"Youwereratherdistantthen,"Idaremarkedwithapiquantsmile.
"ButamInow?Answermethat,"hesaidsoeagerlythatshewasagainmentallyenragedathertell-talecolor,andshesaidhastily:
"ButwhereamItofindtheambrosiaandnectarthatyouwillexpectthisevening?"
"Anymarketcanfurnishthecrudematerials.Itisthetouchofthehostessthattransmutesthem."
"Alas,"saidIda,"Ineverlearnedhowtocook.IfIshouldprepareyourdinner,youwouldhaveanawfulmoodto-morrow,andprobablysendforthedoctor."
"Iwouldneedanursemorethanadoctor."
"Iknowofanancientwoman——aperfectMrs.Harris,"saidIda,gleefully.
"Wouldn'tyoucomeandseemeifIwereveryill?"
"Imightcallatthedoorandaskhowyouwere,"shereplied,hesitatingly.
"Now,MissIda,theundertakerwoulddoasmuchasthat."
"Ourmotivesmightdifferjustalittle,"shesaid,droppinghereyes.
"Well,"saidtheartist,laughing,"ifyouwillpreparethedinner,I'llriskundertaker,ancientwoman,andall,ratherthanspendsuchanotherlongstupideveningasIdidlastnight.Iexpectedtomeetyouattheconcertgardenagain."
"That'sstrange,"shesaid.
"IshouldsayratherthatIhopedtomeetyouandyourfatherthere.
WouldyouhavegoneifIhadaskedyou?"
"Imight."
"I'llsetthatdownasoneofthelostopportunitiesoflife."
"Whydidn'tyoulistentothemusic?"
"Well,Ididn't.IthoughtI'dinflictmystupidityonyouforawhile,andcameasfarasyourdoorstepsbeforeIrememberedthatIhadnotbeeninvited;soyouseewhatanarrowescapeyouhad."
InspiteofherselfIdacouldnothelpappearingdisappointedasshesaid,alittlereproachfully,"Wouldafriendhavewaitedforaformalinvitation?"
"Afrienddid,"repliedVanBergregretfully;"buthewon'tagain."
"I'mnotsosureaboutthat;mymusicmusthavefrightenedyouaway."
"IlisteneduntilIfearedthepolicemightthinkIhaddesignsagainstthehouse.Ididn'tknowyouwereamusician.MissMayhew,I'malwaysfindingoutsomethingnewaboutyou,andI'mgoingtoaskyouthiseveningtosingagainformeaballadthemelodyofwhichremindedmeofarunningbrook.Ittookholdonmyfancyandhasbeenrunninginmyheadeversince."
"Oh,youwon'tlikethat;it'sasilly,sentimentallittlething.
Idon'twonderyoupausedandretreated."
"Spareme,MissIda;Ialreadyfeelthatitwasafaint-heartedretreat,inwhichIsufferedseriousloss.Ihaveaccountedformyselfsinceweparted;howdidYOUspendthetime?Ofcourseyouyawnedoveryourmorning'sfatigue,andtookalongnap."
"IndeedIdidnotsleepawink.WhyshouldIbeanymoreindolentthanyourself?Ireadmostoftheafternoon,anddrummedonthepianointheevening."
"IknowthatIlikeyourdrumming,butamnotyetsureaboutyourauthor;buthemustbeanexceedinglyinterestingone,toholdyourattentionalonghotafternoon."
Idacoloredinsuddenembarrassment,butsaid,afteramoment:"I
shallnotgratifyyourcuriosityanyfurther,foryouwouldlaughatmeagainifItoldyou."
"Now,indeed,youhavepiquedmycuriosity."
"Sinceyou,aman,admithavingsomuchofthisfeminineweakness,Iwhoamonlyawomanmaybepardonedforshowingjustalittle.
Whatworkwasitthatsoabsorbedyouyesterdayafternoonthatyouceasedtobehumaninyourneeds?"
"MissMayhew,youhavebeenlaughingatmeinyoursleeveeversinceyoucamethismorning.Ishalltakemyrevengeonyouatoncebyheapingcoalsoffireonyourhead,"andheturnedtowardsheralargepicture,allofwhichwasyetinoutline,saveMr.Eltinge'sbustandface.
Idasprangdownonherkneesbeforeit,exclaiming:"O!mydear,kindoldfriend!He'sjustspeakingtome.Mr.VanBerg,I'llnowmaintainyouareageniusagainstalltheworld.Youhaveputkindness,love,fatherhoodintohisface.Youhavemadeitastrongandnoble,andyettenderandgentleasthemanhimself.I
neverknewitwaspossibleforaportraittoexpresssomuch,"andtearsofstrong,gratefulfeelingfilledhereyes.
Wasitsuccessinhisartorpraisefromherlipsthatgaveherlistenersuchanexquisitethrillofpleasure?Hedidnotstoptoconsider,forhewasnotinananalyticalmoodatthattime.
Hewasonthecrestofthespiritualwavethatwassweepinghimheavenward,ortowardssomebeatificstateofwhichhehadnotdreamtbefore.Hisfaceglowedwithpleasureashesaid:
"Sinceitpleasesyou,it'snomorethanjusticethatyoushouldknowthatyourvisitwasthecauseofmysuccess.Eitheryourlaughoryourkindpartingwordsbrushedthecobwebsfrommymind,andIwasabletodobetterworkinafewhoursthanImighthaveaccomplishedinweeks."
Shetriedtolookatthepicturemoreclosely,butfast-comingtearsblindedher.Thensherose,andavertingherfacehastily,wipedhereyes,asshesaidinalowtone:"Ican'tunderstanditatall,andthememoryofMr.Eltinge'skindnessalwaysovercomesme.Pleasepardonmyweakness.There,Iwon'twasteanymoreofyourtime,"andshereturnedtoherchair.ButherfacestillworetheuncertaintyofanAprilday.
"YouraffectionforMr.Eltinge,"hesaidgently,"isasbeautifulasitisnatural.Nomanifestationofitneedsanyapology,andleastofalltome,forIowetohimfarmorethanlife.ButIampainingyoubyrecallingthepast,"hesaidregretfully,asIda'stearsbegantogatheragain."Letmetrytomakeamendsbyreturningatoncetothepresentandtomywork.BeforeIgoonanyfartherwithyourportraitIwantyoutoputthisrose-budinyourhair,"
andfromahiddennookhebroughtalittlevasecontainingonlyoneexquisitebud.Idahadbarelytimetoseethatitwasincolorandsizepreciselyliketheemblemofherselfthathehadthrownaway,andforafewminutessheutterlylostherself-control.Sheburiedherfaceinherhands,andherlow,stifledsobsfilledVanBergwiththekeenestdistressandperplexity.
"MissIda,"hesaidearnestly,"Iwouldrathereverytearyouaresheddingwereadropofmyblood,"buthiswordsonlymadethemflowfasterstill.
Suddenlyshesprangup,andturningherbackuponhim,dashedawayhertearsalmostfiercely."Oh!thisisshameful!"sheexclaimed,inlow,indignanttones."Mr.VanBerg,whatmustyouthinkofme?PleaseturnMr.Eltinge'sfaceaway,forheislookingatmejustashedidwhenmyheartwasbreaking,and——and——I'velostmyself-control,andIhadbetternotcomeheretillIcanceasebeingsoweakandfoolish."
"Isitweaktobegrateful?"heasked,gently."Isitfoolishtoloveonesothoroughlyentitledtoyourlove?IhonoryouforyourdeepandtenderaffectionforMr.Eltinge,andeverytearyouhaveshedprovestomethatinthisperfectflowerIamnowfindingthetrueemblemofyourself."
"No,"shesaid,almostpassionately,"Ihavenorighttoit.Theotheronethatyouthrewawayistrueofme,andalwayswillbe.
Thisbutmocksmewithitsperfection.IwouldbeahypocriteifIshouldputitinmyhair,andsmilecomplacentlywhileyoupaintedit.Myheartclingstotheotheremblem,andIknowImustdevelopasbestIcan,asthatwouldhavedoneafteritsdestroyerwastakenaway.No,Mr.VanBerg.Ihaveseenmyselfinthestrong,sharplightoftruth.Ifyouarewillingtobemyfriend,pleasebeanhonestone.Myfaithfuloldfriendinthecountrywouldscarcelytakemyportraitifthisperfectflowerwereintroducedwithanysuchmeaningasyouattachtoit,andIcertainlywouldbeashamedtogiveittohim.Mr.Vanberg,weMUSTletbygonesbybygones,orwenevercangeton.SeehowabsurdlyIhaveactedbothyesterdayandto-day,andallthroughrecallingthepast.
Indeed,indeed,itwillneverdoformetocomehereagain,andifyoucanmakesuchamarvellouslikenessofMr.Eltingeasyouhave,Iscarcelythinktherewillbeanyneed."
"MysuccesswithMr.Eltinge'sportraitistheresultofafewhappystrokesthatImightnotbeabletogiveagainifItriedayear.
Believeme,MissMayhew,Inotonlywishtobeanhonestfriend,butaveryconsiderateone.Ipromisenevertourgeyoutodoanythingthatwillcauseyoupain.Icanunderstandhowthefeaturesofyourkindfriendhavetouchedthetenderestchordsofyourheart,andIrespectyourstudyfidelitytoyourconscienceinrefusingtoletmepaintthisbudinyourhair;butyoumustalsodomethejusticetobelievethatImeantnohollowcomplimentwhenIsearchedforitamongtheflorists.MustIthrowthisoneaway,too?"heasked,withaglancethatwasveryardentforafriend;"forsinceIobtaineditforyou,itmustreceiveitsfateatyourhandsonly."
"I'llwearit,simplyasyourgift,withpleasure,"andshefasteneditinherbreastpin,sothatitscrimsonblushrestedagainstthesnowywhitenessofherneck.
Helookedherfullintheeyesandsaid,withlow,sademphasis:
"Idonotdeservesuchrespect."Thentheknowledgethatshewasharboringapurposewhichtroubledherconscience,butwhichshecouldnotabandon,becamethecauseofatraceofheroldrecklessnessofmanner.Sheassumedasuddengayety,asifshehadsteppedoutofshadowsintotoostrongalight,asshesaid:
"Mr.VanBerg,youmaywellhesitatetobringtheappetiteyousayhadlastnighttoourhousethisevening,andifIstayamomentlonger,youwillgetnodinneratall.Ihavenotbeenafterthecrudematerial——asyoucallit——yet,andI'mtoldthatthereisnotamanlivingsoamiableandphilosophical,butthatapoordinnerprovokesmartyr-likeexpression,ifnothingworse;"andwithasmileandapiquancyofmannerthatseemedpeculiarlybrilliantagainstthebackgroundofherdeepandrepressedfeeling,sheagainlefthim.
Hetriedtoreturntohiswork,butfoundhimselfoncemorepossessedbythedemonofunrestandimpatience.Thespiritualwavethathadbeenliftinghimhigherandhigherwaschangingitscharacterandbecomingasmoothlyglidingcurrent.Itwassoirresistiblethatheneverthoughtofresisting."Whyshouldheresist?"heaskedhimself.CircumstanceshadinterestedhiminthisrareUndinebeforeshereceivedawoman'ssoul;circumstanceshadentangledhislifeandhersinwhathadalmostbeenanawfultragedy;andnowcircumstances,orsomethingfarbeyond,wereswiftlydevelopingbeforehiseyesaspirituallovelinessthatwasthecounterpartofheroutwardbeauty,andheassuredhimselfthatitwouldbethegreatestfollyofhislifetoloseatraceoftheexquisiteprocessthathemightbeprivilegedtosee.WhatartistorpoethasnotpicturedhimselfthefairfaceofEveasGodfirstbreathedintoherperfectclaythebreathoflife,orhasnot,inimagination,seentheclosedeyesopeninginsurpriseandintelligenceorkindlingwiththelightoflove?AndyetthechangeinIdaMayhewseemedtoVanBergfarmorewonderfulandinteresting;andtohisfancyif,insteadoflyinginthebeautyofherbreathless,statuesquepreparationforlife,Evehadbeenpossessedbyalegionofdistortingimps,shewouldhavebeenthetypeofthemaidenhefirsthadrecognized.Buthehadseentheseevilspiritsexorcised,andintheirplacewascominganoble,womanlysoul——sweet,tender,andstrong——andtheperfectformandfeaturesseemedbutatransparentmould,acrystalvaseintowhichheavenwaspouringanewanddivinelife.Whyshouldhenotlongtoescapefromthedustymatter-of-factworldandwitnessthisspiritualrepetitionofthemostbeautifulstoryofthepast?ThushisphilosophicalmindwasableoncemoretoreasonthewholematteroutclearlyandprovethathiswishtoannihilatetheinterveninghoursbeforehecoulddaretopresenthimselftoIdaMayhew,wasthemostnaturalandproperdesireimaginable.HeconcludedthatawalkthroughCentralParkmightbanishhisdisquietude,andleavetimeforacarefultoilet,sinceforsomeoccultreasontheoccasionseemedtohimtorequireunusualpreparation.
HeknewhewasunfashionablyearlywhenherangMr.Mayhew'sdoor-bell,buthehadfounditimpossibletocurbhisimpatiencetoseeinwhatnewaspectIdawouldpresentherselfthatevening.
Ahundredtimeshehadqueriedhowshewouldappearinherownhome,howshewouldpresideashostess,andwhetherthetasteofthefloridandfashionablemotherwouldnotbesoapparentastoannoyhimlikeabadtoneinthepicture.yes,thatwasMrs.Mayhew'sparlorintowhichhewasshown.Itdidnotsuggestthemaidenwhohadcometovisit,northequiet,dignifiedgentlemanMr.Mayhewwasseentobewhenatthetouchoflove'swandadegradingvicefellawayfromhim.Buttheartistcouldfindnofaultwiththehostwhogreetedhimpromptly,andwhen,afewmomentslater,therewasabreezyrustleonthestairsandheturnedtogreethishostess,hisfaceflushedwithadmirationandpleasure.Itbecameevidentthattheworshipperofbeautywasinthepresenceofhisdivinity,andhiseveryglanceburnedincensetoherhonor.Shehadtwinedafewrose-leavesinherhair,butworenootherornamentsavetherosehehadgivenherinthemorning,whichevidentlyhadbeenkeptcarefullyfortheoccasion,foritwasunchanged,withtheexceptionthatitrevealeditsheartalittlemoreopenly,asdidIdaherself.Andyetshedidherbesttoinsurethathermannershouldbenomorecordialthanhercharacterofhostessdemanded.
Butinspiteofallshecoulddo,thelightofexultationandintensejoywouldflashintohereyesandtrembleinhertonesthatevening.AmaidenwouldhavebeenblindindeedhadshenotbeenabletoreadtheriddleofVanBerg'sardentfriendshipnow,andIdahadseenthatexpressiontoooftennottoknowitsmeaningwell.Inthemorningshehadstronglyhoped,nowshebelieved.
Shenolongerwalkedbyfaithbutinfullvision,andshetrodwiththegraceofaqueenwhoknowsherpowerintherealmthatwomanlovesbest.Theglowofhereyes,herrepressedexcitement,thatvitalizedeverythingshesaidordid,mystifiedwhiletheycharmedherguest."Shehasbecometruetonature,"hethought,"andlikenatureisfullofmysteriouschanges,forwhichweknownotthecause.Atonetimeitisasharpnorthwind,againthesouthwind.
Thismorningtherewasasuddenshoweroftears,andbeforeitwasoverthesunlightofsmilesflashedthroughthem.NowsheappearslikeaJunemorning,andIpraytheweatherholds."
"Oh,"thoughtIda,inthewild,madgleeofherheart,"howcanI
behavemyselfandlookinnocentandunconscious,seeingwhatIdo?
Heismyverygoodfriendishe?Iwishforonlyonesuchfriendintheworld.Itwouldn'tbepropertohaveanother.Oh,butisn'titrichtoseehowunconsciousheisofhimself!Heispassingintoanexceedinglyacuteattackofmyowncomplaint,andthepoormandoesn'tknowwhatisthematter.Idon'tbelieveheeverlookedatJennieBurtonashelooksatme.Ah,JennieBurton!"Thejoyousnesssuddenlyfadedoutofherfaceandshesigheddeeply.
ItseemedtoVanBergforatimethathisJunemorningmightbecomecloudedafterall,butwhilehisfacewasturnedtowardsherwiththeexpressionitnowworenosadthoughtsormisgivingscouldshadowIdaverylong.
ChapterL.SweptAway.
TherewasnovulgarprofusioninthedinnerwhichIdahadordered,norwereitscoursesinterminable;andasshegracefullyandquietlydirectedeverything,thethoughtwouldkeepinsinuatingitselfinVanBerg'smind,thatthehomeoverwhichshemighteventuallypresidewouldbeanearsuburbofParadise.HeheartilysecondedIda'spurposethatherfathershouldtakepartintheirconversation,anditwasanotherdeepsourceofhergladnessthattheonewhomshehadseensodepressedanddespairing,nowlookedasshewouldalwayswishhimtoappear."Oh,it'stoogoodtolast,"shesighed,asherheartfairlyachedwithitsexcessofjoy.
AfterdinnerMr.MayhewaskedVanBergtolightacigarwithhiminhisstudy,buttheartistdeclinedandfollowedIdatotheparlor.
"Mr.VanBerg,"shesaid,withagreatshowofsurprise,"howisityoudon'tsmokethisevening?ItseemedtomethatyouandCousinIkweredrawntoacertaincornerofMr.Burleigh'spiazzawiththecertaintyofgravitationafterdinner,andthenyouwerelostintheclouds."
"OnthisoccasionIhavetakenmychoiceofpleasuresandhavefollowedyou."
"Thisisaproudmomentforme,"shesaid,withamirthfultwinkleinhereyes."Ineverexpectedtorivalagentleman'scigar,andIdon'tthinkIeverdidbefore."
"Anotherproofofmyfriendship,MissIda."
"Yes,"shereplieddemurely,"anactlikethisgoesagoodwaytowardsmakingmebelieveyouaresincere."
"MissIda,youarealwayslaughingatme.IwishIcouldfindsomewaytogetevenwithyou,andIwilltoo."
"Youdomeinjustice.I,inturn,willlayanofferingonthealtaroffriendshipandwillgowithyouthiseveningtotheconcertgarden."
"Ithinkyouexceedingly,butwillleavetheofferingonthealtar,ifyouwillpermitme.Iwouldmuchratherremaininyourparlor."
"Why,Mr.VanBerg,youarebentonbeingamartyrformysakethisevening."
"Yes,whollybentuponit."
"Howamiablegentlemenareafterdinner!"sheexclaimed."Butwherewasyourappetitethisevening?ClearlyourcookknowsnothingofthepreparationofambrosianorIofnectar,althoughImadethecoffeemyself."
"Didyou?Thataccountsforitsdivineflavor.Don'tyourememberItooktwocups?"
"Isawthatyourpolitenessledyoutosendmeyourcupasecondtime.Isupposeyouaccomplishedavastdealagainto-dayafteryouwereoncefinallyridofanembodimentofAprilweather?"
"IwouldloseyourrespectaltogetherifIshouldtellyouhowI
havespenttheafternoon.Youwouldthinkmeanabsurdjumbleofmoodsandtenses.Imayaswellownup,Isuppose.Ihavedonenothingbutkilltime,andtothatendItookawalkthroughCentralPark."
"Thishotafternoon!Mr.VanBerg,whatpossessedyou?"
"Ademonofimpatience.ItseemedasifoldJoshuahadcommandedthesuntostandstillagain."
"Youmustindeedbyagenius,Mr.VanBerg,forI'vealwaysheardthatthepeculiarlygiftedwerefullofunaccountablemoods."
"Iunderstandthesatireofyourexpression'PECULIARLYgifted,'
butmyturnwillcomebeforetheeveningisover,"andheleanedluxuriouslybackagainstthesofacushionwithalookofinfinitecontentwiththeprospectbeforehim."Blessme,whatisthisoverwhichIhavehalfbrokenmyback,"heexclaimed,andhedraggedoutofitspartialconcealmentahugevolume.
"Pleaseletmetakethatoutofyourway,"saidIda,steppinghastilyforwardwithcrimsoncheeks.
"Don'ttroubleyourself,MissMayhew;fortuneisfavoringmeoncemore,andIamonthepointofdiscoveringthefavoriteauthoryouwouldnotmentionthismorning.Anencyclopedia,asIlive!fromAtoB,withahair-pininsertedsharplyatthewordAmsterdam.
Really,MissIda,Ican'taccountforyourabsorbinginterestinAmsterdam."
"Mr.VanBerg,thereisnouseintryingtohideanythingfromyou.
YoufindmeouteverytimeandI'mreallygrowingsuperstitiousaboutit."
"Iwishyourwordsweretrue;but,forthelifeofme,Ican'tunderstandwhyyoushouldcraveencyclopaediasasAugustreading,norcanIseetheremotestconnectionbetweentheexquisitecolorofyourfaceandtheoldDutchcityofAmsterdam."
"Well,theFatesareagainstmeoncemore.WhyIleftthatbookthereIdon'tknow,forI'mnotusuallysocareless.Mr.VanBerg,Iscarcelyneedtoremindyouofafactthatyoudiscoveredlongago——Idon'tknowanything.Doyounotrememberhowyoutriedtotalkwithmeoneevening?Youtouchedonalmostasmanysubjectsasthathugevolumecontains,andmyfaceremainedasvacantthroughthemallastheblankpagesinthatbookbeforetheprintedmatterbegins."
"Butnow,MissIda,yourfaceistomelikethisbookaftertheprintedmatterbegins,onlyIreadtherethatwhichinterestsmefarmorethananythingwhichthisbulkytomecontains,evenunderthewordAmsterdam."
"Youimaginefarmorethanyousee.Ithinkartistsarelikepoets,andaregiventogreatflights.Besides,youarebecomingversedinmysmalltalk.WhenyoutrieditontheeveningIreferredto,youwerejustatrifleponderous."
"Yes,Icannowseemyselfperforminglikealameelephant.Didyouproposetoreadthisencyclopaediaentirelythrough?"
"Imighthaveskippedartasasubjectfartoodeepforme."
"Whenyoucometothatletmetaketheplaceoftheencyclopaedia.
Iwillsitjustherewhereyoukeepyourbookandgiveyouaseriesoffamiliarlectures."
"Ineverenjoyedbeinglectured,sir!"
"ThenI'llteachyouaftertheSocraticmethod,andaskyouquestions."
"Ifearsomeofthemmightbetoopersonal.Youhavesuchamaniaforsolvingeverything."
"AnddidyoufearthatatsomeofthemanysittingsIshallneedthisfallImightagainbroacheverysubjectunderthesun,andsoyouwereledtoreadanencyclopaediatobeprepared?"
"IsthatwhatyoumeanbytheSocraticmethod?Ideclineanylessonsconcerningartoranythingelseonthatplan,foryouwouldfindouteverything."
"Ishall,anyway.HowlongagoitseemssincewetookthatstupidwalktogetheronMr.Burleigh'spiazza!Wearenearertogethernow,MissIda,thanwewerethen."
"Oh!no,indeed,"sherepliedquickly;"Ihadyourarmonthatoccasion."
"Butyouhavemysincerefriendshipandrespectnow.Ican'ttellyouhowpleasedIwaswhenIsawhowyouhadhonoredthelittleemblematicflowerIgaveyouthismorning.Thatyouwearitto-nightasyouronlyornamentgivesmehopethatyoudovaluemyrespectandregard."
"IthinkIhadbetterlettherose-budansweryou,andIconfessIliketothinkhowperfectitiswhenIrememberthemeaningyougavetoit,thoughhowyoucanrespectmeatallIcannotunderstand.
Still,Iamlikefather——nexttoGod'sfavortherespectofthoseIesteemdoesmosttosustainandreassureme.But,oh!Mr.VanBerg,youcan'tknowwhatanhonestsenseofill-desertIhave.Itissohardjusttodoright,nomatterwhattheconsequencesmaybe."
"ThetroublewithmeisthatIamnottryingasyouare.ButI
know,withabsolutecertainty,thatthestrongestimpulseoftruefriendship,oratleastofmine,inthisinstance,istorendersomeservicetomyfriend.YouwillmakemeveryhappyifyouwilltellmesomethingIcandoforyou."
"Youarehelpingmeverymuchinyourmannertowardsfather,andIdothankyoufromtheverydepthsofmyheart.Innowaycouldyouhavewonfrommeadeepergratitude.And——well——yourkindnessalmosttemptsmetoaskforanotherfavor,Mr.VanBerg."
Hesprangtohersideandtookherhand.
Quicklywithdrawingit,shesaidwithalittledecisivenode:"Youmustsitdownandsitstill,forIhavealong,tiresomestorytotell,andaveryprosaicfavortoask;"forshehadresolved,"heshallgoforwardnowwithhiseyesopen,andheshallneversayI
wonhimbyseemingwhatIwasnot.IfIcan'tdealrightbyJennieBurton,Iwillbyhim."
"Ishallfindnoserviceprosaic;see,I'mallattention,"andhedidlookveryeagerindeed.
"Thatencyclopaediasuggestsmystory,andImayhavetoreferincidentallytomyself."
"Leavethebookout;I'lllistenforages."
"Ishouldbeoutofbreathbeforethat.Mr.VanBerg,I'minearnest;
Idon'tknowanythingworthknowing.Mylifehasbeenworsethanwasted,andtheonlytwothingsIunderstandwellaredancingandflirting.NowIknowyouaredisgusted,butitsthetruth.Myold,fashionablelifeseemstomelikethetawdryscenesofasecond-ratetheatre,whereeverythingisforeffectandnothingisreal.I
havehostsofacquaintances,butIhaven'tanyfriendsexceptMr.
Eltinge."
"AndHaroldVanBerg,"putintheartist,promptly.
"It'sgoodofyoutosaythataftersuchconfessions,"shecontinued,withashyglance."Ihopeitwasn'toutofpoliteness.Well,I'vewakedupatlast.Ithinkyoufirststartledmeoutofmyinsufferablestupidityandsillinessattheconcertgarden,andI'mverymuchobligedtoyoufortheremarkyoumadetoCousinIkonthatoccasion."
"Yes,Iremember,"VanBerggroaned."IwakedyouupasifIweretryingtoputyourshoulderoutofjoint.Well,I'mwakingupalso."
"YouhavenoideawhataperfectshamofalifeIled,"andshetoldhimfranklyofherwastedschooldaysandofhertripabroad,forwhichshehadnopreparationofmindorcharacter."Abutterflymighthaveflownoverthesamegroundandcomebackjustaswise,"
shesaid."ButIhavesuddenlyenteredanewworldoftruthandduty,andIambewildered;Iamanxioustofitmyselfforthesocietyofsensible,cultivatedpeople,andIamdiscouragedbythetaskbeforeme.Iwenttofather'slibraryyesterdayandwasperfectlyappalledbythenumberofbooksandsubjectsthatIknownothingabout.ThefactthatIstumbledintothatencyclopaedia,whichgaveyouthelaughagainstme,showshowhelplessIam.
Indeed,I'mlikealittlechildtryingtofinditswaythroughawildernessofknowledge.IblunderedonasfarasAmsterdam,andthereIstoppedindespair.Ididn'tknowwhatwasbeforeme,andIwasgettingeverythingIhadbeenoverconfusedandmixedupinmymind.Andnow,Mr.VanBerg,withyourthorougheducationandwideexperienceyoucantellmewhattoreadandhowtoread."
VanBerg'sfacewasfairlyalivewithinterest,andhesaideagerly:
"Thefavoryouasksuggestsafargreateroneonmypart.Letmegowithyouthroughthiswildernessofknowledge.Wecantakeupcoursesofreadingtogether."
AtthismomentMr.Mayhewentered,andtheartisthesitatedtogoonwithhisfar-reachingoffers,and,indeed,hesuddenlybegantorealize,withsomeembarrassment,howmuchtheydidinvolve.
ButIdamaintainedherpresenceofmind,andsaid,simply:"Thatwouldbeimpossible,thoughnodoubtexceedinglyhelpfultome.
Here,asintheinstanceofthepictures,yourgood-natureandkindnesscarryyoufarbeyondwhatIeverdreamedofasking.I
merelythoughtthatinsomeofyourmomentsofleisureyoucouldjotdownsomebooksandsubjectsthatwouldbethesameasifyouhadpointedoutsmoothandshadypaths.Yousee,inmyignorance,I'vetriedtopushmywaythroughthewildernessstraightacrosseverything.LasteveningIpesteredmyfatherwithsomanyquestionsaboutpoliticsandthetopicsoftheday,thathethoughtIhadlostmywits."
Mr.Mayhewleanedbackinhischairandlaughedheartily,ashementallyejaculated:"Welldone,littlegirl!"
"Iwillbrushupmyliteraryideas,anddothebestIcan,verygladly,"saidVanBerg."Butyougreatlyunderrateyourselfandoverratemyability.Iamstillbutontheedgeofthiswildernessofknowledgemyself,andincrossingawildernessonelikescompany."
"Oh,Icouldneverkeepupwithyourmanlystrides,"saidIda,withasuddentrilloflaughter."Havingsecuredmywish,Ishallnowrewardyouwithsomeverypoormusic,whichwillsuggestmyneedoflessonsinthatdirectionalso."
VanBergwasnotlongindiscoveringthatshewouldneverbecomeagreatmusician,nomatterhowmanylessonsshehad.Butsheplayedwithtasteandagracefulrhythm,whichprovedthatmusicinitssimplestformsmightbecomealanguagebywhichshecouldexpressherthoughtandfeeling.
"Ida,"saidMr.Mayhew,alittleabruptly,"Iwishtoseeafriendattheclub.I'llbebackbeforetheeveningisover."
"Pleasedon'tstaylong,"Idaanswered,lookingwistfullyafterhim.
Thentheyfoundsomeballad-musicthattheycouldsingtogether,andVanBergexpressedgreatpleasureinfindinghowwelltheirvoicesblended.
"Youhavemodestlykeptquiteallsummer,andIamjustfindingoutthatyouplayandsing,"hesaid.
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