnedwithMissWoodburntothedrawing-
  room,whereshesaidtheLeightonswere。They,werenotthere,butshedidnotseemdisappointed。
  "Well,Mr。Fulkerson,"shesaid,"youhavegotanahdealoffriendship,sureenough。"
  "Me?"saidFulkerson。"Oh,myLord!Don'tyouseeIcouldn'tdoanythingelse?AndI'mscaredhalftodeath,anyway。Ifthecoloneldon'tbringtheoldmanround,Ireckonit'sallupwithme。Buthe'llfetchhim。AndI'mjustprostratedwithgratitudetoyou,MissWoodburn。"
  Shewavedhisthanksasidewithherfan。"Whatdoyoumeanbyitsbeingallupwithyou?"
  "Why,iftheoldmanstickstohisposition,andIsticktoMarch,we'vebothgottogooverboardtogether。Dryfoosownsthemagazine;hecanstopit,orhecanstopus,whichamountstothesamething,asfaraswe'reconcerned。"
  "Andthenwhat?"thegirlpursued。
  "Andthen,nothing——tillwepickourselvesup。"
  "DoyoumeanthatMr。Dryfooswillputyoubothoatofyourplaces?"
  "Hemay。"
  "AndMr。Mawchtakestheriskofthatjostfo'aprinciple?"
  "Ireckon。"
  "Andyoudoitjostfo'anahdeal?"
  "Itwon'tdotoownit。Imusthavemylittleaxetogrind,somewhere。"
  "Well,menawesplendid,"sighedthegirl。"Ahwillsayit。"
  "Oh,they'renotsomuchbetterthanwomen,"saidFulkerson,withanervousjocosity。"IguessMarchwouldhavebackeddownifithadn'tbeenforhiswife。Shewasashotaspepperaboutit,andyoucouldseethatshewouldhavesacrificedallherhusband'srelationssoonerthanlethimbackdownaninchfromthestandhehadtaken。It'sprettyeasyforamantosticktoaprincipleifhehasawomantostandbyhim。
  Butwhenyoucometoplayitalone——"
  "Mr。Fulkerson,"saidthegirl,solemnly,"Ahwillstandbahyouinthis,ifallthewoaldtonesagainstyou。"Thetearscameintohereyes,andsheputoutherhandtohim。
  "Youwill?"heshouted,inarapture。"Ineveryway——andalways——aslongasyoulive?Doyoumeanit?"Hehadcaughtherhandtohisbreastandwasgrapplingittightthereanddrawinghertohim。
  Thechangingemotionschasedoneanotherthroughherheartandoverherface:dismay,shame,pride,tenderness。"Youdon'tbelieve,"shesaid,hoarsely,"thatAhmeantthat?"
  "No,butIhopeyoudomeanit;forifyoudon't,nothingelsemeansanything。"
  Therewasnospace,therewasonlyapointofwavering。"Ahdomeanit。"
  Whentheyliftedtheireyesfromeachotheragainitwashalf-pastten。
  "No'youmostgo,"shesaid。
  "Butthecolonel——ourfate?"
  "Theco'nelisoftenoatlate,andAh'mnotafraidofouahfate,no'thatwe'vetakenitintoouahownhands。"Shelookedathimwithdewyeyesoftrust,ofinspiration。
  "Oh,it'sgoingtocomeoutallright,"hesaid。"Itcan'tcomeoutwrongnow,nomatterwhathappens。Butwho'dhavethoughtit,whenI
  cameintothishouse,insuchastateofsinandmisery,halfanhourago——"
  "Threehouahsandahalfago!"shesaid。"No!youmostjostgo。Ah'mtahedtodeath。Good-night。Youcancomeinthemawningtosee-papa。"
  Sheopenedthedoorandpushedhimoutwithenrapturingviolence,andheranlaughingdownthestepsintoherfather'sarms。
  "Why,colonel!Iwasjustgoinguptomeetyou。"Hehadreallythoughthewouldwalkoffhisexultationinthatdirection。
  "Iamverysorrytosay,Mr。Fulkerson,"thecolonelbegan,gravely,"thatMr。Dryfoosadherestohisposition。"
  "Oh,allright,"saidFulkerson,withunabatedjoy。"It'swhatI
  expected。Well,mycourseisclear;IshallstandbyMarch,andIguesstheworldwon'tcometoanendifhebouncesusboth。ButI'meverlastinglyobligedtoyou,ColonelWoodburn,andIdon'tknowwhattosaytoyou。I——Iwon'tdetainyounow;it'ssolate。I'llseeyouinthemorning。Good-ni——"
  Fulkersondidnotrealizethatittakestwotopart。Thecolonellaidholdofhisarmandturnedawaywithhim。"Iwillwalktowardyourplacewithyou。IcanunderstandwhyyoushouldbeanxioustoknowtheparticularsofmyinterviewwithMr。Dryfoos";andinthestatementwhichfollowedhedidnotsparehimthesmallest。Itoutlastedtheirwalkanddetainedthemlongonthestepsofthe'EveryOtherWeek'building。ButattheendFulkersonlethimselfinwithhiskeyaslightofheartasifhehadbeenlisteningtothegayestpromisesthatfortunecouldmake。
  BythetunehemetMarchattheofficenextmorning,alittle,butonlyaverylittle,misgivingsaddenedhisgoldenheaven。HetookMarch'shandwithhighcourage,andsaid,"Well,theoldmanstickstohispoint,March。"Headded,withthesenseofsayingitbeforeMissWoodburn:"AndIstickbyyou。I'vethoughtitallover,andI'dratherberightwithyouthanwrongwithhim。"
  "Well,Iappreciateyourmotive,Fulkerson,"saidMarch。"Butperhaps——
  perhapswecansaveoverourheroicsforanotheroccasion。Lindauseemstohavegotinwithhis,forthepresent。"
  HetoldhimofLindau'slastvisit,andtheystoodamomentlookingateachotherratherqueerly。Fulkersonwasthefirsttorecoverhisspirits。"Well,"hesaid,cheerily,"thatlet'susout。"
  "Doesit?I'mnotsureitletsmeout,"saidMarch;buthesaidthisintributetohiscrippledself-respectratherthanasaforecastofanyactioninthematter。
  "Why,whatareyougoingtodo?"Fulkersonasked。"IfLindauwon'tworkforDryfoos,youcan'tmakehim。"
  Marchsighed。"Whatareyougoingtodowiththismoney?"Heglancedattheheapofbillshehadflungonthetablebetweenthem。
  Fulkersonscratchedhishead。"Ah,doggedifIknow:Can'twegiveittothedeservingpoor,somehow,ifwecanfind'em?"
  "Isupposewe'venorighttouseitinanyway。YoumustgiveittoDryfoos。"
  "Tothedeservingrich?Well,youcanalwaysfindthem。Ireckonyoudon'twanttoappearinthetransaction!Idon't,either;butIguessI
  must。"FulkersongatheredupthemoneyandcarriedittoConrad。
  Hedirectedhimtoaccountforitinhisbooksasconscience-money,andheenjoyedthejokemorethanConradseemedtodowhenhewastoldwhereitcamefrom。
  Fulkersonwasabletowearoffthedisagreeableimpressiontheaffairleftduringthecourseofthefore-noon,andhemetMissWoodburnwithallalover'sbuoyancywhenhewenttolunch。Shewasashappyashewhenhetoldherhowfortunatelythewholethinghadended,andhetookherviewthatitwasarewardofhiscourageinhavingdaredtheworst。
  Theybothfelt,asthenewlyplightedalwaysdo,thattheywereinthebestrelationswiththebeneficentpowers,andthattheirfelicityhadbeenespeciallylookedtointhedispositionofevents。Theywereinaglowofrapturouscontentwiththemselvesandradiantworshipofeachother;shewassurethathemeritedthebrightfutureopeningtothemboth,asmuchasifheoweditdirectlytosomenobleactionofhisown;
  hefeltthathewasindebtedforthefavorofHeavenentirelytothestillincredibleaccidentofherpreferenceofhimoverothermen。
  ColonelWoodburn,whowasnotyetinthesecretoftheirlove,perhapsfailedforthisreasontosharetheirsatisfactionwitharesultsounexpectedlybroughtabout。TheblessingontheirhopesseemedtohisignorancetoinvolvecertainsacrificesofpersonalfeelingatwhichhehintedinsuggestingthatDryfoosshouldnowbeaskedtomakesomeabstractconcessionsandacknowledgments;hisdaughterhastenedtodenythatthesewereatallnecessary;andFulkersoneasilyexplainedwhy。
  Thethingwasover;whatwastheuseofopeningitupagain?
  "Perhapsnone,"thecoloneladmitted。Butheadded,"IshouldliketheopportunityoftakingMr。Lindau'shandinthepresenceofMr。DryfoosandassuringhimthatIconsideredhimamanofprincipleandamanofhonor——agentleman,sir,whomIwasproudandhappytohaveknown。"
  "Well,Ah'venodoabt,"saidhisdaughter,demurely,"thatyou'llhavethechancesomeday;andwewouldalllahketojoinyou。Butatthesametahme,AhthinkMr。Fulkersoniswelloatofitfo'thepresent。"
  EndAHazardofNewFortunesV5
  ByWilliamDeanHowellsPARTFIFTH
  I。
  Superficially,theaffairsof'EveryOtherWeek'settledintotheirwontedformagain,andforFulkersontheyseemedthoroughlyreinstated。
  ButMarchhadafeelingofimpermanencyfromwhathadhappened,mixedwithafantasticsenseofshametowardLindau。HedidnotsympathizewithLindau'sopinions;hethoughthisremedyforexistingevilsaswildlyimpracticableasColonelWoodburn's。Butwhilehethoughtthis,andwhilehecouldjustlyblameFulkersonforLindau'spresenceatDryfoos'sdinner,whichhiszealhadbroughtaboutinspiteofMarch'sprotests,stillhecouldnotridhimselfofthereproachofuncandorwithLindau。Heoughttohavetoldhimfranklyabouttheownershipofthemagazine,andwhatmannerofmanthemanwaswhosemoneyhewastaking。
  Buthesaidthathenevercouldhaveimaginedthathewasseriousinhispreposterousattitudeinregardtoaclassofmenwhoembodyhalftheprosperityofthecountry;andhehadmomentsofrevoltagainsthisownhumiliationbeforeLindau,inwhichhefounditmonstrousthatheshouldreturnDryfoos'smoneyasifithadbeenthespoilofarobber。Hiswifeagreedwithhiminthesemoments,andsaiditwasagreatreliefnottohavethattiresomeoldGermancomingabout。Theyhadtoaccountforhisabsenceevasivelytothechildren,whomtheycouldnotverywelltellthattheirfatherwaslivingonmoneythatLindaudisdainedtotake,eventhoughLindauwaswrongandtheirfatherwasright。ThisheightenedMrs。
  March'sresentmenttowardbothLindauandDryfoos,whobetweenthemhadplacedherhusbandinafalseposition。Ifanything,sheresentedDryfoos'sconductmorethanLindau's。HehadneverspokentoMarchabouttheaffairsinceLindauhadrenouncedhiswork,oraddedtotheapologeticmessageshehadsentbyFulkerson。SofarasMarchknew,DryfooshadbeenlefttosupposethatLindauhadsimplystoppedforsomereasonthatdidnotpersonallyaffecthim。Theyneverspokeofhim,andMarchwastooproudtoaskeitherFulkersonorConradwhethertheoldmanknewthatLindauhadreturnedhismoney。HeavoidedtalkingtoConrad,fromafeelingthatifbedidheshouldinvoluntarilyleadhimontospeakofhisdifferenceswithhisfather。BetweenhimselfandFulkerson,even,hewasuneasilyawareofawantoftheiroldperfectfriendliness。
  Fulkersonhadfinallybehavedwithhonorandcourage;buthisprovisionalreluctancehadgivenMarchthemeasureofFulkerson'scharacterinonedirection,andhecouldnotignorethefactthatitwassmallerthanhecouldhavewished。
  HecouldnotmakeoutwhetherFulkersonsharedhisdiscomfortornot。
  Itcertainlyworeaway,evenwithMarch,astimepassed,andwithFulkerson,intheblissofhisfortunatelove,itwasprobablyfarmoretransient,ifitexistedatall。Headvancedintothewinterasradiantlyasiftomeetthespring,andhesaidthatiftherewereanypleasantermonthoftheyearthanNovember,itwasDecember,especiallywhentheweatherwasgoodandwetandmuddymostofthetime,sothatyouhadtokeepindoorsalongwhileafteryoucalledanywhere。
  ColonelWoodburnhadtheanxiety,inviewofhisdaughter'sengagement,whensheaskedhisconsenttoit,thatsuchadreamermusthaveinregardtoanyrealitythatthreatenstoaffectthecourseofhisreveries。Hehadnotperhapstakenhermarriageintoaccount,exceptasaremotecontingency;andcertainlyFulkersonwasnotthekindofson-in-lawthathehadimaginedindealingwiththatabstraction。Butbecausehehadnothingofthesortdefinitelyinmind,hecouldnotopposetheselectionofFulkersonwithsuccess;hereallyknewnothingagainsthim,andheknew,manythingsinhisfavor;Fulkersoninspiredhimwiththelikingthateveryonefeltforhiminameasure;heamusedhim,hecheeredhim;
  andthecolonelhadbeensomuchusedtoleavingactionofallkindstohisdaughterthatwhenhecametoclosequarterswiththequestionofason-in-lawhefelthelplesstodecideit,andheletherdecideit,asifitwerestilltobedecidedwhenitwassubmittedtohim。Shewascompetenttotreatitinallitsphases:notmerelythoseofpersonalinterest,butthoseofdutytothebrokenSouthernpast,sentimentallydeartohim,andpracticallyabsurdtoher。NosuchSouthasherememberedhadeverexistedtoherknowledge,andnosuchcivilizationasheimaginedwouldeverexist,toherbelief,anywhere。Shetooktheworldasshefoundit,andmadethebestofit。ShetrustedinFulkerson;shehadprovedhismagnanimityinaseriousemergency;andinsmallthingsshewaswillingfearlesslytochanceitwithhim。Shewasnotasentimentalist,andtherewasnothingfantasticinherexpectations;shewasagirlofgoodsenseandrightmind,andshelikedtheimmediatepracticalityaswellasthefinalhonorofFulkerson。Shedidnotidealizehim,butinthehighesteffectsherealizedhim;shedidhimjustice,andshewouldnothavebelievedthatshedidhimmorethanjusticeifshehadsometimesknownhimtodohimselfless。
  TheirengagementwasafacttowhichtheLeightonhouseholdadjusteditselfalmostassimplyastheloversthemselves;MissWoodburntoldtheladiesatonce,anditwasnotathingthatFulkersoncouldkeepfromMarchverylong。HesentwordofittoMrs。Marchbyherhusband;andhisengagementperhapsdidmorethananythingelsetoconfirmtheconfidenceinhimwhichhadbeenshakenbyhisearlybehaviorintheLindauepisode,andnotwhollyrestoredbyhistardyfidelitytoMarch。
  Butnowshefeltthatamanwhowishedtogetmarriedsoobviouslyandentirelyforlovewasfullofallkindsofthebestinstincts,andonlyneededtheguidanceofawife,tobecomeverynoble。Sheinterestedherselfintenselyinbalancingtherespectivemeritsoftheengagedcouple,andafterhercalluponMissWoodburninhernewcharactershepridedherselfuponrecognizingtheworthofsomestrictlySouthernqualitiesinher,whilemaintainingthegeneralaverageofNewEnglandsuperiority。ShecouldnotreconcileherselftotheVirginiancustomillustratedinherhavingbeenchristenedwiththesurnameofMadison;
  andshesaidthatitspetformofMad,whichFulkersonpromptlyinvented,onlymadeitmoreridiculous。
  FulkersonwasslowerintellingBeaton。Hewasafraid,somehow,ofBeaton'stakingthematterinthecynicalway;MissWoodburnsaidshewouldbreakofftheengagementifBeatonwaslefttoguessitorfinditoutbyaccident,andthenFulkersonpluckeduphiscourage。Beatonreceivedthenewswithgravity,andwithasortofmelancholymeeknessthatstronglymovedFulkerson'ssympathy,andmadehimwishthatBeatonwasengaged,too。
  ItmadeBeatonfeelveryold;itsomehowlefthimbehindandforgotten;
  inamanner,itmadehimfeeltrifledwith。Somethingoftheunfriendlinessoffateseemedtoovercasthisresentment,andheallowedthesadnessofhisconvictionthathehadnotthemeanstomarryontotingehisrecognitionofthefactthatAlmaLeightonwouldnothavewantedhimtomarryherifhehad。Hewasnowofteninthatmartyrmoodinwhichhewishedtohelphisfather;notonlytodenyhimselfChianti,buttoforegoafur-linedovercoatwhichheintendedtogetforthewinter,HepostponedthemomentofactualsacrificeasregardedtheChianti,andheboughttheovercoatinananguishofself-reproach。
  HeworeitthefirsteveningafterhegotitingoingtocallupontheLeightons,anditseemedtohimapieceofghastlyironywhenAlmacomplimentedhispicturesquenessinitandaskedhimtolethersketchhim。
  "Oh,youcansketchme,"hesaid,withsomuchgloomthatitmadeherlaugh。
  "Ifyouthinkit'ssoserious,I'drathernot。"
  "No,no!Goahead!Howdoyouwantme?"
  Oh,flingyourselfdownonachairinoneofyourattitudesofstudiednegligence;andtwistonecornerofyourmustachewithaffectedabsenceofmind。"
  "AndyouthinkI'malwaysstudied,alwaysaffected?"
  "Ididn'tsayso。"
  "Ididn'taskyouwhatyousaid。"
  "AndIwon'ttellyouwhatIthink。"
  "Ah,Iknowwhatyouthink。"
  "Whatmadeyouask,then?"Thegirllaughedagainwiththesatisfactionofhersexincorneringaman。
  Beatonmadeashowofnotdeigningtoreply,andputhimselfintheposeshesuggested,frowning。
  "Ah,that'sit。Butalittlemoreanimation——
  "'Aswhenagreatthoughtstrikesalongthebrain,Andflushesallthecheek。'"
  Sheputherforeheaddownonthebackofherhandandlaughedagain。
  "Yououghttobephotographed。Youlookasifyouweresittingforit。"
  Beatonsaid:"That'sbecauseIknowIambeingphotographed,inoneway。
  Idon'tthinkyououghttocallmeaffected。Ineveramsowithyou;I
  knowitwouldn'tbeofanyuse。"
  "Oh,Mr。Beaton,youflatter。"
  "No,Ineverflatteryou。"
  "Imeantyouflatteredyourself。"
  "How?"
  "Oh,Idon'tknow。Imagine。"
  "Iknowwhatyoumean。YouthinkIcan'tbesincerewithanybody。"
  "Ohno,Idon't。"
  "Whatdoyouthink?"
  "Thatyoucan't——try。"Almagaveanothervictoriouslaugh。
  MissWoodburnandFulkersonwouldoncehavebothfeignedagreatinterestinAlma'ssketchingBeaton,andmadeitthesubjectoftalk,inwhichtheyapproachedasnearlyaspossibletherealinterestoftheirlives。
  Nowtheyfranklyremainedawayinthedining-room,whichwasverycozyafterthedinnerhaddisappeared;thecolonelsatwithhislampandpaperinthegallerybeyond;Mrs。Leightonwasaboutherhousekeepingaffairs,inthecontentshealwaysfeltwhenAlmawaswithBeaton。
  "Theyseemtobehavingaprettygoodtimeinthere,"saidFulkerson,detachinghimselffromhisownabsolutegoodtimeaswellashecould。
  "AtleastAlmadoes,"saidMissWoodburn。
  "Doyouthinkshecaresforhim?"
  "Quahteasmochashedesoves。"
  "WhatmakesyoualldownonBeatonaroundhere?He'snotsuchabadfellow。"
  "Weawenotalldoanonhim。Mrs。Leightonisn'tdoanonhim。"
  "Oh,Iguessifitwastheoldlady,therewouldn'tbemuchquestionaboutit。"
  Theybothlaughed,andAlmasaid,"Theyseemtobegreatlyamusedwithsomethinginthere。"
  "Me,probably,"saidBeaton。"Iseemtoamuseeverybodyto-night。"
  "Don'tyoualways?"
  "Ialwaysamuseyou,I'mafraid,Alma。"
  Shelookedathimasifsheweregoingtosnubhimopenlyforusinghername;butapparentlyshedecidedtodoitcovertly。"Youdidn'tatfirst。Ireallyusedtobelieveyoucouldbeserious,once。"
  "Couldn'tyoubelieveitagain?Now?"
  "Notwhenyouputonthatwind-harpstop。"
  "Wetmorehasbeentalkingtoyouaboutme。Hewouldsacrificehisbestfriendtoaphrase。Hespendshistimemakingthem。"
  "He'smadesomeveryprettyonesaboutyou。"
  "Liketheoneyoujustquoted?"
  "No,notexactly。Headmiresyoueversomuch。Hesays"Shestopped,teasingly。
  "What?"
  "Hesaysyoucouldbealmostanythingyouwished,ifyoudidn'twishtobeeverything。"
  "ThatsoundsmoreliketheschoolofWetmore。That'swhatyousay,Alma。
  Well,ifthereweresomethingyouwishedmetobe,Icouldbeit。"
  "WemightadaptKingsley:'Begood,sweetman,andletwhowillbeclever。'"Hecouldnothelplaughing。Shewenton:"Ialwaysthoughtthatwasthemostpatronizingandexasperatingthingeveraddressedtoahumangirl;andwe'vehadtostandagooddealinourtime。Ishouldliketohaveitappliedtotheother'sect'awhile。Asifanygirlthatwasagirlwouldbegoodifshehadtheremotestchanceofbeingclever。"
  "Thenyouwouldn'twishmetobegood?"Beatonasked。
  "Notifyouwereagirl。"
  "Youwanttoshockme。Well,IsupposeIdeserveit。ButifIwereone-
  tenthpartasgoodasyouare,Alma,IshouldhavealighterheartthanI
  havenow。IknowthatI'mfickle,butI'mnotfalse,asyouthinkIam。"
  "WhosaidIthoughtyouwerefalse?"
  "Noone,"saidBeaton。"Itisn'tnecessary,whenyoulookit——liveit。"
  "Oh,dear!Ididn'tknowIdevotedmywholetimetothesubject。"
  "IknowI'mdespicable。Icouldtellyousomething——thehistoryofthisday,even——thatwouldmakeyoudespiseme。"Beatonhadinmindhispurchaseoftheovercoat,whichAlmawasgettinginsoeffectively,withthemoneyheoughttohavesenthisfather。"But,"hewenton,darkly,withasensethatwhathewasthatmomentsufferingforhisselfishnessmustsomehowbeakindofatonement,whichwouldfinallyleavehimtotheguiltlessenjoymentoftheovercoat,"youwouldn'tbelievethedepthsofbasenessIcoulddescendto。"
  "Iwouldtry,"saidAlma,rapidlyshadingthecollar,"ifyou'dgivemesomehint。"
  Beatonhadasuddenwishtopourouthisremorsetoher,buthewasafraidofherlaughingathim。Hesaidtohimselfthatthiswasaverywholesomefear,andthatifhecouldalwayshaveherathandheshouldnotmakeafoolofhimselfsooften。Amanconceivesofsuchanofficeastheverynoblestforawoman;heworshipsherforitifheismagnanimous。ButBeatonwassilent,andAlmaputbackherheadfortherightdistanceonhersketch。"Mr。FulkersonthinksyouarethesublimestofhumanbeingsforadvisinghimtogetColonelWoodburntointerviewMr。DryfoosaboutLindau。WhathaveyoueverdonewithyourJudas?"
  "Ihaven'tdoneanythingwithit。Nadelthoughthewouldtakeholdofitatonetime,buthedroppeditagain。Afterall,Idon'tsupposeitcouldbepopularized。Fulkersonwantedtoofferitasapremiumtosubscribersfor'EveryOtherWeek,'butIsatdownonthat。"
  Almacouldnotfeeltheabsurdityofthis,andshemerelysaid,"'EveryOtherWeek'seemstobegoingonjustthesameasever。"
  "Yes,thetroublehasallblownover,Ibelieve。Fulkerson,"saidBeaton,withareturntowhattheyweresaying,"hasmanagedthewholebusinessverywell。Butheexaggeratesthevalueofmyadvice。"
  "Verylikely,"Almasuggested,vaguely。"Or,no!Excuseme!Hecouldn't,hecouldn't!"ShelaugheddelightedlyatBeaton'sfoolishlookofembarrassment。
  Hetriedtorecoverhisdignityinsaying,"He's'averygoodfellow,andhedeserveshishappiness。"
  "Oh,indeed!"saidAlma,perversely。"Doesanyonedeservehappiness?"
  "IknowIdon't,"sighedBeaton。
  "Youmeanyoudon'tgetit。"
  "Icertainlydon'tgetit。"
  "Ah,butthatisn'tthereason。"
  "Whatis?"
  "That'sthesecretoftheuniverse,"Shebitinherlowerlip,andlookedathimwitheyes,ofgleamingfun。
  "Areyouneverserious?"heasked。
  "Withseriouspeoplealways。"
  "Iamserious;andyouhavethesecretofmyhappiness——"Hethrewhimselfimpulsivelyforwardinhischair。
  "Oh,pose,pose!"shecried。
  "Iwon'tpose,"heanswered,"andyouhavegottolistentome。YouknowI'minlovewithyou;andIknowthatonceyoucaredforme。Can'tthattime——won'tit——comebackagain?Trytothinkso,Alma!"
  "No,"shesaid,brieflyandseriouslyenough。
  "Butthatseemsimpossible。WhatisitI'vedonewhathaveyouagainstme?"
  "Nothing。Butthattimeispast。Icouldn'trecallitifIwished。Whydidyoubringitup?You'vebrokenyourword。YouknowIwouldn'thaveletyoukeepcominghereifyouhadn'tpromisednevertorefertoit。"
  "HowcouldIhelpit?Withthathappinessnearus——Fulkerson——"
  "Oh,it'sthat?Imighthaveknownit!"
  "No,itisn'tthat——it'ssomethingfardeeper。Butifit'snothingyouhaveagainstme,whatisit,Alma,thatkeepsyoufromcaringformenowasyoudidthen?Ihaven'tchanged。"
  "ButIhave。Ishallnevercareforyouagain,Mr。Beaton;youmightaswellunderstanditonceforall。Don'tthinkit'sanythinginyourself,orthatIthinkyouunworthyofme。I'mnotsoself-satisfiedasthat;
  IknowverywellthatI'mnotaperfectcharacter,andthatI'venoclaimonperfectioninanybodyelse。Ithinkwomenwhowantthatarefools;
  theywon'tgetit,andtheydon'tdeserveit。ButI'velearnedagood。
  dealmoreaboutmyselfthanIknewinSt。Barnaby,andalifeofwork,ofart,andofartalonethat'swhatI'vemadeupmymindto。"
  "Awomanthat'smadeuphermindtothathasnohearttohinderher!"
  "Wouldamanhavethathaddoneso?"
  "ButIdon'tbelieveyou,Alma。You'remerelylaughingatme。And,besides,withmeyouneedn'tgiveupart。Wecouldworktogether。YouknowhowmuchIadmireyourtalent。IbelieveIcouldhelpit——serveit;
  Iwouldbeitswillingslave,andyours,Heavenknows!"
  "Idon'twantanyslave——noranyslavery。Iwanttobefreealways。Nowdoyousee?Idon'tcareforyou,andInevercouldintheoldway;butIshouldhavetocareforsomeonemorethanIbelieveIevershalltogiveupmywork。Shallwegoon?"Shelookedathersketch。
  "No,weshallnotgoon,"hesaid,gloomily,asherose。
  "Isupposeyoublameme,"shesaid,risingtoo。
  "Ohno!Iblamenoone——oronlymyself。Ithrewmychanceaway。"
  "I'mgladyouseethat;andI'mgladyoudidit。Youdon'tbelieveme,ofcourse。Whydomenthinklifecanbeonlytheonethingtowomen?
  Andifyoucometotheselfishview,whoarethehappywomen?I'msurethatifworkdoesn'tfailme,healthwon't,andhappinesswon't。"
  "Butyoucouldworkonwithme——"
  "Secondfiddle。DoyousupposeIshouldn'tbewomanenoughtowishmyworkalwayslessandlowerthanyours?AtleastI'veheartenoughforthat!"
  "You'veheartenoughforanything,Alma。Iwasafooltosayyouhadn't。"
  "Ithinkthewomenwhokeeptheirheartshaveanevenchance,atleast,ofhavingheart——"
  "Ah,there'swhereyou'rewrong!"
  "Butmineisn'tminetogiveyou,anyhow。AndnowIdon'twantyouevertospeaktomeaboutthisagain。"
  "Oh,there'snodanger!"hecried,bitterly。"Ishallneverwillinglyseeyouagain。"
  "That'sasyoulike,Mr。Beaton。We'vehadtobeveryfrank,butIdon'tseewhyweshouldn'tbefriends。Still,weneedn't,ifyoudon'tlike。"
  "AndImaycome——Imaycomehere——as——asusual?"
  "Why,ifyoucanconsistently,"shesaid,withasmile,andsheheldoutherhandtohim。
  Hewenthomedazed,andfeelingasifitwereabadjokethathadbeenputuponhim。Atleasttheaffairwentsodeepthatitestrangedtheaspectofhisfamiliarstudio。Someofthethingsinitwerenotveryfamiliar;hehadspentlatelyagreatdealonrugs,onstuffs,onJapanesebric-a-brac。Whenhesawthesethingsintheshopshehadfeltthathemusthavethem;thattheywerenecessarytohim;andhewaspartlyindebtforthem,stillwithouthavingsentanyofhisearningstopayhisfather。Ashelookedatthemnowhelikedtofancysomethingweirdandconsciousinthemasthesilentwitnessesofabrokenlife。
  Hefeltaboutamongsomeofthesmallerobjectsonthemantelforhispipe。Beforeheslepthewasaware,intheluxuryofhisdespair,ofaremoterelief,anescape;and,afterall,theunderstandinghehadcometowithAlmawasonlytheexplicitformulationoftermslongtacitbetweenthem。Beatonwouldhavebeenpuzzledmorethanheknewifshehadtakenhimseriously。Itwasinevitablethatheshoulddeclarehimselfinlovewithher;buthewasnotdisappointedatherrejectionofhislove;perhapsnotsomuchashewouldhavebeenatitsacceptance,thoughhetriedtothinkotherwise,andtogivehimselfairsoftragedy。
  Hedidnotreallyfeelthattheresultwasworsethanwhathadgonebefore,anditlefthimfree。
  ButhedidnotgototheLeightonsagainforsolongatimethatMrs。
  LeightonaskedAlmawhathadhappened。Almatoldher。
  "Andhewon'tcomeanymore?"hermothersighed,withreservedcensure。
  "Oh,Ithinkhewill。Hecouldn'tverywellcomethenextnight。Buthehasthehabitofcoming,andwithMr。Beatonhabitiseverything——eventhehabitofthinkinghe'sinlovewithsomeone。"
  "Alma,"saidhermother,"Idon'tthinkit'sveryniceforagirltoletayoungmankeepcomingtoseeheraftershe'srefusedhim。"
  "Whynot,ifitamuseshimanddoesn'thurtthegirl?"
  "Butitdoeshurther,Alma。It——it'sindelicate。Itisn'tfairtohim;
  itgiveshimhopes。"
  "Well,mamma,ithasn'thappenedinthegivencaseyet。IfMr。Beatoncomesagain,Iwon'tseehim,andyoucanforbidhimthehouse。"
  "IfIcouldonlyfeelsure,Alma,"saidhermother,takingupanotherbranchoftheinquiry,"thatyoureallyknewyourownmind,Ishouldbeeasieraboutit。"
  "Thenyoucanrestperfectlyquiet,mamma。Idoknowmyownmind;and,what'sworse,IknowMr。Beaton'smind。"
  "Whatdoyoumean?"
  "ImeanthathespoketometheothernightsimplybecauseMr。
  Fulkerson'sengagementhadbrokenhimallup。"
  "Whatexpressions!"Mrs。Leightonlamented。
  "Heletitouthimself,"Almawenton。"Andyouwouldn'thavethoughtitwasveryflatteringyourself。WhenI'mmadeloveto,afterthis,Iprefertobemadelovetoinanoff-year,whenthereisn'tanotherengagedcoupleanywhereabout。"
  "Didyoutellhimthat,Alma?"
  "Tellhimthat!Whatdoyoumean,mamma?Imaybeindelicate,butI'mnotquitesoindelicateasthat。"
  "Ididn'tmeanyouwereindelicate,really,Alma,butIwantedtowarnyou。IthinkMr。Beatonwasverymuchinearnest。"
  "Oh,sodidhe!"
  "Andyoudidn't?"
  "Ohyes,forthetimebeing。Isupposehe'sverymuchinearnestwithMissVanceattimes,andwithMissDryfoosatothers。Sometimeshe'sapainter,andsometimeshe'sanarchitect,andsometimeshe'sasculptor。
  Hehastoomanygifts——toomanytastes。"
  "AndifMissVanceandMissDryfoos——"
  "Oh,dosaySculptureandArchitecture,mamma!It'sgettingsodreadfullypersonal!"
  "Alma,youknowthatIonlywishtogetatyourrealfeelinginthematter。"
  "AndyouknowthatIdon'twanttoletyou——especiallywhenIhaven'tgotanyrealfeelinginthematter。ButIshouldthink——speakingintheabstractentirely——thatifeitherofthoseartswasevergoingtobeinearnestabouthim,itwouldwanthisexclusivedevotionforaweekatleast。"
  "Ididn'tknow,"saidMrs。Leighton,"thathewasdoinganythingnowattheothers。Ithoughthewasentirelytakenupwithhisworkon'EveryOtherWeek。'"
  "Oh,heis!heis!"
  "Andyoucertainlycan'tsay,mydear,thathehasn'tbeenverykind——
  veryusefultoyou,inthatmatter。"
  "AndsoIoughttohavesaidyesoutofgratitude?Thankyou,mamma!I
  didn'tknowyouheldmesocheap。"
  "YouknowwhetherIholdyoucheapornot,Alma。Idon'twantyoutocheapenyourself。Idon'twantyoutotriflewithanyone。Iwantyoutobehonestwithyourself。"
  "Well,comenow,mamma!Supposeyoubegin。I'vebeenperfectlyhonestwithmyself,andI'vebeenhonestwithMr。Beaton。Idon'tcareforhim,andI'vetoldhimIdidn't;sohemaybesupposedtoknowit。Ifhecomeshereafterthis,he'llcomeasaplain,unostentatiousfriendofthefamily,andit'sforyoutosaywhetherheshallcomeinthatcapacityornot。Ihopeyouwon'ttriflewithhim,andlethimgetthenotionthathe'scomingonanyotherbasis。"
  Mrs。Leightonfeltthecomfortofthecriticalattitudefartookeenlytoabandonitforanythingconstructive。Sheonlysaid,"Youknowverywell,Alma,that'samatterIcanhavenothingtodowith。"
  "Thenyouleavehimentirelytome?"
  "Ihopeyouwillregardhisrighttocandidandopentreatment。"
  "He'shadnothingbutthemostopenandcandidtreatmentfromme,mamma。
  It'syouthatwantstoplayfastandloosewithhim。And,totellyouthetruth,Ibelievehewouldlikethatagooddealbetter;Ibelievethat,ifthere'sanythinghehates,it'sopennessandcandor。"
  Almalaughed,andputherarmsroundhermother,whocouldnothelplaughingalittle,too。
  II。
  ThewinterdidnotrenewforChristineandMelathesocialopportunitywhichthespringhadoffered。AfterthemusicaleatMrs。Horn's,theybothmadetheirparty-call,asMelasaid,indueseason;buttheydidnotfindMrs。Hornathome,andneithershenorMissVancecametoseethemafterpeoplereturnedtotowninthefall。TheytriedtobelieveforatimethatMrs。Hornhadnotgottheircards;thispretencefailedthem,andtheyfellbackupontheirpride,orratherChristine'spride。Melahadlittlebuthergood-naturetoavailherinanyexigency,andifMrs。
  HornorMissVancehadcometocallafterayearofneglect,shewouldhavereceivedthemasamiablyasiftheyhadnotlostadayincoming。
  ButChristinehaddrawnalinebeyondwhichtheywouldnothavebeenforgiven;andshehadplannedthewordsandthebehaviorwithwhichshewouldhavepunishedthemiftheyhadappearedthen。Neithersisterimaginedherselfinanywiseinferiortothem;butChristinewassuspicious,atleast,anditwasMelawhoinventedthehypothesisofthelostcards。Asnothinghappenedtoproveortodisprovethefact,shesaid,"ImoveweputCoonroduptogittun'itoutofMissVance,atsomeoftheirmeetun's。"
  "Ifyoudo,"saidChristine,"I'llkillyou。"
  Christine,however,hadthevisitsofBeatontoconsoleher,and,iftheseseemedtohavenodefiniteaim,shewaswillingtorestinthepleasuretheygavehervanity;butMelahadnothing。Sometimessheevenwishedtheywereallbackonthefarm。
  "Itwouldbethebestthingforbothofyou,"saidMrs。Dryfoos,inanswertosuchaburstofdesperation。"Idon'tthinkNewYorkisanyplaceforgirls。"
  "Well,whatIhate,mother,"saidMela,"is,itdon'tseemtobeanyplaceforyoungmen,either。"ShefoundthissogoodwhenshehadsaiditthatshelaughedoverittillChristinewasangry。
  "Abodywouldthinktherehadneverbeenanyjokebefore。"
  "Idon'tseeasit'sajoke,"saidMrs。Dryfoos。"It'stheplaintruth。"
  "Oh,don'tmindher,mother,"saidMela。"She'sputoutbecauseheroldMr。Beatonha'r'tbeenroundforacoupleo'weeks。Ifyoudon'twatchout,thatfellow'llgiveyoutheslipyit,Christine,afterallyourpains。"
  "Well,thereain'tanybodytogiveyoutheslip,Mela,"Christineclawedback。
  "No;Iha'n'teversetmytrapsforanybody。"ThiswaswhatMelasaidforwantofabetterretort;butitwasnotquitetrue。WhenKendrickscamewithBeatontocallafterherfather'sdinner,sheusedallhercunningtoensnarehim,andshehadhimtoherselfaslongasBeatonstayed;Dryfoossentdownwordthathewasnotverywellandhadgonetobed。ThenoveltyofMelahadwornoffforKendricks,andshefoundhim,asshefranklytoldhim,nothalfasentertainingashewasatMrs。